I don't want to be "that girl".

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NYCNika
NYCNika Posts: 611 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
You know, the one that keeps going on about calories and diet when out with friends for dinner. I used to find it incredibly annoying, and now that I am making this progress and am pretty obsessed with fitness, eating right and all that, it will be tough.

I need to go out, eat whatever I will be eating, have a drink and NOT talk about any of this stuff unless asked a specific question. This Sat. going out to a restaurant that is less than healthy (hot pot) with a bunch of people and it will be a challenge. My goal is to look like I'm not trying at all, like I'm my old careless self.
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Replies

  • kimberly728
    kimberly728 Posts: 124
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    When I know I'm going out an where I am going, I check out the menu online before hand, and kind of plan out what i will eat. then for that day since i have an aprrox count for what i will need that night, I plan the rest of the day around that. lighter lunch, exercise in the am, whatever it takes to make sure i dont go over.
  • krrs1980
    krrs1980 Posts: 90 Member
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    But...friends and family should be supportive too though.. I know what you're saying because I find that I'm constantly talking about this as well. If it's a big part of your life now, then of course it will come up. I do it a lot because it's what I have going on and it's important to me.
  • morticiamom
    morticiamom Posts: 221 Member
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    I wish more restaurants would post their nutritional information on line. I always feel like a big dork asking for the 'nutritional menu'. At one local restaurant it's a freaking BINDER!
  • Kaypix
    Kaypix Posts: 72 Member
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    See if they will fax a copy of it to you or ask them if they have a digital version, you might be surprised. Once you have the nutritional info, scan it (or save it) to a PDF and either put it online or email it to yourself and download it to your smartphone. All my "regulars" are on my blog, which I manage from my phone (when on the go) so I have all my favorite places PDF's already there.
  • NYCNika
    NYCNika Posts: 611 Member
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    It is not the kind of place that has nutritional menu. It is Chinese hot pot. You get broth in a boiling pot (has good amount of fat in it) and than order raw stuff to put in to it and all of it is shared by your table. So other people order what they want at the table and no way to avoid fatty (and very delicious broth) that everything must be cooked in. But that is not the difficult part -- the tough part is having no clue how many calories is in it.

    Same with other Chinese restaurants. Who can tell how many calories are in the hand pulled noodle with cumin lamb all in hot chili oil? No idea. A lot.

    As far as support goes. My husband hears me talk about it all the time. Closest friends know. But friends that are not that close should not be subjected to this at dinner.
  • BarackMeLikeAHurricane
    BarackMeLikeAHurricane Posts: 3,400 Member
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    I only order things I know I can safely estimate. Usually just a salad with no dressing or croutons--so basically just lettuce and a few slices of onions and cucumber. Even if I estimate the lettuce to be two cups and it's really three, that's a pretty negligible amount of calories. Fruit is also a pretty safe bet. Restaurants like Denny's, IHOP, Waffle House, etc. have fruit as a side on the menu. You can also order steamed veggies.

    TL; DR: order simple things you can safely estimate.
  • Erisad
    Erisad Posts: 1,580
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    I have a hard time with this and some folks say I have "harshed their buzz" with my talk of calories and fitness. I try to keep it to myself but some days I just can't help it. This is why I have the MFP app on my phone now so I can quietly look at calories before placing my order in case the item I had picked out previously is no longer on the menu. :P
  • brokenjawedmuse
    brokenjawedmuse Posts: 132
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    It is not the kind of place that has nutritional menu. It is Chinese hot pot. You get broth in a boiling pot (has good amount of fat in it) and than order raw stuff to put in to it and all of it is shared by your table. So other people order what they want at the table and no way to avoid fatty (and very delicious broth) that everything must be cooked in. But that is not the difficult part -- the tough part is having no clue how many calories is in it.

    Same with other Chinese restaurants. Who can tell how many calories are in the hand pulled noodle with cumin lamb all in hot chili oil? No idea. A lot.

