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My Cat Scratched My Baby...I Need Advice

AlongCame_Molly

My cat scratched my 14-month old toddler in the face last night, narrowly missing his EYE. She has never liked children, and we knew that, but last night the door to where she hides from our boy when he tries to play with her was closed. This can never happen again. One half of an inch higher, and my son would be in the hospital right now, being fitted with an eye patch. His life would be ruined forever.

My options as I see them:

*Give her away. I don't know of anyone who would want a cranky old brat cat that hates children, so that would probably mean a no-kill shelter for her. That would break my heart.

*Make her an outdoor cat. SHe has little to NO outdoor skills, and between her yowling outside the door to get back in, and joining the pack of wild cats that infests our apartment complex, this option seems pretty irresponsible. Plus, it wouldn't solve the problem; what if she just went and scratched somebody ELSE'S kid and blinded them? :noway:

*Declawing her. I've always been sort of against this procedure, as I feel it's inhumane and usually unnecessary, and putting my six-year old adult cat through a painful and whoppingly traumatic surgery (that is usually only done on small babies) that could very well depress her and alter her personalty for the rest of her life, well, that also breaks my heart.

If we get rid of her, we will get a replacement baby kitten, that we will raise to be comfortable around small children. The cost of vaccinating spaying/neutering it will be probably more than what we'll be charged for declawing Elphaba. So cost isn't really a factor in our decision.

Has anyone been in a similar situation, and had to make this decision? What did you do? Your thoughts? (Please no douche or smart-alec comments, like "I'll taker her, my snake needs food" or "just get a dog". I have enough on my plate right now without dealing with internet jerks. I'm not in the mood. Serious advice, only please.) Thanks!

Replies

squirrelzzrule22

Yikes you guys are sensitive! I used to pester the cat ALL the time when I was really little and that little feline scratched the crap out of me. My mom would wash out the cut and tell me to stop pestering the cat. There was NONE of this freaking out involved. Give the cat a space or room it can be alone in if you are seriously concerned it is going to do serious damage but its not a wild tiger, its not going to prey on the kids so the real concern is kids being kids and running around pulling its tail and whacking it and all the other things that ANY normal kid would do when trying to play. A house cat is simply NOT going to kill a child or seriously maim it. A scratch, even near or on the eye, is not going to destroy your kid as long as its properly washed (kitty claws are nasty.) There are definitely ways to keep them both safe. Give the cat a space it can be alone, raise your kid to not pester animals. I know he's not old enough yet, but it seriously shouldn't be that hard to separate them. I'm massively perplexed by this entire thread.

Lifting_Knitter

We had to get rid of ours because her jealousy was so high and she kept attacking everyone. It was hard but she really was angry (prior abused animal) and we couldn't handle it.

melbot24

"If you do get her declawed, you may also want to rip out your child's fingernails so that they can't scratch themselves. It's only fair."

Seriously?
Gosh, cat people can be such weirdos.

odusgolp

I fear this.
My daughter is only 5m old - and so far my cats just keep away from her. I hope this continues to be the case. They dont loathe her - but they never stay in the same room.

I had those glue on caps for the claws. Two of my 3 cats - they didnt shed off properly and the nail grew so long it was pushing into the pads on their feet - I had to chew them off.
The other chewed her own off in a couple days - so not always a good solution.

I do however clip my cats nails routinely.

Wait a minute... you CHEWED on your cats claws??? How did this ever even become an option? Gross. :huh: :noway:

WHOA. How did we miss this! This is WAY more fun to critique than the OP. :glasses:

msaestein1

You made a commitment to the cat when you brought it home. I understand that you want to keep your kid safe, but that means making sure the cat has an escape route or a "safe zone". In my opinion, getting rid of your cat isn't an option.

BUT, I'll tell you that I had a cat for 16 years that was the meanest thing that ever lived. He bit me all the time, we weren't allowed to pet him (my husband could sometimes, but never me), often I'd be asleep and would wake up to him biting me through the comforter so hard he broke skin because my leg accidentally touched where he was sleeping. A few times he went nuts and acted feral, attacking us and acting like he didn't know us. We had a vet visit after the first time and they couldn't find anything, the other times we had to have them do a house call to sedate him. No vet could explain it, but the closest thing we got to an answer was that there was just something wrong with his head.

Since we brought him home as a kitten, so tiny he fit into the palm of my hand, we committed to taking care of him. Getting rid of him was never an option.

