Office food at a new job
kimmymayhall
Posts: 419 Member
My boyfriend just started a new job. It's in a fancy office and is his first real grownup job. Before he stared they told him they occasionally have catered lunches, mostly when big clients or the CEO is in. Sounds good. His first two days they brought in fried chicken and Mexican food. He brought his lunch today but doesn't want alienate himself from his new colleagues when he is just getting started there. Should he just eat with his coworkers for a few weeks to figure out the office dynamics and start making friends? Would it be weird if everyone is sitting around the conference table enjoying Popeyes together and the new guy pulls out his mug of chili from home? I am very comfortable in my office (7 years) and it is a little bit different working environment, and this is his first experience with coworkers outside of a grad student lounge so we're not really sure of the best course of action.
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My office is kind of like this too - more formal, I'm one of the youngest, and people don't tend to eat very healthy. It can be challenging. I think he should suck it up and eat with his co workers for the first couple of weeks. Maybe encourage him to eat a larger breakfast so it's easier to exercise control with the portions he eats at lunch? Or bring a healthy snack to eat afterward so that if he doesn't feel like he wants to fill up too much on that stuff, he will still have something to hold him over. I'm sure soon he'll be able to get a feel for when/if he can start bringing his own food.
I will say, the one time I went to a lunch meeting and didn't eat anything, I got a lot of weird questions. Luckily, at this point I am pretty comfortable with the people I work with, so it wasn't a big deal, but people definitely noticed.0 -
I think he should eat the food provided and just be really conscious about portion size. There's nothing wrong with eating fast food sparingly as long as you know what to order. If he knows what is going to be catered beforehand, he could quickly skim the nutritional information (if it's available) and try to eat the best options.0
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I really don't see the issue of pulling out his container of homemade chill and eating with them. He can still eat and socialize with them, you don't have to eat the same food to bond. Its kind of an ideal situation, they aren't going to restaurants every day where he wouldn't be able to bring his own lunch and have a hard time making better choices.0
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I'm kind of shocked that people are suggesting he cave in to "peer pressure" and eat unhealthily! Who cares what they think! I'm pretty sure you can't fire someone for wanting to eat healthy. And if they don't like him for not eating fried chicken, that's pretty ridiculous.0
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I really don't see the issue of pulling out his container of homemade chill and eating with them. He can still eat and socialize with them, you don't have to eat the same food to bond. Its kind of an ideal situation, they aren't going to restaurants every day where he wouldn't be able to bring his own lunch and have a hard time making better choices.
This.
Plus as an adult, he should be able to reasonably explain his food choices to his (also adult) coworkers.0 -
I really don't see the issue of pulling out his container of homemade chill and eating with them. He can still eat and socialize with them. You don't have to eat the same food to bond. Its kind of an ideal situation, they aren't going to restaurants every day where he wouldn't be able to bring his own lunch and have a hard time making better choices.
The issue is it's poor workplace etiquette. This is not just a bunch of coworkers eating lunch together. When CEO level people and especially when clients are involved it's just not the proper thing to do. The proper way to handle if you really don't want to eat any of the catered food is to eat your own before or after the group lunch and have a beverage and socialize with people during the meeting.
If it's a small company and you get the vibe that the CEO is friendly enough that it's considered a social lunch among co-workers even when he/she's present than after a while it's probably fine to bring your own food to those lunches, but if you value your career don't walk into a client lunch meeting with your own food.0 -
I really don't see the issue of pulling out his container of homemade chill and eating with them. He can still eat and socialize with them. You don't have to eat the same food to bond. Its kind of an ideal situation, they aren't going to restaurants every day where he wouldn't be able to bring his own lunch and have a hard time making better choices.
The issue is it's poor workplace etiquette. This is not just a bunch of coworkers eating lunch together. When CEO level people and especially when clients are involved it's just not the proper thing to do. The proper way to handle if you really don't want to eat any of the catered food is to eat your own before or after the group lunch and have a beverage and socialize with people during the meeting.
If it's a small company and you get the vibe that the CEO is friendly enough that it's considered a social lunch among co-workers even when he/she's present than after a while it's probably fine to bring your own food to those lunches, but if you value your career don't walk into a client lunch meeting with your own food.
The examples she gave of the past two days sounded like it was a bunch of co-workers sitting together and eating lunch, not a client lunch meeting. I would also not expect a high level meeting to include Popeye's chicken, so I inferred a more relaxed tone to the lunch.0 -
I really don't see the issue of pulling out his container of homemade chill and eating with them. He can still eat and socialize with them. You don't have to eat the same food to bond. Its kind of an ideal situation, they aren't going to restaurants every day where he wouldn't be able to bring his own lunch and have a hard time making better choices.
