Dating & dieting?

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13

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  • UrbanLotus
    UrbanLotus Posts: 1,163 Member
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    I just started dating a new guy and it can be tough. If I know the restaurant we are going to before hand I try to plan out a low calorie meal! I also mentioned that I like to eat healthy (I didn't say I was trying to loose weight) and he responded well to it. I know to limit my portions at restaurants- It is ok not to eat the entire meal! Also, when I go out for drinks I limit myself to one and am contious about what I order and the calories in it. Doing my homework before hand is what helps me out the most!

    Good Luck!

    This is great advice, I'll just say i'm trying to be healthy and leave it at that :)

    Eeek I'm not a scotch or beer drinker - I'm not big into drinking at all, pretty much just wine. Shots at a club on occasion lol. I think i will have one glass of wine since we are going to a new wine bar I wanted to try. maybe I'll get my first workout in tomorrow to make up for it!
  • jensnewstart
    jensnewstart Posts: 97 Member
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    Change the attitude, you are doing this for YOU. I started dating someone new, the one who says "you are fine the way you are" :huh: No, I am not fine, I WILL stay on track and I will continue to lose. A few bevvies don't hurt as long as you fit them into your intake, if I know we have a date....I'll save room. Snacks? Share something, that's romantic :love: That way you're not scarfing down a whole plate of something......

    It can be done, stay true to YOU!! :flowerforyou:
  • juliemouse83
    juliemouse83 Posts: 6,663 Member
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    I just started dating a new guy and it can be tough. If I know the restaurant we are going to before hand I try to plan out a low calorie meal! I also mentioned that I like to eat healthy (I didn't say I was trying to loose weight) and he responded well to it. I know to limit my portions at restaurants- It is ok not to eat the entire meal! Also, when I go out for drinks I limit myself to one and am contious about what I order and the calories in it. Doing my homework before hand is what helps me out the most!

    Good Luck!

    This is great advice, I'll just say i'm trying to be healthy and leave it at that :)

    Eeek I'm not a scotch or beer drinker - I'm not big into drinking at all, pretty much just wine. Shots at a club on occasion lol. I think i will have one glass of wine since we are going to a new wine bar I wanted to try. maybe I'll get my first workout in tomorrow to make up for it!

    Ahhhh, wine!!!! My personal favorite. Go, have fun...ENJOY!
  • UrbanLotus
    UrbanLotus Posts: 1,163 Member
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    Doesn't sound like your diet is going to work if you're going to be that ridged. It sounds so ridged that date or not you couldn't stick to it. A diet should be a lifestyle change.

    Its not rigid, its working fine for me. I have been "dieting" all my life, this IS a lifestyle change - and part of my normal lifestyle has *always* been not being a big drinker because I don't like it. I was asking for advice on this specific issue, not judgment on my diet so please leave that out.
  • EmilyOfTheSun
    EmilyOfTheSun Posts: 1,548 Member
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    Review the menu before you go so that you can pick something that fits into your goals.

    If you have a special event on certain days when you know you'll be eating/drinking more than normal, get in an extra workout that day so you can consume more calories and not have it affect your weight loss.
  • mommyshortlegs
    mommyshortlegs Posts: 402 Member
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    Unless you're dating every night, I don't see the harm in the occasional splurge. That's the difference between a diet and a lifestyle.
  • strikerjb007
    strikerjb007 Posts: 443 Member
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    Newsflash: If dating and leading a healthy life is a problem, the problem is not the DATING. It's you. Saying you can't have both is just an excuse to get off the wagon.

    Now go out there and have fun and stay within your goals.
  • BigBrewski
    BigBrewski Posts: 922 Member
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    Just date me, I'll understand and be supportive :)
  • skinnyforhi
    skinnyforhi Posts: 340 Member
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    If you don't really drink, just order one drink that you like and nurse it. It's a first date so you should only have one drink anyway (I am presuming you don't really know this person yet).

    And you don't have to explain yourself at all. It's nobody's business that you are trying to lose weight. You don't have to make any apologies, excuses, or explanations for anything that you do or don't eat. If someone else has an issue with it, that's on them.

    A first date is so exciting--relax and have fun!!!
  • UrbanLotus
    UrbanLotus Posts: 1,163 Member
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    Newsflash: If dating and leading a healthy life is a problem, the problem is not the DATING. It's you. Saying you can't have both is just an excuse to get off the wagon.

    Now go out there and have fun and stay within your goals.

    Did I miss something here? I never said I can't have both, and I never said I wanted to get off the wagon nor was I looking for an excuse to get off.
  • redraidergirl2009
    redraidergirl2009 Posts: 2,560 Member
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    Doesn't sound like your diet is going to work if you're going to be that ridged. It sounds so ridged that date or not you couldn't stick to it. A diet should be a lifestyle change.

    Its not rigid, its working fine for me. I have been "dieting" all my life, this IS a lifestyle change - and part of my normal lifestyle has *always* been not being a big drinker because I don't like it. I was asking for advice on this specific issue, not judgment on my diet so please leave that out.

    Then why would you agree to go to drinks if you're not a fan /facepalm
  • UrbanLotus
    UrbanLotus Posts: 1,163 Member
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    Because I am a social person and I go out with my friends for "drinks" all the time - they drink, I don't. Why are you getting on my case?
  • jennamt87
    jennamt87 Posts: 17 Member
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    I don't think there's a need to draw attention to it, so no need to explain to someone you've just met your diet and weight loss plan.