    As far as support goes. My husband hears me talk about it all the time. Closest friends know. But friends that are not that close should not be subjected to this at dinner.

    I can't imagine the broth having that much fat in it. Every hot pot I've had was a bone broth which is rather low in calories (and immensely good for your hair/skin/nails).

    As for eating out at other asian restaurants, I'd guestimate the best you can and just eat healthy the rest of the day. You're not going to be able to get an exact count (even if you're making it at home) every time on everything, so do the best you can and don't fret. Enjoy the company.

    Also, might help to eat before you go, something low calorie that is also very filling so you can spend more time socializing and not eating.
  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
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    That's ok because i'm that girl who doesn't go out to dinner with friends. :laugh:
  • Icelandic_Saga
    Icelandic_Saga Posts: 2,926 Member
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    lol I try not to talk about it in front of anyone either. Every time I mention calories, someone tries to get me to eat more food!
  • KANGOOJUMPS
    KANGOOJUMPS Posts: 6,472 Member
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    then don't be that girl.
  • NYCNika
    NYCNika Posts: 611 Member
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    This is really not a salad place. They won't have it. Ordering a salad in a Chinese hot pot place in Chinatown is ridiculous.

    Things that go into the already deliciously fatty broth are mostly -- "supreme fatty beef", lamb shoulder, beef tripe, pork belly. and they melt even more fat into it. Sure, they have veggies, but they must go into the broth -- due to hygiene standards of such places, it would be unsafe to eat them otherwise.

    And it is still my firm believe that if you go to a restaurant, you should get the thing restaurant is know for. I guess the only thing I can do is exercise and portion control and hope to just "break even" in calories for the day.

    The thing with portion control -- I am successful at it because I measured food out before I put it on the plate -- so when the food is gone, the meal is over. Here, all this deliciousness will be piled on shared dishes right in front of me for hours. :o
  • Meg_Shirley_86
    Meg_Shirley_86 Posts: 275 Member
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    You know, the one that keeps going on about calories and diet when out with friends for dinner. I used to find it incredibly annoying, and now that I am making this progress and am pretty obsessed with fitness, eating right and all that, it will be tough.

    I need to go out, eat whatever I will be eating, have a drink and NOT talk about any of this stuff unless asked a specific question. This Sat. going out to a restaurant that is less than healthy (hot pot) with a bunch of people and it will be a challenge. My goal is to look like I'm not trying at all, like I'm my old careless self.

    I know the feel, OP. I am in the same boat. I've been making progress and I have been trying not to be obnoxious and preachy when people ask about my food choice, or my workout, or what have you. People are especially nosy because I am pregnant (for the record, not trying to lose weight, I eat a ton, and I eat good food. I lost weight at first but it's staying the same now, which is OK bc I am overweight). For me, I decide right away if I want my group outing to be indulgent or if I want to save any indulgences for another time when I am craving it more. From there I decide what I will eat ahead of time and I usually snack on some raw veggies (or your healthy snack of choice) before I go. Usually half my food goes uneaten, and if I picked a healthier choice at the restaurant I take it home for later. I am sure that when people do talk to me about my progress I look hypocritical, since I am still heavy, but I am feeling so much better and have so much more energy that I want to share!
  • Amandatorie
    Amandatorie Posts: 93 Member
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    It is not the kind of place that has nutritional menu. It is Chinese hot pot. You get broth in a boiling pot (has good amount of fat in it) and than order raw stuff to put in to it and all of it is shared by your table. So other people order what they want at the table and no way to avoid fatty (and very delicious broth) that everything must be cooked in. But that is not the difficult part -- the tough part is having no clue how many calories is in it.

    Same with other Chinese restaurants. Who can tell how many calories are in the hand pulled noodle with cumin lamb all in hot chili oil? No idea. A lot.

