Do I tell him?

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  • LiftAllThePizzas
    LiftAllThePizzas Posts: 17,857 Member
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    This sounds like something Larry David would use for a Seinfeld or Curb Your Enthusiasm episode.
  • monizjm
    monizjm Posts: 92 Member
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    Our anniversary is on HIS birthday. I get jipped. Haha. Actually we do things as a couple, like we're celebrating our anniversary, but he's just lucky he gets a BDay cake and gifts.
  • geekyjock76
    geekyjock76 Posts: 2,720 Member
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    Men don't set out to disappoint the women they love.
    I actually do. That way when I decide to do something nice, they view it as extra special.
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
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    It's best to remind him. So much easier to live life not expecting disappointment. Or getting disappointed.

    this. and while it is a special day, you do have another very special, very expensive day coming up. why don't you suggest just going out for dinner the two of you, and tell him you don't have to exchange gifts.
    I second this. And third and fourth and fifth it.

    Honestly I love having dinner and a few drinks with my fiance more than most gifts. Gifts are usually just "things". Time these days, is at a premium.
  • aprmay
    aprmay Posts: 216 Member
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    Say something. People don't always remember and this includes girls and guys. If you are expecting him to give you something or do something special, it's better to remind him ahead. That way, you are not miserable the day of. Happy Anniversary!
  • Granville_Cocteau
    Granville_Cocteau Posts: 209 Member
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    How can it be your anniversary if you are not married?

    technically an anniversary is the annual recurring date of any event. they started dating on may 5th 3 years ago so that is their third anniversary. my husband and i started dating on july 11th. he asked me to marry him on december 11th. we got married on may 7th. those are all anniversaries.

    Darn. I was unaware there would be math involved in these things.
  • servilia
    servilia Posts: 3,453 Member
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    Men don't set out to disappoint the women they love.
    I actually do. That way when I decide to do something nice, they view it as extra special.

    Setting the bar low... Smooth!
  • Jersey_Devil
    Jersey_Devil Posts: 4,142 Member
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    no u don't tell hiim. he's a big boy and show know this after 3 years.. if he "forgets", you go off on him like every other fiance/girlfriend/wife would.
  • ffhsanfran
    ffhsanfran Posts: 63 Member
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    You got the easiest days to remember. Cinco de mayo? And July 4th is the US Independence Day. Congratulations on both dates. Have a great wedding and marriage.
  • boonognog
    boonognog Posts: 55 Member
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    I am still planning on getting him an anniversary present and still slightly hope for the same, however I won't be mad if he forgets or thinks it doesn't mean much since we're about to have a new anniversary date...

    If you wouldn't be mad, you wouldn't have posted this here for other people to reinforce what you clearly want to hear.

    But here's my 2c anyway:

    Honest communication is important for any relationship. And gifts shouldn't matter in the long run, but if they matter for you, TELL HIM SO. Don't expect him to anticipate your wants where your personal emotional needs are concerned.
  • triciab79
    triciab79 Posts: 1,713 Member
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    Remind him and let him know you will always celebrate the day you and he first got together and you would like him to do the same. When you are married life gets busy and it is easy to forget each other. You need as many excuses to come back together as you can get. I celebrate the day I met my hubby, Sept 11th, every year.
  • dsjohndrow
    dsjohndrow Posts: 1,821 Member
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    My wife would be mad if she thought she would have to remind me. This is the age of Google effing calendar, get boy wonder a app for his iPhone.
  • DenyseMarieL
    DenyseMarieL Posts: 673 Member
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    Remind him. Get used to doing so. It's just better that way.


    Omg....this.

    A memory is what tells a man his anniversary was last week.
  • traceytwink
    traceytwink Posts: 538 Member
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    He may actually remember not all men forget, we remember our wedding anniversary every year by spending the day together we never get each other anything just spending time alone is enough to show how much you love each other, we are going to celebrate 14 yr this year we don't celebrate when we met anymore actually I can't even remember the date just the year sssshhhhhdont tell him lol, enjoy your wedding don't sweat the small stuff ????
  • rosebarnalice
    rosebarnalice Posts: 3,488 Member
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    Back in the dark ages before phone apps, I made it a point to have a paper calendar hanging up on the fridge where my (then) boyfriend and (now) husband would see it. On that calendar I would mark such things as my birthday, the anniversary of our first kiss, his mother's birthday, valentines day, etc. When it was getting close to a date I wanted him to remember, I would do a "honey, can you get me XXX from the fridge?" where we would be confronted by the big red circled date on the calendar.

    Now, 28 years into our wonderful marriage, HE is the one who, a few years ago, invited me to share a calendar phone app with him where I can post "common" dates of interest (along with reminders 2 or 3 days ahead of time.)

    Whenever he gets one of those reminders, he says that "Alice just sent me on a trip to the fridge!"
  • luckyshilling
    luckyshilling Posts: 229
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    In all honesty I am the date forgetter in my marriage. My husband is the one that remembers our anniversary and plans for it each year and I am the one left feeling like an asshat cuz I forgot our anniversary....again. But I do remember his Birthday every year and make a big deal out of it. :drinker:
  • M______
    M______ Posts: 288 Member
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    Such little faith in men. What have we ever done!

    *shakes head*
  • AngryDiet
    AngryDiet Posts: 1,349 Member
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    How do you know he's forgotten?

    Of course he's forgotten.

    I say don't remind him. Wait until it comes and goes. Spend a few days after thinking about how unbelievable it is that he forgot and working your anger up until you finally lose it at him completely.
  • bwnorton
    bwnorton Posts: 100 Member
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    Definitely remind him! We try to remember things, like birthdays and to change the oil in a car. But, sometimes stress makes us forgetful. Or hungry. It will also help you too. Men are simple. We say what we think. And if we're reminded of something, like an anniversary, that's OK. As long as it's done in a friendly, non-threatening manner, it's fine.
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
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    And when I say, or we say "remind him" it's because men just don't recall those dates quite like women do. It doesn't mean they don't care, it doesn't mean they don't adore you.

    Don't want it to seem like in saying that we are bashing...

    He probably still remembers what you wore on that date.

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