    Plus, there are plenty of lower calorie drink options if you so choose, such as light beer, vodka with club soda or tonic water, a glass of white wine, etc. Also, I agree with others who have said that a first date is no time to drink heavily anyway. Limit yourself to one drink, order a healthy meal, and hope for a second date!
  • 1ConcreteGirl
    1ConcreteGirl Posts: 3,677 Member
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    Because I am a social person and I go out with my friends for "drinks" all the time - they drink, I don't. Why are you getting on my case?

    Nobody is "getting on your case." They're asking logical questions.

    I agree that it would be odd to agree to go to drinks with someone and not tell them you don't plan to drink. When you were invited, you might have been more comfortable saying, "I'm not a big drinker, what about coffee?" Saves you this whole thread.
  • tinamartinson
    tinamartinson Posts: 13 Member
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    This is timely for me as I think about getting back out there.

    I've found with my new eating habits I'm kind of a buzz-kill at dinner. I don't drink so I never worry about that. But, I sometimes feel pressure to "just eat" or "live a little" when out with friends because I'm reflexively more cautious about the foods I'll order and they don't understand. What if my date is the same?

    I know it is silly to be anxious over something that hasn't even happened yet but it is part of who I am. I worry. LOL!

    So much of my new life is wrapped up in controlling my foods. I guess I need to date someone who will appreciate and support that. And planning ahead. Picking a locale that has options to support eating habits as well seem reasonable.
  • UrbanLotus
    UrbanLotus Posts: 1,163 Member
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    Nobody is "getting on your case." They're asking logical questions.

    I agree that it would be odd to agree to go to drinks with someone and not tell them you don't plan to drink. When you were invited, you might have been more comfortable saying, "I'm not a big drinker, what about coffee?" Saves you this whole thread.

    I am a social person and I go out with my friends for "drinks" all the time - they drink, I don't. Its not a big deal, I'd rather hang out at a bar than a coffeeshop, especially on a Saturday night. Have I explained myself to your satisfaction?
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,874 Member
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    If I was a guy and I was going on a first date with a girl to a wine bar or any other bar, and she didn't drink, I'd feel pretty awkward. I don't like to drink alone and there's really no other reason for me to be at a wine bar other than to drink wine. I certainly wouldn't condemn you if you said you weren't a really big drinker, but if we were sitting there and I had a couple glasses of wine and you were sipping on water or diet coke I would most certainly wonder what they hell we were doing in a wine bar when we could have just as easily done something else that didn't leave me hangin' here drinking wine by myself.

    If you're going to a wine bar have a couple glasses of wine...not going to kill you. I regularly indulge in adult beverages and it hasn't derailed me in the least...25 Lbs down since mid October. If you really don't want to drink anything, I'd recommend a change of venue.
  • UrbanLotus
    UrbanLotus Posts: 1,163 Member
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    If I was a guy and I was going on a first date with a girl to a wine bar or any other bar, and she didn't drink, I'd feel pretty awkward. I don't like to drink alone and there's really no other reason for me to be at a wine bar other than to drink wine. I certainly wouldn't condemn you if you said you weren't a really big drinker, but if we were sitting there and I had a couple glasses of wine and you were sipping on water or diet coke I would most certainly wonder what they hell we were doing in a wine bar when we could have just as easily done something else that didn't leave me hangin' here drinking wine by myself.

    If you're going to a wine bar have a couple glasses of wine...not going to kill you. I regularly indulge in adult beverages and it hasn't derailed me in the least...25 Lbs down since mid October. If you really don't want to drink anything, I'd recommend a change of venue.

    Thanks for your input, I'll have a glass of wine
  • fishsticks913
    fishsticks913 Posts: 123 Member
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    I love this topic.... cause it is exactly where I am right now.. and I will admit it is not easy. But in all reality...the gentleman I have been dating for the last 12 week (insert high school giggle right here :) ) is an amazing person who understands all this dieting things and will help me with it all. he is not rude or make comments about what I am eating if I have made a "bad" choice... he just encourages me to make better choices.

    It is sometimes discouraging when he wants to go tothe gym and I want to do something else... BUT.. with all due respect.... He goes to the gym and i would not change that. He has to maintain himself as I have to maintain me.

    I would say... be totally up front and honest with him and tell him that you are with in a "life style change" and are going to keep at it!
  • peejay34mason
    peejay34mason Posts: 138 Member
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    If I was a guy and I was going on a first date with a girl to a wine bar or any other bar, and she didn't drink, I'd feel pretty awkward. I don't like to drink alone and there's really no other reason for me to be at a wine bar other than to drink wine. I certainly wouldn't condemn you if you said you weren't a really big drinker, but if we were sitting there and I had a couple glasses of wine and you were sipping on water or diet coke I would most certainly wonder what they hell we were doing in a wine bar when we could have just as easily done something else that didn't leave me hangin' here drinking wine by myself.

    If you're going to a wine bar have a couple glasses of wine...not going to kill you. I regularly indulge in adult beverages and it hasn't derailed me in the least...25 Lbs down since mid October. If you really don't want to drink anything, I'd recommend a change of venue.

    Thanks for your input, I'll have a glass of wine

    If you do not want to have an alcholic drink then by ALL means do NOT have an alcoholic drink. There is no rule, written or unwritten in dating, that necessitates alcohol - even if you did agree to meet for drinks. Last I checked water and soda are liquids and can be drank as well.

    Be yourself, be comfortable and most importantly be true to YOURSELF!

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