I need support and I am afraid, really, really scared.....

ireland5
ireland5 Posts: 8 Member
in Introduce Yourself
I am so overweight that I am scared. I lost weight a while back and was feeling great. I gained it all back and more. I now weigh more than I ever have in my life. I have had a horrible last two years, and that has contributed greatly to my physical decline. I am tired ALL the time and sleep way more than normal. I know my blood pressure is very elevated, and I am afraid to see a doctor. I only go out to work and socialize as little as I can. People who have not seen me in a while are shocked at my appearance, as I look completely different than I used to. I cannot do any of the things I would like to do, I have no stamina and no energy. I went through a very bad emotional trauma and cannot seem to get my self together. I have children, that I adore, I am so frustrated that my life has taken this turn, and I don't feel like I am the person I want to be or used to be. The fatigue is just unreal, it does not feel normal at all. I have no idea where to turn or what to do. I know I have more than 100 pounds to lose and just don't know where to begin, but cannot imagine living the rest of my life like this.
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Replies

  • bellyboosmom
    bellyboosmom Posts: 55 Member
    You can do this. Feel free to send me a friend request. I am a newbie on here, but I am good at encouraging others. I also have over 100 lbs to lose. Good luck to you on this journey.
  • tbetts23
    tbetts23 Posts: 303 Member
    You have kids. Get up and move with them! It will make you feel better. wake up in the morning, remember what you have (kids) and get a move on! You can do this!
  • jneill69
    jneill69 Posts: 22
    If your blood pressure is very high, please see your doctor ASAP. High blood pressure is no joke, and you could stroke or have a myriad of other serious health issues.

    Its great you are trying to lose weight, and that is a big step in the right direction. But, call your doctor as soon as you can get in!
  • ChildrenCryinNCoffee
    ChildrenCryinNCoffee Posts: 477 Member
    I could stand to lose 100 pounds, but I'm making my goals much smaller so I don't overwhelm myself in the process of getting healthy. Start small. Say you wanna lose 10 lbs, it'll be a quick victory and you'll have an NSV to share with everyone, then up it to 25lbs, etc. etc. etc. You can do it! Baby steps. If you want a friend who'll give you a supportive motivational kick in the butt, then add me, I'm your girl. But fair warning, I'm honest, I don't sugar coat anything and I call it like I see it. I'll be your biggest cheerleader. Hope we become friends!

    Always,
    Tricia
  • S0nsh1ne
    S0nsh1ne Posts: 218 Member
    Thanks for sharing. I would strongly encourage you to make an appointment with your doctor for a physical and a good talk before you begin any substantial changes in your diet or begin to exercise. I am glad you have your children to ground you and that you are ready to make some positive changes for your sake as well as theirs. Good luck!
  • luvriden
    luvriden Posts: 52
    You may not want to go to a doctor, but you really, really need to!! Sounds like you are very depressed, hence the fatigue and always tired. Your blood pressure problem is really serious too. Get to a doctor! Do it for your kids!
  • lynnw24
    lynnw24 Posts: 116 Member
    It is scary when you don't know what to do and where to start. But that's what the good people on MFP are there for! You can do it!! Please feel free to add me. I lost some weight and have alot to go so we can support each other! Welcome to MFP!!


    Anyone can add me if they'd like. The more support the better :)
  • annetteellison1
    annetteellison1 Posts: 20 Member
    You can absolutely do this. You have taken the first step by admitting that you don't feel good about where you are in your life. You can friend request me as well. We can encourage each other. All you need to do now is keep taking those steps. Even if they are baby steps.
  • Gwenski
    Gwenski Posts: 348 Member
    I was where you are about 16 months ago. I promise, you can turn this around! I started out with just a few small changes.
    I could only ride the exercise bike for less than 2 minutes at a time.. I crawled up my stairs to bed. I didn't think there was any way out. I understand your fear. Please try to do at least 1 thing today toward better health. Feel free to add me. I care.
  • rvicini
    rvicini Posts: 252 Member
    You are in the right place! These pals here will turn you into a winner in a month! You just have to relax and enjoy this life changing experience that begins today!
  • ashlbubba
    ashlbubba Posts: 224 Member
    Start at the beginning. One foot in front of the other... It sounds like you need to see the doc and find out where "the beginning" is.. you need to love yourself, no matter what the size. It sounds like you are looking at this journey as punishment... but it's not.. it's a gift that we give ourselves every day...

    Today I will be a better me than yesterday.

    :heart:
  • MaraDiaz
    MaraDiaz Posts: 4,604 Member
    You know your blood pressure is very elevated, that is something to be scared about. I hope you will go see a doctor and not risk keeling over dead, possibly around your kids. Hate to sound harsh, but it's much worse not to go see the doctor and figure out what to do about it.

