Help my wife won't let me make a sammich!

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BeachIron
BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
in Chit-Chat
Every time, I try to make a sammich, she throws me out of the kitchen and tells me no. I hate this. I know that making sammiches will instantly cause me to lose muscle mass and my man card, but I just can't help it. What should I do?
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Replies

  • ihad
    ihad Posts: 7,463 Member
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    Man cave fridge. Hide the sandwich fixings behind the beer.
  • diodelcibo
    diodelcibo Posts: 2,564 Member
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    First massage her then fill her with wine until you can sneak into the kitchen unnoticed.
  • MG_Fit
    MG_Fit Posts: 1,143 Member
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    A couple of things...what would she rather have you eat? Also, why don't you just make it when she leaves the house?
  • iAMsmiling
    iAMsmiling Posts: 2,394 Member
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    That's a tough one.
    On one hand, if you give in and don't make yourself a sammich, then you've allowed her to define what you can and cannot do.
    Bang, there goes the man card.
    On the other hand, if you make your own sammiches instead of telling her to do it...bang, there goes the man card.

    Dude. I think you're just screwed.
  • suv_hater
    suv_hater Posts: 374 Member
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    Handcuff yourself to the refrigerator handle and tell her, "NO, I am not a feminist!"
  • JessieJanie
    JessieJanie Posts: 428
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    You just go in there and do it! You don't need her permission, she can't tell you what to do!
    Make me one while you're in there!
  • iWaffle
    iWaffle Posts: 2,208 Member
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    Be a real man and buy some of those microwaveable frozen burgers. That's what you do when your woman won't make a sammich for you.
  • LauraMacNCheese
    LauraMacNCheese Posts: 7,198 Member
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    That's a tough one.
    On one hand, if you give in and don't make yourself a sammich, then you've allowed her to define what you can and cannot do.
    Bang, there goes the man card.
    On the other hand, if you make your own sammiches instead of telling her to do it...bang, there goes the man card.

    Dude. I think you're just screwed.

    Yes...that is quite the Catch 22...you are pretty much FUBAR...
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
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    That's a tough one.
    On one hand, if you give in and don't make yourself a sammich, then you've allowed her to define what you can and cannot do.
    Bang, there goes the man card.
    On the other hand, if you make your own sammiches instead of telling her to do it...bang, there goes the man card.

    Dude. I think you're just screwed.

    Yes...that is quite the Catch 22...you are pretty much FUBAR...

    It's actually worse than you think. She won't even let me get up and get my own beer anymore. smh
  • MG_Fit
    MG_Fit Posts: 1,143 Member
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    That's a tough one.
    On one hand, if you give in and don't make yourself a sammich, then you've allowed her to define what you can and cannot do.
    Bang, there goes the man card.
    On the other hand, if you make your own sammiches instead of telling her to do it...bang, there goes the man card.

    Dude. I think you're just screwed.

    Yes...that is quite the Catch 22...you are pretty much FUBAR...

    It's actually worse than you think. She won't even let me get up and get my own beer anymore. smh

    That sounds like a win to me!
  • LauraMacNCheese
    LauraMacNCheese Posts: 7,198 Member
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    That's a tough one.
    On one hand, if you give in and don't make yourself a sammich, then you've allowed her to define what you can and cannot do.
    Bang, there goes the man card.
    On the other hand, if you make your own sammiches instead of telling her to do it...bang, there goes the man card.

    Dude. I think you're just screwed.

    Yes...that is quite the Catch 22...you are pretty much FUBAR...

    It's actually worse than you think. She won't even let me get up and get my own beer anymore. smh

    :noway:

    tumblr_lm8joqEpdT1qgk4ado1_500.gif
  • elprincipito
    elprincipito Posts: 1,200 Member
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    dafuq? this is supposed to be funny? :noway:
  • louisey112
    louisey112 Posts: 576 Member
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    I can see how this really transpired:

    sandwich_zpsab94c064.jpg
  • sz8soon
    sz8soon Posts: 816 Member
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    You can't make your own sandwich? You can't get your own beer? :sad: :sad: :sad:

    Next thing you're going to be telling me is you don't even have to ask for BJ's anymore....

    Sounds like you need to put your foot down, this kind of behaviour is unheard of.. and shouldn't be tolerated.
  • ihad
    ihad Posts: 7,463 Member
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    2s6sow7.jpg
  • __RANDY__
    __RANDY__ Posts: 1,036 Member
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    i'd revoke your man card you clearly have no control over your woman, and what were you doing in the kitchen in the first place to get thrown out of it.
  • dmpizza
    dmpizza Posts: 3,321 Member
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    Not clear. Is this a "get out of my kitchen" problem or a "you are fat" problem?
  • iAMsmiling
    iAMsmiling Posts: 2,394 Member
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    That's a tough one.
    On one hand, if you give in and don't make yourself a sammich, then you've allowed her to define what you can and cannot do.
    Bang, there goes the man card.
    On the other hand, if you make your own sammiches instead of telling her to do it...bang, there goes the man card.

    Dude. I think you're just screwed.

    Yes...that is quite the Catch 22...you are pretty much FUBAR...

    It's actually worse than you think. She won't even let me get up and get my own beer anymore. smh

    I have the solution!
    Wife Swap!

    It's a sure bet my wife would never make you a sammich or get you a beer, AND I'm more than willing to give up my man card for that treatment.

    I'll buy the plane tickets.
  • throttle2009
    throttle2009 Posts: 138
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    I can see how this really transpired:

    sandwich_zpsab94c064.jpg


    ^^ this is funny....
  • CorvusCorax77
    CorvusCorax77 Posts: 2,536 Member
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    5724.jpg

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