I don't know how to stop binging
Replies
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Bottom Line - You have to want it bad enough, no one else can do that for you.
We've all been there, we've all had that "lightbulb" moment0 -
wow. you come here looking for help. a few people suggest OA meetings, telling you to make time (because it's worth it and can actually help you) and you come off all snooty and on the defensive saying how you work 55 hours a week and don't need to be preached to and don't believe in god.
you know, don't ask me tips on how to play soccer, but neglect to tell me you only have one leg.
fine, you don't want to be preached to. i get that.... wait, no i don't. you need to be 'preached to' to overcome your problem. in AA they have a 90 meetings in 90 days rules for newbies, in the hopes that it sinks in. you obviously can't make it due to your job (which we were somehow supposed to just know???). but this is just like the people who bash crossfit without ever having tried a class.
make it to a meeting once. just go. do it. in fact, go to two meetings so you can really really get a good evaluation of the thing. the closest one is 15 miles?? HOLY EFFING SQUIRRL BALLS is that really far away for you?? or are you just making another excuse not to get yourself better? just like the free snacks in the kitchen, and the whole "i sit down for work 8 hour days."
How is saying that I work a lot of hours coming off as snooty? Someone made a suggestion and I shared how it wouldn't work for me and I said "unfortunately I work 55 hours a week." Are you offended that I have an amazing job and am a workaholic? Or are you mistaking my getting pissed at people basically telling me that I'm lazy and being flat out rude when I asked for help?
I will probably never post in the forums again because of this post, the first topic I've created, getting so many *****y responses. I came here because I was under the impression that this was going to be a helpful, safe place, but clearly I was very wrong and I won't make this mistake again.
No one is being mean or cruel to you. You are reading that into messages. You are reading when someone tells you to take control, that they are telling you that you are lazy. You read "rudeness" into messages that are simply not rude...
You have gotten alot of great responses...however you seem to focus on the negative. This puts the impression in my mind that you are "hunting" for reasons to declare to yourself that you won't be able to "handle" this, and thus give yourself the green light to keep on like you have been.
I wish you luck, and hope you actually do what it takes to get it under control.0 -
It's becoming an every day thing and I'm sabotaging myself and it's really getting upsetting.
Two months ago, I lost 12 lbs in about a month and it was great. I was really happy with myself and proud. And then I started a new job. Not only did I go from 8 hours a day on my feet in retail to a desk job, but I went from a store without even a microwave to a haven for my fat brain. I sit at my desk for 8 hours a day, only getting up to pee and eat. And the kitchen is filled with free snacks.
There's a movie popcorn machine, two flavors of Faygo slushies, garlic (my favorite) Chex Mix with Cheez its (my favorite of the cheese crackers), M&M trail mix, and Cinnamon Toast Crunch.
Every day, I eat at least two Styrofoam cups-worth of one or more of the snacks and have at least two slushies. The Chex Mix alone has 130 calories in half a cup and I'll easily go through two or three cups a day. One day the air was broken and I had 6 slushies. I eat lunch and then I go and get popcorn. Then I go back to my desk and 20 minutes later I go get Chex Mix and a slushie. Then I come home to chips and guac, Cheez Its, or some other snack food that my mother has bought. This weekend I ate an entire costco sized tub of italian pasta salad. AND an entire box of Cheez Its.
I have no idea how to stop this. I can't avoid it because I have to walk past it all to put my lunch in the refrigerator and to get to the bathroom. I don't even track it, which ruins my entire day and I almost never track past lunch because I get upset with myself and give up. Every single day. In the past two months I've put on all of the weight that I lost before and it's honestly so depressing that I've seriously considered weight loss surgery that is against my personal morals.
How do I stop this so I can lose weight and get past this point in my life? I'm really not looking for someone to tell me to just stop eating it because I already have someone who doesn't understand what I'm going through and I don't need more.
