Hubby threw out all my "healthy food".. WTH

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  • nerdyglasses15
    nerdyglasses15 Posts: 29 Member
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    Ew. No thanks. Besides, in adequate proportions, salt is healthy. You need iodized salt to maintain a healthy internal balance. XD
  • NRSPAM
    NRSPAM Posts: 961 Member
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    Wow...where do I start. First I will start off by ignoring the trolls this time. Second. OP, I don't agree with how your hubby acted, but I can understand the frustration. My husband is skinny, as well as my 13 yo. Fortunately for me, he's not big on food. However, he despises vegetables and fruit, and healthy food altogether...except for my healthy snacks, which he always eats. I would have a talk with him and come to an agreement. There are many many healthy recipes out there. You can substitute almost any meal out there by making it healthy, and still taste good. If he wants whole milk, get it for him, and get 2% for you. Get him his soda, and either don't drink it, or get diet soda for yourself. Get him some snacks that you can handle being in the house, something that you're not crazy about. You can put his stuff somewhere that is out of your face, so you don't have to see it. Trust me, that helps, just to have it out of your face. As for salt, let him add it to his own plate, and just don't cook with it. I would imagine that he would like you to be around longer, and look better. My husband complains about me going to workout too, but he will just have to deal with it. When he complains, I just ask him if he would rather me go back to being 210lb's. He says no, but that I've already lost the weight, so I can stop now. I let him know it doesn't work like that. Lol. I have compromised on that a little bit though, too. I used to always go in the mornings when he was home, but now, I switched to evenings most of the time, while he's at work. I'm sure y'all can come to an agreement here. You just need to talk about it. Just stay strong and don't let this change your healthy lifestyle. You are not being selfish for trying to help your family to be more healthy, but at the same time, you have to realize that he doesn't have weight to lose, so he can have some things that you can't. Also, it's ok to eat those things occasionally, so when you do, share them together. Also there are some really good dessert recipes that are low in calories. Check out www.skinnytaste.com or www.emilybites.com they have some really good recipes. Also weightwatchers.com has free recipes. Good luck to you both. you can do this! :)
  • subconscious_ink
    subconscious_ink Posts: 194 Member
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    What we've got here is a failure to communicate.

    Seriously, dude needs to learn how to chill and talk things out like an adult. On the other hand, there were probably signs that he was chafing under the "health food" rule that the OP either didn't notice or ignored. It would freak me out if my significant other suddenly went on a rampage in the kitchen like that.

    Also, am I the only one concerned about the wastefulness? He could have kept the food they already had and just bought whatever he wanted to add to it.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,683 Member
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    Lol, and on my "married men" there were a few women who scoffed when I said "it's easier to conform than try to compromise".:laugh:

    You don't throw food out (unless it's spoiled of course). Since I do the cooking, it's usually going to be food I like to eat, but if my wife requested something she wanted, I'd make it.

    As a trainer, I don't think forcing something on someone really ever works. That's why there usually has to be a desire or consent or else it will usually end up being a waste of time.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • NRSPAM
    NRSPAM Posts: 961 Member
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    Just continue with your goals and believe in yourself. You are on the right path. And I'd have to imagine that you have a friend or another family member that supports you in your quest to be healthy. I'd calmly sit down and ask him what is really bothering him about this whole thing. What does he really fear about all of this? It seems as though his ego is threatened by you living to true yourself. Remember you are worthy of respect and support. Good luck and continue your healthy journey.

    Good point! Spouses are often threatened when the other one wants to lose weight and get in shape. He may feel that OP is trying to look good for someone else. Maybe he caught someone checking her out! Lol. :D
  • Maidofmer
    Maidofmer Posts: 908 Member
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    go buy some wax fruit and a cheese burger. give them both to him and say, the both have the same nutritional value, and make yourself something awesome.
  • ecka723
    ecka723 Posts: 148 Member
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    Let's be fair, Mrs Dash IS disgusting, and regular salt is so much healthier...

    The heck is Mrs. Dash anyways?

    Some seasoning thing. I've never tried it but I've seen the commercials for it. *shrugs*

    Whats wrong with regular salt? I like my regular salt... I get to control how much I put in my food that way...