    The rest I can relate to. I fell into a multi-year depression, gained well over 100 pounds, was tired, fatigued, suffered severe social anxiety (still have that, sadly), and pretty much was done living.

    Then I decided maybe I wasn't quite done yet and started making some changes. First thing I did was track everything once I found this site. And did a few minutes of exercise at a time (and I do mean a few minutes, after ten minutes of what I would now consider a joke exercise routine I sometimes puked).

    And here I am. My life isn't fixed by any means, but I definitely don't feel as hopeless. Or as tired. I have some of my old fight back. You can get yours back, too. But I really hope you'll make an appointment and go to the doctor this week even though you don't want to!
  • SquidVonBob
    SquidVonBob Posts: 290 Member
    The farther you have to go, the more amazing your story will be. I know you're scared but seeing the doctor is always safer. They can help you on your way as well. :flowerforyou:
  • sondrawolfe
    sondrawolfe Posts: 30 Member
    Have you had your thydroid tested recently? Sounds like you have many of the symptoms of hypothyroidism. Talk to your doctor.
  • bpdai
    bpdai Posts: 46 Member
    Sounds like you have made a great first step. I also need to lose more than 100 pounds, and have some of the same fears you mention. I came to MFP looking for accountability and support. I have found both. There are some great people on here ready to help you along this journey - congratulate you and celebrate your victories, and poke you when you need a poke to get moving again. Feel free to send me a friend request. I can't always make comments every day, but I try to help out my FMP Peeps every chance I get.
  • mandita208
    mandita208 Posts: 7 Member
    You can do this! You have kids, make them your motivation. Get your kids involved in helping you lose weight, make exercise fun! Also, if you believe you have high blood pressure, see your dr before starting to work out. Having high blood pressure and working out too intense can be so dangerous. So see your dr before you start anything too intense.

    Feel free to send me a friend request. Im always looking for more friends. Ive lost almost 80 pounds now, so if there is anything I can do to help you, just send me a message!
  • hoosiermama36
    hoosiermama36 Posts: 2
    In 2003 I lost 100 lbs. I felt on top of the world. It was hard work losing it but I did it and I loved all the attention, compliments and feedback. After awhile all that stopped. People saw me over and over and really how many times can they compliment me on my weight loss? I started to lose motivation. Then I became pregnant with baby #2. Fast forward through lots of bad decisions and hard times and I regained all 100 lbs.

    Losing it this time is horrible. It feels humiliating because now those same people see me big again. Of course few say anything but I always wonder what they are thinking. I have less faith in myself and sometimes completely lose motivation because I think "even if I lose it all again I'll just regain it".

    Maintenance is hard as heck. It really is.

    I can relate. I work at home anyway but I've isolated myself even further I'm depressed a lot and I kinda dropped out of life in general.

    However, here is what I'm thinking....whether I'm 100 lbs overweight, goal weight or somewhere in between I have to start living life right? So I can live it with some daily exercise, a few more good choices here and there and some tracking OR I can continue to live it like this but either way time will pass I'm not going to obsess, or aim for perfection - I need to just do it.

    I'd love plenty of friends along the way. I know it doesn't always feel like it (at least not for me) but it really IS true - we KNOW we can do it - we did it once. We really can do it again.
  • farmwife3815
    farmwife3815 Posts: 326 Member
    I hear you loud and clear. This is the place to be. Feel free to add me and message me any time with questions or whatever! When I started I could barely walk to the mailbox. You can do this. You've got a lot of support here!! :flowerforyou:
  • kaekencoffee
    kaekencoffee Posts: 81 Member
    We are ALL here to encourage you, but like PP's indicated, your doctor is a must! There are health concerns as well as other issues that CAN be overcome. Your doctor (if he or she is worth anything) will be able to HELP you as well with what to do and where to turn. Again, we'll all be here to encourage you whenever we can but seriously, get medical help. Your kids deserve to have a mom who's going to be around for them and YOU deserve to love yourself and get healthy!

    Please, see your doctor.
  • Zepher37
    Zepher37 Posts: 1
    Hi. I'm new to the site and was browsing around the forums when your post jumped out at me. My sister introduced me to this site after she had been using it for several weeks. I'm pretty fit right now but I am currently taking a new medication for depression and it can have the nasty side effect of ramping up hunger and causing weight gain. I want to keep to track of what I eat to make sure I maintain my healthy life style. I am no stranger to emotional trauma and I want to let you know that exercising can help with your emotions. It can release some of your pent up energy and frustration as well as calm you down. It also gives you more energy. So, if you need an extra incentive to exercise that can be a good one. I'd be happy to help and encourage you. Feel free to send me a friend request. I wish you the best of luck and the best of health.
  • LesaDave
    LesaDave Posts: 1,480 Member
    Blood pressure is NO JOKE! See the doctor!