This will probably get lost in the sea of comments, but you should be aware that high carb food (such as Chex mix and slushies) have a tendency to make you hungrier. Look into Leptin Resistance. http://www.reddit.com/r/keto/comments/16or0n/science_my_doctor_likes_keto_and_paleo_his/0 -
The first important thing is you realize what is happening and, you want to beat it. My mother always said she was allergic to food, she broke out in fat. Also, you are a food addict as I am. What I would like to suggest is tonight you write the list of foods, including snacks, that you will have for tomorrow. Everything on your list is to be brought to work. When you feel the urge to binge, either get up and walk around the office once or twice or, chew a piece of gum or, go outside for some fresh air. I will not offend by asking you however; I am a Christian and, when the going gets tough, I take it to the Lord and tell Him what is going on and sure enough, I feel better. Also, drink plenty of water, some room temperature and some cold out of the fridge. We are all here for you and, we have all gone through and, some of us are still going through difficult times, really rough patches. Just don't give up, when you make a mistake, gather yourself together, pick yourself up and begin again...that is the key to success.0
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If the point of eating is for Gratification, then look at it this way- The pain of saying "no" to food now is NOTHING like the pain of Being fat. The gratification of being a healthy you, and loving what you see in the mirror is much better than the gratification of that snack. So pain now or pain later? Gratification now or gratification later? You decide.
Log your food and keep your diary open, accountability will help.
I disagree with the idea of eating replacement snacks - all it does is change what kind of items you are binging on, you need to do something to gain control of the behavior, not find a way around it.
I fall closer to zen/ taoism than any other religion - but If someone uses the word god in the midst of good advice I will take the advice. I can replace the word "god" with "universe" and it will mean more to me. They don't need to know I am replacing words with ones that help me. Release your attachment to the word "God" and replace it with something that works for you. The advice and help will be the same.
Remember that you cant get upset that complete strangers are not going to feel sympathy for someone who asks advice and then rejects the advice given. You have to FIND A WAY to make the changes. All you talk about are your obstacles- not once have you talked about a reason or a way above it.0 -
Unfortunately I work 55 hours a week, so it's not possible to attend any sort of meeting.
make time
This. Stop making excuses. "If it's important you'll find a way, if it's not you'll find an excuse."
I work 55 or more hours a week and still make time for the gym every day, have meetings of some sort at least 2-3 times a week and watch my favorite TV shows. In addition I am active on the weekends. It can be done, but you have to want it bad enough to make good decisions. It's a decision to walk to the kitchen, it's another decision to fill a cup with junk, and it's another to eat it. You need to be cognizant of your actions and be accountable for them.0 -
I have free snacks at my work too (chips, candy bars, cookies, sometimes cupcakes, pizza). If I bring a lot of good food I am less tempted to eat those snacks as opposed to if I don't bring much for lunch, I'll end up hungry and resort to eating the snacks. Stock the employee fridge with healthy snacks and don't let yourself get hungry... eat throughout the day to keep yourself satisfied but not full. If you know you aren't hungry and just have the urge to eat try chewing minty gum and drinking water. Hope this helps!0
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Some people who are giving you a hard time and saying things like "put down the fork" clearly don't understand what it's like to deal with emotional eating/binge eating. I know it can feel like you are helpless and out of control and can't stop. But you do have to stop making excuses at some point and own up to the behavior and make some changes. You are your problem, but also the solution! Don't give up on yourself. Find reasons that you want to get healthy for - post pictures and phrases on your wall or mirror at home for motivation. But don't think that you are powerless - you CAN change. You just have to want it bad enough. Once you decide that enough is enough, you will find a way to stop. Will it be easy? Hell no! Will it be worth it? Hell yes! Make small goals for yourself and be aware of what you are eating - and that starts with tracking. Even the worst possible binge you ever had. Once you see it written down and how many calories you just ate, and how much time you need to spend working out to burn it, you will start making small changes and start your road to recovery and health.0
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It's not about being hungry. I will often eat until I'm on the verge of vomiting. I understand that I have a serious problem. Even if I take my own snacks to work (which I did today) I will eat them TOO or I'll eat the other snacks instead.
