One year down.

I'm hesitant to post this in success stories. I don't see myself having achieved success yet. I still have a ways to go before I can transition to maintenance mode. However, I have come a long way in the last year. I tend to be a storyteller, and my posts can get long. So, I promised myself I would keep the forum post to a very brief synopsis to prevent people from coming in and saying TL; DR.

I was at my mother’s house on April 8th, 2012 (Easter Sunday). I realized I had hit a new low. I sat and reflected. In the years that I had graduated from my nursing program, I realized I had gotten out of hand. I weighed myself: 280 pounds. I thought of how I couldn’t stand to see myself in pictures anymore. When I had to have a picture taken, I always positioned one of the kids in such a way, that I couldn’t see my belly. I had one pair of jeans that I could squeeze into, and that was work. They were 46x30. All of my XXL t-shirts were now fitting very tightly, and my belly would peek out of the bottom more frequently than not. My dress shirts with an 18.5 inch neck could not even come close to having the top button buttoned. My ties only came to half way up my belly. My expandable dress pants with the elastic expansion in the waist were stretched to the maximum.

My health was being affected in some ways. I couldn’t sleep at night. When I did sleep, it was only by laying on my face. If I slept in any other position, I would snore and wake myself up, I would wake up with pain from the weight putting pressure on my joints, or my diaphragm could not effectively move for me to feel like I was getting enough oxygen. I needed 3 pillows to sit up in bed, or I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I could not sit upright on the floor because I couldn’t’ breathe, or the fat would push me back. I had constant back pain, and felt like I might have been developing a pressure ulcer on my sacrum. My feet constantly ached, and the bones creaked and snapped when I walked.

I had lost my ability to complete my own ADLs. It had been year since I was able to reach my toes. I couldn’t clasp my hands behind my back. My flexibility was shot. I had to have someone else clip my toenails. When I bent to tie my shoes, I couldn’t breathe because my diaphragm was immobilized against the crushing weight of my flab. I would tie one, and rest for a few minutes to catch my breath, and then tie the other. I had to tie them with my fingers outstretched as far as I could just to get to the laces. I had some of my employees offering to tie my shoes for me. When I went to the bathroom, even wiping my own backside was nearly impossible. I couldn’t reach around. I had to use giant wads of toilet paper to get it. That was embarrassing.

So, here I sit at my one year anniversary of the beginning of my hitting rock bottom. I am currently sitting at 195 pounds. That’s 85 pounds down in one year. As I reflect on all the things that have changed in my life over the last year, I am happy with what has happened. My fitness level has increased overall. While I am still technically obese per BMI, I feel a lot better. I can sit upright on the floor and breathe. I can reach behind myself and wash my back. I can wipe my backside without a problem. I can run 3.5 miles on a treadmill at 5.5 MPH without getting winded. I can work an arc trainer or treadmill for 60 minutes at a time. I can swim breaststroke indefinitely without getting winded. I can reach my toes and clip my toenails and tie my own shoes. I can sleep on my back and on my side without waking myself from pain or snoring. People I haven’t seen in 8 months don’t even recognize me, and have to ask who I am. I have gone from needing to wear XXXL shirts and scrubs to wearing larges (I need a medium in my swimsuit now). My neck has lost over 3 inches, my waist 8 inches. I am not done yet.

Like I said above, this is just the abstract. If you are really interested in my whole story, you can view it here (you can view it if you aren't interested too I guess):

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/SpeSHul_SnoflEHk/view/there-and-back-how-i-got-there-and-reflections-on-the-last-year-s-work-515861