When I had my son the cat learned to hide, my son learned to avoid the cat, once my son was bitten so hard it broke skin and we had to have a course of antibiotics, but for 4 years we made it work and my son learned not to bother the cat. When he was too young to understand this we used a baby gate with a cut out place in the bottom so the cat could go in and out of our bedroom (his safe zone) and my son couldn't get in there. He died last year of cancer, when he got sick we did everything we could for him because we chose to bring him home 16 years before and that was a commitment we made, in the end he could no longer eat or walk and we had to have him put down. It was really sad, and even though he was a beast, we miss him. I would never get another cat again because of this experience (not a kitten, at least), but when you make a commitment to an animal you don't have the right to throw them away just because you changed something in your life. We moved a lot, we sometimes had to pay more to keep him, we sometimes had to pass up beautiful apartments because they didn't allow cats, but getting rid of our cat was never an option. I volunteer at a shelter and the number of people who take on a pet and then dump it when they decide they want something else in life makes me sick. I met a dog yesterday who was the sweetest thing ever, 8 years old, his family had him since he was a puppy and he never did anything wrong. They dumped him at the shelter because they were moving and didn't want to bother with him, they were just "too busy" to have a dog anymore.

So, make it work.

I commend you and agree with you about not dumping animals. I had a friend who dumped her dog because he would pee when she was at work. if she had trained him the right way, he wouldn't have done it! However, I agree with getting rid of an abusive animal. I could never put up with the abuse you endured from your cat. Sometimes, animals just don't like their owners. I think its not right to 'force' the animal to stay with you in that situation. I know your situation was different, because your cat was sick, but some people have to get rid of abusive pets. You are a better woman than me.

Sweet_Gurl_Next_Door

get rid of the cat

bgelliott

No bainer...good bye kitty! Find the cat a good home with an older family who have grown kids and don't plan to have more!

Rivers2k

If our cat ever did that, he would be dinner.

Agreed!

I love my dog but if it ever harmed my children its all over for the animal! Children are more important than animals.

Iron_Feline

I've not read through all the pages here so I'm unsure what has been said.

Declawing a cat is illegal where I live (in the UK) and with very good reason (in my opinion). It's inhumane and cruel (again, my opinion, we're all entitled to them). Cats use their claws to jump and climb and to hold their food (if you feed chunks of meat, suppose it doesn't apply to dry kibble-y stuff). They are like their fingers. Would you like it if somebody chopped your fingers off?

My two cats are both indoor cats, and I keep their claws regularly trimmed, as they seem to prefer walls and furniture to scratching posts!

It's really important to make sure your child is safe, but it isn't fair to punish your cat for her behaviour either. Make sure that they are supervised when together. Give your cat plenty of hiding places and things to do. Show her love - let her know she isn't second best to this little intruder to her family (that's how she might see it!). If she has a special place she likes to sleep, or a basket, pop one of your baby's blankets in there that smells of him.

I agree with this 100%

I'm also from the UK and here we think de-clawing cats is barbaric and so its been made illegal - as it is in a large number of countries.

melbot24

To further prove my point...

http://www.amazon.com/Crafting-Cat-Hair-Cute-Handicrafts/dp/1594745250

Game8

Cook it for dinner

DanceFittDiva

I fear this.
My daughter is only 5m old - and so far my cats just keep away from her. I hope this continues to be the case. They dont loathe her - but they never stay in the same room.

I had those glue on caps for the claws. Two of my 3 cats - they didnt shed off properly and the nail grew so long it was pushing into the pads on their feet - I had to chew them off.
The other chewed her own off in a couple days - so not always a good solution.

I do however clip my cats nails routinely.

Wait a minute... you CHEWED on your cats claws??? How did this ever even become an option? Gross. :huh: :noway:

WHOA. How did we miss this! This is WAY more fun to critique than the OP. :glasses:

AGREED! I keep re-reading her comment thinking I must have misread the fact that she chewed on her cat's claws. How does one even come up with that as an option first of all... and secondly how do you rationalize that it's ok?

vtmoon

Don't see what the problem is. Cat vs child? Child wins every time.

Had a similar situation with a cat many years ago. I took it for a ride. Had a dog that liked to dig around my gas pipe. Took her for a ride. Nobody in my family ever called me on it. They didn't want to go for a ride.

