Ending 1200 Calorie Bashing: Respecting Your Peers

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Dear MFP Community,

I've been a member for years and I felt unwelcome in forums before because I am on a doctor-recommended 1100-1200 calorie diet. This time around I've really dug my heels in and made great friends in the community--lots of friends who share my struggles with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrom (PCOS) and Insulin Resistance (IR). Over the past few weeks, it has become more and more apparent that my friends and I are fearful of contributing to forums. When we say we are on low-calorie diets, you send us info from In Place of a Road Map (IPOARM). You tell us we are starving ourselves and that we are going to fail.

You, for the most part, are not doctors. You cannot keep making blanket statements. Yes, there are several people with eating disorders eating less than is healthy. We are not those people. You have every right to be concerned for people actually starving themselves, but you have no right to assume that calculations that worked for you will work for those with metabolic, endocrine, or other like disorders.

I am 325lbs. I was 340 when I began this last change in regimen three weeks ago. Being morbidly obese is at best going to make me diabetic and at worst going to kill me. I sincerely need and rely on the support I get from MFP. I've lost 60lbs twice before with this caloric intake. My diet never stalled and if it had I would have seen my team of doctors and readjusted. I gained weight back because I stopped tracking and started eating out again: I had not built a system for dealing with life's stresses, and I had not become an active person.

This is going to be a long post, but please bear with me. I know it needs to be said repeatedly because those found to be advocating 1200-calorie diets or more extreme caloric restriction are sometimes flagged and banned. I do not think anyone should undertake such caloric restrictions without medical advisement. I am speaking so that those with exceptional circumstance and doctor-recommended caloric restrictions can stop being treated with such disdain.

I have been very fortunate in that this time around I could undergo a visit to the BOD POD to find my accurate body composition. TDEE/BMR calculations are just estimates based on average metabolisms. For example, even the online BMI calculators (with exceptionally precise measurement of inches) gave me a number 7% higher than actual body composition testing. Sometimes caloric increases aid in weight loss; for some (again ideally under doctor's orders), seemingly severely low caloric intake is absolutely necessary. Either way, you can have a 1200-calorie regimen that is optimized and much healthier than a 2400-calories regimen that is full of crap food. It's all what you make of it.

Please consider the following research:

"The basal metabolic rate varies between individuals. One study of 150 adults representative of the population in Scotland reported basal metabolic rates from as low as 1027 kcal per day (4301 kJ) to as high as 2499 kcal (10455 kJ); with a mean BMR of 1500 kcal (6279 kJ). Statistically, the researchers calculated that 62.3% of this variation was explained by differences in fat free mass. Other factors explaining the variation included fat mass (6.7%), age (1.7%), and experimental error including within-subject difference (2%). The rest of the variation (26.7%) was unexplained. This remaining difference was not explained by sex nor by differing tissue sized of highly energetic organs such as the brain.[9]

Thus there are differences in BMR even when comparing two subjects with the same lean body mass. The top 5% of people are metabolizing energy 28-32% faster than individuals with the lowest 5% BMR.[10] For instance, one study reported an extreme case where two individuals with the same lean body mass of 43 kg had BMRs of 1075 kcal/day (4.5 MJ) and 1790 kcal/day (7.5 MJ). This difference of 715 kcal (67%) is equivalent to one of the individuals completing a 10 kilometer run every day.[10]"

See the Wikipedia entry for BMR to see the exact sources. They stand up.

These discussions bashing 1200-calorie diets are honestly extremely cruel and make those like me feel extremely unwelcome on MFP--even though they may be chockablock with good intentions. Certainly there are people on 1200-calorie diets attempting unrealistically fast weight loss and harming themselves. BUT, that's not all of us. Since when have hyperbolic statements done anyone any good?

It is also worth noting that I'm not starving. Again, I have been in the BOD POD and have used indirect calorimetry to find out my actual TDEE. It is VERY low and I would not go near starvation mode until under 900 calories for an extended period of time. My personal circumstance is not common. No one should try to follow what I'm doing without medical advice and testing. I'm going to keep repeating that--lest I be accused of supporting anorexia.

My diet, right now, at 1100-1200 calories is healthier than it has ever been. I don't eat diet foods, from 100-calorie packs to diet pop to 1% milk. I don't take any shortcuts and at the same time I don't care if you do--if that is working for you and you've checked on its safety and you're obese or morbidly obese, stay strong.

Yes, when I lose weight, when I get to goal, things might change with my caloric intake or breakdown of macros. Right now, due to the insulin resistance, I stay under 100 carbs. It's no Atkins diet, but it really is effective for me. I want to be able to talk to my fellow cysters (nickname for women with PCOS) about how to divide macros, create meal plans, and do everything else under the sun without people attacking me.

