List of things worth living for.
Replies
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after years of trying to have a baby our daughter died in childbirth. we tried again and i went on to have 3 miscarriages. we are no longer trying to have children.
i have some extremely dark days - i get up & get moving for my husband and my pets (1 dog & 4 cats).
people say it gets better with time but i haven't found any relief from the nightmare yet.0 -
Many people feel suicidal at times and it is not selfish. It is a natural reaction to bad circumstances. I'm sorry you have been feeling badly for so long.
If you have started writing your own list of things worth living for, please share. Those will of course mean more to you than anyone else's list.
Warm wishes that you find some good reasons and hang in here until one day (hopefully soon!) you begin to feel a little less terrible and maybe even not so bad.
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Many people feel suicidal at times and it is not selfish. It is a natural reaction to bad circumstances. I'm sorry you have been feeling badly for so long.
If you have started writing your own list of things worth living for, please share. Those will of course mean more to you than anyone else's list.
Warm wishes that you find some good reasons and hang in here until one day (hopefully soon!) you begin to feel a little less terrible and maybe even not so bad.
sometimes chemicals, not circumstances..0 -
My husband
My family and friends
To see my (future) children and grandchildren grow
Laughing
Dancing
Star Gazing
The ocean
Comfortable Pjs and cuddling on the couch.
The smell of freshly cut grass or growing flowers
Chocolate0 -
all the experiences you have yet to have.
all the places you have yet to go.
all the people you have yet to meet.
all the friends you have yet to make.
all the smiles you have yet to give.
all the laughs you have yet to enjoy.
all the foods you have yet to taste.
all the music you have yet to hear.
in short, everything that you will see, do, feel, hear, experience, and enjoy for the rest of your life.
you are just 21. you still have a long bucket list... a very long bucket list.
life is worth living for.0 -
I have been getting help for YEARS.. much to peoples' dismay you can't just 'think positive' and everything will be ok again.. Just like you wouldn't tell a cancer patient to think positive and they would be cured.
I've found a lot of people really don't understand depression. Sometimes the "biggest" thing you do all day is breath, and that's exhausting. http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/ has some really insightful posts on depression, also, it is funny as hell. I have cried with laughter more than once reading it.
You said you weren't just on ADs, but I'd still suggest talking to the doc and trying a variety of meds. Do you like your counselor/are they effective? Shop around for another, therapists are like boyfriends/girlfriends, you rarely find the one for you right off the bat and as you change so do your needs and its okay to "break up" and find another one who is better for you where you are now.
I've been in some version of your shoes, I've spent years dealing with/denying/ignoring depression, if you want to talk feel free to PM me.0 -
My worst days I do something similar to Laches, but I go to the beach and take in the power of the ocean. It just floors me that that water allowes for all life on Earth to exist and I am lucky enough that I get to be part of it.If you're struggling, please seek help. You are not alone. You're never alone.
I'd also like to second this, though. Please know that you mean a lot to the people you are close to, and they want to keep you in their lives.0 -
I haven't had my family tell me I'm better off dead, but I'm MUCH better off without my family. Every time I visit, I go crazy and see a side of myself I have not regularly seen since I lived there. It's... sad. I don't get along with either of my brothers, and nothing I do is ever good enough. Growing up, I was regularly told I'm fat and ugly and will never make anything of myself. And people wonder why I'm fat, self-conscious, and have low self-esteem... All three have gotten much better lately, because...........
...... I was mildly psychologically abused growing up, and still bear the scars of that with some depression on occasion. I was thisclose to being aborted, but the nurse at the abortion clinic was a friend of my (adoptive) mother, and told the lady that she had a couple who wanted to adopt who had been trying for years to have a baby but couldn't. My (biological) mother said ok, and everything went through. I have told myself there was a reason my life was spared. Someone, somewhere was looking out for me that day, and it's my job to live and find that reason.
Something that I think about when I'm sad is the refugees I've had the pleasure of working with, and their stories. Running for your life across a border while your family is being shot and killed around you. Being forced to leave your homeland and resettle in a country where you don't know the culture or the language. Never being able to go back to your country. Nothing I have - or don't have - can compare to that.