The issue is it's poor workplace etiquette. This is not just a bunch of coworkers eating lunch together. When CEO level people and especially when clients are involved it's just not the proper thing to do. The proper way to handle if you really don't want to eat any of the catered food is to eat your own before or after the group lunch and have a beverage and socialize with people during the meeting.
If it's a small company and you get the vibe that the CEO is friendly enough that it's considered a social lunch among co-workers even when he/she's present than after a while it's probably fine to bring your own food to those lunches, but if you value your career don't walk into a client lunch meeting with your own food.
The examples she gave of the past two days sounded like it was a bunch of co-workers sitting together and eating lunch, not a client lunch meeting. I would also not expect a high level meeting to include Popeye's chicken, so I inferred a more relaxed tone to the lunch.
Read better.My boyfriend just started a new job. It's in a fancy office and is his first real grownup job. Before he stared they told him they occasionally have catered lunches, mostly when big clients or the CEO is in.0 -
I totally get this.
When I started my new job, there were lunches for some thing or another almost every day. There were lunch meetings, and birthdays, and working lunches. There was Thai food, and Mexican food, and all manner of tempting treats.
Now don't get me wrong, I don't believe in avoiding certain foods, and I don't believe that there are "good" foods and "bad" foods. But when you are faced with an 800-plus calorie lunch every damn day it gets to be a bit much.
So my strategies:
1. Schedule other meetings at lunch.... if it's not a mandatory meeting, I would schedule a work meeting elsewhere so that I would not be faced with all the food.
2. Eat my main meal at lunch. Instead of a big supper I would have a big lunch and then a light supper.
3. Fit in a little extra exercise.
Now after several years, I don't really give a hoot what they think and I eat my salad while they sit there and chow down on whatever the meal of the day is.0 -
Did your boyfriend ask you to post this? I bet he'd love the "his first real grownup job." bit.
I'm thinking a grad student has enough mental capacity to read the situation and respond appropriately, but in case he does not. I would say, have a few lunches with the coworkers (adjust diet and exercise plan accordingly) and when he has a better read on whether they are comfortable with his food decisions, then he brings his own lunch. If it is lunch around the table, casual, there is no reason why he can't bring his own and sit with them to eat it.
In fact, it may earn brownie points for having cohones enough to care about his food choices. Or not.0 -
I really don't see the issue of pulling out his container of homemade chill and eating with them. He can still eat and socialize with them. You don't have to eat the same food to bond. Its kind of an ideal situation, they aren't going to restaurants every day where he wouldn't be able to bring his own lunch and have a hard time making better choices.
The issue is it's poor workplace etiquette. This is not just a bunch of coworkers eating lunch together. When CEO level people and especially when clients are involved it's just not the proper thing to do. The proper way to handle if you really don't want to eat any of the catered food is to eat your own before or after the group lunch and have a beverage and socialize with people during the meeting.
If it's a small company and you get the vibe that the CEO is friendly enough that it's considered a social lunch among co-workers even when he/she's present than after a while it's probably fine to bring your own food to those lunches, but if you value your career don't walk into a client lunch meeting with your own food.
The examples she gave of the past two days sounded like it was a bunch of co-workers sitting together and eating lunch, not a client lunch meeting. I would also not expect a high level meeting to include Popeye's chicken, so I inferred a more relaxed tone to the lunch.
Read better.My boyfriend just started a new job. It's in a fancy office and is his first real grownup job. Before he stared they told him they occasionally have catered lunches, mostly when big clients or the CEO is in.
I read just fine.
Not always.Before he stared they told him they occasionally have catered lunches, mostly when big clients or the CEO is in.
The rest goes on to sayHis first two days they brought in fried chicken and Mexican food. He brought his lunch today but doesn't want alienate himself from his new colleagues when he is just getting started there. Should he just eat with his coworkers for a few weeks to figure out the office dynamics and start making friends? Would it be weird if everyone is sitting around the conference table enjoying Popeyes together and the new guy pulls out his mug of chili from home?
No mention of big clients or CEO. Again, wouldn't expect a catered high level CEO lunch meeting to include Popeyes.
It sounded to me like he was expecting to do occasional catered lunch meetings but it turns out that the staff often eats together under other circumstances as well.0 -
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Eat the company provided food, just control portions. Make it fit in his macros.
Once he's been there long enough, perhaps he can pick and choose when to eat the provided food or not. Some workplace cultures really emphasize that sort of group activity and he really does need to be part of the group.0 -
I understand the peer pressure here, but it really isnt on!!
