What's the most random thing you've heard a little kid say ?

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  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
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    ...My favourite one though, is when I was working in a shop, and a little girl came in, stops, stares at me, and says "mummy! A princess!" I have no idea why she said that, but it comes back to me 10 years later to make me smile...

    I was volunteering in my aunt's first-grade classroom one day and when I came into the room, one boy pointed and shouted, "Look, a beautiful princess!" and all the little ones turned and went "wow" and "ooh" and "ahh." So adorable! :heart:
  • Bownzi
    Bownzi Posts: 423 Member
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    OMG..... Get this f"""""""g frog off of me.....it's trying to eat me.... Kid in a basket who's grand ma had just put the very large stuffed frog on the shelf.and it fell down over the kids head...
  • leomom72
    leomom72 Posts: 1,797 Member
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    when my son was 4, we were at walmart, a veteran was outside in his wheelchair, and he had neither of his legs..i knew it was going to be a disaster if we went in the nearest door, so i bee-lined to the opposite side, but it was too late..my son, blurted out very loudly "mommy, how cont that man has no legs?" i was horrified..then my other son, on a different occasion saw some i guess middle eastern women, all covered up and such, and he said "look daddy, ghosts !" im SO glad they are mostly past that phase:blushing:
  • MFPfriend
    MFPfriend Posts: 1,121 Member
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    Bump. These are making me laugh so hard!
  • robot_potato
    robot_potato Posts: 1,535 Member
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    Every time we walk in our gate, my 4 year old slams the gate shut and tails it for the door. If you ask him why he says 'so the peapocks(peacocks) don't get me!' He's been doing this for months now. We've never had a peacock anywhere near our house.
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
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    conversation between my two:

    6 yr old: you're a living thing

    (then) 2 yr old: I'm NOT a living thing!!

    6 yr old: yes you are. you're a little girl. little girls are living things

    2 yr old: I'm NOT a living thing!!!

    6 yr old: but you are a living thing though!!!

    2 yr old: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! MUMMY!!!!!!!!!!!!! (name) is calling me a living thing! WAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 17,959 Member
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    I'm famous in my family for this one.

    My grandfather had a sister called Agnes and she wasn't very popular with the family. At 3 years old, I walked up to her and announced "We've got a chicken called Agnes. Mummy says she's an old b!tch too!"
  • MandyPhoe
    MandyPhoe Posts: 94 Member
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    I watched this teacher pretend to be a deer to get some 3-4 year olds to state what tigers ate.

    As he crawled around the room ....

    Child 1 : MEAT!!!! TIGERS EAT MEAT!!!
    Teacher : Very good (name) ---- what kind of meat??
    Child 2 : Red Meat!
    Child 3 : White meat! Because you are white!
  • VanessaHeartsMasr
    VanessaHeartsMasr Posts: 727
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    My daughter was NOTORIOUS for saying funny stuff.

    When she was 5 years old, she went to an after school program. I was a single mom at this point of my life. One day when picking her up, the teacher excitedly exclaimed, "Congratulations!" I was confused and asked her why she said that. "Kayla told me you are having a baby!" "Um, no. I'm not having a baby." Turning to my daughter, "Why would you say that?" To which she replied, very loudly, "MOM! You ARE going to have a baby! As soon as you find a man!"

    Another time, in a very crowded Target bathroom, loudly, "MOM! Why is your butt so hairy?" You could hear a pin drop, followed by tons of stifled laughter in the surrounding stalls.