Have you tried volunteering with the less fortunate at all? Not only does it help them, it's amazing how much it can help the person who is volunteering.0 -
Five weeks ago I had brain surgery for a rare condition called Chiari Malformation. I haven't shared this part much, because I didn't want to alarm my friends on here. I could have died had the condition been slightly worse. I wasn't afraid of dying. I was TERRIFIED of what would be left behind, my husband and son, the rest of my family, my friends. People hurt when people close to them die. Your pain can be worked through. It might take time, you have to trust the process, just like I trusted that my surgery would be successful. Be strong.0
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OP, you asked for reasons to keep living, and many of us have given them, but you are focussing on the posts you disagree with. Please take a step back and recognise that you were given what you asked for.
If you want to feel better, hold the positive things close to you and stop concentrating on why you will continue to feel badly.
You asked for something. You got it. Have a think about those things.0 -
I have been getting help for YEARS.. much to peoples' dismay you can't just 'think positive' and everything will be ok again.. Just like you wouldn't tell a cancer patient to think positive and they would be cured.
I've found a lot of people really don't understand depression. Sometimes the "biggest" thing you do all day is breath, and that's exhausting. http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/ has some really insightful posts on depression, also, it is funny as hell. I have cried with laughter more than once reading it.
You said you weren't just on ADs, but I'd still suggest talking to the doc and trying a variety of meds. Do you like your counselor/are they effective? Shop around for another, therapists are like boyfriends/girlfriends, you rarely find the one for you right off the bat and as you change so do your needs and its okay to "break up" and find another one who is better for you where you are now.
I've been in some version of your shoes, I've spent years dealing with/denying/ignoring depression, if you want to talk feel free to PM me.
Yeah. AD's, mood stabiliser, and seroquel for sleep due to my PTSD0 -
Cats.
And frosting.0 -
OP, you asked for reasons to keep living, and many of us have given them, but you are focussing on the posts you disagree with. Please take a step back and recognise that you were given what you asked for.
If you want to feel better, hold the positive things close to you and stop concentrating on why you will continue to feel badly.
You asked for something. You got it. Have a think about those things.
Well maybe people should have just answered it rather than be rude in the process.0 -
I agree with the poster who suggested making a list of things you are grateful for, although that's hard to do when you're in a down cycle. Sometimes we need to seek out professional help to get us to a place where we can start to heal. It's near impossible to do it on your own if you're truly severely clinically depressed. Once the fog lifts you can work on changing your mindset. So please get help ASAP. This can and will get better!
The thing that has kept me healthy for years and that has helped me grow my happiness over time has been taking some time before bed each night to reflect and show gratitude for the many blessings in my life. Some people would do this through prayer, others might consider meditation. Whatever works for you.
I COULD focus on the negative, but that doesn't solve any problems. Over months and years of practicing gratitude, I've gradually shifted from seeing my life in a mostly hopeless, negative light to now finding almost nothing to complain about. Even the "bad" things have just become learning experiences or challenges for me. Look into hypnotherapy, too. It's amazing how helpful it can be!
My things worth living for: my husband, sunshine, trail running in nature, growing my garden, snugging with critters, baking, non-fiction, naps, finding out what happens next...:flowerforyou:0 -
I have been getting help for YEARS.. much to peoples' dismay you can't just 'think positive' and everything will be ok again.. Just like you wouldn't tell a cancer patient to think positive and they would be cured.
I've found a lot of people really don't understand depression. Sometimes the "biggest" thing you do all day is breath, and that's exhausting. http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/ has some really insightful posts on depression, also, it is funny as hell. I have cried with laughter more than once reading it.
You said you weren't just on ADs, but I'd still suggest talking to the doc and trying a variety of meds. Do you like your counselor/are they effective? Shop around for another, therapists are like boyfriends/girlfriends, you rarely find the one for you right off the bat and as you change so do your needs and its okay to "break up" and find another one who is better for you where you are now.
I've been in some version of your shoes, I've spent years dealing with/denying/ignoring depression, if you want to talk feel free to PM me.
Yeah. AD's, mood stabiliser, and seroquel for sleep due to my PTSD
Good old PTSD. I'm on ambien because otherwise I won't sleep to avoid the nightmares, the ambien helps with that, but sometimes it does this great thing where it traps me in my nightmare and I can't wake up from it and so I'm just stuck there until it wears off. My PTSD is a real pain in the hiney. I get panic attacks when I shower in unfamiliar places, which makes traveling super fun.
Not bipolar or on mood stailisers, but I know a lot of people who are bipolar who have a horrible time on meds for them. There was a documentary done about it, I can't remember the name, but it was on netflix, it was very interesting.
