Fat and happy?...or... skinny and starving?

13

Replies

  • cruzcrzyMarie
    cruzcrzyMarie Posts: 251 Member
    Of what you listed specifically, "fat and happy". However, I do not consider 10 pounds over my current maintenance weight fat.





    Marie
  • iampanda
    iampanda Posts: 176 Member
    People often act like its either or. You CAN be thin AND happy, too.
  • steph1278
    steph1278 Posts: 483 Member
    I never understood the all or nothing mentality. You don't have to starve to lose weight. I am losing weight and still enjoying the food that I love, just in moderation now. What good is being skinny if you're miserable all the time? I'm aiming for happy and healthy.
  • VanessaGS
    VanessaGS Posts: 514 Member
    I don't know why starving would even be an option. I'm losing 1 Lb per week for the last few months and I've never been starving or felt I was depriving myself of anything. I did the holidays no problem and enjoyed myself...I went to town at my buddies b-day BBQ...no biggie and I didn't kill myself with cardio the next day at the gym. I allow myself to have a good time and once I'm at maintenance, it really shouldn't be too big a deal. Even when I'm not going to town, I eat very well...I just make overall better nutritional decisions 80-90% of the time and let myself have fun on occasions that are special...not every day needs to be a feast day and no day should be a famine day. It's called moderation and it's beneficial to an overall healthy lifestyle.

    I agree with this. I'm never starving. It's just about making healthier choices. I still allow myself to splurge once in a while, but definitely not on a daily basis like I used to. I'm way happier and way healthier today than where I was a year ago.
  • marjoleina
    marjoleina Posts: 189 Member
    Healthy and at a healthy weight
  • imhungry2012
    imhungry2012 Posts: 240 Member
    Healthy and Happy...which includes the occasional spoonful of Nutella.
  • lizzybethclaire
    lizzybethclaire Posts: 849 Member
    I don't think 10 pounds over ideal weight is "fat." I would rather be at a healthy weight that is easier to stick too than a weight that is hard to attain.
  • Ruined1
    Ruined1 Posts: 4
    If you want to eat more then do it, eat more and exercise more to make sure you burn what you earn and you will actually LOSE weight. You can be at your ideal weight AND up your calorie intake if you have a little extra time to burn those calories into energy.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/654536-in-place-of-a-road-map-2-0-revised-7-2-12
  • Fannyannefeisty
    Fannyannefeisty Posts: 53
    It's a handsome straw man you got there!! :laugh: It's not an either/or. :noway:
  • jc2103
    jc2103 Posts: 11
    Would you rather...

    always be 10lbs over your ideal weight. (still healthy, still look good, just a little more than you would like to be) And still be able to enjoy yourself on holidays, vacations, birthday parties, occasional cheat days, etc, while keeping track the rest of the time.

    or...be at your ideal weight but NEVER allow yourself to go over on your calories, and working out for hours a day to make up for any high calorie/fat/ and sugar foods you allow yourself?
    It's a false dilemma. There's nothing stopping you from being at your ideal weight AND having fun.
  • LetsGetFitMama
    LetsGetFitMama Posts: 102
    Oddly enough, a friend just posted on facebook how she doesn't understand why some (me) want to change when we should just accept who we are. I am not ok with being FAT! I hate being FAT ... what do I want to be? Healthy, fit and happy! Your options are not any choices I would pick.
  • Leamac83
    Leamac83 Posts: 99 Member
    Anyone with half a brain is always going to pick being happy over being miserable...thats bascially how you have laid it out. But the truth of the matter is the majority of fat people arent happy, nor healthy. Hence why they are on this website in the first place.

    I may sound like the bad guy but your making excuses for yourself. Choose to be your ideal weight and happy and still enjoy the holidays the cakes and the cheat days. Im at my happiest when ive just completed my 10k run and then i get to eat the burger ive been craving all day.

    It is possbile to have it all you know, youve just got to make it happen.
  • LavenderBouquet
    LavenderBouquet Posts: 736 Member
    Such ignorance. ..why not fit and happy? This is lazy azz mentality...this is exactly what fat ppl tell themselves so they have an excuse to stay the same...good luck with that
    I choose neither. I USED to be the latter. Now, I choose health.
    Neither. I refuse to settle and I refuse to starve.
    Option C ... be at MY ideal weight for MY own body while allowing myself to eat what I want, when I want, while lifting three days a week and pole dancing one day a week.

    You guys have obviously never played "would you rather." The point is to pick one, I'm sure the OP realizes there are other options and gradients in between. We are in fun and games people! Lol :P
  • eyeshuh
    eyeshuh Posts: 333
    So... looks like a lot of people didn't actually read the post and just went off of the title.

    While I personally will never be at my ideal weight... had a body fat analysis done a few years ago... even if I lost EVERY ounce of fat on my body I'd still be 10-15lbs over my ideal weight...

