Vicious circle I call life

Breaking up a home with kids will not make it easier. It will bring in a whole new level of complication. For the sake of your children, please get some counseling. It is vital that you learn to re-connect if you're ever going to make a life for your children to model their own lives after. Please don't walk away without trying... your children deserve to have their mom and their dad all the time... not 50/50. I say this as a step-mom. Please. Try to fix it. You can't necessarily change him, but you can change you. Talk to him. Be bold. Ask him what he would like to see change... and consider what he says.

Edited because I sounded like a jerk. Sorry.

Get out while you can. You are beautiful and intellegent. Don't wait another minute. Take those kids and disapear. Good luck ,dump the loser.

"Do you love him or is it just fear of the unknown that makes you stay??"

^^^ This. Best question you will EVER answer for yourself (and you can swap a hell of a lot in place of "do you love him".

There's no advice I can give you for your situation, but I sincerely hope you discover the answer quickly and begin taking whatever steps are neccesary for you to be happy.

I'm a bit confused by the OP. You're bored with what amounts to the normal nights of people that are married with kids. ...but one of your complaints is that you don't have a ring? How would jewelry make this better? If you're ready to bolt why add paperwork?

If you want to stay stop waiting for excitement to miraculously descend from the heavens and plan an interesting evening for the 2 of you. Or the 5 of you.

I'm a bit confused by the OP. You're bored with what amounts to the normal nights of people that are married with kids. ...but one of your complaints is that you don't have a ring? How would jewelry make this better? If you're ready to bolt why add paperwork?

If you want to stay stop waiting for excitement to miraculously descend from the heavens and plan an interesting evening for the 2 of you. Or the 5 of you.

or the one of you... seriously you don't need him to change for you to change your life. If he's doing nothing anyway leave the kids with him and go. do. something....

I don't think advice from internet strangers will really help your situation. We can all tell you about our life experiences, or give you our opinion but at the end of the day, it's your reality, you live it every day. Talk to someone who knows you both, they will be able to give you better advice.

I was in almost an identical situation (except with me, it was 5 years and 1 kid). He even proposed after 3 years and then felt it was okay to keep the engagement as long as possible so he wouldn't have to take the plunge. I didn't even want to get married but he convinced me and then never went through with it!

When our baby was born, things were different for a few months but then it went back to ignoring each other, him playing xbox, me on my iPad. Our baby was the only thing that kept us together, and then I realised I didn't want my child growing up in an unhappy home. I would rather she has two homes with single parents that are both happy about life. So, I tried again with him. We tried to make date nights but that didn't really work as he was never really interested. Again, he would convince me to do them and then moan about traffic and money, etc. He never wanted to get involved with my family, and we never had sex anymore. He never talked about his feelings, ever! Eventually I gave up, packed my bags and left.

And to be honest, we are so much more happier now. My daughter goes and visits with him on Wednesdays and every other weekend. She lives with me for the rest of the time. And she gets to experience so much more because of it. And she gets spoilt loads haha. It's been 7 months since we split up and we are so much better for it. We are still good friends, we keep in touch because of our daughter, we keep the topics strictly to her and studies though, I'm not sure I ever want to know what he gets up to with other women. And then when the time comes when and if we get serious about someone else, we will have a get together to meet up with them, seeing as that person would be spending a lot of time with my daughter. Other than that, we go about our separate lives.

It's not all fun and games though. Sometimes I get lonely, not so much anymore, every day I get stronger, but there are still days when I miss him immensely and wonder if I did the right thing. But then I think about how much my life and his life have changed and how we would make each other miserable again, some people just aren't compatible. It is difficult being a single mom, as it is difficult for him to be a single dad, I am lucky enough to have a good supportive family, and not to mention my daughter's dad is wonderful with her so someone will take her if I am having a particularly bad day which doesn't happen often, but it's nice to know it's there.

Sorry, turned into an essay. This is just how my life has turned out, I can't tell you what the right and wrong answer is though. It depends on you and him. I know how difficult it is to talk to a partner who doesn't pay any attention to you and who doesn't like talking to you either. What helped me was trying to see where I went wrong too. As much as we don't like to admit it, 90% of the time we are at fault just as much as our partners are. I know when I fell pregnant, I was so angry with the world because I had immense morning sickness (or all day sickness as they fail to tell you lol), I never went out because every smell made me sick, I didn't have sex with him, I went to bed as soon as I got back from work, and so he turned to the xbox to keep himself entertained. For some reason, he felt he couldn't go out and that he was being supportive by being at home with me (even if it meant that he was playing xbox in the lounge and we never spoke). Once I knew what I had done, I tried to make it right but I think we both left it too late. Communication is such a big key in a relationship and ours had none of it unfortunately. That was our major downfall.

Anyway, I hope that this helps you in some way. In my opinion, t is always best to try your absolute hardest to make a relationship work, especially when there are kids involved. But don't beat yourself up about it if it doesn't work out and don't feel like you need to be dependant on anyone. That's what I did and it broke my confidence down so bad. Even now I am struggling to get it back together.

Good luck with your decision, whatever you choose, and sorry again for the essay lol. x

One day a man was walking down the street on his way to work. As he walked down the street, there were dogs on just about every front porch and they all would bark as the man walked passed them. However, there was one dog that he remembered, because this dog was just sitting there and he was whimpering and whining and moaning, you know the little whimpering sounds dogs make when they are wounded or in some sort of pain. Well this particular dog was just sitting there on the front porch making those sounds.
The man was curious as to why this dog wasn't barking like the other dogs and why he was whimpering. He couldn't figure it out, so he just kept walking to work. The next day he was in the same situation where he was walking down the street and saw the dogs once again and this same dog that was moaning and groaning the other day was doing the same thing today and he just couldn't figure it out. Well, he walked past for an entire week and every day the dog would be there moaning and groaning. So, finally, the guy got fed up, he said "let me find out what's going on."
So he went and knocked on the door and a guy came out and said, "Yes, how may I help you?" He said, "Sir, is this your dog?" "Yes, that's my dog." "Well, what's wrong with him?" The owner of the dog said, "What do you mean?" "Well, he's been sitting here moaning and groaning, whimpering and whining for an entire week. The rest of the dogs are barking, your dog should be barking too, why is he moaning and groaning?"
The owner said, "Well, he's actually sitting on a nail." He said, "What! Your dog is sitting on a nail. Why doesn't he get off?" "Well, it just doesn't hurt him enough."

I'm a bit confused by the OP. You're bored with what amounts to the normal nights of people that are married with kids. ...but one of your complaints is that you don't have a ring? How would jewelry make this better? If you're ready to bolt why add paperwork?

If you want to stay stop waiting for excitement to miraculously descend from the heavens and plan an interesting evening for the 2 of you. Or the 5 of you.

This.

It takes 2 to make a relationship work, simple .
If one isn't prepared to put the same effort in then its time to move on to someone who will
I hope he bucks his ideas up ,or you are brave enough to move on
which ever comes first you will be much happier