self defeating negativity

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  • EvanKeel
    EvanKeel Posts: 1,904 Member
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    buck up, Buttercup

    If you want to call me Buttercup, I think I deserve to see a lot more than your pecs.
  • CorvusCorax77
    CorvusCorax77 Posts: 2,536 Member
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    Word!!!!

    I don't jump to these negative conclusions... but I do sometimes get uncomfortable if I'm being watched in the gym.. probably cuz I wear tiny little booty shorts and I think "oooooh, maybe something is showing that shouldn't!" LOL
  • darrenkhalaf
    darrenkhalaf Posts: 10 Member
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    some motivation thought by me

    Believe you can and you’re halfway there.

    Every accomplishment starts with the decision to try.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
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    it's amazing....how the inner dialogue can affect things so completely.

    I was having this inner dialogue at the gym last week, while watching another woman work out in close to the same circuit I was doing. I mentioned to my boyfriend how in shape she was and how I couldn't wait to get there.

    he stopped, he looked at me...and he said "You realize you are lifting close to 30 pounds MORE than she is and you are about 2-3 sizes SMALLER than her...right?"

    I had to re-evaluate everything my inner voice tells me. It was humbling to realize how much I was listening to it...and how much it was causing me to perceive things differently than they were.

    great post Beach.

    I love your boyfriend!
  • Netwalks
    Netwalks Posts: 36 Member
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    Thank you x
  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
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    When someone is watching you when exercising, do you think that they are thinking how fat or out of shape you are? You don't know what they are thinking, they may be lost in thought or thinking "wow" that person is working hard.

    When others are laughing in the gym, do you think they're laughing at you? The world doesn't revolve around you. Other people have their own lives and their own thoughts.

    When someone comments on your groceries, do you think that they are mocking you? The person may simply be trying to engage in casual conversation and touched a nerve in you that they didn't realize existed.

    When someone offers you a cookie, do you think that they are trying to sabotage you? Sharing food is a great way of saying "I like/love you." Smile and say "no thank you" if you don't want it.

    When someone disagrees with you, do you think that they are bullying you? Sure bullies exist, but none of us is right all the time, and many people disagree on an infinite number of issues.

    Keep your inner dialogue positive. Focus on your goals. Realize different people have different goals and different ideas on how to reach them. Don't let your perceptions of other people's negativity destroy the positive changes that you are trying to make in your own life.

    Happy Monday!

    I'm a huge proponent of this. Well said, sir.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
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    The irony is that someone who has a problem with a self-defeating negative inner dialogue probably isn't going to be much affected (in any good way) by someone telling them to be positive. Such is the nature of these things.

    It sort of ends up being a 'preaching to the choir' exercise, which I assume must burn some amount of calories. So, carry on.

    When I first heard something like this, I was about 20 and really needed to hear this. If he has reached even one person, then this thread hasn't been a waste of space.

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