Thanks I spilled all over.

fluffyfoxx

I am starting my own sanctuary for cats who are abandoned and I am against giving your cat away just because you now have a baby. My biggest pet peeve with people who own pets is that they think they can just get rid of it when they do not need it or want it anymore. You cat loves you and whether you think so or not and it will be confused and heart broken if you give it up. Your cat doesn't understand what it did was wrong it probably has never seen another baby in its life. I am also against declawing, it can lead to all sorts of problems with the way the walk and your cat could become even more violent because it now has to use a different method of protecting its self. I would also not force your cat outdoors. This could lead to being hit by a car, shot by a neighbor, killed by a dog, eaten by an owl (yes owls eat cats) and many other things. It would be scarey and scaring for your cat. Animals have feelings too they just aren't as advanced as a humans.

My suggestion would be to train your cat to behave around your baby. First off reassuring your pet while someone else is holding your baby that the baby is not a threat. Be nice to your cat, speak to it in soothing tones. Let it be in the same room but keep it a good distance away from the baby, so it can not scratch again. The casually and slowly let your pet get closer to the baby. You can't just expect a cat to know what your baby is or think that it is safe. If you still can't get it to work I would suggest to try cat calming spray which you can spray around the babies room to give your cat a sense of calm when it is near the baby.

Pets are work just like babies are. They are just a little more independent. I know it is upsetting but your cat loves you and I sure if it could talk and understand you it would be sorry for scratching your offspring. If you need any more advice or you have any questions for me I would be happy to answer them. I hope your baby is ok and I hope you can continue to love your cat.

Briargrey

I had a cat with 4 kids under the age of 23 months wandering around the house. I had not declawed her, despite numerous issues (clawed the hell out of our speakers, couch, legs, whatever she could except her claw posts), and with child #1, she was fine - he cornered her once while learning to crawl, she batted him in the face with claws in, and he never did it again. Child 2 while learning to crawl decided to keep crawling after the cat, so after numerous bats in face, she resorted to claws a few times. I figured once would be enough to learn, but it wasn't. He just kept doing it. I was on bedrest, pregnant with twins, and I finally made the hard choice to declaw her. I couldn't keep letting him get scratched. I kept trying to teach him NOT to do the activities that were resulting in the bats to the face, but at 9 months, lets face it, sometimes they just aren't going to get it

My cat adapted instantly! She never had any issues. She never looked at me like I was evil (well, for the declawing. Between the kids and the parrots, I sometimes got death-glares from her). She continued to "claw" up our furniture and speakers, but now, it was only an annoying noise, not a ruination of expensive things. Child 2 learned to treat the cat appropriately, no permanent damage was done to him (he's got a small scar on his forehead, but nothing major), and the cat was actually better for us without her claws.

I didn't do it because I thought it would be cruel, but I suffered through 3 years of furniture dismemberment and possible damage to more precious children, only to find out in the end, it didn't bother her one dang bit. I wished I'd done it years before!

Bear in mind though, she was PURELY an indoors cat. She never went outside. She RAN from the outside. If she had to do double-duty as indoor/outdoor cat, then declawing could have been bad for her from a protection standpoint.

sherrirb

I'll start by saying I love my pets.

However, your HUMAN family needs must come first. Declaw or get rid of it.

There is nothing wrong with declawing a cat. I've had several over the years and declawed only the ones that scratched a lot. When they played or fought with each other, they still used their paws in defense.

If your cat doesn't normally bite at you or your son then he or she wont after she is declawed either. Not every animal will sit

Humans take precedence, period. If you aren't willing to accept this point first and foremost, you shouldn't have pets if you have a family.

1ConcreteGirl

You called her a "cranky old brat" cat and said the cat almost blinded your baby.

I think you know the answer here.

Figure out which you like better, the baby or the cat. Find a home for the loser.

nygrl4evr

i'm not really a cat person so maybe i'm suggesting something impossible, but could another option be to talk to a vet or some kind of animal trainer, to determine if there's a way you could gradually get your cat to warm up to your little boy? or maybe this suggestion is even crazier, but i think they do have medication now that you can get for your pets for anxiety (through the vet)...maybe that would make her a little less scared of him.

