Worst Wedding You've Ever Attended
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Yes! I didn't know etiquette was a thing until I started planning either! And now I am just bound and determined to be a great host and to not be a rude bride. Open bar all night...no more than an hour between ceremony and supper, etc...and the ceremony and reception will be in the same place.
And reading about invitations and how much etiquette there is to that...and inviting plus ones and etc...omg! There was so much I didn't know!
I love reading about awful weddings though! It makes me plan to not do things at my own wedding. Keep 'em coming!
sounds perfect! I didn't follow much etiquette since my wedding wasn't fancy (outdoor beachside venue) but I wanted to make sure it was as convenient and fun for the guests as possible! I went to a wedding once where the ceremony was at a church almost an hour from the hall that the reception was held. I didn't get that. Just remember it's one day, and after a few weeks people will forget all about it, so don't stress (or spend $$) on the little stuff. That is the biggest thing I learned! haha
Ironically, this is exactly what etiquette is supposed to be for, not as a basis to judge people but to ensure your guests are treated well.0 -
Worse wedding I attended was long ago. It was my boyfriend at the time's best friend. My boyfriend was suppose to be the best man. But something came up and he couldn't even attend. My Boyfriend and his friend still wanted me to attend. The night before I also attended the bridal shower that was taking place in an apartment a couple doors down from the apartment where the groom's party was being held. There was suppose to be a stripper for the guys and a stripper for the girls. But the bride and her lady friend some how managed to cancel the guys stripper. And then arranged for one of the bride's old boyfriend to come as a second stripper for the ladies, as they wanted to have one last fling or even talk about calling off the wedding. Well needless to say a big fight broke out and most of the guest were so mad at the bride, her girlfriend, and old boyfriend that most of the people then refused to go to the wedding the next day. I really didn't want to go either after that, but my boyfriend still wanted me to go to take pictures for him, and to support the groom for going through with the wedding. The wedding was held out in the open on the apartment roof and hardly any one showed up. The people at the wedding were the brides three little girls from a previous relationship, the bride's sister and her kids, and a few of her friends. And a few of the groom's military buddies did show up too just to support him. And then there were a few of the apartment complex neighbors there too. And The reception was held in one apartment and spread all over the apartment complex. The dance and after party was held at a small dive night club type bar that the bride use to work at and only myself, the bride, her sister, the groom and I think 2-3 friends of the groom came. There was free beer, soda and some other stuff at the reception in the apartment. But everyone had to pay for their own at the night club. Needless to say that marriage didn't last long as the wife took off later. And her own three little girls that this man adopted after the wedding got left with him too as the mother didn't want to take care of them any more.0
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Well, I am not sure this qualifies as 'etiquette issue', but when the time came for the mother/son dance for the groom who was a long time family friend, slowly.....slowly......Pink Floyd's hit 'Mother' came on - I think everyone went into a state of surreal disbelief. Mother and Son seemed quite happy. If you don't know the song, look up the words.
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Generally, all the weddings I have been to have been fantastic - may have not been my particular taste, but that's why we are all unique.
My Dad's wedding was a kick in the stomach - a) he cheated on my Mum with the woman he was marrying and b) he referred to the divorce from my mother as a "difficult" time. Funny thing was, he was the one who stalled on the divorce and more than that, my Mum was left with nothing from the divorce - all the house money went to his debts. I got pretty smashed at that wedding and pretended that I didn't care.
The only other wedding that was a bit....less than good - my ex was a photographer and we were taking photos for an ex colleague of his. She was a lovely, humble, smart lady - she was marrying the love of her life and had recently experienced the bereavement of their young son, so it was quite a sombre affair. That wasn't the issue at all, the issue was the husband's less than polite side of the family (the husband was fine) who got completely mashed on Stella and cocaine outside and completely ruined the entire evening for the bride and groom when the police showed up with a van. I felt so sorry for them - it was so upsetting to watch and although I know they no longer speak to certain sections of that group. The fact that those people decided to not only use a wedding as a platform for aggression, but also the fact the wedding ceremony was centred around the deceased son...man that choked me up.0 -
my friend Cherise's wedding last September, 2012. the wedding went off without a hitch and it was time for the reception. the caters and everyone was waiting someone had to say there has been a delay you have to wait well by 6pm we ( my mom, stepdad, daughter and I ended up eating Mcdonald's) come to find out from the people who stayed there they didn't start the reception till 8pm mind you the wedding was at 2pm in the afternoon. the delay was the girls in the wedding party needed to redo their hair and make up because after the wedding was over it was raining.
so when her sister got married we got invited me, my mom, daughter and stepdad said we better leave early and grab a mcdonald's as this might be a repeat of what happened last time. and half the church folks who came last time all were eating at mcdonald's too. the reception there was not as bad we only had to wait 30 minuets.0 -
Let's see....
