Hubby still finds me sexy, I don't get it...

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  • ajball90
    ajball90 Posts: 211 Member
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    I think personality also plays a lot on attractiveness. For example, I could find someone attractive, but If I then get to know them and they are really kind, funny, interesting - this would make them about 495767385 times more attractive than what I first thought. Just roll with it, you're lucky to have found someone who loves you, for you :)

    (Edited because I'm a really bad speller, haha).
  • Crochetluvr
    Crochetluvr Posts: 3,143 Member
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    Sexy is an attitude more so than being just physical. I met my b/f when I was 180 pounds... he was always telling me how sexy I was. When I hit 210, he was still telling me the same thing. You got it, girl! And you got yourself a terrific guy for seeing it.
  • onwarddownward
    onwarddownward Posts: 1,683 Member
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    Be happy. I have the opposite here.
  • craigmandu
    craigmandu Posts: 976 Member
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    That's awesome!

    Having been married 17 years myself, I can say that all my wife has to do is "snap her fingers" and I'm ready for whatever she wants. I know alot of times "she" is very self-concious...it's got to be a woman thing, cause there is nothing she could really do that would make me stop finding her attractive. I never see anything when I look at her but the greatest, sexiest, most nurturing thing I've ever met.

    And I know that will never change! Be good to him girl, cause he is absolutely good to you!
  • BajaDreamin333
    BajaDreamin333 Posts: 267 Member
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    He loves you and loves you no matter what. He's probably more attracted to the new light inside of you, something happens with each pound you shed. You're lucky :)
  • christianteach
    christianteach Posts: 593 Member
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    You are very fortunate to have a man like that! I have no idea when my husband last told me I was beautiful, hot or sexy...anything along those lines. I know it's been several years! Quite frankly, I don't think he's the least bit attracted to me anymore. I was very thin when we met and I guess he's just not into big girls. The ironic part is he's even bigger than I am.

    Hold on tight to your man!!
  • dragon1ady
    dragon1ady Posts: 335 Member
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    And don't keep saying bad things about yourself to him. Not only are you insulting the woman he loves, but eventually he may start seeing you the way you see yourself. Try to change the way you see yourself to how he sees you, not the other way around. Trust me on that.

    I haven't read the whole thread, so I don't know if this has been said already, but in addition to insulting the woman he loves, you're also in a sense insulting him. When he gives you compliments and tells you that you are sexy and attractive and you won't believe him, you are essentially accusing him of lying to you. (Or at the very least of being stupid and/or lacking in taste.)

    Allow yourself to consider the possibility that your husband is being honest and means what he says to you. :wink:

    If your guy didn't think you were superior to all other women out there he would be married to one of them instead of to you. The next time he gives you a compliment, give him one of those saucy smiles, strike a pose, and say, "Why, thank you. Please, go on..." :tongue:
  • happydaze71
    happydaze71 Posts: 339 Member
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    All this tells me, is that like most women, you hate how you look, so instead of feeling special and adored, you must convince him you're not that great.
    Take the compliments, take the adoration and the love. There are people in this world with none of the above who would die to have a man worship them like this.
    Now that I've told you off.... make his night tonight and make yourself understand that you are a beautiful sexy woman who deserves the best in life! :blushing:
  • Belaklevaleva
    Belaklevaleva Posts: 8 Member
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    There's actually and overweight girl that I have been chatting with daily. And I finder her incredibly attractive. At the end of the day, it's HER that makes the rest of her irresistible. :)
  • torymichaels
    torymichaels Posts: 79
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    My hubby and I met when I was 290 (10 years ago now). He said he found me beautiful, but didn't I want to be thin (translation: healthy)? As we, er, got it on so to speak when I was about that weight, clearly he found me attractive. I didn't get it then and still don't get it now.

    He was there as I lost 90 pounds and was thrilled for me (and I turned smokin' hot even at 199with 25 pounds to go).

    He's been there and never looked away as I gained it all back, though the pressure increased to get health, esp. after I got pregnant with our twins (now two).

    And he's right there by my side now as I shed the weight for the second (and final) time.

    I will never understand why he loves me, but I know he does and I know it's not just because I'm slender (though the fact that I'm really bendy even at this size probably doesn't hurt).
  • XX_Miss_RoseMary_XX
    XX_Miss_RoseMary_XX Posts: 274 Member
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    My Fiance still thinks I'm sexy and I have gained close to 100lbs since we met!

    Granted I am busting *kitten* to lose it, but he says it doenst matter to him, he loves me just the same!
  • 2stepscloser
    2stepscloser Posts: 2,900 Member
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    My husband does too, even though I am not at all pleased with what I look like. Since I met him in 1995, I've gained 100 lbs. and he's loved me every pound of it. When I ask him how he can find me sexy as well as someone who has a perfect body, he says its because there is more to me than my appearance. This weight loss journey is about me learning to love myself. When I do that, I know I can love others 10 times more.
  • fullofquirks
    fullofquirks Posts: 182 Member
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    I met my husband when I was 15 and 150lbs.

    When I was at my highest about 3 years ago I was 338.

    Currently 230lbs.

    He has been stuck to me like glue through it all.

    Enjoy it, it is a wonderful thing to have a person love you for you. For me sexy is very much in the mind. If a person is intelligent and witty it's a def. panty dropper; no matter gender/weight/ so on.

    Here's to love :flowerforyou:
  • Tara_238
    Tara_238 Posts: 70 Member
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    I have gained 70lbs since I met my husband almost 10 years ago. He still thinks I am sexy or he at leasts puts on a good act. Lol.
  • laddyboy
    laddyboy Posts: 1,565 Member
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    Sounds like he loves you for who you are and where you're at. He's a good man.
  • paulcer
    paulcer Posts: 167 Member
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    A very special man in my life once told me to let him be my mirror. I try to remember that. See yourself reflected in his eyes, it's a heady experience.
  • Athena53
    Athena53 Posts: 717 Member
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    The actress Raquel Welch once said that the greatest erogenous zone is the brain. As others have said, there's more to love and even sexual attraction than what you look like. Good thing, too- I'm 60 and have grey hair and wear glasses. My husband is 74, Neither of us would get a second look from the salespeople at A+F, but the physical side of our relationship is still wonderful.

    Be happy that your husband loves you even though you're not perfect.
  • 2stepscloser
    2stepscloser Posts: 2,900 Member
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    A very special man in my life once told me to let him be my mirror. I try to remember that. See yourself reflected in his eyes, it's a heady experience.

    That's great advice!

    This reminds me of the new Justin Timberlake song.
  • Sharon5913
    Sharon5913 Posts: 134 Member
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    I have the same issue with mine, and he sabotages me at every turn, I think he wants me to stay as I am.
  • Sharon5913
    Sharon5913 Posts: 134 Member
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    Wow, that's some powerful stuff!!

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