Just look at this recent thread (and it's just one very very recent one; there are tons of others that are much more judgmental): http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/870685-i-feel-sorry-for-women.

That was the breaking point for me. I don't need someone to feel sorry for me. You know what, no one gave me one bit of advice as I gained and gained weight. You'd think that on a forum like this people would be aware of the drastic, immediate dangers associated with obesity and especially morbid obesity; these conditions are so dangerous that doctors will readily recommend radical surgery (like gastric bypass or Lap-Band) and drastically low-calorie liquid diets (under 700 calories a day, with doctor supervision), because even the significant risk of those steps is sometimes less severe than the dangers of continued obesity. So when you take someone like me who is putting a great deal of effort into managing a doctor-recommended low-calorie diet, and you heap on discouragement, you are actively sapping my willpower and endangering my well-being.

Take as an example this VERY popular thread "1200 And Why It Won't Work," where a trainer goes on to offer medical advice to people. l chimed in to suggest that morbidly obese and obese individuals seek medical consultation, and I was attacked and told that this trainer was better than a doctor (!!!). People testifying that they are successful on lower calories or people saying they had metabolic or thyroid issues were disregarded and told they would fail in the future. All in all, this thread ( http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/865024-1200-and-why-it-won-t-work ) has received well over 300 comments! Most of these comments praise the OP and contribute to insulting those on low-calorie diets.

Yes, there will always be a constant stream of seemingly thin people saying "Help I'm on 1200 and I'm So Hungry" or "OMG I Can't Even Finish 1200 Calories." Most people respond to these people with complete aggression. "You're starving yourself!" "You're just a loser looking for sympathy." "You just want to be patted on the back for eating 1200!"

You know what we need to be saying? "Hey, here is IPOARM. Check out if 1200 is actually where you should be; MFP might be under-calculating for you." "Hey, here are some ways to make 1200 calories fill you up--more veggies, alternate macro percentages, etc." Finally, "Did you check with a nutritionist if this is recommended for you? It seems low for your activity level/size/height/whatever and it might be safe to get medical consult." That is support. That gives options and hope. That is what we should be here for.

Where are we at as a community when the person recommending medical consultation and highlighting that there is not a one-method-fits-all solution is treated like they are absurd? That thread is downright discouraging and depressing. Why couldn't it have carried the tone of something like "1200-Calorie Roadblocks and Alternatives?" Why would it outright attack people like me and try to make us feel doomed?

So again, please, try to actually be my fitness pals, not my fitness judge and jury. Please understand how diverse bodies are. Please consider how diverse diets are. For example, I don't eat diet food, but I have no right to make someone feel bad for grabbing a Special-K shake or a Lean Cuisine. At the same time, I can be a friend and discuss the benefits of a chemical-free at-home smoothie or the problems with sodium in pre-packaged food. I am here to be a friend, to help you be the best version of you as much as you can help me be the best version of me. Nothing is really wrong with IPOARM and for a lot of people raising calories seems to boost their metabolisms and help them--because they were set too low originally. I think what Dan has done on here is commendable; I think he is fantastic, but you can't use his tools as a weapon against everyone. Dan's system of calculations can't accomodate my extreme circumstance and that is alright. It's no fault of Dan. It's no fault of mine.

Just think of how you talk to others; stop assuming everyone is stupider than you; stop assuming everything you did is what they need to do. These are the same assumptions that lead you to believe fat people have been drowning themselves in fast food, coca cola, and twinkies. Well, that's not the case for me either. As a nearly 20-year pescatarian who eats an ethically-concerned whole food diet, I gain weight slowly and steadily at 2000 calories. Even in the mid-300s (and I've been over 250 since puberty) my cholesterol is remarkably low. My blood pressure is also excellent. Not all people got fat the same damn way, and our physiologies and psychologies differ enough that there is no one formula that will keep us all losing weight and feeling healthy. Again, in my own case I need very low carbs to lose weight and feel energized; many others with different metabolisms need a higher carb count to do the same.

Respect the individual. Please give people the benefit of the doubt and open discussions, don't shut them down. There's even a difference between saying "You might want to check out IPOARM and double-check your calories" vs. "You're starving yourself; eat more!!!." Words are very powerful things and we have to be careful with them.

With love,
Natalie
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Replies

  • msginamay
    msginamay Posts: 1 Member
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    Well said! Thank you for posting! :heart:
  • Bakkasan
    Bakkasan Posts: 1,027 Member
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    It matters not, you are doing it wrong and there are people here DYING to tell you why. There will be the "you are lying" crowd, the "you can't count" crowd, and the very soapboxy "snowflake" crowd.

    Every human is a machine, every machine is the same, and calories in=calories out period.