Have you considered seeing a therapist? There are therapists that specialize in food addiction.0 -
Track your foods, every bite. I find that really puts it into perspective.
also - if you can not check out food addict meetings, check out websites for them. It's hard to get control of this BUT YOU CAN. check my profile quote out. It says it all.
its MIND OVER MATTER girl! you just have to teach yourself and train yourself to understand how to deal with this.
we've all been there. I still consider myself a food addict. I still want to binge. It's an addiction just like alcohol drugs or cigarettes. We are addicted to food for reasons. Find out why you are so addicted to it and change that!
Yesterday someone had a birthday celebration here at work - cake and ice cream! UGH! I did NOT eat it. In fact, i did not even go into the room of which it was placed. I forced myself to logically think about the outcome. We think we love food, but it doesnt love us. Do not fuel the fire!
go read my profile quote. I made it up and its mine but it applies to me, you and everyone here in all aspects whether it be food, love, relationships, life, etc....0 -
Look into OA. One of the best things I've done for myself lately. It might seem crazy / cultish, but the group support of people who struggle with the same issues is amazing. I've found really great support there, really great people, and really great advice on dealing with food issues and alternative coping strategies.
I read through some of the back posts, and I see that people have already suggested it, and that you can't fit it in your schedule, don't believe in god, etc. Okay. Firstly, you don't need to believe in God to get a benefit out of their program, and no one will ever push God on you, if anything, God is a bit of a private topic that people don't talk a whole lot about. Secondly, you can do phone meetings. Thirdly, maybe you can just check out some of their literature and use it on your own, see if anything resonates with you. They have some kind of workbook that I think you can do yourself.
Please be open to the idea that your resistance to seeking help is coming from the part of you that is holding onto your eating disorder and making you sick. I hope you find some peace, this is a really painful thing to go through, and it's all the more painful because most people don't understand it very well.0 -
I like this. I'm going to print it and keep it with me.
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WOW that is really really hard! you are in a very very toxic environment! how can *anyone* not overindulge when faced with chex and slushies! I am very good at work in terms of not overeating, precisely because we *don't* have junk around. we do our best to support each other in this - people even stopped bringing in chocolates when returning from business trips (it used to be a very strong unwritten rule). If we want anything , we have to go down to the little kiosk (two flights down and on the other side of the building) or venture outdoors...It's becoming an every day thing and I'm sabotaging myself and it's really getting upsetting.
Two months ago, I lost 12 lbs in about a month and it was great. I was really happy with myself and proud. And then I started a new job. Not only did I go from 8 hours a day on my feet in retail to a desk job, but I went from a store without even a microwave to a haven for my fat brain. I sit at my desk for 8 hours a day, only getting up to pee and eat. And the kitchen is filled with free snacks.
There's a movie popcorn machine, two flavors of Faygo slushies, garlic (my favorite) Chex Mix with Cheez its (my favorite of the cheese crackers), M&M trail mix, and Cinnamon Toast Crunch.
Every day, I eat at least two Styrofoam cups-worth of one or more of the snacks and have at least two slushies. The Chex Mix alone has 130 calories in half a cup and I'll easily go through two or three cups a day. One day the air was broken and I had 6 slushies. I eat lunch and then I go and get popcorn. Then I go back to my desk and 20 minutes later I go get Chex Mix and a slushie. Then I come home to chips and guac, Cheez Its, or some other snack food that my mother has bought. This weekend I ate an entire costco sized tub of italian pasta salad. AND an entire box of Cheez Its.
I have no idea how to stop this. I can't avoid it because I have to walk past it all to put my lunch in the refrigerator and to get to the bathroom. I don't even track it, which ruins my entire day and I almost never track past lunch because I get upset with myself and give up. Every single day. In the past two months I've put on all of the weight that I lost before and it's honestly so depressing that I've seriously considered weight loss surgery that is against my personal morals.
