Bad Poetry

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silvergurl518
silvergurl518 Posts: 4,123 Member
in Chit-Chat
let's hear all your intentionally ridiculous, badly written poetry spurred on by a) boredom and b) caffeine.

here's what just came to me:

"peel that orange"

peel that orange
and weigh the peel
or else you'll pee
or something weird

lift that weight
but don't be late
to our very first date
when i give you a raspberry

you are an em eff pee
you make me squee
like one two three
and i'm spent

i've been drinking lots of water
and coffee
eating oreos
and broccoli
high five!

the end.
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Replies

  • Cameron_1969
    Cameron_1969 Posts: 2,857 Member
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    gaze_zpsb9da99a1.gif
  • taso42
    taso42 Posts: 8,980 Member
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    Oh freddled gruntbuggly
    thy micturations are to me
    As plurdled gabbleblotchits on a lurgid bee.
    Groop I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes. And hooptiously drangle me with crinkly bindlewurdles,
    Or I will rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon, see if I don't!

    Vogon Poetry. Worst in the Universe.
    /thread :tongue:
  • silvergurl518
    silvergurl518 Posts: 4,123 Member
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    Oh freddled gruntbuggly
    thy micturations are to me
    As plurdled gabbleblotchits on a lurgid bee.
    Groop I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes. And hooptiously drangle me with crinkly bindlewurdles,
    Or I will rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon, see if I don't!

    Vogon Poetry. Worst in the Universe.
    /thread :tongue:

    dying laughing. you win.
  • KrystalLight03
    KrystalLight03 Posts: 119
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    Kind of off topic, but I went to an art gallery opening recently and had someone tell me that he has spent the last four years of his life creating "a line of unique, interchangeable book covers for his series of experimental poetry." Who knew that poetry could be experimental? Or that it needed book covers...interchangeably?
  • thecanface
    thecanface Posts: 1,180 Member
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    Oh freddled gruntbuggly
    thy micturations are to me
    As plurdled gabbleblotchits on a lurgid bee.
    Groop I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes. And hooptiously drangle me with crinkly bindlewurdles,
    Or I will rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon, see if I don't!

    Vogon Poetry. Worst in the Universe.
    /thread :tongue:

    Taso your peom made my head hurt
    for that, i'll never lift my skirt
    let's try english, its the way to go
    then maybe you'll get a lil peep show
    I don't know why this turned sexual
    maybe cause it's friday and i do whatever i want

    Silver, you've got quite a creative load
    but you should eat more
    or else you'll go into starvation mode
    i'm bored as sheet and i want to go home
    If i was jewish, i'd say shalom.


    .....but i'm not, so bye.







    edit for misspelling Shalom. Don't judge me.
  • pucenavel
    pucenavel Posts: 972 Member
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    I like to swim
    My coach is him
    His name is Jim

    I like to cycle
    it's very vital
    to not be idle

    I like to run
    in the sun
    just for fun

    I do three sports
    Wearing a Tri-Suit of course
    (they're just special shorts)
  • Rixx31
    Rixx31 Posts: 220 Member
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    Roses are red
    Violets are blue
    Some poems rhyme
    And some don't
  • Rixx31
    Rixx31 Posts: 220 Member
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    Oh freddled gruntbuggly
    thy micturations are to me
    As plurdled gabbleblotchits on a lurgid bee.
    Groop I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes. And hooptiously drangle me with crinkly bindlewurdles,
    Or I will rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon, see if I don't!

    Vogon Poetry. Worst in the Universe.
    /thread :tongue:

    It's so much more profound when you read it after drinking a Pan Galactic Gargle-Blaster :drinker:
  • quirkytizzy
    quirkytizzy Posts: 4,052 Member
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    Kind of off topic, but I went to an art gallery opening recently and had someone tell me that he has spent the last four years of his life creating "a line of unique, interchangeable book covers for his series of experimental poetry." Who knew that poetry could be experimental? Or that it needed book covers...interchangeably?

    Couldn't you just do the same thing with refrigerator poetry? That's interchangeable.

    That said, I was youtube surfing for spoken poetry and became very annoyed at the number of people who had composed "musical poetry" and "visual poetry." I was perturbed - that's either music you're composing or else visual art. Poetry has words.