    But to start, just start with 10 min at a time. Just walking. If you don't want to go outside, walk in place while watching TV. If you think 10 min is too much, start with walking during the commercials during a program that you like to watch.

    And remember...YOU ARE WORTH IT!!
  • Crochetluvr
    Crochetluvr Posts: 3,285 Member
    I agree with starting small...that's what I did. First I wanted to get under 200. Then I wanted to get to where I was before the year before...did that. Then I wanted to get to my half way point...did that. Then down to my lowest before I got real heavy and I did that. Each increment was 10-15 pounds. My next goal is my last....12 more pounds. DONT BE AFRAID of losing....be afraid of NOT losing. Your kids need a healthy mom. And DO talk to your doctor....you wont be the first, or the last person he/she will see who needs to lose a lot of weight. And remember....there are people here that have had to lose even more than you. :)
  • jimbridgman
    jimbridgman Posts: 8
    You can do this. I started out with over 100 pound to lose. I am down about 70 pounds now, and still going.

    I had high blood pressure, I have had type 1 diabetes since I was 1.5 years old, and in the last 12 years had stopped eating right and felt crappy just like you I was afraid to see a doctor as well.

    I found a great doctor, who encouraged me to just start slowly, by taking a walk around my block in the evening and to move more like fidgit when I am sitting at my desk. He also said to make small changes at a time, like eat less carbs, not stop eating them, just eat less of them, and more fiber and veggies too. Then after a few months of that I lost 15 pounds and he suggested I find a good exercise program that I like and do that. I picked P90X (was probably a bad idea, but I did it anyway and it was very hard, but I LOVED it), then I started Insanity and more P90X and I can not get enough exercise now. I walk at night and still do my other programs. I eat more food now that I have in 20 years, and it is healthy, and I feel great.

    Again start with small changes, everyone needs to take things as they can and do what they can, and it will fall into place, if you keep at it, no matter how hard it may seem. Baby steps is the best way to think about it. You doctor is the only one who can really give you a go ahead, to do any exercise, or how to make healthful changes, if you are feeling like this. Please seek your doctor's help ASAP, it is not scary, I promise.
  • ltowne
    ltowne Posts: 129 Member
    PLEASE take the first step and see a doctor! One small step at a time will soon turn into small accomplishments and it will make you realize how strong you really are. Fatigue can be related to depression or a mirage of other things. Some blood work and a general physical can be the starting point. Call and make an appointment TOMORROW! You can do it!!! Add me as a friend if you wish and I will support you all the way.
  • tanyaslosingit
    tanyaslosingit Posts: 178 Member
    Yep, it *is*scary, but it's even scarier *not* to do something about it. Please take the first step and see a doctor. It's amazing how the first move breaks the cycle and how everything starts to fall into place once you know exactly what you're dealing with and how to get there! Courage! :-)
  • marieann82
    marieann82 Posts: 150 Member
    FIrst thing tomorrow morning, call your doctor or make an appointment with a therapist, please!

    You said you had something occur that has been hard for you to move past-and I think it would be best to talk to somebody about how it has been effecting you. Staying at home, having no energy, gaining weight can all be symptoms of depression. You deserve a more fulfilling life! Your kids need you-all of you! It is a hard first step, but please take it!
  • CaddieMay
    CaddieMay Posts: 356 Member
    Feel free to add me as a friend. Then, first thing tomorrow morning, call a doctor and make an appointment to get yourself checked out. Face that fear first of all. The rest is just a whole series of small steps. You can do this! I believe in you! :bigsmile:
  • Mummyadams
    Mummyadams Posts: 1,125 Member
    I don't usually respond to posts like this but please see your doctor, get your health checked and if needed, get some meds to stabiize your moods. You have children so this resounded with me - you need to be healthy and happy for them - please seek help. Feel free to add me as a friend.
  • CatMcCheesey
    CatMcCheesey Posts: 143
    Are you going to see a doctor? Are you able to?
  • shadow2soul
    shadow2soul Posts: 7,692 Member
    I know you said you didn't want to, but it would be a really good idea for you to see a doctor. Elevated blood pressure is very dangerous and should not be taken lightly. Before making any dramatic changes to diet or exercise, it is always best to consult a doctor.

    On the plus side, just posting here is a step in the right direction. Even if you don't know where to start, being able to admit that you want to change is the first step and can sometimes be the hardest.

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