    Point being, I would rather be able to enjoy myself and not be constantly punishing myself if I eat one piece of cake at a wedding that I will go to 3 times a year, I'd rather still be at a healthy weight and be able to enjoy food and life than it my IDEAL weight and NEVER allowing myself a holiday.

    While I feel for you, I think you are kind of missing the point of the replies. A lot of us will reach our "ideal" weight in a healthy way and never starve ourselves or punish ourselves for a piece of cake. Maybe you should have included in your OP "This is my situation".

    And the other point that people are bringing up - while your perception might be that you are fat at 10-15lbs above your ideal weight, it is unlikely others see you that way. Even if you can't drop that last handful of pounds, you will probably still look great.
  • windycitycupcake
    windycitycupcake Posts: 516 Member
    haha you don't have to deny yourself cheat days and work out for hours a day to be thin or to be your "ideal" weight. that's simply not true. just have to have some balance. i drink and dont work out every day and sometimes i eat chilaquiles and french toast...im still losing weight.

    OP you shouldn't tell yourself stuff like this if you really are serious about losing weight. why would anyone be motivated by self punishment? Losing weight doesn't have to be torture.
  • judypriv
    judypriv Posts: 206 Member
    If ten lbs over goal is fat I hate to think what I am! I would be THRILLED to be that fat!
  • megalin9
    megalin9 Posts: 771 Member
    I don't normally get upset by threads because I realize this is the internet, and people may say or do whatever they please. There's nonsense posted every day, and I let it slide right off. However, this OP bothers me because there are so many new people on here and so many people with eating disorders. Posts like this just feed the mentality that getting healthy and losing weight means starving yourself and that you will never be happy because you have to deprive yourself of things you love.

    I enjoy all of my favorite things...on a regular basis...and I'm down almost 50 pounds. I am still overweight, but I am more fit than I have been in my entire life, and I see no reason why I can't continue to lose weight and eventually get to a goal weight where I am happy, never hungry, completely satisfied, and enjoying all the food!

    Also, 10 pounds over goal weight is NOT fat. Skinny =/= happy or not happy. Fat =/= to happy or not happy.

    :noway:
  • MaraDiaz
    MaraDiaz Posts: 4,604 Member
    Skinny healthy and happy, thanks.

    Besides, a lot of fun foods trigger cravings and excess hunger. A little now and then doesn't work for me. If it ever does, I will cheerfully indulge.
  • EmilyOfTheSun
    EmilyOfTheSun Posts: 1,548 Member
    ummmm.....You can also be fit and happy. I eat what I want, in moderation. Some days I don't log my food, I might gain a tiny bit of weight from going over on calories, but not enough to make me look "fat" in any way. As long as I don't have a whole entire week of "misbehaving" then I'm fine. I'd rather be fit and happy than fat and happy any day. You don't have to starve yourself or workout for hours and hours to look good, and you can still eat yummy, "bad" foods.
  • Hellbent_Heidi
    Hellbent_Heidi Posts: 3,669 Member
    Would you rather...

    always be 10lbs over your ideal weight. (still healthy, still look good, just a little more than you would like to be) And still be able to enjoy yourself on holidays, vacations, birthday parties, occasional cheat days, etc, while keeping track the rest of the time.

    or...be at your ideal weight but NEVER allow yourself to go over on your calories, and working out for hours a day to make up for any high calorie/fat/ and sugar foods you allow yourself?

    To each his own... but for me: FAT AND HAPPY ALL THE WAY! I feel like as long as I'm being healthy 80-90% of the time... I Love food! I want to enjoy it when I eat it, and not feel horrible about myself for eating things I really enjoy.

    Thoughts
    Do you really believe you can't be at your ideal weight and not have to work out HOURS every day and never eat anything good? That seems like just a lame excuse not to work hard towards a goal (and good health) in my opinion....

    By the way...I don't know too many people who consider themselves "fat" and are still truly happy! If 'enjoying yourself' means eating junk food or dessert on vacation or at a party vs. having the energy to go hiking, biking and looking good in a great dress or bathing suit, than I'll take the latter :happy:
  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
    It doesn't have to be one extreme or the other. Whether intended or not, your post gives off the idea that there is only those 2 options you listed.

    Agreed.

    I will be at my best weight, happy, and still enjoying food.

    These these things are not mutually exclusive :noway:
  • brian90
    brian90 Posts: 285 Member
    neither. just be my healthy weight.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member

    able to enjoy yourself on holidays, vacations, birthday parties, occasional cheat days, etc, while keeping track the rest of the time.


    i am at my ideal weight and still do all of the above....
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    So... looks like a lot of people didn't actually read the post and just went off of the title.

    While I personally will never be at my ideal weight... had a body fat analysis done a few years ago... even if I lost EVERY ounce of fat on my body I'd still be 10-15lbs over my ideal weight...

    Point being, I would rather be able to enjoy myself and not be constantly punishing myself if I eat one piece of cake at a wedding that I will go to 3 times a year, I'd rather still be at a healthy weight and be able to enjoy food and life than it my IDEAL weight and NEVER allowing myself a holiday.