DH's Cousin's wedding.... Cousin 1.... DH and I were engaged and he was invited and we had to pay for me to go. WTF?
And Cousin #2... World's WORST wedding!
Wedding starts at 2:00, so we show up around 1:30-1:45ish and join the other guests in the sanctuary while the bridal party is having their pictures done. Yep, minutes before the wedding and we ALL see the bride. Um, Sweetheart, you should have had the pictures done already, it's bad luck to see the bride before the wedding!.... I thought the ceremony was awful. I had never been to a wedding where everyone sings hymns, but I've heard that it apparently isn't "weird" but I thought it was insane.... Proceed to the reception, there is NO FOOD! Why? The ditzy bride didn't finalize with the caterer. DUH! My MIL called the caterer and "magically" food appeared. There was NO CAKE!!!!! The bride asked several people to make key lime pies and cherry pies. Dafuq?!
My own wedding had a LOT of glitches due to manipulative IL's, but no breaches of ettiquette.0 -
Worst wedding?
Both of mine.
I am not a party girl.0 -
A lot of things at my wedding probably did not follow etiquette. BUT everyone had a great time. We had a "mini-destination" wedding. We got married about 3 hrs away and because of the time of day everyone came in early checked into cabins and stayed after the reception. The ceremony and cocktail hr was held on my husband's grandparents property right on the river and the reception was at a bar down the street that was closed to the public and was a cash bar. Everyone had a great time and still talks about it today.0
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My step-sister's wedding was awful. Well, the wedding itself was fine, it was the reception that was bad. I wasn't of legal drinking age at the time, so the fact that all of her other friends and family that were there just wanted to get totally wasted didn't help, but the worst part was that NO ONE would dance. (oh, and it wasn't an open bar either) I don't really remember the food, so it definitely wasn't great. I love dancing, and I was so sad that they only played crappy music, and I was the only one who would dance. I was so disappointed, and left pretty early.0
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Well, I am not sure this qualifies as 'etiquette issue', but when the time came for the mother/son dance for the groom who was a long time family friend, slowly.....slowly......Pink Floyd's hit 'Mother' came on - I think everyone went into a state of surreal disbelief. Mother and Son seemed quite happy. If you don't know the song, look up the words.
My father and daughter dance was Sweet Child o' Mine by guns and roses.
My mother in law wanted to dance to Harper Valley PTA. She joked about it for almost year and DH kept saying NO! lol0 -
Wow, 7 pages in negative 5 hours? Wedding mistakes-- you've tapped a gold mine. We attendees have never had a place to air our grievances it would seem. (My clock says it's 9:41am and your post happened around 2pm, strange time warp burrito).
Here's my list:
1) Backyard wedding in the middle of July: stressfull BEFORE and DURING as unsure what to wear due to grass, and also anticipating horrendous heat...which did occur, but subsided slightly as we rushed to get the shady table the minute we were informed inside the house was off limits by the homeowner. (not too cool either, you should have seen the faces of the elders, so disrespectful to my uncles I winced. minor offence, we carried on.)
2) potluck wedding: everyone was asked to bring something. also stressful before and during because really? you want us to bring you gifts AND somehow prepare, carry and display a food item for a number of guests we have not been informed of how many? then during because, we ate a mod podge of things we had no idea where they came from that did not of course all go together. also awkward because some people thought to bring wine JUST for THEIR own table while other's did not and so it just seemed odd for some tables to have 3 bottles of wine and others none whatsoever.
3) grabass wedding: one person got married quite young and as a result had a very young wedding party who were all drama on the limo's on the way to the church drinking and arguing over nail polish and etc., as well as taking advantage of the reception and being viewed as "adults" to grab each others *kitten* ad nauseum on the dance floor.
4) missing groom: one groom got diverted between the wedding and the reception to a local bar and was MIA for a couple of hours. when he finally was dragged in by some of his new beefy cousins-in-law he was getting mouthy with his new father in law and it was just shameful. he proceeded in the following years to isolate his bride and claim to love her more than even her own family. strange.
5) cheap dresses wedding: one wedding I was asked to be a bridesmaid in had dresses made by a seamstress. they were so cheaply made that when my fiance at the time lifted me over a low fence to participate in pictures it ripped along a side seam. luckily i knew how to pose to be in said pictures but I had to wear my wedding partner's tuxedo jacket the rest of the night. I would have preferred to pay more for a dress that would have lasted at least the one night.