    As far as support goes. My husband hears me talk about it all the time. Closest friends know. But friends that are not that close should not be subjected to this at dinner.

    I would think Hot Pot is probably one of the healthiest ways you can go eating out at a restaurant with friends! While the broth my have some fat in it (i.e. oil), that's the only bad thing about the meal. Otherwise you're just eating lean meats, seafood, and vegetables. And it's easy to control how much you eat since it's all shared. Log a little extra oils for the meal, and just enjoy all the fresh foods.
  • AlongCame_Molly
    AlongCame_Molly Posts: 2,835 Member
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    What's wrong with being "that girl"? Would you rather be one of the fat girls who howls and moans about her weight over four glasses of wine and a cheese platter?

    The only reason people get annoyed with "that girl" is because she makes them feel guilty about their poor choices. But I'm not going to let THEIR guilt get in the way of MY success, or what makes me happy, which is fitness and proper nutrition. If others want to get irked over your success and being a good example, that's their prerogative, but personally, I'm sure as hell not going to let their piss-poor attitudes shame me back into my bad habits. I'm proud as hell to be "that girl"!
  • SakuraRose13
    SakuraRose13 Posts: 621 Member
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    Im her, but like one of the other posts said I check thier menu before hand online and ask when Im there whats the healthiest dish and go from there. I eat mostly the same things just in moderation if you want to keep the caloires down take your meal and cut it in half.so half the soup half a sandwich an example.You might be surprised that your full sooner and drink water instead of pop,tea so on. Good luck your health is important and others should find it inspiring losing wieght is difficult and time consuming but worth it.I tell everyone yes Im watching my calories and exercising because Im important.My body is a temple and I need to treat it better :)
  • crubinetti
    crubinetti Posts: 53 Member
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    When I know I'm going out an where I am going, I check out the menu online before hand, and kind of plan out what i will eat. then for that day since i have an aprrox count for what i will need that night, I plan the rest of the day around that. lighter lunch, exercise in the am, whatever it takes to make sure i dont go over.

    Agreed!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am doing that tonight! Plus before I leave to go out, I shovel in fruits and veggies so that I am half full when I go!
  • imtrinat
    imtrinat Posts: 153 Member
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    You have to be obsessed about fitness and nutrition in a society that is obsessed with bad food. It's the only way to offset it. Friends and family who unintentionally sabotage you, constant fast food commercials on TV, McDonald's on every corner, and hectic schedules that make it difficult to eat well. It has to be at the forefront of our minds, especially if we are easily led astray. Yeah, you don't want to be "that girl" but I've found that people put me in that role just by being mindful of what I eat and working out a few times a week. It's not the norm to be healthy, it seems. Don't worry about it. Go have your yummy meal with your friends. Make sure you don't overdo it and just keep moving forward if you do.
  • imtrinat
    imtrinat Posts: 153 Member
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    What's wrong with being "that girl"? Would you rather be one of the fat girls who howls and moans about her weight over four glasses of wine and a cheese platter?

    The only reason people get annoyed with "that girl" is because she makes them feel guilty about their poor choices. But I'm not going to let THEIR guilt get in the way of MY success, or what makes me happy, which is fitness and proper nutrition. If others want to get irked over your success and being a good example, that's their prerogative, but personally, I'm sure as hell not going to let their piss-poor attitudes shame me back into my bad habits. I'm proud as hell to be "that girl"!

    haha. I love this.
  • medeamama
    medeamama Posts: 47 Member
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    These are all great ideas! I went out with a friend on Friday, and read the menu ahead of time. It had the extra benefit of me not having to pull out my reading glasses at the table LOL!
    I knew exactly what I was going to order, and made sure not to eat all of it. Had great leftovers today too!

    I know some folks who actually portion out their meal as soon as they get it, but that is too much like "that girl!" ;-)

    Good luck... and remember... one day of being "bad" won't kill you. You have to live a little too! Just watch your portions!

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