This, we put our cat on antidepressants for a while while living at my Mom's house (she was letting my mother's cat harass her terribly and wouldn't fight back, instead she hid under a sofa, wouldn't let anyone near her, and was suffering from food anxiety) and it made a world of difference in her whole attitude. She started coming out more often, even sleeping on the same bed as the cat she hated so much. I also recommend keeping the nails clipped and trying the soft claws too.

ladymiseryali

Declawing is sick.

You can file your cats claws down and have those soft paws put on. They are rubber claw caps. You will need to it once a month but it works and doesn't bother the cat.

THIS. Both of my cats get their nails trimmed once to twice a month. Soft paws is also another option to consider. Don't punish your cat because she felt threatened by your son and was defending herself(in her mind she was. I'm not saying your son was out to hurt her, as he is too young to understand that she may not like being bothered by him). Making her an outdoor cat is a dumb solution IMO. Outdoor cats don't live as long as indoor cats. Plus, they can get killed or injured.

parys1

What do you want to tell your child when they grow up without an eye? Declawing would have been mean to the cat?? Gee thanks mom.

That's my reasoning exactly.:/

You are reacting to an injury to your child and I understand. I mentioned before about having a grumpy cat before having my children and how we had to teach the kids how to respect the animal, and to give the cat an escape route. Just keep in mind that the cat did not go after your son. It did not stalk and attack, it swiped when threatened. Watch your cat and evaluate its behaviour, learn to read its body language. They tell a story with their responses and should you learn to read them, you will head off problems before they happen. Our cat never bared her claws to get the kids. She batted them away and scratches occurred if we hadn't kept her nails trimmed enough. Our fault. I was watching her for signs of aggression and being territorial, and she never was.

If you are experiencing this level of stress, I think a new home for the cat may be in order. Just, please, do not replace it with another cat. These things happen and if you are unwilling to supervise their encounters and teach your children how to handle pets, perhaps pets are not for you at this time.

Myndi73

I don't think it is fair to replace your cat with another kitten. You're just perpetuating the idea that pets are disposable if they do something you don't like or agree with. I understand the risk to your baby, but think of the emotional trauma it may have to your cat.

Consider this, the new kitten you get may in the end decide it does not like your baby either.

I would accept responsibility for the one you have, or find a loving home for it elsewhere.

Animals are a lifetime commitment. I won't declaw a cat unless absolutely necessary. Which, it sounds like may be the case for you. I'm assuming this has happened more than once? If you are even considering getting "rid" of this cat, please don't adopt another one.

Lift_This_

call jackson galaxy and he can help you with your cat...you know he is the cat from hell guy...try animal planet.com

AlongCame_Molly

secondly - and i know i'm going to get flamed, i don't care - this is where you can also try that crazy thing called "being a parent". TEACH your kid not to touch the cat. or to be GENTLE with the cat when they start to warm up to each other. toddlers are loud and they grab and they hurt - the cat isn't gonna like that (shocking i know). so sit down and TEACH THE KID to be gentle and to be quiet. teach your kid how to interact with the cat.

.

Are you serious? Did you actually just blame the 14 month old baby for getting scratched by the cat?? Or blame the OP for being a bad parent?? That is a load of crap. 14 month olds are very curious. They are going to test boundaries. That baby did not deserve to get scratched in the face because the cat is an a**hole!! We have a pecking order in our house and the dog falls well below the kids. I don't care what my kids do to our dog (he's just a puppy), he better NEVER scratch or bite them. He knows that and knows it well. If he ever scratched or bit any of our kids, he'd be gone. Easy as that. My kids are a heck of a lot more important. The CAT in this case needs to know better, no matter what.

Thank you. I can't believe how badly I'm getting flamed on my parenting skills over here, it's ridiculous.

dare2love81

What do you want to tell your child when they grow up without an eye? Declawing would have been mean to the cat?? Gee thanks mom.

That's my reasoning exactly.:/

Because you're using reason and logic and you don't think cats are more important than people.

Don't listen to these people, many of them are seriously telling you to get rid of your child in favor of the cat.

I said before people with pets remind me of abused spouses, making excuses for why the animal would act that way and wanting you to teach your child how to behave around the cat so IT doesn't attack again.

F that. Get rid of the cat and raise your child without fear that it'll lose an eye because the cat decided it didn't want to be in a room with a closed door. If you wouldn't accept that sort of behavior from a person in your life why tolerate it from an animal?

