Share mother in law horror stories!!

Okay, where to start...
Mine tried twice to kidnap my daughter out of daycare.
Mine said, regarding my husband "He always had such a big penis when he was a child, is it still big? Is he good in bed? I always thought he'd be good in bed."
Mine bought me a ridiculously cheap and sleazy teddy to wear on my wedding night and said "I know my sons taste, trust me he'll like this."
Mine used to work as a prostitute, and would have sex on the kitchen table right in front of her kids.

She's a freaking lunatic. I'm pretty much not surprised my husband's kind of screwed up.

WTF?! yikes!!!!

Okay, where to start...
Mine tried twice to kidnap my daughter out of daycare.
Mine said, regarding my husband "He always had such a big penis when he was a child, is it still big? Is he good in bed? I always thought he'd be good in bed."
Mine bought me a ridiculously cheap and sleazy teddy to wear on my wedding night and said "I know my sons taste, trust me he'll like this."
Mine used to work as a prostitute, and would have sex on the kitchen table right in front of her kids.

She's a freaking lunatic. I'm pretty much not surprised my husband's kind of screwed up.

WTF?! yikes!!!!

and in the same vein as your post- she also told my husband (just before the wedding) that he needed to break up with me, because she found out I used to weigh almost 300 pounds. She said "if she was fat before, she'll get fat again, and she'll probably have fat kids, and I don't want fat grandchildren." She is the devil.

Mine likes to ask incredibly personal, probing questions....pretends to be on my side even going so far as to tell her son to quit being lazy or doing whatever he is doing. Then picking a fight about whatever I was unhappy about. Just this weekend, my hunny went to her house to visit and have home with 2 large bags of candy, chips and junk food. Everyone knows I don't allow that food in my house. He wasn't going to tell her know. And I've had very thorough talks with her about step-daughters ballooning weight as of late....and they feed her candy and send home bags of it. Lovely.

mine is pretty cool, tho she worries about everything, and complains a lot..i like her and my FIL tho..there was a point where she was basically telling me in every convo i had with her, that my hubby, her son, and i were losers, and not going to be as good as her other sons, so after years of holding back, i told her if she keeps saying that about us, she needs to get the hell out of my house, and that we would never speak to her ever again, and she is being a hypocrite, and doing the exact same thing as she THINKS i do to my kids (she thought because i called them nerds and dork when they acted goofy, i was putting them down) that was like 3 years ago, and never, NEVER has she ever said anything to that extent again :drinker: i have a way of shutting people up

Proof, I already posted about mine.
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/865981-how-many-mother-in-laws-are-evil

My wife likes my mother more than her own.
She is crazy, narcissistic and yells at everyone.
If she died, my wife would be sad, but relieved.
My sister in law's husband got drunk on Christmas just because he had to deal with her all day.
Admittedly she is a good cook, but will criticize everything anyone else cook, what they should have done differently.

She's still breathing!

My ex-MIL-to be was a horror.
It started off really well, we got along, joking and friendly.
A couple of months after ex and I got together, his mum gave me a key to the house, stating I could only use it if I was at their house and there was no-one to let me in. I never abused this, and never let myself in without knocking to be let in. I never had to use the key.
Then one day, she rounded on me and demanded the key back, saying she didn't feel comfortable with me being able to let myself in as and when I felt like it. Taken aback, I did as I was told, feeling horribly embarrassed and ashamed, and I hadn't even done anything.

Shortly after, she found out ex (sorry, he doesn't deserve to even be named any other than that) had been self harming, and called me into the kitchen after he had left for work (I had stayed over the night). She blamed me for it, saying that he never used to do it before he met me. I argued my case, saying yes, I did know he self harmed, but that he had done it long before he met me.

After a few months, ex lost his drivers licence from speeding, and despite not being in the car with him, I somehow clocked the blame for that.
We moved in together after 6 months, into a place that was solely ours. His family helped out by getting us the usual moving in stuff.

I'd like to point out at this time, I was working and suffering horrible anxiety. I had found out some very disturbing news about ex, and it really affected me.

So we moved in, and after we got the internet set up, he began to get emails from his mother, calling me lazy, and nasty names. Saying I was only with him for money (though he had none, so I don't know where she got that from, because he couldn't control how he spent his money), that I was taking him for a ride, that I just wanted him to put a roof over my head.

This carried on for months. She would email him on a near daily basis. Telling him to leave me, or the family would disown him. Disowning him and then phoning up a week later like nothing had ever happened. Saying the nastiest things about him and us, and never apologising for them. Turning his grandparents against him and me.

I did so much for him, the best thing being teaching him to stick up for himself against her constant attacks.
I bailed him out of debt within the first few months of us being together, that should have been a warning for things to come, but silly me, being young and 'in love'. When it got to the point he was maxing out credit cards to get tattooed or get festival tickets, then taking out a mulitple thousands of pounds loan to consolidate and then using that to buy more concert tickets, things really got bad.

I tried budgeting for him, but his mum acted like I was the one frittering his money away. The whole time we were together, things were so bad, I remember this so clearly, because it speaks volumes about how bad things were. The one thing I bought myself as a treat, was a £5 t-shirt. FIVE POUNDS all to myself was a treat. I still have it now, I kept it as a reminder and funnily enough, it has the words "Never Forgive, Never Forget" written on it. One t-shirt against the hundreds of DVDs, games, CDs and constant other **** he would buy.

Mother in law horror? Yes indeed. It was so bad, it's permanently marred relationships with boyfriends parents I've had since him (we broke up about 8 years ago now and he still tries his best to ruin my life even now, the loser)

Mine lives next door. Enough said ...