    Some people need to reduce their salt intake for health reasons. And Mrs. Dash is seasoning blends without salt to help people who are reducing their salt give their foods more flavor. Some of them are actually good, such as the fiesta lime one.
  • kar2083
    kar2083 Posts: 68 Member
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    In all fairness, you're the one who is trying to change your eating habits and you've kind of forced it on him. I'd suggest making some of the things he wants available in the house. Continue to eat healthy yourself and cook healthy. If he chooses to eat crap, so be it. You can only change you.

    not in my house. my husband and kids eat what i cook. im not a waitress. if im eating healthy, they are eating healthy. if my husband doesnt like it, he knows where the door is, and also knows my address to mail his child support payments to :)
    If you re-read my post, I did not say she should be his waitress. I suggested that she continue to eat healthy and COOK healthy.

    i didnt say that you said that. i said in my house, my eating habits WILL BE FORCED ON EVERYONE ELSE, because im not a waitress, and i dont cook to order... i make a meal, and thats it, they can either eat it, or starve. thier choice. that was my point. im not going to buy junk, when im trying to eat healthy. and i dare him to bring junk in to my house...

    LOL! You made my day!
  • symonspatrick
    symonspatrick Posts: 213 Member
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    Buy for your husband the things that he wants and he will be okay with you buying the things for you that you want.
  • Shadowknight137
    Shadowknight137 Posts: 1,243 Member
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    go buy some wax fruit and a cheese burger. give them both to him and say, the both have the same nutritional value, and make yourself something awesome.

    Cheese + Bread + Meat + Pickles = Wax fruit.

    It's science, don't argue.
  • ajourney2beme
    ajourney2beme Posts: 181 Member
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    I've always given my boyfriend the choice of joining me in my eating ways or not. He's a grown man if he wants to eat nachos grande (or w/e it is) then he is more than welcome to go ahead. If he wants something in particular in the store it's HIS money and he can buy what he wants (I'm unemployed atm so all our food comes from him) and cook it. We have never thrown away any of our old food so if he wants rice or peanut butter or w/e else that I'm not eating then he is free to cook some up and eat it. I won't force my eating habits on him and I expect him to not come home and shove a burrito in my face (unless I really wanted one!). At this point in my journey I feel like having junk food in the house would be a really hard hurdle for myself. I didn't tell him he couldn't have any, but if he gets it then he knows not to tell me and to keep it somewhere for himself. We talked about this, communicated.

    You guys had a fight. If he truly did throw away all your 'healthy' items it was probably in the heat of the moment. You guys should talk things out and COMPROMISE.If it is HIS money paying for groceries then he should get a say in what's around the house as well. If this is the route he wants to go, it might cost more money to buy 2 things of milk or other things but he has to realize that this is YOUR health as well. Your health affects your family. Make the way you eat work for your lifestyle if you can't buy what you consider 'diet' food. Buy more vegetables for yourself, buy the tatertots for him (just an example). Have the self control to not eat the tots or work them into your diet. Even talk to him about cooking something like that for himself if you absolutely can't trust yourself.

    Obviously we are only getting one half of the story but if he is truly upset over this than you will ONLY make it worse by going out and restocking all the items he threw away. Communication is such a big thing! You should be talking to him, not us!

    Good luck in whatever you choose to do!
  • Toya2xcel
    Toya2xcel Posts: 107 Member
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    Yeah he def was out of line blowing up like that but he is your husband and you have to live with him, so my suggestion would be talk to him (when he has calmed down of course) and let him know how serious you are about your new life style. Once that is established, maybe talk about food items that he could do without and things that he feels like he must have available in the house for him to eat. And of course you continue buying your healthy stuff and hopefully your grocery bill wont be too ridiculous that way.

    I feel your pain though, my husband is the same as yours, 5'10 155 pounds and there are certain things that he doesn't want to go without food wise (i.e, zebra cakes, sugary cereal, chips and Hawaiian punch, to name a few LOL) I do all the grocery shopping and meal prep, so I buy that stuff for him and get what I want to get for me and that way everybody wins. One good thing that comes out of it is that your will power will be stronger than ever!
  • cassabirdy
    cassabirdy Posts: 4
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    the next thing that would be getting thrown out is him, then I'd slap him with his own shoe and say "I want a better man by the time I get back"

    Made me giggle.

    It's very hard not being supported, but you sound like you have the willpower to keep going! Feel free to add me as a friend and we can support each other.
  • fatalis_vox
    fatalis_vox Posts: 106 Member
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    Yea, this advice wouldn't fly in my house. I pay for the groceries, do most of the grocery shopping, and the majority of the cooking. I buy and cook what I want, although I include things I know he likes. (For instance, buffalo chicken lasagna is lower calorie and one of his favs.) However, if he wants crap and through out my groceries- he would be shopping for himself.

    Off-Topic: Can I get the recipe for that buffalo chicken lasagna??
  • NRSPAM
    NRSPAM Posts: 961 Member
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    Yeah he def was out of line blowing up like that but he is your husband and you have to live with him, so my suggestion would be talk to him (when he has calmed down of course) and let him know how serious you are about your new life style. Once that is established, maybe talk about food items that he could do without and things that he feels like he must have available in the house for him to eat. And of course you continue buying your healthy stuff and hopefully your grocery bill wont be too ridiculous that way.

