No standards anymore?

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245

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  • Smackemdanno
    Smackemdanno Posts: 83 Member
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    Met in September 1993, proposed late October or early November, happily married for 19+ years since March 1994 and every day of marriage gets better and better. If you find the right one it is like Mario Puzo's 'lightning bolt'. Why wait.
  • SueGeer
    SueGeer Posts: 1,169 Member
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    Hubby & I started dating 28/5/82; engaged 2/10/82; married 15/9/84......celebrating our 30th wedding anniversary next year.

    Works for some........
  • 2FatToRun
    2FatToRun Posts: 810 Member
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    So, as I am looking up a friend on Facebook, he just so happens to have the name of a guy I was casually seeing in December/January -he called it off suddenly & I had no idea why -Then last month I saw he was in a relationship with a girl around that time he said "Things weren't going to work out between us" (Didn't know there was a "thing" between us..) ANYWAYS, like I said I was looking up a friend of mine and his name popped up, and I see "Engaged" I'm like WTF! Are there no more NORMAL relationships where you are together for 6 months before the question is popped? I mean how can you know a person well enough to know you want to spend the rest of your life with them in 6 weeks? It's still the Honeymoon phase. I get the "Love at first sight" thing, but I bet that majority of people who become engaged within the first 6 weeks to 6 months don't last 5 years. Can anyone give me some insight to this madness? Tell me I'm wrong & show me proof that I am wrong!?

    LOLLLL! Another highly probable contributor to the ever so high divorce rate lol I have been in a long term relationship for 7 yrs a 6 yr one before that. I refuse to get married even after 7 yrs. You are totally right about speeding into marriage. It is common now because it is acceptable. So sad. Even religious ppl that once forbid divorce now allow it lol The world is going to POOP! I blame it on fast food/junk food ahahahahah jk jk jk Stupid should be painful though HA!
  • XLMuffnTop
    XLMuffnTop Posts: 76 Member
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    I knew i was going to marry my husband from the moment we met. We've been married 14 years this month. But I will add we "lived in sin" for 2 years before getting married. We moved in together after only knowing each other for a month. Neither of us were new to the dating scene by the time we met So we knew what we did and didn't want.

    I'll add my sister and BIL just made 20 years married. They only knew each other a few months before getting engaged and were married within a year of meeting. They have a wonderful relationship.

    This is pretty much how it went with my husband and I except we had our 6 year anniversary last month.

    What others do is no one's business. If they want to get married after only knowing each other a few days, fine. Good on ya. They're the ones that have to slog through a divorce if it doesn't work out, not you. I don't attribute this scenario to an issue of "standards".
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
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    meh, if they are happy and you are happy, then what does it matter?
  • julies90
    julies90 Posts: 646 Member
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    My sister and her husband met and were married with 8 months. Happiest couple I've ever met, still, a couple kids later.
  • Smackemdanno
    Smackemdanno Posts: 83 Member
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    I think we are redefining standards. Grandma and grandpa met, courted and were married for over 50 years. They didn't live together, date for years or in large part didn't get forced into a shotgun marriages. That was standards then. We don't have those kinds of standards today and look what it has done to the family.
  • gerard54
    gerard54 Posts: 1,107 Member
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    I fall in love easy and out of it just as easy haha...
  • n2thenight24
    n2thenight24 Posts: 1,651 Member
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    I fall in love easy and out of it just as easy haha...

    So much this.
  • Cr01502
    Cr01502 Posts: 3,614 Member
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    I think you still want to sleep with him and that is why you are upset.
  • Fox_n_sox
    Fox_n_sox Posts: 283 Member
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    I think you still want to sleep with him and that is why you are upset.

    Lmao..yep. I wanna jump his bones :wink:
  • spike90
    spike90 Posts: 704 Member
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    I started dating my husband in December of 1995 (met him at a new job) and we were married in April 1996. We have been married for 17 years this month.
  • aaronlawrenc
    aaronlawrenc Posts: 666 Member
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    I started dating my husband in December of 1995 (met him at a new job) and we were married in April 1996. We have been married for 17 years this month.

    boom and boom
  • aaronlawrenc
    aaronlawrenc Posts: 666 Member
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    maybe he knocked her up??
  • corn63
    corn63 Posts: 1,580 Member
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    What's it to you? How does this honestly affect your life?


    or are you jealous that it's not you?
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
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    I knew i was going to marry my husband from the moment we met. We've been married 14 years this month. But I will add we "lived in sin" for 2 years before getting married. We moved in together after only knowing each other for a month. Neither of us were new to the dating scene by the time we met So we knew what we did and didn't want.

    That sounds really similar to my husband... I never even believed in love at first sight until I met him... we moved in together after less than a month and got married soon after, and we'll have been married 13 years this year :)

    with some people you just click and get on really well right from the start... I've had that with friendship too, i.e. certain people I just hit it off with and we're like old friends right from the start. Was like that with my husband, just there was physical attraction as well. first day we met we spent the whole time chatting, we're both nerds so you can imagine the kind of conversations, and yes we still have in depth conversations on nerd topics.

    So long as you know enough about the person to know that you're compatible personality wise, and that the other person is not an abusive bully or other red flags for serious issues, there's no reason why you need to have been together for a set number of months before you can possibly know if you're right for each other. Sometimes it just doesn't take that long to know.
  • fitznewme2013
    fitznewme2013 Posts: 31
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    I asked my husband to marry me 3 weeks into our relationship. got married within 3 months. We have been happily married for almost 9 years and have 2 amazing kids together! we were 19 and 20 when we got married.

    I have known people who were together/engaged for 5 years got married and were separated or divorced within a year.

    if your willing to work at a relationship of any kind you can make it work. regardless of how long you are together your going to have issues or problems its just are both parties willing to work together to make it strong, loving, and lasting

    my personal opinion is love who you love and work for it! nothing comes easy!
  • _DaniD_
    _DaniD_ Posts: 2,186 Member
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    They will likely be divorced a year after getting married. 6 months is way to soon to get married.. I mean they probably haven't even farted in front of each other yet.
  • Juliejustsaying
    Juliejustsaying Posts: 2,332 Member
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    meh, Facebook is a mind suck. And frankly, I don't care what anyone thinks about my morality...No offense to OP but why do you care? He's making it legal, so what if they decided they were the one? I thought that once and "the one" apparently meant something different.

    World problems first....what other people do with their freedom doesn't really bother me unless it has a direct effect on my life. Been there recently...:indifferent:
  • LetsTryThisAgain54
    LetsTryThisAgain54 Posts: 381 Member
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    If you're in a happy relationship, why do you even care?

    Exactly! It just sounds like you're upset it wasn't you. Let it go if you're in a happy relationship. Why even worry about him???

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