Father is not happy about my 5K.

24

Replies

  • Annerk1
    Annerk1 Posts: 372 Member
    Oh for crying out loud. It's 3.1 miles, not an ultra-marathon. You can leisurely walk it in well under an hour.

    Don't even mention it again until after the race, and then proudly tell him how well you did.
  • healthyKYgirl
    healthyKYgirl Posts: 272 Member
    Anyone else ever run into family issue with your fitness?

    I have the opposite problem. My children think I'm too old to do this. I can walk 3 miles without feeling too bent out of shape and they need to mind their own business. If I can do it then so can you.

    Sir, you are never too old. And I say that, because I was out run by the 87 year old guy with a walker at a 10 mile race. He blew past me like I was standing still. He blew past lots of people like that. So, tell your kids to stuff it. You either use it or lose it, and apparently you still have it, so you do your own thing! :)

    And to the OP, if you feel ready then you are! 5K's are a lot of fun! :) Good luck in your race, and ask your dad to your next one with you.
  • MsPudding
    MsPudding Posts: 562 Member
    I'm 250lbs and can walk 10 miles (16k) in one go with no problem whatsoever. I do 5k on a daily basis just dog walking - it's barely a stroll.

    As for running. I'd also give a thumbs up for the Couch to 5k. Whilst I could walk all day long, I couldn't run too far but I've found that C25K really builds up the stamina.

    I'd just nod and smile at your Dad if I were you.
  • mojohowitz
    mojohowitz Posts: 900 Member
    Sometimes families suck at giving encouragement. I stopped telling my family personal stuff about the age of 27. In their effort to be protective they were very VERY discouraging.

    Just don't tell them.
  • Annerk1
    Annerk1 Posts: 372 Member
    Anyone else ever run into family issue with your fitness?

    I have the opposite problem. My children think I'm too old to do this. I can walk 3 miles without feeling too bent out of shape and they need to mind their own business. If I can do it then so can you.

    Sir, you are never too old. And I say that, because I was out run by the 87 year old guy with a walker at a 10 mile race. He blew past me like I was standing still. He blew past lots of people like that. So, tell your kids to stuff it. You either use it or lose it, and apparently you still have it, so you do your own thing! :)

    And to the OP, if you feel ready then you are! 5K's are a lot of fun! :) Good luck in your race, and ask your dad to your next one with you.

    I've never seen a race that allows a walker. Most specifically refuse walkers and canes. Some fun walks allow them, but races? Not that I've ever seen.
  • ITSSODAMNHOT
    ITSSODAMNHOT Posts: 121 Member
    You should tell your father whatI told mine..... Oh wait, wasn't there hehehe.

    I would usually tell my mother something I did after I've done it... Run a marathon, sky dive, Run to vegas and get married, have three kids...

    That way she cannot talk me out of anything.
  • asp415
    asp415 Posts: 1,492 Member
    that she is. I am getting there though, so soon we can do it together.
  • xaMErica
    xaMErica Posts: 284 Member
    I think it sounds like him being protective.. <3

    My Mom doesn't want me to sign up for ANY race because of what happened in Boston =/
  • ShellyBell999
    ShellyBell999 Posts: 1,482 Member
    Ask him to walk it with you.

    ^^^ This
    Great way to spend quality time and it's over before you know it.
  • RunForChai
    RunForChai Posts: 238 Member
    Years ago when I first began to run tons of people warned me about all the bad things that were going to happen: arthritis [the connection between running and arthritis shows running HELPs the joints], getting too thin, overdoing it....blah, blah, blah. I've run 30 marathons and many shorter races and they have only brought me joy.

    It's interesting these same people usually don't warn you off TV, or overeating or many other real dangers.

    Run---take your power [and a good pair of shoes] and run---who knows one day dad may run with you.

    I do advise that when you practice you run on a soft surface such as grass, dirt or even asphalt but never cement. Also, if you are really heavy for your frame do some of your running in a pool to take the weight off.

    Go girl!
  • GiddyNZ
    GiddyNZ Posts: 136 Member
    His reaction is completely off.. get out there and show him how its done!!
  • freyaheart
    freyaheart Posts: 220 Member
    Ask him to walk it with you.

    Sadly enough. He can barely walk at all. He has polio, type 2 diabetic, obese, lost a toe and is prone to falling. What I really want to do is try to inspire him to take his health seriously. I am scared that I was going to end up like him (I'd never tell him that) I can only hope that once he sees me doing all these races and such that maybe he will take action for himself. I know there is no guarantee in that but I can hope at least.

    I am going to do my 5K it is already paid for, I've been wanting to do it for months and I can do this!!

