Things women will never hear a man say

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  • homerjspartan
    homerjspartan Posts: 1,893 Member
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    Honey, I made you an account on myfitnesspal.com. Your user name will be Fatty McGee, password, sexlessmarriage.

    This isn't funny. That actually is my wife's name and password.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,669 Member
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    Please don't spit.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • dirtnap63
    dirtnap63 Posts: 1,387 Member
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    "A threesome with you and your friend? No, I couldn't."
  • RoseKatet
    RoseKatet Posts: 149 Member
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    "A threesome with you and your friend? No, I couldn't."

    Was waiting for you, dirt lol
  • ninjakristin
    ninjakristin Posts: 28
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    I'm wrong:laugh:

    I am never actually wrong unless I am letting you perceive I am wrong for my own gain.

    That...or your wrong :wink:

    you're*

    To add to the thread: Let's go to counseling.
  • RoseKatet
    RoseKatet Posts: 149 Member
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    I'm wrong:laugh:

    I am never actually wrong unless I am letting you perceive I am wrong for my own gain.

    That...or your wrong :wink:

    you're*

    omg
  • MireyGal76
    MireyGal76 Posts: 7,334 Member
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    I have a headache
  • nashsheri33
    nashsheri33 Posts: 225 Member
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    honey, will you go shoe shopping with me?
  • akaMrsmojo
    akaMrsmojo Posts: 762 Member
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    I rather sit here and talk than watch the ending of the this football game that just went into overtime.
  • jenbit
    jenbit Posts: 4,289 Member
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    oh I love it when you put your Ice cold feet on the back of my legs just as I drift off to sleep......

    Don't swallow
  • MomiTia
    MomiTia Posts: 94 Member
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    "No, honey, that's OK...I've had enough sex this week. Let's just cuddle and go to sleep."


    This
  • Mrder37
    Mrder37 Posts: 904
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    I hate spooning too
  • djfriedman81
    djfriedman81 Posts: 125
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    Is it in?
  • Kebby83
    Kebby83 Posts: 232 Member
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    "Here, let me do those dishes while you relax and catch up on America's Next Top Model. Then I'll go get started on that laundry while I give the kids a bath. Can I get you a glass of wine or anything to enjoy while you relax?"

    Mine has said that!
  • theskinnylist
    theskinnylist Posts: 286 Member
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    Sure! I'd love to watch the Kardashians with you !
    My fiance would love this one.
  • sizzle74
    sizzle74 Posts: 858 Member
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    Sure! I'd love to watch the Kardashians with you !

    Hey, my man says that! He knows it gets him laid. Plus there is an understanding that he can make fun of them the entire time. :)
  • trijoe
    trijoe Posts: 729 Member
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    I'm wrong:laugh:

    In our house, it's the exact opposite. I'M the one who's quick to admit mistakes.

    Some things you'll never hear me say:
    Honey, I'm headed on a beer run. Can I pick up some feminine hygiene products for you while I'm out?
    I saw this cute little pair of black leather pumps that would look so sweet on you!
    No, OF COURSE you don't have enough shoes already! Who does?
    Toddlers and Tiaras is on! Wanna watch it with me? We can cuddle through the adorable parts!
    I was thinking. It's been a while. Can we invite your sister over for a week's visit? How 'bout your parents too? Can't wait!

    And the number one thing you'll never hear me say:
    Yes!!! I LOVE LOVE LOVE these new clothes you picked out for me without my asking, hung in my closet without my knowledge, and are now telling me I must wear if I ever want to have sex with you again before I die! Who cares if I already have clothes I like and enjoy wearing? I can't get enough of this!
  • tammyknaak
    tammyknaak Posts: 12 Member
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    Just catching up.....my first thought that I don't think I have ever heard a man say is - Honey, do these jeans make my butt look big?
  • Mrder37
    Mrder37 Posts: 904
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    No I agree that waitress was super hot I can't blame you for looking:)
  • powrwrap
    powrwrap Posts: 85 Member
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    I'd love to go shoe shopping with you, and BONUS the malls won't be crowded since the NFL playoffs are on TV this afternoon!

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