How do I stop this so I can lose weight and get past this point in my life? I'm really not looking for someone to tell me to just stop eating it because I already have someone who doesn't understand what I'm going through and I don't need more.
The first thing I would do is bring this up with HR. someone is buying all this junk, right? Whose brainchild is this - in what universe did someone think it is a good idea to have junk/sugar/empty calories available for sedentary employees all.day.long? if they insist on supplying food, then maybe ask for some healthy choices as well (fruit, cheese sticks, healthy crackers, etc). and really - if that doesn't work, i'm sorry to say, but I wouldn't be staying at that job. I don't think it's a question of binging, will power, OA, or anything like that - you are in a very unhealthy situation. It's like an alcoholic working in a liqueor store where employees are offered free drinks all day long. as strong as someone is going to be, it's a recipe for disaster. it's hard enough to stick to a diet without additional obstacles.
good luck!0 -
Don't mind the people who are trying to minimize your problems by pointing out that it could be worse. They don't understand the nature of your disorder.
As for overcoming it, it is possible to do on your own, but it might be easier with the help of a therapist. Here's an interesting article by a woman who managed to beat her BED:
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/02/20/health/20brod.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0
Cliff's Notes version: planning your meals is key, and do not fast.0 -
try getting less snacks when you get up, don't fill the cup all the way, only half or something like that. its not much, but it may help0
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Unfortunately I work 55 hours a week, so it's not possible to attend any sort of meeting.
make time
^^^THIS^^^ You need to make your health a priority--eating garbage does not contribute to better health. OA meetings are scheduled at all times of the day and evening (and some are even on weekends I believe). You don't even have to attend meetings once you get your sponsor and call in regularly. You can find them listed in your local directory or you can check out their website for a local meeting near you. Please seek help before this problem becomes a major obstacle in your life. Good luck.0 -
Unfortunately I work 55 hours a week, so it's not possible to attend any sort of meeting.
If you really want to correct this problem, you will make time. I work 50+ hours a week as well(and many other people on here do, too!) and we all make time even if it's just one hour to make it to the gym, or to take ourselves one step closer to our goals. If you are eating to the verge of almost vomiting than this is a problem that you need to get fixed.
What is worse? Squeezing in an hour or two a week to see someone about this addiction and treating it, or making time down the road for an illness or sickness due to this problem? Nip it now while you can.
I wish you the best of luck! This problem won't solve itself. You need to put the work into this. I have faith that you can do this! :flowerforyou:0 -
Look into OA. One of the best things I've done for myself lately. It might seem crazy / cultish, but the group support of people who struggle with the same issues is amazing. I've found really great support there, really great people, and really great advice on dealing with food issues and alternative coping strategies.
I read through some of the back posts, and I see that people have already suggested it, and that you can't fit it in your schedule, don't believe in god, etc. Okay. Firstly, you don't need to believe in God to get a benefit out of their program, and no one will ever push God on you, if anything, God is a bit of a private topic that people don't talk a whole lot about. Secondly, you can do phone meetings. Thirdly, maybe you can just check out some of their literature and use it on your own, see if anything resonates with you. They have some kind of workbook that I think you can do yourself.
Please be open to the idea that your resistance to seeking help is coming from the part of you that is holding onto your eating disorder and making you sick. I hope you find some peace, this is a really painful thing to go through, and it's all the more painful because most people don't understand it very well.
I've known a number of people who have benefited greatly from OA--and the best part is that it is completely free!0 -
"I'm really not looking for someone to tell me to just stop eating it because I already have someone who doesn't understand what I'm going through and I don't need more."
