Spouse Trying to Sabotage Weight Loss
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My husband has been told by men that his wife is "mmm" and he looks at them at says, "I know."
What does 'mmm' mean?
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You could also introduce her to "Augmentative Paleolithic Shakeology." The primary tenant being that she can add as many shakes to her existing diet as she wants without counting the calories because you don't have to count with paleo.0
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I wonder how many people actually noticed this was in the Chit-Chat, Fun, and Games section..lol.
So, the guy can't figure out how to navigate the sections of the forums. He's distraught that his wife may be getting hot.
Nope. That's not why I pointed that out..lmao.
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On the other hand... don't shoot things down during a brainstorming session....
Part of brainstorming is immediately ruling out very very bad ideas...
Slow down angledirt. It goes way too far but this is brainstorming. The root of the idea is disfigurement and pain. Obviously I don't want to cause my wife any pain, I love her a lot and she's the mother of my children and, beyond that, supports us by going to work each day. But maybe there's something I can do that won't hurt but would make her less attractive like mixing in some sort of hair removal stuff with her shampoo so she starts balding? This wouldn't hurt and I wouldn't have to be dishonest about her food or try to trick her. I think there's something to that.
Okay, I think you don't understand how the female mind works.
When she weighs herself bald, she will see a lower number on the scale. Her confidence will increase. She will simply buy a wig to replace the hair, but she will continue to weigh naked and will see that lower number.... that would just be shooting yourself in the foot.0 -
forget about worrying about how to keep her fat. support her in all the weight she wants to lose. then 'accidentally' trip while carrying a pot of boiling water, spilling it on her and causing enough scarring to make her too ugly for other men to look at. then tell her repeatedly how great her body looks, she'll stay with you forever.
This is disturbing.
OP doesn't want to hurt his wife, he just wants to make sure she stays with him. I imagine he wants to look at her from time to time, as well.
Well, if that's all he wants, I have had great success with duct tape. I just keep my girlfriend taped to the water heater in the basement. I feed her just enough to keep her hot. The hot water heater keeps her warm. She hardly even flinches when I touch her anymore. Heck. She barely resists when we have sex. I think she is just so much happier now that she has gotten used to it.0 -
start buying plus size porn and leaving it around with posty notes flagging the good looking ones.
point out women who are 15 - 20 pounds heavier than her and note how much more attractive they are.
comment about how nice they must feel
she'll either kill you, or change. either way... problem solved0 -
This fascinating topic will be locked down in three...two...0
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forget about worrying about how to keep her fat. support her in all the weight she wants to lose. then 'accidentally' trip while carrying a pot of boiling water, spilling it on her and causing enough scarring to make her too ugly for other men to look at. then tell her repeatedly how great her body looks, she'll stay with you forever.
This is disturbing.
OP doesn't want to hurt his wife, he just wants to make sure she stays with him. I imagine he wants to look at her from time to time, as well.
Well, if that's all he wants, I have had great success with duct tape. I just keep my girlfriend taped to the water heater in the basement. I feed her just enough to keep her hot. The hot water heater keeps her warm. She hardly even flinches when I touch her anymore. Heck. She barely resists when we have sex. I think she is just so much happier now that she has gotten used to it.
yep, its all about the conditioning ;P0 -
Get her into lifting weights. Everyone knows that makes you gain weight.0
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I would put conflicting reports about what food do and do not help with weight loss, that way she won't know what to eat and will quickly become discouraged and confused.
This sounds like a lot of effort, but it's laudably subtle. I like it. It's very passive-aggressive.0 -
forget about worrying about how to keep her fat. support her in all the weight she wants to lose. then 'accidentally' trip while carrying a pot of boiling water, spilling it on her and causing enough scarring to make her too ugly for other men to look at. then tell her repeatedly how great her body looks, she'll stay with you forever.
This is disturbing.
OP doesn't want to hurt his wife, he just wants to make sure she stays with him. I imagine he wants to look at her from time to time, as well.
Well, if that's all he wants, I have had great success with duct tape. I just keep my girlfriend taped to the water heater in the basement. I feed her just enough to keep her hot. The hot water heater keeps her warm. She hardly even flinches when I touch her anymore. Heck. She barely resists when we have sex. I think she is just so much happier now that she has gotten used to it.
you are in so much trouble buster...0 -
My husband has been told by men that his wife is "mmm" and he looks at them at says, "I know."