    Another time, when she was about 3, she had just learned the correct anatomical name of her private part. That day at her daycare center, all the kids made puppets and were told to name their puppets. All the other kids named their puppets "Fred" or "George" or some other mundane name. I got quietly pulled into the corner by the teacher who informed me that Kayla had named her puppet "Vagina."
  • Kymmu
    Kymmu Posts: 1,650 Member
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    a first grader- apropos of nothing - " Why do girl cows have all of those penises?"
  • Terasome
    Terasome Posts: 3,808 Member
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    My 4 year old today was playing with his sisters dolls and told me one of them was going to die because she sniffed the other ones butt. I had to look the other one to stifle my laugh.
  • nancycaregiver
    nancycaregiver Posts: 812 Member
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    My husband and I had our 20th anniversary when my youngest son was 4. He had a serious crush on an 18 year old from church. So for our anniversary, we decided to go out of town for the night. We left the children with Katy, the girl from church overnight. The youngest did well and we were very excited because it was his first time away from home. That Monday when I took him to preschool, I asked him to tell everyone what he did over the weekend. He smiled really big and said, "I slept with Katy Qualls!"
  • BflSaberfan
    BflSaberfan Posts: 1,272
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    My daughter was 3 at the time. I was washing dishes. She comes up to me and says "Mama can I play with the man nuggets?" I put the dish down and stare at her with big eyes, my mind scrambling to understand if I heard her correctly, I said "what"???? She says "the man nuggets, where are they, I want to play with them" Now I'm SURE I heard her correctly, I dont know whether to be concerned or laugh, I said "We dont have man nuggets" She says "yes the man nuggets you hide them in the closet!!!!, I want the man nuggets!!" I take her over to the closet, open the door, and show her there are no man nuggets hidden in the closet,...she takes out the MAGNETIX and goes about her business.


    The same child a year later told me my nephew zipped up his vagina after he went to the bathroom. :laugh:


    My oldest daughter saw my mom struggling to get out of her chair and making some groans while doing it ...my daughter said "Grandma are you pooping??"
  • the_journeyman
    the_journeyman Posts: 1,877 Member
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    Upsidebackwards

    JM
  • KevinsCatie
    KevinsCatie Posts: 137 Member
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    And this is one of my favorite things to come out of my niece's mouth (after she stuck a metal barrette in a socket and shocked herself...and she's four)

    SIL: "Oh, Anna, why would you do that?"
    Anna: "It's your fault! You took the cover off the outlet. Why would you do that?"

    ^^^ This..... made me cry I was laughing so hard!

    My friends 5 yr old had this convoe with his mom
    "Mommy, why does Osito call his weewee a turtle?"
    "Because thats what he wants to call it."
    "Oh..... I'm going to call mine a giraffe!"
  • sa11yjane
    sa11yjane Posts: 491 Member
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    On One Born Every Minute a lady was having twins and her young son apparently went into school and told everyone that his mum and dad must have 'done it' for a long time as they were having twins!
  • hdjjones
    hdjjones Posts: 130 Member
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    It was spring time and my daughter was about 4 years old. The male and female cat were doing their thing and my daughter said "Look dad, kitty's riding back seat and biting."
  • KevinsCatie
    KevinsCatie Posts: 137 Member
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    I had 3 year old with spina bifida. He wore big bulky braces that wrapped around his waist, ran down the outside of his legs, locked at the knees, and hooked into the sides of his shoes. He could walk with a walker with the braces on. He would get so angry when I would change his diaper because he wanted to wear underwear like his brother but was unable to because of the spina bifida. He would scream at me terribly every diaper change. I knew the source of his anger and would just talk to him. One day, he was yelling at me to put his shoes back on, which I did not plan on doing because it was time for nap and he could not sleep in those big bulky braces. He told me to take the shoes off the braces and put them on, RIGHT NOW!! It was very difficult and time consuming to take them apart just to put them back together after nap time. But he continued to scream at me so I said "Give me one good reason to put your shoes on at nap time and I'll do it". He got very close to my face and said in a very quiet voice "What if I dream that I'm running!"
    Well, I wiped the tears from my eyes while I unhooked the braces from his shoes and he never had to ask me again to put his shoes on for nap time!

    This made me cry. So beautiful!


    Ahhhh Me too!
  • hdjjones
    hdjjones Posts: 130 Member
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    When my son was little I dropped something and it rolled under a chair. My wife was in a panick that I lost it. I was down on my knees looking for it and said to my wife, "don't get so excited, it's not a crisis, I will find it". The next thing I know my son is standing next to me with a flashlight saying "here daddy, find the crisis".
  • vim_n_vigor
    vim_n_vigor Posts: 4,089 Member
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    Today at my son's preschool:

    Teacher: Who can write their last names without looking?
    My son: closes eyes and starts to write his name......

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