    EDIT: My whole post is sarcasm towards the people mentioned in my post, not you OP.
  • Kadesha72
    Kadesha72 Posts: 109 Member
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    Well said, Nat!
  • KenosFeoh
    KenosFeoh Posts: 1,837 Member
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    Exactly! We're individuals, and one size does not fit all.
  • fightininggirl
    fightininggirl Posts: 792 Member
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    Dear Natalie
    thank you for posting this. I was also reccomended this eating calories because of recovering for my binge eating problem. with my eating rehab course. before then I was not eating enough healthy foods. I am succesful eating these calories and lost 20 pounds from doing so. We are here to support and encourage one another to get fit. not bash those who eat a certain number of calories. I applaud Natalie for having the courage to think of us 1200 calorie gals.
  • Siege_Tank
    Siege_Tank Posts: 781 Member
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    Where are we at as a community when the person recommending medical consultation and highlighting that there is not a one-method-fits-all solution is treated like they are absurd? That thread is downright discouraging and depressing. Why couldn't it have carried the tone of something like "1200-Calorie Roadblocks and Alternatives?" Why would it outright attack people like me and try to make us feel doomed?

    So again, please, try to actually be my fitness pals, not my fitness judge and jury. Words are very powerful things and we have to be careful with them.

    With love,
    Natalie

    I love this whole post, but especially that quote.

    Where are we as a community if the person recommending medical consultation ... is treated like they are absurd?

    - at a turning point where some people need to stop pushing their habits and beliefs onto other people as "The Only Way To Jesus". People like you should be cheered for standing up and calling out intimidation and a culture of insulting people who follow this website's own calorie recommendations.

    Yes, people can lose weight with a less drastic calorie cut, and -2 lbs a week would require a caloric restriction below 1200...(which is why MFP stops there) but most of us are so sick and tired of being overweight and tired of hating ourselves and feeling like we aren't good enough because we are overweight that we need to do something about it NOW, we need to make ACTUAL progress traveling down the road.

    If you start a long journey, and only make it a half mile from your home, how likely is it that you would turn around and convince yourself that you should go back and sit on your couch.. As opposed to making it ten miles, turning around would be just as hard as pushing forward.

    This is a psychological battle because we cannot quit our drug or coping mechanism of choice. Alcoholics can stop drinking, heroin users can go to rehab, but overeaters cannot stop eating, in fact it is required that they continue to eat, and all it takes to fall off the wagon is "just one more bite"
  • RoadsterGirlie
    RoadsterGirlie Posts: 1,195 Member
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    What a great post. While I generally don't cater to the "special snowflakes" out there, I will say this. We all have different shoe sizes and different heights. Why can't we have different caloric needs as well?

    I don't think there is a one size fits all when it comes to a losing weight, but there are some ways of eating (ie counting calories and getting in adequate nutrition like lean protein and veggies) that will help most people.

    You have a great attitude, and I know you are going to be nothing but a success on your journey.

    If you are open to advice, one thing I noticed is that you said you don't get much exercise. If it's possible, try lifting weights and building lean muscle. Lean muscle will burn more calories, even when you are at rest, allowing you to get more food, and still lose weight.
  • jesslintch
    jesslintch Posts: 63 Member
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    Good for you, Natalie! You make a lot of excellent points. There are often times I would like to chime in on a conversation, but don't feel like the backlash is worth it.

    P.S. This is not a "these people are mean" reaction. By all means, tell it like it is and don't baby grown adults looking for validation to do something wrong. However, there is a definite difference between an honest suggestion and an attack.
  • nataliescalories
    nataliescalories Posts: 292 Member
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    What a great post. While I don't cater to the "special snowflakes" out there, I will say this. We all have different shoe sizes and different heights. Why can't we have different caloric needs as well?

    I don't think there is a one size fits all when it comes to a losing weight, but there are some ways of eating (ie counting calories and getting in adequate nutrition like lean protein and veggies) that will help most people.

    You have a great attitude, and I know you are going to be nothing but a success on your journey.

    If you are open to advice, one thing I noticed is that you said you don't get much exercise. If it's possible, try lifting weights and building lean muscle. Lean muscle will burn more calories, even when you are at rest, allowing you to get more food, and still lose weight.

    Thanks! I am completely committed to becoming more fit in every way. As you can see on my profile, I'm signed up for 7 different 5ks in the spring. I just finished my first one on Saturday (quite a victory at my weight). It's very difficult to increase activity at 325lbs, so I am adding as much as I can as safely as I can. Due to the high testosterone levels in women such as myself (women with PCOS) there are many different studies discouraging much weight lifting because it might contribute to altering/upsetting testosterone or androgyn levels. My doctor is actually one of the lead researchers leading this study, so we are testing some things out. Right now I just do 5lb-15lb weights. Hopefully I can increase more as more weight comes off.
  • My0WNinspiration
    My0WNinspiration Posts: 1,146 Member
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    Great post Nat
  • krithsai
    krithsai Posts: 668 Member
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    Thank you for writing this. I have only about 10-12 lbs to lose, but if I just happen to be really satiated at around 1300 calories, who else is to judge? My doctor is happy with my blood sugar, cholestrol, thyroid levels and other vitals. Why I need to eat more to fit into someone else's idea of a healthy caloric goal is beyond me.