What does 'mmm' mean?
"mmm" means that his wife tastes like Honey Nut Cheerios. Don't you watch the NBA?
Wait. I thought Campbell's Soup was mmm mmm good.0 -
Okay, I think you don't understand how the female mind works.
Srsly, what guy does?0 -
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life... don't make a fancy woman your wife... from my personal point of view... get an ugly girl to marry you!0
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Stop being a complete D***BAG! If she's getting attention, get over it. You're an insecure pathetic little man who doesn't want anyone to be better than him and wants to dominate his "female". She deserves that attention for her hard work as well as a man that will treat her with the respect she deserves and not try to screw with her life because he isn't getting the attention he wants.
Get out of the forums and off of FitnessPal. This is for serious people who take pride in what they are doing and encourage others, not try to destroy someone who is actually making changes in thier life.0 -
I would put conflicting reports about what food do and do not help with weight loss, that way she won't know what to eat and will quickly become discouraged and confused.
This sounds like a lot of effort, but it's laudably subtle. I like it. It's very passive-aggressive.
Nah google makes it work quite easily. The interwebs are full of good info, hell he could just print some of the threads on mfp about weightloss and that would work.0 -
you are in so much trouble buster...
What'd I do?0 -
Okay, I think you don't understand how the female mind works.
Srsly, what guy does?
Oh hell, I barely understand the female mind, and I have one.0 -
Stop being a complete D***BAG! If she's getting attention, get over it. You're an insecure pathetic little man who doesn't want anyone to be better than him and wants to dominate his "female". She deserves that attention for her hard work as well as a man that will treat her with the respect she deserves and not try to screw with her life because he isn't getting the attention he wants.
Get out of the forums and off of FitnessPal. This is for serious people who take pride in what they are doing and encourage others, not try to destroy someone who is actually making changes in thier life.
Why did you quote "female"? Are you implying that he's actually in a gay relationship?0 -
you are in so much trouble buster...
What'd I do?
nothing... that's why you're in trouble!0 -
Tell her you like the big booty b!tches.
Love it! Yes... do this!0 -
Okay, I think you don't understand how the female mind works.
Srsly, what guy does?
Oh hell, I barely understand the female mind, and I have one.
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:0 -
Okay, I think you don't understand how the female mind works.
Srsly, what guy does?
Oh hell, I barely understand the female mind, and I have one.
Do you keep it in a jar?
That's where I keep mine.0 -
If you want to be happy for the rest of your life... don't make a fancy woman your wife... from my personal point of view... get an ugly girl to marry you!
Love that song!0 -
This has gotten really out of control. I don't know what happened. All I wanted was to protect my marriage and people are calling me d***bags, whatever those are. I HOPE NONE OF YOU EVER HAS TO GO THROUGH THESE TIMES!0
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This has gotten really out of control. I don't know what happened. All I wanted was to protect my marriage and people are calling me d***bags, whatever those are. I HOPE NONE OF YOU EVER HAS TO GO THROUGH THESE TIMES!
Stay strong, mister! No man should have to bear the burden of a hot wife. That's why we're supposed to stay in the kitchen.0 -
Go to the fun fair buy one off the hall of mirrors mirrors of the on eyed snaggle toothed carnie then replace it with the on in she uses she'll thinks she's pilling it on and give up also buy a bumper car won't help you with you're problem but bumper cars are cool
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I can't fathom how stupid some people must be to think the OP is serious and that this isn't just a big joke. Wow.0
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Hello - looking for some help and support. My wife and I have both been losing a lot of weight recently and have been pretty successful counting calories.
I've noticed that she's been getting a lot more "male" attention and it's starting to make me uncomfortable. I'm not the jealous type but does anyone have suggestions for how I can sabotage her weight loss? Like, change the settings on the food scale, or ?
My wife looks great in a bikini and I thoroughly enjoy walking around with her and seeing men smile in her direction.
If this is indeed a legitimate posting, just relax and enjoy her.0 -
Okay, I think you don't understand how the female mind works.
Srsly, what guy does?
Oh hell, I barely understand the female mind, and I have one.
Do you keep it in a jar?
That's where I keep mine.
OK, this made me LOL and now my coworkers are staring at me.
Don't be jealous.0
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