I would "invent" a food allergy - say that you can't eat such and such as it makes you feel ill. Then take in your own stuff and eat along with your colleagues. I did this successfully for three months away on a legal course where every meal was corporate catering and my "allergy" prevented me from eating carbs and fats. After a few "oohs and ahhs" everyone forgot about it and saved me all the salads!.
good luck to him.!0 -
I say he eat what he wants. He shouldn't have to cave into peer pressure and eat something he wouldn't eat normally. Nothing wrong with occasionally eating the "provided food" but if he's trying to be healthy and change his eating habits, say so!0
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He can still eat with the group until he's comfortable enough to bring his own food. I agree, make lunch your main meal, but you can still eat Popeyes. Take the skin off. Don't eat a biscuit. Eat 1/2 the amount of mashed potatoes and twice the vegetables providing they're not soaking in butter.0
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I really don't see the issue of pulling out his container of homemade chill and eating with them. He can still eat and socialize with them. You don't have to eat the same food to bond. Its kind of an ideal situation, they aren't going to restaurants every day where he wouldn't be able to bring his own lunch and have a hard time making better choices.
The issue is it's poor workplace etiquette. This is not just a bunch of coworkers eating lunch together. When CEO level people and especially when clients are involved it's just not the proper thing to do. The proper way to handle if you really don't want to eat any of the catered food is to eat your own before or after the group lunch and have a beverage and socialize with people during the meeting.
If it's a small company and you get the vibe that the CEO is friendly enough that it's considered a social lunch among co-workers even when he/she's present than after a while it's probably fine to bring your own food to those lunches, but if you value your career don't walk into a client lunch meeting with your own food.
It sucks but I have to agree with this. I worked at a company like this right out of grad school and there's no way I would've tried to eat my own food during these catered lunches.0 -
I understand the peer pressure here, but it really isnt on!!
I would "invent" a food allergy - say that you can't eat such and such as it makes you feel ill. Then take in your own stuff and eat along with your colleagues. I did this successfully for three months away on a legal course where every meal was corporate catering and my "allergy" prevented me from eating carbs and fats. After a few "oohs and ahhs" everyone forgot about it and saved me all the salads!.
good luck to him.!
And if his grown up colleagues found out that he would rather lie to them about allergies instead of manning up and just saying he'd rather bring his own lunch...
well, that would reflect wonderfully on his integrity.0 -
It's a good thing they didn't order sandwiches. How would he get the crust off all by himself?0
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My thought is that if they're having Popeye's; own lunch should be fine. If it's truly catered and formal with a client, make wise choices from what's being served. Also, it's entirely appropriate for him to ask his HR contact or the person who hired him what protocol is and how to know which days a packed lunch is ok and which days it isn't. HR people should absolutely be able to help him navigate this issue successfully, and will likely appreciate the fact that he is savvy enough to know that there are etiquette norms, and humble enough realize he's still learning what they are in his new environment. The worst mistake a person can make at a new job is assuming and not clarifying.0
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I will toss my hat in the "just eat what they serve" ring.
1) Its free eats
2) If you are new you may want to do your best to blend in and not become the guy who is too good to eat with us.
I work in construction and I rarely if ever drink and I know that it has cost me jobs because I don't have the face time with the boss at the tavern like everyone else.
If he really does not want to eat the offerings then maybe do the ole, push it around the plate, cover with napkin and toss routine like you did when you were a kid with your broccoli.0 -
I understand the peer pressure here, but it really isnt on!!
I would "invent" a food allergy - say that you can't eat such and such as it makes you feel ill. Then take in your own stuff and eat along with your colleagues. I did this successfully for three months away on a legal course where every meal was corporate catering and my "allergy" prevented me from eating carbs and fats. After a few "oohs and ahhs" everyone forgot about it and saved me all the salads!.
good luck to him.!
And if his grown up colleagues found out that he would rather lie to them about allergies instead of manning up and just saying he'd rather bring his own lunch...
well, that would reflect wonderfully on his integrity.
Yeah I definitely don't think lying is the way to go...I 100% agree with the person who said this is really an etiquette issue. I'm sure pretty soon, he'll realize if it's cool for him to bring his own stuff to lunch or suggest that they order from somewhere with healthier options. Assuming this is more of a "career" than just a "job," it's important to foster relationships and professional friendships, which won't happen if people perceive him as rude.0 -
Office food is challenging. He might take a small portion of what they are catering or use his chili as a conversation starter. He could tell them what a great cook you are and how you like to make him lunches, or about the great new recipe he just cooked for his girlfriend last night
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My thought is that if they're having Popeye's; own lunch should be fine. If it's truly catered and formal with a client, make wise choices from what's being served. Also, it's entirely appropriate for him to ask his HR contact or the person who hired him what protocol is and how to know which days a packed lunch is ok and which days it isn't. HR people should absolutely be able to help him navigate this issue successfully, and will likely appreciate the fact that he is savvy enough to know that there are etiquette norms, and humble enough realize he's still learning what they are in his new environment. The worst mistake a person can make at a new job is assuming and not clarifying.