    Like I said in another forum, I am a vegetarian who hates most kinds of fruit. My veggies, beans, lentils and eggs only take up so many calories in a given day. A whole egg is only 80 calories, but 2 eggs can fill me up for 6-8 hrs...something wrong with me? I don't think so.
  • Emma_Problema
    Emma_Problema Posts: 422 Member
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    I'll be honest and say that while your post is really important in that it's a great reminder that MFP is supposed to be a supportive community and not a bunch of attack dogs, I think there is a valuable reason behind why people discourage others from eating 1200 cal diets and refer people who do to IPOARM.

    Not everyone has all of the issues you described - a lot of the people doing 1200 are not obese and do not have medical issues. You get to be the special snowflake. Not everyone can also afford to see dietitians or use a bod pod. Blanket advice is very useful and I would say that for 99% of people 1200 calories is too low. Metabolisms do vary, but that's why BMR uses an average and people are encouraged to play around with their numbers after giving eating more a try.

    I'm also going to point out that saying "1200 calories is ok for me! It's ok for you too!" seems a bit irresponsable given that you are medically recommended to do so. I'm expecting swarms of "I do 1200 calories and I love it so everyone telling me to eat more should shut up" comments.

    But yes. You are correct. Supportive community, blah blah. Play nice, blah blah.
  • Nurseblondy
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    Just wanted to say your passion inspires me and you really know you're stuff. Everybody thinks they are a nutrition expert after they read a few diet books. You are the only one (and your doctor) who knows what is best for your body, given your health history. Always do what makes you feel the most happy in your own skin. You live with the results, not the ones with judgements behind a key board. Everyone has their own story and we should spend more time encouraging than judging. Good luck with your weight loss!
  • kathyms13
    kathyms13 Posts: 497 Member
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    good luck chuck
  • fbmandy55
    fbmandy55 Posts: 5,263 Member
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    Just curious. Did your doctor put you on a 1100-1200 diet BECAUSE of your PCOS?
  • celb500
    celb500 Posts: 76
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    I'm on the same diet and I now weigh 146 pounds at 5ft 10 - I am fine on this diet and I eat loads (check out my diary it is public or feel free to add me)

    I have IBS and this diet stops me from having terrible attacks of cramping and other nasty stuff so i love it.

    WE ARE ALL GROWN ADULTS, RESPECT EACH OTHERS CHOICES.

    Love this threadand good for you!
  • kariannmbc
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    Very well said! Everyone does have different caloric needs, and if your doctor put you on a 1100 - 1200 calorie allowance, ignore the rest of us. :-)

    I was on 1200 calories, and I found that when I worked out too, I was a total grouch, so upping it a little worked for me (and made people around me not want to strangle me). But for one of my best friends, 1200 was exactly where she needed it.
  • mzjessicaxo
    mzjessicaxo Posts: 330 Member
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    Thank you Natalie! I love this post <3 Everyone is different
  • firstsip
    firstsip Posts: 8,399 Member
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    I'll be honest and say that while your post is really important in that it's a great reminder that MFP is supposed to be a supportive community and not a bunch of attack dogs, I think there is a valuable reason behind why people discourage others from eating 1200 cal diets and refer people who do to IPOARM.

    Not everyone has all of the issues you described - a lot of the people doing 1200 are not obese and do not have medical issues. You get to be the special snowflake. Not everyone can also afford to see dietitians or use a bod pod. Blanket advice is very useful and I would say that for 99% of people 1200 calories is too low. Metabolisms do vary, but that's why BMR uses an average and people are encouraged to play around with their numbers after giving eating more a try.

    I'm also going to point out that saying "1200 calories is ok for me! It's ok for you too!" seems a bit irresponsable given that you are medically recommended to do so. I'm expecting swarms of "I do 1200 calories and I love it so everyone telling me to eat more should shut up" comments.

    But yes. You are correct. Supportive community, blah blah. Play nice, blah blah.

    You said everything I was going to say, so, QFT. :heart:
  • Ed98043
    Ed98043 Posts: 1,333 Member
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    I follow a 1,200 calorie a day diet because it's the only way that I see results. It took me 4 months of 1,200 calories a day to lose 17 lbs - that's only a pound a week which couldn't be considered rapid starvation by anyone's definition. I agree that no one's immune to the calories in-calories out rule, but some of us have lower metabolic rates for various reasons. There's no "one plan fits all".
This discussion has been closed.