As Contrarian said, you've been given a lot of positives, have you given any of them a thought, or thought about a plan of action, just pick one thing to do tomorrow that will make you happy and then do it again the next day.0 -
Live for Jesus..Read the new testament..I'm a mental health counselor and while I could have recommended several coping techniques I have found that reading Jesus' words is the best therapy out there0
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Love. And not neccessarily the romance stuff, or what you need other people for. Loving the little things in life; the steamy hot cup of tea, the concrete things, the beauty that you can find in things you didn't think were beautiful at all. Maybe even beauty in ugliness. But looking to the future and thinking of how things will get better and no matter what there WILL be a beautiful, sunshiney day out ahead of you can always raise spirits. Sometimes, when I get particularly down, it's because I've lost touch with reality. Finding the concrete things and learning to appreciate them can root me again.0
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OP, you asked for reasons to keep living, and many of us have given them, but you are focussing on the posts you disagree with. Please take a step back and recognise that you were given what you asked for.
If you want to feel better, hold the positive things close to you and stop concentrating on why you will continue to feel badly.
You asked for something. You got it. Have a think about those things.
Well maybe people should have just answered it rather than be rude in the process.
People did. I don't think anyone was rude to you.0 -
Not one person on this thread has been rude.OP, you asked for reasons to keep living, and many of us have given them, but you are focussing on the posts you disagree with. Please take a step back and recognise that you were given what you asked for.
If you want to feel better, hold the positive things close to you and stop concentrating on why you will continue to feel badly.
You asked for something. You got it. Have a think about those things.
Well maybe people should have just answered it rather than be rude in the process.0 -
There has been no rude in this thread. You've been given a lot of helpful and insightful answers.OP, you asked for reasons to keep living, and many of us have given them, but you are focussing on the posts you disagree with. Please take a step back and recognise that you were given what you asked for.
If you want to feel better, hold the positive things close to you and stop concentrating on why you will continue to feel badly.
You asked for something. You got it. Have a think about those things.
Well maybe people should have just answered it rather than be rude in the process.0 -
OP, you asked for reasons to keep living, and many of us have given them, but you are focussing on the posts you disagree with. Please take a step back and recognise that you were given what you asked for.
If you want to feel better, hold the positive things close to you and stop concentrating on why you will continue to feel badly.
You asked for something. You got it. Have a think about those things.
Well maybe people should have just answered it rather than be rude in the process.
No one has been rude but several people have reached out to you. If you don't want to call the help line, ponder the positives that you asked for, or take your meds, then pick someone and talk to them.0 -
Good old PTSD. I'm on ambien because otherwise I won't sleep to avoid the nightmares, the ambien helps with that, but sometimes it does this great thing where it traps me in my nightmare and I can't wake up from it and so I'm just stuck there until it wears off. My PTSD is a real pain in the hiney. I get panic attacks when I shower in unfamiliar places, which makes traveling super fun...
OMG! Thanks for the memories! Years ago, my doctor tried to put me on something like that. I took it once, got trapped in a horrific nightmare (because the drug makes it impossible for you to wake yourself up) and swore never to take it again! Talk about panic! I thought I was gonna have a heart attack! :sad:0 -
OP, you asked for reasons to keep living, and many of us have given them, but you are focussing on the posts you disagree with. Please take a step back and recognise that you were given what you asked for.
If you want to feel better, hold the positive things close to you and stop concentrating on why you will continue to feel badly.
You asked for something. You got it. Have a think about those things.
Well maybe people should have just answered it rather than be rude in the process.
No one has been rude but several people have reached out to you. If you don't want to call the help line, ponder the positives that you asked for, or take your meds, then pick someone and talk to them.
No but there have been several which think they know everything about mental illness when there in fact responses are bs.0 -
OP, you asked for reasons to keep living, and many of us have given them, but you are focussing on the posts you disagree with. Please take a step back and recognise that you were given what you asked for.
If you want to feel better, hold the positive things close to you and stop concentrating on why you will continue to feel badly.
You asked for something. You got it. Have a think about those things.
Well maybe people should have just answered it rather than be rude in the process.
No one has been rude but several people have reached out to you. If you don't want to call the help line, ponder the positives that you asked for, or take your meds, then pick someone and talk to them.
No but there have been several which think they know everything about mental illness when there in fact responses are bs.