I agree with most of this, however I also strongly believe that children need to be taught to respect animals. I can't tell you how many times I've seen kids of all ages walk up to a stray or find an animal outside and think it's okay to "play" with these critters and end up getting scratched and/or bitten multiple times. I'm not saying OP should put the cat before the kid, but at the same time, one scratch when the cat was trying to defend itself does not mean you should toss the cat out to fend for itself.

Bottom line, OP, don't leave the kid in the room unsupervised with the cat. And as I said in a previous post, unless the cat starts attacking the kid (unprovoked), find a way to work it out. Or ask around to friends and family and see if you can find a home for the cat yourself. Please don't resort to a shelter. You knew that the cat didn't like kids...no offense but you should've been a little more prepared for this, either by finding the cat a home prior to bringing the child in, or by making sure the cat was not left with the child unsupervised.

MRMCCRACKEN

I had an older stray show up, and we had him declawed. It didn't bother him a bit, but IF you declaw them they must forever be an "inside " cat.

KatrinaWilke

Yikes you guys are sensitive! I used to pester the cat ALL the time when I was really little and that little feline scratched the crap out of me. My mom would wash out the cut and tell me to stop pestering the cat. There was NONE of this freaking out involved. Give the cat a space or room it can be alone in if you are seriously concerned it is going to do serious damage but its not a wild tiger, its not going to prey on the kids so the real concern is kids being kids and running around pulling its tail and whacking it and all the other things that ANY normal kid would do when trying to play. A house cat is simply NOT going to kill a child or seriously maim it. A scratch, even near or on the eye, is not going to destroy your kid as long as its properly washed (kitty claws are nasty.) There are definitely ways to keep them both safe. Give the cat a space it can be alone, raise your kid to not pester animals. I know he's not old enough yet, but it seriously shouldn't be that hard to separate them. I'm massively perplexed by this entire thread.

:drinker:

DawnieB1977

Personally I'd never put my kids at risk and I would rehome the cat. A young toddler does not understand. You could always get the cat back when your toddler is older.

lorib75

Really? I wouldn't want to be the mom who put the cat before my child. :ohwell:

AsellusReborn

My cat has scratched my son on multiple occasions, never with the intent to hurt him, but merely as a byproduct of her swiping at him.

She's never been big on kids (namely loud, screechy kids like my kiddo), and we knew this when we had our son. But giving her away was never an option, and frankly, my son eventually needed to know that you need to respect the personal space of animals as well as people.

Unfortunately, he's going on 3, and has selective hearing, LOL.

So when we tell him, "Ben, leave Sabrina alone," and he doesn't, and continues to pester her, yeah, he gets a little scratch on the leg or hand or arm. He gets his feelings hurt more than anything, we clean it up and put an Angry Birds bandage on the scratch.

As time has gone on, though, he's learning more and more to just leave her alone. If it had been more of an issue, say, if she were scratching him out of pure evil malice, yeah, we'd take more drastic measures.

What it sounds like is your cat was scared and reacted because you guys didn't make sure his perceived "safety" was handled. That's more operator error than kitty's fault, in my opinion.

Take the time to really socialize your cat with baby, to show your baby that firstly, kitty needs their boundaries respected, and to show kitty that, despite the loud noises, baby is mostly harmless. Getting rid of a cat because of something like this is really unfair to the cat.

I'm going to second this.

Also, getting a kitten doesn't mean your kiddo won't get scratched - kids need supervision with all animals, even gentle, well-socialized-with-kids ones. Kids do not have good judgment yet, they need parents for filters. We have 3 cats, 2 11 years old and a 1 year old that we got at 6 weeks old. The older run away from my 4 year old, but if the 1 year rough houses with my daughter, she does get scratched. He's assertive enough to say that no, yanking a tail when you think Mommy isn;t looking is NOT tolerable, tyvm.

If you feel like you -have- to do something, the declawing is the least of your evils imo, but I think the solution is just that honestly - you have to get in your kid's face and teach him. Babies just can't have unsupervised access to animals because bad things can happen even with the nicest most well trained animals. It's not your fault as a parent because there are always going to be those moments when your little one gleefully misbehaves - it's part of growing up - but blaming the cat who is reacting to your child invading their space is not the right one imo. (It'd be different if kitty sought baby out - that would be aggressive and a different issue.)

iWaffle

I am starting my own sanctuary for cats who are abandoned and I am against giving your cat away just because you now have a baby. My biggest pet peeve with people who own pets is that they think they can just get rid of it when they do not need it or want it anymore.