kids are mean

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Replies

  • amosmoses88
    amosmoses88 Posts: 163 Member
    My mom would have smacked me hard for that. I am sure he is learning from bad parenting which seems to be standard these days. Sorry it happened to you, be proud of your accomplishments!

    Shoot, if my grandmother was still in her right mind, she would have a switch waiting for me when I got home. lol. And I'm 24! lol. But kids these days are different with their picking. It's become more brutal. I was always teased for walking different growing up, but now if I were still in school age, I can be positive I would be beaten up. A lot of kids today and bullied way too bad.
  • jbum68
    jbum68 Posts: 23
    As others have said, 10 years old is old enough to know better. Something to do, and I've done, is say loud enough for the parent to hear, "Aren't you a well behaved child". The look on the mom's face was priceless, and I got a snicker from the 60+ year old lady behind me. When my kid was in the blurting stage I've had to explain and it was no problem. Smokers used to get the "oh, smoking is bad" and I'd just say "learning in school" and the guy would laugh.
  • 40Marbles
    40Marbles Posts: 188 Member
    My daughter, who just turned 9, knows that to call someone fat may very well hurt their feelings.

    So, one day when we were out for a walk she said, "Mama, back when you were huge you didn't go for walks with us."

    Um, thanks dear.
  • cuterbee
    cuterbee Posts: 545
    I have to agree, at 10 that kid is too old to be doing stuff like that.

    However, younger kids have no filter on what they should say. When my daughter was around 3, there was an elderly lady wearing a full-skirted black dress in the grocery store. My daughter took one look at her and shrieked, "Mommy, IT'S A WITCH!!!" I was mortified, but the lady didn't even turn around and look at us! (my daughter and I did have a talk about not making remarks about people's looks or clothing later, though)
  • Dulcemami4ever
    Dulcemami4ever Posts: 344 Member
    Um well 10 years old is not too young to not know the difference. You should have just said " Well your ugly. Atleast I can lose the weight." I know mean and childish but the little *kitten* had it coming :) Even my 4 year old knows better.
  • HealthyNowForever
    HealthyNowForever Posts: 45 Member
    At 10, he should know better. Sorry that happened to you.
  • avababy05
    avababy05 Posts: 930 Member
    Wow.....wow....omg....I can't imagine what the kid hears at home if they just blurted that out! On a nicer note....I got hugged by a special needs girl who said I was soft & squishy like a marshmellow:) So much sweeter when not backed w/malice...

    I like that! My daughter says I "lost my fluff"
  • stephaniemejia1671
    stephaniemejia1671 Posts: 482 Member
    You have to just weird THEM out and ask them to explain themselves. And then ask them to take you to their parents and put THEM in the spotlight. Either the kid will freak out or the parents will. It can't be anymore worse for the person who's feelings got hurt, as long as the offender feels the same way. We all win. That being said let NO ONE take away from the fact that you worked hard to be where you are now.
  • fit4lifeUcan2
    fit4lifeUcan2 Posts: 1,458 Member
    Kids are such a-holes. That's when you point at him and say "you're rude (or mean)."

    Well, not really. For some kids, even negative attention is pay-off enough. Best no attention.

    I was thinking the same thing but would have done what the OP did and just walked away.
  • DoingitWell
    DoingitWell Posts: 560 Member
    Its funny you guys are talking about bad parenting, but yet some of you guys are talking about responding negatively, or even striking someone's child. Guess you had bad parents. The OP handled it appropriately. Serioiusly If someone slapped my child they would be in handcuffs.
  • MissSusieQ
    MissSusieQ Posts: 533 Member
    "yeah? well i'd still rather be me than you"
  • Zoejohnse91
    Zoejohnse91 Posts: 227 Member
    I would have smacked my kid right up side the head and then make him apologize. Just plain rude....and by the way you look great. so eff that damn brat :flowerforyou:

    ^^^This! Rude child!
  • ladymiseryali
    ladymiseryali Posts: 2,555 Member
    Its funny you guys are talking about bad parenting, but yet some of you guys are talking about responding negatively, or even striking someone's child. Guess you had bad parents. The OP handled it appropriately. Serioiusly If someone slapped my child they would be in handcuffs.

    Agreed. The kid may have been rude, but that's NO excuse to be violent.

    And yes, I consider spankings to be a form of violence....
  • cazzer69
    cazzer69 Posts: 162 Member
    "You're ugly. I'm losing weight, but you will always be ugly"

    Destroy them while they're young. :)
  • galenofedgewood
    galenofedgewood Posts: 146 Member
    i was in walmart mcdonalds getting my fiance some food (i dont eat mcdonalds) and a kid (about 10yrs old) points to me and yells out "your fat" i grabbed my food and just walked out. im so mad and upset (and i know i shouldnt be) but i am! :(

    "Keep eating here and you'll be as fat as me!"