If you don't want us to tell you to quit eating, there's not much we can do. YOU have to take responsibility. Nobody is holding a gun to your head and forcing you to eat Chex Mix and Cheez-its, which are nasty and worthless imitations of food. If you don't want to be a size 26 at the wedding, you're going to have to rustle up some self-control and leave the junk alone. Bring your own healthy snacks and quit with the crap. And if you really don't have the ability to just say no and stick to it, then you have an eating disorder and need to see a therapist. There's no magic bullet. Good luck to you.0 -
From reading your responses to others responses I get the feeling you have an addictive personality, the binge eating and the workaholic comments you make about yourself. I am bipolar and I also have an addictive personality and I have allowed myself to binge eat in the past. I shouldn't really say allowed myself because I wasn't totally in contol of all my faculties because I was not on the correct medications at the time. Bipolar disorder is a chemical imbalance in the brain that can result in an addictive personality. I don't know you personally and I am not judging you or saying anything negative about you but you have already stated you have a mental problem in addition to the binge eating and being a workaholic. I would suggest a complete medical work-up to include a mental work-up, hormone balance check, blood tests, thyroid, and physical, etc. as there could very well be a medical cause adding to your eating problems. Also, you need to analyze your stress level, think about it, a new job that is completely different and requires more hours (I presume you're trying to establish yourself in your career field), living in a home where there is always junk food, and a different lifestyle. Now add to this a work environment where there is free junk food (all yummy) that you have to pass each time you need to use the restroom, which is like asking an alcoholic to serve beer all day. I'm sorry, but that would test my will power to the limit and if I brought healthy snacks they would stay in my cooler and if I sipped on water so I had to pee more I would eat more because I walked through the kitchen more.
You have a very complex problem that you have to deal with, this is not just about binge eating. I've read through this entire forum and not one person has suggested there may be a medical issue going on. That would be my first suggestion, see your doctor, get a work up. My second suggestion would be to see a mental health provider because I really think your binge eating is a symptom of a much bigger issue.
I was in denial for years and it took me having a nervous breakdown before I actually acknowledged having problems and sought help.0 -
It's becoming an every day thing and I'm sabotaging myself and it's really getting upsetting.
Two months ago, I lost 12 lbs in about a month and it was great. I was really happy with myself and proud. And then I started a new job. Not only did I go from 8 hours a day on my feet in retail to a desk job, but I went from a store without even a microwave to a haven for my fat brain. I sit at my desk for 8 hours a day, only getting up to pee and eat. And the kitchen is filled with free snacks.
There's a movie popcorn machine, two flavors of Faygo slushies, garlic (my favorite) Chex Mix with Cheez its (my favorite of the cheese crackers), M&M trail mix, and Cinnamon Toast Crunch.
Every day, I eat at least two Styrofoam cups-worth of one or more of the snacks and have at least two slushies. The Chex Mix alone has 130 calories in half a cup and I'll easily go through two or three cups a day. One day the air was broken and I had 6 slushies. I eat lunch and then I go and get popcorn. Then I go back to my desk and 20 minutes later I go get Chex Mix and a slushie. Then I come home to chips and guac, Cheez Its, or some other snack food that my mother has bought. This weekend I ate an entire costco sized tub of italian pasta salad. AND an entire box of Cheez Its.
I have no idea how to stop this. I can't avoid it because I have to walk past it all to put my lunch in the refrigerator and to get to the bathroom. I don't even track it, which ruins my entire day and I almost never track past lunch because I get upset with myself and give up. Every single day. In the past two months I've put on all of the weight that I lost before and it's honestly so depressing that I've seriously considered weight loss surgery that is against my personal morals.
How do I stop this so I can lose weight and get past this point in my life? I'm really not looking for someone to tell me to just stop eating it because I already have someone who doesn't understand what I'm going through and I don't need more.