    I feel your pain though, my husband is the same as yours, 5'10 155 pounds and there are certain things that he doesn't want to go without food wise (i.e, zebra cakes, sugary cereal, chips and Hawaiian punch, to name a few LOL) I do all the grocery shopping and meal prep, so I buy that stuff for him and get what I want to get for me and that way everybody wins. One good thing that comes out of it is that your will power will be stronger than ever!

    Agreed! And there are plenty of diet snacks out there, (I love the smart ones ice cream stuff!). So buy what he wants, and get yourself some diet snacks, so you can both have snacks, and you won't feel deprived!
  • Food4Fuel
    Food4Fuel Posts: 37 Member
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    In all fairness, you're the one who is trying to change your eating habits and you've kind of forced it on him. I'd suggest making some of the things he wants available in the house. Continue to eat healthy yourself and cook healthy. If he chooses to eat crap, so be it. You can only change you.

    not in my house. my husband and kids eat what i cook. im not a waitress. if im eating healthy, they are eating healthy. if my husband doesnt like it, he knows where the door is, and also knows my address to mail his child support payments to :)
    I just gave my fiancé a big hug, kissed her right on the mouth because I'm so glad she's not as self absorbed as you
  • CorvusCorax77
    CorvusCorax77 Posts: 2,536 Member
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    In all fairness, you're the one who is trying to change your eating habits and you've kind of forced it on him. I'd suggest making some of the things he wants available in the house. Continue to eat healthy yourself and cook healthy. If he chooses to eat crap, so be it. You can only change you.

    This. When I was a kid, if my dad went on a diet, the whole family did & that's not fair or healthy. I don't see why you and he can't eat differently. My house has meat eaters, vegetarians, vegans, and allergy issues and we work it out with no drama. I am sure you can too.
  • naayden
    naayden Posts: 9
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    I would like to thank everyone for their support and constructive criticism. Like I said this was a vent, yes there are two sides to a story will I be broadcasting them here. Um I think not, if you read the title carefully it said my healthy food. Therefore it was mine. Unfortunately my husband is too lazy to fix or buy his own meals. I didn't put a gun to his head nor did I force to eat what I made. Some people hit it on the noise on why my husband act the way he did. Yes there should have been a comprise. I can admit to that. To address the person mention about me being unemployed yes I am no shame here life happens. But just because I'm unemployed doesn't entitles me to be a maid or personal chef and for the record I can afford my own food. Also I'm new here so I don't know much about what threads are trending here thanks for the heads up. All in all thanks for taking your time to comment and read my post. I hope everyone the best in reaching their goals!!
  • Funsoaps
    Funsoaps Posts: 514 Member
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    You should be ale to eat what you want but if he's not wanting to be healthy then he can have full fat milk, just buy two, his food and yours I guess. My son and I are dairy and gluten free but I still buy wheat bread and milk for my daughter and hubby because they choose to not be gluten free....it works. But if I make a meal, it gluten and dairy free and if they don't want to eat it then they can go make a sandwich. Lucky for me my hubby loves healthy food and wouldnt take even a bite of nachos.
  • Mcgrawhaha
    Mcgrawhaha Posts: 1,596 Member
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    In all fairness, you're the one who is trying to change your eating habits and you've kind of forced it on him. I'd suggest making some of the things he wants available in the house. Continue to eat healthy yourself and cook healthy. If he chooses to eat crap, so be it. You can only change you.

    not in my house. my husband and kids eat what i cook. im not a waitress. if im eating healthy, they are eating healthy. if my husband doesnt like it, he knows where the door is, and also knows my address to mail his child support payments to :)
    I just gave my fiancé a big hug, kissed her right on the mouth because I'm so glad she's not as self absorbed as you

    great! im glad i could help! listen, ive got 5 kids under the age of 14, one with a serious medical condition that causes me alot of time at the dr and hospitals. im a full time college student, and active with my 4 daughters softball teams. i have no time for a whiney husband who wants to complain about the food i buy or cook. luckily, i dont have this problem, because in my house (and yes, this is my house, this is the house i grew up in, which is in mine and my mothers name ONLY) im in charge, i run it, i manage it, and he complies; he has found its easier that way. if it works for us, thats all that matters. he eats what i cook, and he doesnt complain. my response was in reaction to the op's husband acting like a *kitten*. so, you can thank your lucky stars that your not married to someone like me, but believe me, in my husbands eyes, with all i do, with all i have on my plate, and everything i go through with my children, he thanks his lucky stars that he has me :) i dont have time for any bull*** and he knws it, thats why i say, he wouldnt dare. its not about being self absorbed, its about appreciating that im doing whats best for this family (healthy food) with the time i have available.

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