    Best response I could come up with. /dunno
  • dinosnopro
    dinosnopro Posts: 2,177 Member
    Could the child have a condition that leads him to have no filter? Even if not, a lot of children's books use fat to describe things that are larger than others.

    Kids have said some pretty hurtful things to me in the past, I figure they are kids they just have a reduced filter ( whether or not they were taught it is rude to say )


    inb4 we need to rewrite all children's books to remove the word fat.
  • NotBonJovi
    NotBonJovi Posts: 187 Member
    Weight loss journey is never easy. But that doesn't mean it can't be fun. He is just a 10 year old ad hasn't learnt better. Don't bring yourself down to his level and react (which you did not).

    You will come across many such insensitive remarks, no matter what your weight. Let such things slide like water off a duck's back. Don't pet the sweaty things and don't sweat over petty things. Smile and stay on track.

    You have been doing wonderful. Don't let minor things derail your emotional happiness.
  • tcasey4
    tcasey4 Posts: 18 Member
    I was at a friends house with a large group of women and a child asked about the baby in my tummy. I was horrified, and humiliated... Of course I was not pregnant. But none the less I cried the way home.
  • 2credneck208
    2credneck208 Posts: 501 Member
    As a mom of 4, I have to say a 10 year old should know better. I'm guessing that kid is not learning the right way to treat others from his parents or has a condition which limits his ability to filter. I'm sorry that even happened. You definitely do not look fat in your picture!


    THIS!! Shake it off, who cares what a bratty 10 y/o thinks anyway! :flowerforyou:
  • aj445
    aj445 Posts: 183 Member
    10 is too old for that, and I hope the parent had a serious talking to.

    However, this reminds me of when my son has just turned 3, we were on a bus and this woman got on and sat down, she was really big, like, sitting with legs apart and stomach almost touching the floor. She was the biggest person I have ever seen, and the biggest person he had ever seen. My son was staring at her and I discreetly distracted him, but he kept looking toward her despite my efforts. Eventually he blurted out, "That lady has a really big belly!" and I quickly shushed him and hoped she hadn't heard because she was far enough away and he didn't yell. The woman did hear, she turned to him and told him, "You're a mean little boy and you owe me an apology!" My son apologized because she told him to, but the look on his face at that moment made me want to get up and kick her face in, he was 3, he didn't understand why it was okay to tell someone they have really long hair, that their hair is super curly, or that they are as tall as his Daddy but it wasn't okay to tell someone they have a fat belly. What he did understand was what it meant to be a mean person, and for someone to call him a mean person really confused and hurt him, demanding he apologize just really sent home that he had done something wrong and he didn't understand what. Luckily our stop came up and we got off, the bus driver said something sympathetic to me, and when we got home I talked to my son about how sometimes people's differences make them feel sad, or bad about themselves and that we shouldn't point them out.

    It still bothers me years later. I don't know what I should have done, being a city bus she could have been totally off her nut and I didn't want to engage her based on prior experiences with bus-nut jobs. I would have apologized if I knew she had heard him, but I didn't think she had, the bus is loud, he didn't say it loud, and she was a good distance away looking at something else, and I certainly wasn't going to try to get her attention "just in case she did hear" because if she hadn't, I'd be calling her attention to it.

    Kids can be mean, 10 is old enough to know better, and kudos to you for not retaliating (I don't know that I'd be so level headed), but I wanted to add this for people out there that have taken harsh comments from young kids - the little ones don't know what they're saying, they just make observations and if you feel like they said something really hurtful, the proper response is not to yell at them and call them mean, it's to tell them, "It really hurts my feelings when you say that", or ignore it and understand that they're still trying to learn how to be people. It's super hard to teach tact to a toddler and as a parent you can't just shove a sock in their mouths every time you're in public (that's illegal, who knew?) Heck, my son is 5 and today at the grocery checkout he was yelling about having an itch in his butt crack that he couldn't itch and he wanted me to itch it. Yeah.

    Aww. I would have told her she did have a big belly and he was 3 and wasn't being mean. I would then explain to my son ( who is currently 3 ha) that some people are sensitive and it isn't appropriate to make comments about other peoples weight as it can hurt peoples feelings. BUT a 10 year old should definitely know better! My 6 year old knows what it means to get feelings hurt, be embarassed etc.

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