    He will see just what I can do when I come home and show him my race number and my brand new tshirt!
  • MySlimGoals
    MySlimGoals Posts: 754 Member
    My dad is like that too, tells me NOT to run because I'll hurt myself. I did my first 5k a month ago, and sent him the photo by email - lol - he was so furious he sent me back a blank email in reply. Then a couple of weeks ago I did another one and sent him the photo and my new improved faster time. Then I saw him for my graduation last week and he went on and on about the usual how he thinks I'll hurt myself by getting an injury if I continue running and not be able to walk and then I won't get a job when I've spent the last year being successful at university etc etc. I could go on - been putting up with his negativity all my 33 years. There's a lot I haven't done in my life because I've listened to him too much and believed him. He did a 21km half marathon when he was younger - I'm not sure why he thinks he can be so negative now - he's in his 80's now and the real reason he stopped running was because he got old. I told him before he got on the plane to go home that I was going to do a 10km run next month. He looked so happy (NOT). lol. Ignore your negative father is my advice and do what you feel is best for you. You have youth on your side, and you only live once.
  • jennifershoo
    jennifershoo Posts: 3,198 Member
    Is your father overweight and/or out of shape? Maybe he's jealous! Or he's just being a concerned parent.
  • jennifershoo
    jennifershoo Posts: 3,198 Member
    i told my dad about how i started going to the gym and lifting weights. then we had a nice long talk about how i shouldn't do steroids. sigh.

    Lol!
  • KyleB65
    KyleB65 Posts: 1,196 Member
    Shame on your father!
    I am a father of two adults - 22 & 21 yrs.
    Since I started losing weight and eating better both my children have also lost weight. My daughter has joined a gym and dropped 2 dress sizes. And, my Son has gone from a 38 waist to a 34 waist.
    I do not know your family or you! But, kudos to you for signing up to run a 5k. My first scared the crap out of me. But, I finished. Then I signed up and trained for a 10k. Again, scared the crap out of me but I finished. Since then I have completed a half marathon and I just last week signed up for a full marathon this coming Sept.
    You rock young lady!!! Go get it done and show your father what you can accomplish!
  • nwg74
    nwg74 Posts: 360 Member
    You will be fine. I was walking 3 miles everyday when I was 370 pounds. I did 30 miles in one week once. Now I settle for 4 miles most days when walking the dog.

    Running however is not something I can do for long periods even at 170 pounds. I am working on that.
  • JUDDDing
    JUDDDing Posts: 1,367 Member
    Oh for crying out loud. It's 3.1 miles, not an ultra-marathon. You can leisurely walk it in well under an hour.

    Don't even mention it again until after the race, and then proudly tell him how well you did.

    This.

    Maybe he doesn't know what a "k" is. 3 miles is a long shopping trip not a death march.
  • healthyKYgirl
    healthyKYgirl Posts: 272 Member
    Well, I was shocked, but I've seen lots of things at races that weren't technically allowed, and this guy was doing better than most people, so if an official saw him, I don't think they cared.
  • jgollnick
    jgollnick Posts: 73 Member
    Called my dad to tell him I am going to do a 5K and he got mad insisting I am going to cramp up, faint or (insert other horrible thing here).

    I am 25 years old I have been working out pretty regularly since January and I've lost 12 pounds. I am currently 227 pounds and I know that most of the people there will probably be in a lot better shape then me but I think I am ready! I signed up to walk it, I'm not much or a runner yet.

    Anyone else ever run into family issue with your fitness?

    Le me tell you something. Don't you dare let your father discourage you. I started MFP in 11/2012. I worked hard and run 5x a week and right now I am about 215 and I run 2 miles on the treadmill at 6.5 mph and feel good when I'm done. YOU CAN DO IT!

    31512657.png
    Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter
  • freyaheart
    freyaheart Posts: 220 Member
    Oh for crying out loud. It's 3.1 miles, not an ultra-marathon. You can leisurely walk it in well under an hour.

    Don't even mention it again until after the race, and then proudly tell him how well you did.

    This.

    Maybe he doesn't know what a "k" is. 3 miles is a long shopping trip not a death march.

    I love you two right now ;P
  • info_nrs
    info_nrs Posts: 102 Member
    Anyone else ever run into family issue with your fitness?

    I have the opposite problem. My children think I'm too old to do this. I can walk 3 miles without feeling too bent out of shape and they need to mind their own business. If I can do it then so can you.