6) double dinner: even though it was quite generous to be invited to a wedding that had two dinners; one at the church immediately following the wedding, and one at a local hotel that was more of a buffet tapas situation, it would have been nice to know this ahead of time because the first dinner was a taco truck and i'm a chile addict and found it hard to stop eating so many damned tacos. Only to be presented with brie and a number of other yummy things at the official reception. believe me i'm not complaining about the awesome food, just I would have liked to pace myself to enjoy all the yumness and a little heads up on the invite about dinner here and tapas later over there would have been great.0 -
Yes! I didn't know etiquette was a thing until I started planning either! And now I am just bound and determined to be a great host and to not be a rude bride. Open bar all night...no more than an hour between ceremony and supper, etc...and the ceremony and reception will be in the same place.
And reading about invitations and how much etiquette there is to that...and inviting plus ones and etc...omg! There was so much I didn't know!
I love reading about awful weddings though! It makes me plan to not do things at my own wedding. Keep 'em coming!
sounds perfect! I didn't follow much etiquette since my wedding wasn't fancy (outdoor beachside venue) but I wanted to make sure it was as convenient and fun for the guests as possible!I went to a wedding once where the ceremony was at a church almost an hour from the hall that the reception was held. I didn't get that. Just remember it's one day, and after a few weeks people will forget all about it, so don't stress (or spend $$) on the little stuff. That is the biggest thing I learned! haha
Ironically, this is exactly what etiquette is supposed to be for, not as a basis to judge people but to ensure your guests are treated well.
i agree the point is to treat guests well. however I just wanted to add that the weddings I mentioned some took place decades ago, and I still remember. [yeah, my nickname should be "the grudge"]0 -
I thought the ceremony was awful. I had never been to a wedding where everyone sings hymns, but I've heard that it apparently isn't "weird" but I thought it was insane....
<snip>There was NO CAKE!!!!! The bride asked several people to make key lime pies and cherry pies. Dafuq?!
My own wedding had a LOT of glitches due to manipulative IL's, but no breaches of ettiquette.
Neither of the above is a breach of etiquette (although you may not have been implying that they were); they're matters of taste and tradition. DH and I had a full church wedding and there were hymns; if you didn't know them and/or didn't want to sing, no one forced you to. (We had 4 soloists on the altar and an organist so it wasn't like we went cheap on music. We LOVE music) We didnt' have a cake, either. DH makes sublime chocolate chip cookies and shortbread cookies and we had piles of them. No one missed the cake. Two lovely women I know celebrated their union with banana pudding instead of a cake because they had a friend who made great banana pudding.
It's actually those differences that say something about the couple and make each wedding special.0 -
Yes! I didn't know etiquette was a thing until I started planning either! And now I am just bound and determined to be a great host and to not be a rude bride. Open bar all night...no more than an hour between ceremony and supper, etc...and the ceremony and reception will be in the same place.
And reading about invitations and how much etiquette there is to that...and inviting plus ones and etc...omg! There was so much I didn't know!
I love reading about awful weddings though! It makes me plan to not do things at my own wedding. Keep 'em coming!
sounds perfect! I didn't follow much etiquette since my wedding wasn't fancy (outdoor beachside venue) but I wanted to make sure it was as convenient and fun for the guests as possible!I went to a wedding once where the ceremony was at a church almost an hour from the hall that the reception was held. I didn't get that. Just remember it's one day, and after a few weeks people will forget all about it, so don't stress (or spend $$) on the little stuff. That is the biggest thing I learned! haha
Ironically, this is exactly what etiquette is supposed to be for, not as a basis to judge people but to ensure your guests are treated well.
i agree the point is to treat guests well. however I just wanted to add that the weddings I mentioned some took place decades ago, and I still remember. [yeah, my nickname should be "the grudge"]
Yeah, I meant most people don't sit there and pick apart a wedding to find etiquette breaches. But it is also there so people don't remember your wedding decades later for the wrong reasons either.