How do you know that they haven't felt the way you do? Some people cope with mental illness, and start to feel better. You aren't the only one who has been depressed.0 -
OP, you asked for reasons to keep living, and many of us have given them, but you are focussing on the posts you disagree with. Please take a step back and recognise that you were given what you asked for.
If you want to feel better, hold the positive things close to you and stop concentrating on why you will continue to feel badly.
You asked for something. You got it. Have a think about those things.
Well maybe people should have just answered it rather than be rude in the process.
No one has been rude but several people have reached out to you. If you don't want to call the help line, ponder the positives that you asked for, or take your meds, then pick someone and talk to them.
No but there have been several which think they know everything about mental illness when there in fact responses are bs.
How do you know that they haven't felt the way you do? Some people cope with mental illness, and start to feel better. You aren't the only one who has been depressed.
Who said I was depressed?
No I'm talking about the ones which are like 'think positive and you will be magically cured.'0 -
How do you know that they haven't felt the way you do? Some people cope with mental illness, and start to feel better. You aren't the only one who has been depressed.
So true. I was so depressed in high school I nearly did the deed and ended it. I feel completely different now than I did then, and you probably wouldn't be able to tell that I was ever *that* bad, but I still try to help.
All we're saying is that you're only looking at the negative responses, which is definitely a symptom of your condition. You reaching out and asking for help is a HUGE step, but you need to try to read the responses from those of us who genuinely care and are really trying to help you!
Another huge step: if you ask for help be prepared to have people help.0 -
sorry i'm not used to it because people in the past have always done the complete opposite of help..How do you know that they haven't felt the way you do? Some people cope with mental illness, and start to feel better. You aren't the only one who has been depressed.
So true. I was so depressed in high school I nearly did the deed and ended it. I feel completely different now than I did then, and you probably wouldn't be able to tell that I was ever *that* bad, but I still try to help.
All we're saying is that you're only looking at the negative responses, which is definitely a symptom of your condition. You reaching out and asking for help is a HUGE step, but you need to try to read the responses from those of us who genuinely care and are really trying to help you!
Another huge step: if you ask for help be prepared to have people help.0 -
OP, you asked for reasons to keep living, and many of us have given them, but you are focussing on the posts you disagree with. Please take a step back and recognise that you were given what you asked for.
If you want to feel better, hold the positive things close to you and stop concentrating on why you will continue to feel badly.
You asked for something. You got it. Have a think about those things.
Well maybe people should have just answered it rather than be rude in the process.
No one has been rude but several people have reached out to you. If you don't want to call the help line, ponder the positives that you asked for, or take your meds, then pick someone and talk to them.
No but there have been several which think they know everything about mental illness when there in fact responses are bs.
How do you know that they haven't felt the way you do? Some people cope with mental illness, and start to feel better. You aren't the only one who has been depressed.
Who said I was depressed?
No I'm talking about the ones which are like 'think positive and you will be magically cured.'
No one said that. You asked for reasons to keep living, and people provided some. You sad you feel down and sometimes think about ending it. I think most mental health professionals would consider that depression.
Why are you arguing? You asked for help, and people gave you what you specifically asked for.
Good luck. I hope you feel better.0 -
learning to box
the color yellow
eating an authentic mexican taco
sunshine
a good smutty book
seeing a flag blowing straight out in the wind
the top of the eiffel tower
humming 'amazing grace' while watching my children sleep
cute running skirts
learning to take close-up pictures of flowers
a good hand massage
eating a peanut butter and honey sandwich
digging your feet into the sand
growing heirloom tomatoes
learning to can your own fruit jelly
tiny baby socks
the first taste of moscato
pretty jewelry
driving a nail in the wall to hang a picture
hockey
a sexy man with green eyes and stubble on his chin
holding hands in the theater with my best friend
the color turquoise
funny british comedies on hulu+
my pooch
hope that things will get better0 -
Trees. Watching ocean waves slapping a beach. Sunny days. Spring. Baby animals. Good music. Art. Halloween. Sitting on a patio and watching the people who walk past. A book you can't put down. Warm summer nights with lots of visible stars in the sky. Laughter. Sneezing. Feeling cozy. The way it feels when a plane speeds down the runway. The smell of baking bread.
So many things. We have a beautiful world, and should try to stay here as long as we can. Lift your head, honey. It always gets better.
:flowerforyou: 0
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