When is it time to lock up a drug user??

For me it depends on the drug being used...

I'd be lenient on a pot smoker...but anything else really, get 'em off the street!

Only violent people should be locked up, whether or not they ever use drugs or alcohol. Non-violent people should not be in cages.

i agree with this. there are too many people in jail on drug charges. if he was violent, of course put him in the system. otherwise, his family needs to draw some boundaries.

I have got to chime in here. Everyone says that a family member needs to stop enabling the user and cut ties to spare themselves the emotional toll.
But, I need to say that maybe the real answer isn't that simple.
I was a heavy substance abuser when I was younger. I turned 18 years old in juvenile detention. Since I turned 18, they were going to spring me with credit for time served. There was a hearing before a judge and my parents attended. The judge reviewed my record, and turned to my parents, and told them: "You need to just write this kid off and throw him out of your lives. He's got a bad track record. I have seen this. If you don't, he is just going to keep screwing up and he is going to keep hurting you. He is going to be in the adult jail in less than a year. You cannot help him anyway."
My parents walked out of that hearing without me, and drove away. I slept in the park.
Well, my mother's resolve lasted about two weeks, not much longer. She poured some coffee in a thermos and drove down to the park to see me. She was not weakening completely. But she just couldn't take not knowing anything. She thought we would have a cup of coffee and a conversation.
I was not there. My friends told my mother that I had been arrested, again, and I was in the county jail. She went to my arraignment.
To make a long story short, when I got out, my parents relented, and I moved home. As I was still facing charges, I got a job and resolved to clean up my act, at least until my sentencing, so it would look like I was trying and the court would be more likely to be lenient.
Course, I wasn't going to give up getting high completely. But I was going to limit myself to just speed and pot. I told myself it was the other things that got me in trouble -- alcohol, in particular. But, speed and pot I could handle, and they would help me on the job.
It did not work. I ended up smashed every night and I almost got arrested a couple of times, for being with the wrong people.
I have to say, before I moved home, I was destitute. I could not quit and I knew it. I had absolutely no hope, and I had no aspirations because I knew I could never fulfill them. I would not have minded dying. I could not care about myself anymore because it just hurt too much. So, I stopped.
But, when I moved home, my mother used to wait up for me to come in at night, usually very late. Invariably, I was drunk and high and miserable. And, we had conversations. Long conversations. Teary conversations. Quiet conversations at the kitchen table with the rest of the house dark. She wasn't trying to scold me anymore, or admonish me, or anything. I was just her son and she had to know. So I told her, everything, holding very little back.
And, a funny thing happened.
In the process of being honest and talking, in the process of seeing that she still cared, no matter what, I began to care about myself again, and that opened me up. In a few months, I made it to drug treatment. I would not have gone if I had not started to care again. I would not have tried.
That was over 30 years ago. I have been sober ever since.
I cannot advise somebody on what to do. Nobody knows better than I do about how few serious addicts and users are able to clean up. I think I know the pain and disruption they cause.
But, maybe . . . maybe, it is not always as simple as just saying goodbye to someone, with the rationalization that it is for their own good.

My brother was a hardcore meth addict, he stole from us, treated us like crap, totaled my dad's truck, and even threatened to beat me up with a baseball bat. (All because I wouldn't GIVE, not let him borrow, but actually let him have my car.) My brother was a lot older than me, and my parents both worked all day, plus my mom was going to school.

I broke ties with him long ago, he hadn't been in my life much since I was young, and when we were young he would tell me to try is cigarettes, let his nasty friends come around (and trust me they didn't belong around any kids let alone young girls) and sometimes just left me completely alone when he was babysitting (didn't happen often)... He finally landed himself in prison, and honestly it's been the best thing for him. However, he is due out in March, and he is already acting up. I'm not sure prison alone will help after all now, and I wish he could get some serious treatment.


To be honest, if he so much as takes one wrong step I'll be ready to drop him. I don't even care if that sounds cruel, he has had so many chances, the only reason I gave him this one is because he was forced to be clean.

I have got to chime in here. Everyone says that a family member needs to stop enabling the user and cut ties to spare themselves the emotional toll.
But, I need to say that maybe the real answer isn't that simple.
I was a heavy substance abuser when I was younger. I turned 18 years old in juvenile detention. Since I turned 18, they were going to spring me with credit for time served. There was a hearing before a judge and my parents attended. The judge reviewed my record, and turned to my parents, and told them: "You need to just write this kid off and throw him out of your lives. He's got a bad track record. I have seen this. If you don't, he is just going to keep screwing up and he is going to keep hurting you. He is going to be in the adult jail in less than a year. You cannot help him anyway."
My parents walked out of that hearing without me, and drove away. I slept in the park.
Well, my mother's resolve lasted about two weeks, not much longer. She poured some coffee in a thermos and drove down to the park to see me. She was not weakening completely. But she just couldn't take not knowing anything. She thought we would have a cup of coffee and a conversation.
I was not there. My friends told my mother that I had been arrested, again, and I was in the county jail. She went to my arraignment.
To make a long story short, when I got out, my parents relented, and I moved home. As I was still facing charges, I got a job and resolved to clean up my act, at least until my sentencing, so it would look like I was trying and the court would be more likely to be lenient.
Course, I wasn't going to give up getting high completely. But I was going to limit myself to just speed and pot. I told myself it was the other things that got me in trouble -- alcohol, in particular. But, speed and pot I could handle, and they would help me on the job.
It did not work. I ended up smashed every night and I almost got arrested a couple of times, for being with the wrong people.
I have to say, before I moved home, I was destitute. I could not quit and I knew it. I had absolutely no hope, and I had no aspirations because I knew I could never fulfill them. I would not have minded dying. I could not care about myself anymore because it just hurt too much. So, I stopped.
But, when I moved home, my mother used to wait up for me to come in at night, usually very late. Invariably, I was drunk and high and miserable. And, we had conversations. Long conversations. Teary conversations. Quiet conversations at the kitchen table with the rest of the house dark. She wasn't trying to scold me anymore, or admonish me, or anything. I was just her son and she had to know. So I told her, everything, holding very little back.
And, a funny thing happened.
In the process of being honest and talking, in the process of seeing that she still cared, no matter what, I began to care about myself again, and that opened me up. In a few months, I made it to drug treatment. I would not have gone if I had not started to care again. I would not have tried.
That was over 30 years ago. I have been sober ever since.
I cannot advise somebody on what to do. Nobody knows better than I do about how few serious addicts and users are able to clean up. I think I know the pain and disruption they cause.
But, maybe . . . maybe, it is not always as simple as just saying goodbye to someone, with the rationalization that it is for their own good.

This brought tears to my eyes!
My husband is an addict, clean and sober going on 3 years now & this is not his 1st stretch of sobriety. Through out our 8 year marriage there were times that things got really nasty. He has stolen from me, our kids, family members and strangers. Although he was never physically violent there were times that I feared for our safety. I enabled, I tried tough love, I left him and took him back; several times. Most importantly though I stood by him and loved him. There is no doubt in either of our minds if I had taken our children and completely shut the door he would have ended up killing himself. We (our kids and I) are not the reason he stopped but we did give him a reason to want to stop.
There is no one size fits all answer to this. Every addict has their own personal bottom and the only way to know what that is is for them to hit it.