    Sir, you are never too old. And I say that, because I was out run by the 87 year old guy with a walker at a 10 mile race. He blew past me like I was standing still. He blew past lots of people like that. So, tell your kids to stuff it. You either use it or lose it, and apparently you still have it, so you do your own thing! :)

    And to the OP, if you feel ready then you are! 5K's are a lot of fun! :) Good luck in your race, and ask your dad to your next one with you.

    I've never seen a race that allows a walker. Most specifically refuse walkers and canes. Some fun walks allow them, but races? Not that I've ever seen.

    Just did the Cleveland Marathon, and was alongside a lady with a walker in the 10K walking division, I cramped up and slowed down, she blew right past me and many others. I highly doubt that you can 'exclude' anyone if they can keep the pace and sign the waiver.
  • OhSweetEnigma
    OhSweetEnigma Posts: 5
    You should be proud of yourself! You can absolutely do it. Your father sounds like mine... but he might just be concerned.

    I've been going to spin 1-3 times per week for the past few months, and have been feeling great about toning up.

    My dad says to me one morning (without my asking): "Wow, you're definitely looking thinner in your legs, but you still need to work on your midsection and rear end."

    Or for the one or two times per week I decide to treat myself to a SMALL treat, he will say "So you're giving up on your healthy eating?"

    I know he doesn't mean anything by it, just like your father probably doesn't. You should tell your dad how you'd like him to support you... tell him that you are being cautious and training and need him to encourage you.

    Good luck!!
  • Ascolti_la_musica
    Ascolti_la_musica Posts: 676 Member
    I was bigger than that when I did my first 5k, and it was a zombie obstacle course. LOVED IT!!!
    I injured myself and had to stop halfway through my second 5k last weekend, but I have every intention of signing up for it again next year.
    Next month, I will be doing my first 5k without obstacles, and I still weigh more than you.

    You can do a 5k with or without obstacles- the biggest one is showing up. Don't let ANYONE stop you!

    (But yeah, I got a few negative comments from friends and family, too.)
  • squirrelzzrule22
    squirrelzzrule22 Posts: 640 Member
    I didn't tell my family I was running a half marathon until I sent them my finish line photo. It was for the exact same reasons- I wanted to avoid the comments and judgements. He loves you and cares for you, but maybe it's for the best to tell your family about your goals after you achieve them. It's the only way I can manage!! Good luck and kick butt at the race!!!
  • Chieflrg
    Chieflrg Posts: 9,097 Member
    Doesn't sound like he is too open. Perhaps you can ask him to be at the finishline. Just maybe....

    One thing is certain, I applaud you for the mind set of doing it regardless how you have to. Enjoy yourself!
  • clarkeje1
    clarkeje1 Posts: 1,641 Member
    Sucks when people close to you aren't supportive (one of my best friends told me I was getting obsessed and I'm going to get an eating disorder which is SO not the case) but you just have to think that even though they might be hating you just gotta do what you need to achieve your goals and make yourself proud. Doesn't matter if they are jealous or doubtful of you, as long as you love yourself :) It's your body!!!
  • BrawlerBella
    BrawlerBella Posts: 400 Member
    I've done a few 5ks you'll rock it! Just go out there, enjoy yourself, prove him wrong and kick some serious A$$phalt. #Happyrunning #Womenrunning
  • Elzecat
    Elzecat Posts: 2,916 Member
    Is your father an experienced runner?

    Is he paying your entrance fee and providing your childcare, transportation and meals for the day of the 5K?

    Is he a medical doctor with knowledge of a prior medical condition that could prove harmful to you?

    No?

    Then nod your head, tell him that you appreciate his concern, and go run/walk your 5K.

    I have a more dysfunctional family of origin than many, so I will say that I don't always understand the "close family ties" that bind many loving family members together. In this situation, he's not really being much of a "loving family member," so I would advocate that you separate yourself from his toxic attitude (not try to change it, but just separate yourself emotionally from caring what he thinks). What he thinks about your walking/running has no impact whatsoever on your actual walking/running. You don't need to change his opinion, and I'd advise you to not expect or rely upon his support and encouragement in your future fitness endeavors.
  • Elzecat
    Elzecat Posts: 2,916 Member
    Anyone else ever run into family issue with your fitness?

    I have the opposite problem. My children think I'm too old to do this. I can walk 3 miles without feeling too bent out of shape and they need to mind their own business. If I can do it then so can you.

    Good for you! There's a lady in my running group who race walks instead of running. I don't know your age, but she's 72 (although you'd never know to look at her!) and she racewalks half marathons and other events. One of the last half marathons I did....she was so fast (and I was pretty slow!) that she racewalked right past me to the finish! Invite your kids to come walk with you!

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