Yeah. What to eat for lunch is definitely an HR issue. "Today in new employee orientation we'll be discussing the 401K package as well as what days you need to eat chicken and what days you are allowed to eat what mommy packed for you."
Whatever we do let's not encourage people to learn for themselves how to function in the grownup world.0 -
Since I'm a vegetarian I always bring my own lunch from home to the conference room where everyone else is eating catered.0
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I really don't see the issue of pulling out his container of homemade chill and eating with them. He can still eat and socialize with them. You don't have to eat the same food to bond. Its kind of an ideal situation, they aren't going to restaurants every day where he wouldn't be able to bring his own lunch and have a hard time making better choices.
The issue is it's poor workplace etiquette. This is not just a bunch of coworkers eating lunch together. When CEO level people and especially when clients are involved it's just not the proper thing to do. The proper way to handle if you really don't want to eat any of the catered food is to eat your own before or after the group lunch and have a beverage and socialize with people during the meeting.
If it's a small company and you get the vibe that the CEO is friendly enough that it's considered a social lunch among co-workers even when he/she's present than after a while it's probably fine to bring your own food to those lunches, but if you value your career don't walk into a client lunch meeting with your own food.
My boyfriend works very closely with the CEO of the company he works for. They are both health nuts and he is always telling me about the lunches they bring while the other employees eat the "catered" lunch. What if they brought in big trays of pasta and you were a celiac and couldn't eat anything? Should you eat it anyways and possibly die later, just to kiss the CEO's bum?0 -
Many companies are developing Wellness Programs. I know mine has one but you can't tell it by the food that is catered for any employee gathering. To help me get through those peer pressure situations, I find out who the Wellness Committee member is and sit near them (we have one that comes up from HQ and she eats so healthy that nobody would notice if I ate nothing but air).
Nevertheless, sometimes I still fall into the trap. Last week, I brought my lunch (a good lunch I was looking forward to), and ate it slightly before our regular time. My boss then announces that we have "appreciation pizza" in the conference room. I got a big glass of water and was determined to just hang out and enjoy the networking time with my peers, but ended up having two pieces of hamburger pizza anyway. I felt good about the face time with the bosses but later felt crappy about overeating. There were no reps from the Wellness Committee in that room at all --- although our division committee member is the one who ordered the pizza lol.0 -
I really don't see the issue of pulling out his container of homemade chill and eating with them. He can still eat and socialize with them. You don't have to eat the same food to bond. Its kind of an ideal situation, they aren't going to restaurants every day where he wouldn't be able to bring his own lunch and have a hard time making better choices.
The issue is it's poor workplace etiquette. This is not just a bunch of coworkers eating lunch together. When CEO level people and especially when clients are involved it's just not the proper thing to do. The proper way to handle if you really don't want to eat any of the catered food is to eat your own before or after the group lunch and have a beverage and socialize with people during the meeting.
If it's a small company and you get the vibe that the CEO is friendly enough that it's considered a social lunch among co-workers even when he/she's present than after a while it's probably fine to bring your own food to those lunches, but if you value your career don't walk into a client lunch meeting with your own food.
My boyfriend works very closely with the CEO of the company he works for. They are both health nuts and he is always telling me about the lunches they bring while the other employees eat the "catered" lunch. What if they brought in big trays of pasta and you were a celiac and couldn't eat anything? Should you eat it anyways and possibly die later, just to kiss the CEO's bum?
If it's a real health issue, obviously not. And I don't even think you should eat something you don't want to if you know that you won't be offending anyone by eating something different. However, I think you need to take some time to assess whether this would be the case before just assuming that people don't care. It sounds like your husband knows the CEO of his company really well, which is very different than the situation here.0 -
So far there are four viable choices:
1. Become vegetarian
2. Become celiac
3. Get fat
4. Quit the rat race and get back his old job at the roller rink0 -
With coworkers, I think I'd kind of ease into it by bringing something from home plus having a serving of something communal. I could always say something like "I didn't want it to go to waste" if somebody said something about me pulling out my own {whatever}. If it seemed to offend, of course I'd just go with the flow; a good job can be hard to find.
For client lunches of course I'd go with the flow.0
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