People aren't going to remember for decades how the invites were written, but being hot and uncomfortable is going to stick with you whether you care about etiquette or not. I am pretty sure the groom thing isn't even an etiquette issue, that just WTF.0 -
OT the worse wedding i went to was the one where the bride of 6 hours was slamming the door to the gent's room ,
shouting to her dear hub she was going to devorse him :noway:
( And in Holland i never ever heart of a cash bar !)0 -
My Own lolz0
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Attended a wedding several years ago. The poor couple! The venue's toilets backed up, the A/C went down, and it got so hot in the reception hall, the layers of their cake slid off each other and landed on the floor!0
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Yes! I didn't know etiquette was a thing until I started planning either! And now I am just bound and determined to be a great host and to not be a rude bride. Open bar all night...no more than an hour between ceremony and supper, etc...and the ceremony and reception will be in the same place.
And reading about invitations and how much etiquette there is to that...and inviting plus ones and etc...omg! There was so much I didn't know!
I love reading about awful weddings though! It makes me plan to not do things at my own wedding. Keep 'em coming!
sounds perfect! I didn't follow much etiquette since my wedding wasn't fancy (outdoor beachside venue) but I wanted to make sure it was as convenient and fun for the guests as possible!I went to a wedding once where the ceremony was at a church almost an hour from the hall that the reception was held. I didn't get that. Just remember it's one day, and after a few weeks people will forget all about it, so don't stress (or spend $$) on the little stuff. That is the biggest thing I learned! haha
Ironically, this is exactly what etiquette is supposed to be for, not as a basis to judge people but to ensure your guests are treated well.
i agree the point is to treat guests well. however I just wanted to add that the weddings I mentioned some took place decades ago, and I still remember. [yeah, my nickname should be "the grudge"]
Yeah, I meant most people don't sit there and pick apart a wedding to find etiquette breaches. But it is also there so people don't remember your wedding decades later for the wrong reasons either.
People aren't going to remember for decades how the invites were written, but being hot and uncomfortable is going to stick with you whether you care about etiquette or not. I am pretty sure the groom thing isn't even an etiquette issue, that just WTF.
I'm pretty sure too, but I included it because you never know. Maybe wherever he was raised he was not taught the same values we have that when you are the host or the person the party is in honor of, it is your responsibility to be there throughout and there is a greeting line you need to be a part of as well as bidding your guests goodbye at the end. Both of which he missed. The groom missed his own receiving line and goodbyes and the usual "thank you's" most people do at the end of parties.0 -
I'm pretty sure too, but I included it because you never know. Maybe wherever he was raised he was not taught the same values we have that when you are the host or the person the party is in honor of, it is your responsibility to be there throughout and there is a greeting line you need to be a part of as well as bidding your guests goodbye at the end. Both of which he missed. The groom missed his own receiving line and goodbyes and the usual "thank you's" most people do at the end of parties.
Yes, good point, I just got stuck on the fact he left his wife on their wedding day for a few hours and didn't consider the rest any further.0 -
Just make sure that attendees can tell the event is about a marriage and NOT just about a wedding!! Worst wedding ever felt like I was at a royal coronation and the best wedding ever felt like I was at an intimate party in which the hosts were celebrating how much they loved eachother.0
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Wait, were we at the same wedding? That sounds so much like a wedding I went to years ago. Some people were invited to the ceremony only and others were invited to both ceremony and reception. But I didn't know this and when I commented to a mutual friend that I hadn't seen her at the reception, she told me she wasn't invited. Ugh.
The ceremony itself irritated me too because the priest gave this long sermon to the bride about how she should "obey and cleave to her husband."
My husband and I had a great wedding that our family and friends that attended still talk about almost 19 years later. We did an old west theme and all the participants wore costumes. It was great because the bridesmaids could pick whatever they wanted and rent it, thereby controlling the cost a little bit. We brought in a gambling casino and it was a ton of fun. We had to chase people out when the reception was over.0 -
Worst part I find in weddings.. standing around waiting for the endless number of photographs to be taken. It's the worst for those who are not in the photographs, or only in very few as not part of the bridal party.
