Don't hate me because I'm losing weight.....

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  • jenniferrr127
    jenniferrr127 Posts: 44 Member
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    It's jealousy and they see you as a threat. Take it as a compliment because you are doing something they secretly want to, but won't, because like everyone else said, it is work and doesn't come easy.

    Like every other aspect in life, people want everything handed to them and they can't stand when others succeed when they are not.

    Congratulations on your hard work and continue to be an inspiration!!!!
  • Yooperm35
    Yooperm35 Posts: 787 Member
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    Actually another friend has told me that one of my good friends made the comment, "She's not going to be able to keep up with that!" - apparently she means the eating right and exercising?

    She will also make comments if I say something about having to lose a few more pounds because my BMI is in the overweight category, "Those charts are way too high, you look great". Almost like she does not want me to succeed or something? I'm sure she is in the overweight category because she is about the size I was before I started MFP and I was just a few pounds away from obese.

    I never confronted her about saying I won't be able to keep up with it, I'm just going to silently prove her wrong. She seemed almost elated when I actually had recently gained over #10 - shakes my head!
  • dym123
    dym123 Posts: 1,670 Member
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    With a few people, I noticed that while I was still bigger than them, I received lots of compliments about how much weight I had lost. After I had gotten smaller than them (and in better shape), the compliments stopped. I think it is apparent to them now that hard work and dedication to diet and exercise are the key. Those same folks also criticize my low carb approach when I'm out of earshot. Hey, to each their own, I've never tried to push it on anyone else but it has worked for me.

    I've found that the people who truly care about you will be the most gracious in their response.

    This happened to me. When I first started working at my place of employment, I was bigger than the other admin I work with. When I first started losing weight, it was slow and hardly noticeable, but she was always very encouraging, saying how she could tell I was losing wieght, but then I got smaller than her and suddenly no more encouraging words, she no longer wanted to hear about any of my successes.
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,022 Member
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    Nobody ever believes me when I tell them I lost 100+ lbs solely through diet and exercise. Some people think I'm flat out lying, and others will say something like "Well yeah, but what did you take? You at least took a pill or did shakes or something, right?"

    The truth is, you can't make people believe something they don't want to believe. And most people don't want to believe that there is no shortcut or magic pill. Frankly, I was relieved when my mom lost 50 lbs through just dieting and exercising because that proved to me that I COULD do it on my own, and that I didn't need any special pill or diet or surgery.
  • NanaWubbie
    NanaWubbie Posts: 248 Member
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    Aren't people strange? Rise above and keep steady on your path. I am almost 10 years post a dramatic year of weight loss, and I had a similar experience. I learned who my friends were and weren't. 10 years later, I still have people come to me apologizing for treating me the way they did. (I was bullied to the point of having to change roles at work). You know something? Even though it took me forever to get comfortable in my own skin, I did get used to it....and settled happily into the new job (same employer). Surround yourself with people who will support you, and be gracious and rise above those who don't. Many have come to me asking me to show them how I did it, and have come back as friends after all, after a little more life experience.
  • stella1314
    stella1314 Posts: 66 Member
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    I had different experience..
    my mother was always telling me how beautiful i was...
    and now she said : " YOU LOOKED LIKE A MOUNTAIN.."
  • stella1314
    stella1314 Posts: 66 Member
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    YOU LOOK AWESOME!
    ENJOY IT!
    DONT LET THOSE *****ES UPSET YOU!
  • thirstyflea
    thirstyflea Posts: 114 Member
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    Oh yeah, I get that "hate" from people. Backhanded compliments... although they never feel good...

    My favorite though are my friends & family who won't acknowledge my weight loss. At all. And yes, I think they notice.
  • NovemberJune
    NovemberJune Posts: 2,525 Member
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    Yes I get a lot of that from one person and a little of it from a few others.
  • MissyBenj
    MissyBenj Posts: 186 Member
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    ALL.THE.TIME.

    It's frustrating, but I know that I motivate them to move their butts more too. Nobody in my office went to the gym regularly and now 4 of them are active during the week. It's rewarding - just remember you know that you're dedicated and your body shows it. Jealousy is one of the biggest forms of flattery. Take it and smile :)
  • Ramberta
    Ramberta Posts: 1,312 Member
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    Honestly, I would relish that kind of attention almost more than compliments, because it proves they're extremely jealous of you. It can seem hurtful (especially from your Mom), but just realize that they WISH they could achieve what you have, BUT they're not willing or ready to put in the effort you have!

    Just try not to go fishing for compliments and recognition in those types of situations, you're just going to get grief. That's why you're here, so we can tell you how awesome you are for doing this :)
  • Blacklance36
    Blacklance36 Posts: 755 Member
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    At my work i get the "losing weight is so easy for you" stuff.
    WTH, in reality I want to eat all the doughnuts and chocolate I can like the rest of the office. I just say "no" but its a fight. There is nothing easy about it.
    Keep making them jealous!
  • melinda200208
    melinda200208 Posts: 525 Member
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    You are right, they are hating because they are jelous. All you can do is take that as a compliment. And, hopefully they will come to you for advice. (sounds like the one lady wanted advice from you) Keep trecking girl! You look great!!!
  • billthekill
    billthekill Posts: 90
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    Haters gonna hate.

    People are much more comfortable being overweight when everyone else around them are the same.

    2/3 of adult Americans are overweight or obese. This group acceptance of everyone being fat is now sustaining our overweight nation.


    Good to see you are willing to break away.
  • WaterBunnie
    WaterBunnie Posts: 1,370 Member
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    Send a memo round inviting them to a lunch break boot camp session or brisk walk and see how many of them take you up on it! You're doing great, don't be put off by them.
  • NotAResolution
    NotAResolution Posts: 58 Member
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    Nobody ever believes me when I tell them I lost 100+ lbs solely through diet and exercise. Some people think I'm flat out lying, and others will say something like "Well yeah, but what did you take?
    Time, you took the time to lose the weight...
  • NutellaAddict
    NutellaAddict Posts: 1,258 Member
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    You should have said thanks, "have they gotten fatter or just wearing smaller clothes?"
  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
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    I think it's more that they hate themselves for not trying until they succeeded. You're just a physical reminder of the things they dislike about themselves. They like being able to believe that fitness is for other people - not normal people like them. When you went off and showed them that normal people are able to lose weight and be fit, you knocked out at least 1 excuse (probably more) as to why they are where they are.

    This. All of this.
  • jennifer_255
    jennifer_255 Posts: 86 Member
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    i had my friend who is 8 stone turn around to me after i lost 2 stone very quickly n go wow your gonna be competition now uv lost loads of weight. i was in shock i couldnt belive someone could compliment me but insult me at the same time lol
  • MichelleLaree13
    MichelleLaree13 Posts: 865 Member
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    I am jealous of Anna Kornikova's body. I am sure she works out way more than me to get there and I am not mad at her for it.

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