    While I feel for you, I think you are kind of missing the point of the replies. A lot of us will reach our "ideal" weight in a healthy way and never starve ourselves or punish ourselves for a piece of cake. Maybe you should have included in your OP "This is my situation".

    And the other point that people are bringing up - while your perception might be that you are fat at 10-15lbs above your ideal weight, it is unlikely others see you that way. Even if you can't drop that last handful of pounds, you will probably still look great.

    ^^^ I don't need to reply because this one answered it all.
  • moonshadows72
    moonshadows72 Posts: 180 Member
    10 lbs over ideal weight is not that much really, but what is usualy ignored, is that the person has been eating and been "happy" for a little while. this likely is what caused them to go from ideal weight to 10 over ideal weight. but if one choses to just be "fat and happy" then the weight WILL NOT STOP at 10lbs over. they may find themselves 30, 50, or even 100llbs over ideal weight where they once were.

    Its not that complicated, one just has to understand that if they eat what they want when they want, and its more than the calories used in a day, then they will almost always gain weight.

    theres nothing i wont let myself have, but i DO understand that it needs to be in moderation, or less often, or that i need to make sure that i work out extra to compensate.

    it dosent have to be such a horrible or difficult experience! treat yourself occasionaly, but Discipline and control are key!

    Plus as good as fat (eating what u want whenever) feels, theres absolutely NO comparason to how good you feel mentaly and physicaly after losing as little as 10 lbs!
  • DeeJayTJ
    DeeJayTJ Posts: 355 Member
    Such ignorance. ..why not fit and happy? This is lazy azz mentality...this is exactly what fat ppl tell themselves so they have an excuse to stay the same...good luck with that

    agree!

    i used to think I was eating whatever i wanted and not gaining any weight until one day i was 65lbs overweight!
  • jr1985
    jr1985 Posts: 1,033 Member
    Such ignorance. ..why not fit and happy? This is lazy azz mentality...this is exactly what fat ppl tell themselves so they have an excuse to stay the same...good luck with that
    I choose neither. I USED to be the latter. Now, I choose health.
    Neither. I refuse to settle and I refuse to starve.
    Option C ... be at MY ideal weight for MY own body while allowing myself to eat what I want, when I want, while lifting three days a week and pole dancing one day a week.

    You guys have obviously never played "would you rather." The point is to pick one, I'm sure the OP realizes there are other options and gradients in between. We are in fun and games people! Lol :P

    THANK YOU!!!!!
  • PinkyKiwii
    PinkyKiwii Posts: 512 Member
    .
  • neverstray
    neverstray Posts: 3,845 Member
    Yeah, this. I've really been torturing myself with this question. I can drink wine every night, not log my food, just eat reasonably, but still have cheeseburgers and fries for lunch, and be about 15 lbs over where I am now, but that's still healthy from a BMI perspective and really other than exercising and paying minimal attention to food, I can do that.

    Or, I struggle and fight everyday, counting and exercising and working hard, eating very good high quality food, and keep those 15 lbs off, and work to fight harder for a few more body fat percentages, and push, push, push; where everything matter, everything counts, and even looking at a cookie defeats everything I've it in for that day.

    I don't know. Sometimes I feel like its just not worth it. Life is to be lived.

    A happy medium could be an extra 5 or 10 lbs, a little cutting back, but still enjoy a little wine, and a few small indulgences. I haven't yet resolved it in my mind. Right now, I want to cut hard and see my abs over this coming summer and get my body fat down to around 15%, ideally 12%, but I don't know if I can do 12. So, that's my goal...a promise I made to myself that I'll do. But, once I do it and hold it through the summer, I'm not sure where I'll go from there. I do miss out on a lot of things because of what I consider overall, an extremely restrictive lifestyle. I don't know if it's worth it.

    Healthy is important. But, being completely obsessed by it is not. But, I take the lead from my mom. And, for some reason, something just drives me. I don't know what it is. I wish I could relax a little. My mom at 62 looked better than most 20-year-olds. She was a hot mom and worked out like a fiend and ate like a champ, when she went down, she went down swinging, and I guess I feel like I owe that to myself too. It was such a beautiful thing to watch. She died strong and willful. I learned a good lesson from her. And I feel a bit of shame when I see people with real health problems, and I'm perfectly capable, and I'm being lazy.

    I dunno, there are a lot of things that drive me. But, I do think a lot about relaxing my standards a little bit and enjoying my life more. There's probably a happy place somewhere in there that I need to strive for.

    Sorry, I j should have just done a witty one-liner, but this hit me at the right time where I've been thinking about this a lot.
  • cad39too
    cad39too Posts: 874 Member
    I am at my ideal weight, fit, healthy and happy - I don't deny myself anything, although I might control the portion size sometimes. It really isn't an 'either or' deal - but if it was????

    Probably 10lbs over.....but given that I lift alot now and plan to continue lifting heavier, that will probably end up being the case anyway :happy:

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