This is another pet peeve of mine. Our photographers strongly recommended doing a sneak peek and then doing all the photos before the wedding, especially since ours was starting in the evening and we would have lost the light. It worked out phenomenally well. Both of us started crying when we walked to each other and I am so glad that we didn't do that part in front of 150 people. It made me much less nervous for the ceremony and less emotional. Then we were able to go straight from the ceremony inside to the reception venue and start the party!0 -
As to the announcement that no male guests were to hug the bride, as the groom wouldn't approve....WTH? If I was that bride, I would have said, loudly, "You marrying me does not mean you own me. I will hug whomever I want to, and if you don't like it, this wedding is over, I'm not marrying you." Controlling *kitten*. Give him three weeks and he'll be backhanding her becasue the toast was too dark or the sheets weren't ironed..0
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I'd be thinking like you..but some women eat that stuff up....the bride most likely knew just what she was getting into, and liked it :ohwell:As to the announcement that no male guests were to hug the bride, as the groom wouldn't approve....WTH? If I was that bride, I would have said, loudly, "You marrying me does not mean you own me. I will hug whomever I want to, and if you don't like it, this wedding is over, I'm not marrying you." Controlling *kitten*. Give him three weeks and he'll be backhanding her becasue the toast was too dark or the sheets weren't ironed..0 -
I've talked to most of my guests, and they agree. Don't rush. Enjoy your day. We are having it in a large city, so people can go for lunch if they so choose. Also, a lot will have children under the age of 5 so taking them home for a nap is a lot better then making the children power through a wedding from 2 until 10. The elder will have a chance to go a rest too. I have always preferred weddings where there is a long gap between ceremony and reception. I usually wear something more casual to the church and something more formal to the reception. Gives me time to go home, feed the dog, walk the dog, play with the dog, change, have a snack (weddings are never on time so you probably won't eat until later than you thought). Giving the guests 4 or 5 hours gives them more options of things to do rather, than 1 maybe 2 hours where they really can't do anything because there isn't enough time, and then they rush back to the reception only to find out that the bride and groom are running an hour behind because they didn't give themselves enough time for all the pictures they wanted to do.It's your wedding and do what you want and forget what others think. My wedding ceremony will be at 11 am and the reception is at 4:30. I don't care what everyone else will do. I know I will be busy with pictures. I would like to enjoy my day and not feel rushed to get every picture I want in.
And....what are your guests supposed to do that entire time? Don't be surprised if you get a lot of them who leave...or keep their gift to you. A better way to do it is to do a "first look" photo shoot before the ceremony and take most of your pictures before then so you don't have that rude gap. You should never keep your guests waiting for more than an hour with nothing to do.
My fiancé and I have been told numerous times, that the day goes by so fast, that you don't remember it. We want as many pictures as possible to remember everything, even if they are posed shots. If we arrive early at the reception, great, I just don't want to be thinking, I wish we could have gotten pictures there but didn't because we didn't have time.
I am not a bridezilla. Everything else about the wedding is to make the party the best ever. We aren't getting decorations like most weddings have because we would rather spend our money on booze, food and DJ. This is the one thing we want, so this is the one thing we are doing for ourselves.0 -
I was a brides maid at my friend's wedding along with several other really good friends. The groomsmen completely ignored us like we had the plague and everyone else at the wedding acted like we didn't exist, including the maid of honor who gave us the stink eye every time we tried to start a conversation with her. It was super awkward and unorganized, and we all just sat there looking at our food.0
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I've talked to most of my guests, and they agree. Don't rush. Enjoy your day. We are having it in a large city, so people can go for lunch if they so choose.
I think it makes a big difference when you're in a city with a lot of different options, and when there's a big enough gap that people actually can go back to the hotel, check out a museum, etc. and you've given them advance notice so they can plan accordingly. One thing you might want to do if you have a lot of out-of-town guests unfamiliar with the area is provide a list of interesting things they might want to do before the reception. Some of them may end up in groups doing something together. For many people, it's a chance to be with friends and family they don't see very often.0 -
ok so i have to chime in again , have had 3 weddings, personally, none of which were the "classic" wedding
1st one i was 18 he was 36- dont ask, as girlfriend and i were getting ready - we were joking about how long till the divorce, it was at his mormon church , we got baptized first and then the ceremony, which was done in one of the childrens learning rooms because wasnt an annointed member couldnt get married in the church area properly.. huh???
2nd one- i was 6 months pregnant it was on 1-1-2000 yep new years DAY... my dad called me that morning to tell me had decided not to come,because it would make my step mother mad... WHAT???
3rd one, our reservations for the schmantzy room at a fancy restaurant had gotten cancelled without notice, which i found out 3 hours before we were ready to leave for the ceremony,,, so
Valentines Day evening- no place to fit into in a pinch , we ended up at the back room of a kind of Divy mexican restaurant, holding hands and seated at the table with our officiant, and said the words over refried beans and chips... oh , and thats been going on for 11 years now
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My brothers both got married and at both of them people were taking bets as to how long they lasted. No one was happy about them. That was pretty horrible.
One of their friends is an attorney and he promised my brother free divorce services.0 -
I think it's important to remember the purpose of a wedding - to celebrate to people marrying. The purpose is not to entertain you.
At the worst wedding I ever attending, the groom was so hungover he threw up at the altar.0
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