    A friend on FB just called me old and stodgy. :laugh:
  • ChristieisReady
    ChristieisReady Posts: 708 Member
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    I wrote a haiku.
    It didn't suck too badly.
    I deleted it.
  • silvergurl518
    silvergurl518 Posts: 4,123 Member
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    I wrote a haiku.
    It didn't suck too badly.
    I deleted it.

    i read your haiku.
    it was really quite funny
    or was it? ha ha.
  • ChristieisReady
    ChristieisReady Posts: 708 Member
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    I wrote a haiku.
    It didn't suck too badly.
    I deleted it.

    i read your haiku.
    it was really quite funny
    or was it? ha ha.

    I heart silver's face
    Sometimes I vacuum the house
    This poem went wrong.
  • Oishii
    Oishii Posts: 2,675 Member
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    Oh freddled gruntbuggly
    thy micturations are to me
    As plurdled gabbleblotchits on a lurgid bee.
    Groop I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes. And hooptiously drangle me with crinkly bindlewurdles,
    Or I will rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon, see if I don't!

    Vogon Poetry. Worst in the Universe.
    /thread :tongue:

    It's so much more profound when you read it after drinking a Pan Galactic Gargle-Blaster :drinker:

    I don't have a Babel Fish in, so I'm fine.
  • foxro
    foxro Posts: 793 Member
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    Aye an' a bit of Mackeral settler rack and ruin
    ran it doon by the haim, 'ma place
    well I slapped me and I slapped it doon in the side
    and I cried, cried, cried.

    The fear a fallen down taken never back the raize and then Craig Marion,
    get out wi' ye Claymore out mi pocket a' ran doon, doon the middin stain
    picking the fiery horde that was fallen around ma feet.
    Never he cried, never shall it ye get me alive
    ye rotten hound of the burnie crew. Well I snatched fer the blade O my
    Claymore cut and thrust and I fell doon before him round his feet.

    Aye! A roar he cried frae the bottom of his heart that I would nay fall
    but as dead, dead as 'a can be by his feet; de ya ken?

    ...and the wind cried Mary.
  • maab_connor
    maab_connor Posts: 3,927 Member
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    roses are red
    bacon's red too
    poems are hard
    bacon
  • Mr_Bad_Example
    Mr_Bad_Example Posts: 2,403 Member
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    The morning sun burns away into night
    I stand before you, trembling, frightened
    You introduce me to the girls and say
    "That pain you feel is fear leaving the body,
    FIGHT FOR IT!"
    Thank you, Ms. Jillian.
  • pucenavel
    pucenavel Posts: 972 Member
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    There once was a girl we called Sal
    Who logged onto MyFitnessPal
    As odd as it sounds,
    She lost 50 pounds,
    And now she's a hot, smokin' gal!
  • HiKaren
    HiKaren Posts: 1,306 Member
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    First .... Some good poetry by Stevie Nicks.. And reminds me of your user name:
    Songwriters: NICKS

    (Stevie Nicks)

    She was a silver girl
    Lost in a high tech world
    She was a golden girl
    Immersed in a hard core world
    She would have preferred
    The last generation
    But that's all right
    She is on her way

    She had the Midas touch
    She was Lady Luck
    She's got a million bucks
    And she looks like it
    She's had a few hard times
    Sometimes it blows her mind
    Those papers she never signed
    Sometimes she remembers

    Sometimes she was just an actress
    But you'll never really know
    A shadow moves across her face
    You cannot see her soul
    Unless she lets you
    See her soul

    She was a girlie girl
    Caught in a man's world
    And as her world turns
    She feels old so alone

    Still she's a danger girl
    Insane far beyond her years
    On some things she's very clear
    She's a wild adventurer

    Sometimes she was just an actress..
  • JuliaLee67
    JuliaLee67 Posts: 149
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    bad poetry?
    oh noetry.
  • HiKaren
    HiKaren Posts: 1,306 Member
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    And heres my bad poetry...

    She Was a MFP-Girl
    Wearing a bikini she does a twirl

    Ooops her bottoms fell right off...
    After she farted and coughed (The cough-fart combo that is)

    Someone told her it was either cheese or chocolate
    Then she cried and said, what the crap?
    No Way, No Way,
    Hommie don't play that way.

    She ate a apple every day,
    It was just her way (To keep regular that is)

    Had a thing for the peanut butter,
    But couldn't get any out of a cows udder. :laugh:

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