The people who say this is not a difficult thing, don't understand addiction. You are clearly an addict. OA is not the only answer, see a therapist. Also, there are many, many tips to avoid binging. One thing is to drink some water before you put the first bite in your mouth and force yourself to wait 15 minutes.....most of the time you can muster up the will power after waiting.0 -
Consider changing WHAT you eat. No kidding. Binge eating disorder (or any shade of uncontrolled eating) is a real PHYSICAL issue, not merely psychological. Loading up on highly processed, high carb foods deplete micronutrients in the body and even though you are eating "too much" you may still be malnourished. When the body is malnourished, it says EAT, EAT, EAT.
The only thing that resolved binge eating disorder, and cured a bunch of other health problems, is changing WHAT I eat. Not therapy, not willpower, not moderation, not "low fat" dieting, not the 12 steps of Overeaters Anonymous, and certainly not medications.
But if you are sure that it's all just calories in and calories out, as you will undoubtedly be told by most people on MFP, then use your "willpower" and keep enjoying all things in "moderation". Good luck.0 -
My therapist went through this handout with me when I told her I wanted to work on developing alternative coping strategies. There are some great ideas in here that would work for dealing with compulsive overeating. These strategies are basically for when you face a situation that overrides your ability to act rational (like a compulsion to binge). I haven't tried any of them for that (I use them for when I feel like throwing an adult temper tantrum because I can't find my car keys) but it might work in theory.
http://borderlinechat.com/storage/dth1.pdf0 -
Unfortunately I work 55 hours a week, so it's not possible to attend any sort of meeting.
make time
QFT
If you really want to find a way, you will. You can either make the decision to stop shoving food in your mouth when your not hungry or admit you might have a problem and need help and find a way to fix it.
Time may be scarce but you shot down that idea without even looking into the program and seeing if there is a time slot you can make. The majority of us have jobs, kids, or both...but making time for what is going to end up helping you is worth the effort.
Posting on an internet forum might help for about 3 seconds, but if you shoot down the sound advice with excuses, then you're not really ready to do what it takes to make it happen.
Ok, fine. I'll play. The ONE meeting in my area in a time and day that I can attend is 15 miles away. I'm aware of OA and I have read all about OA. I am not a religious person and I do not need to find god. I do not need to be preached to. I shot it down without going any further because I didn't want to offend people. Obviously I have not been afforded that same courtesy here.
Here is how I am interpreting YOUR posts: "I am a binge eater, and I recognize I have a problem. HOWEVER, I am not ready to make a change because a) I keep finding excuses for not changing and b) if anyone suggests help, they are going to be shot down immediately and called rude because I keep referring back to a.
YOUR problem, YOU need to change. Sorry to be so harsh, but if you don't want the help, and it sounds like you really aren't "there yet" (point of surrender and willingness to change), then you really shouldn't be here asking for advice you won't take.
If you ARE at the point, then LISTEN to the advice here and TAKE it.0 -
As others have posted it is truely mind over matter and you do have to make a conscious effort to put the fork down. Please seek professional help, I thought for years that I could deal with my binge eating and bulima alone. Some therapy approaches aren't for everyone. A good first step-Read Brain Over Binge if you truely want to understand why you are doing it, it explains how to control the "animal" part of your brain- that binges (even when food is readily available) and put yourself intune with the rational part of your brain.0
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You are ignoring all the good, helpful posts/people to argue with the ones you don't agree with.0
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One way to save yourself is to eat the popcorn plain or with a little lite butter, forget the slushis and other high cal/carb crap and bring in ice tea or bottled water. When you get home eat a good mixed green salad and use the Chexmix as croutons and the Cheeszits as cat litter. This is from Mel's Aunties husband.0
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Sending you an invitation to join an emotional eating group.
Read the posts from others, you will find others with your problems
and some nice people with helpful tips.
Good Luck!0 -
People are in two minds, it's either mind over matter, or it's an addiction, either way, the power is in your hands.
If you are binging because you are addicted then you MUSt take yourself out the environment, and you MUST seek help. If you are addicted, do not replace the snacks with anything else. How much does one person have to snack in a work day?
Common rule between the two mindsets, no snacking between your meals. Stuffing your face with carrots and hummus is not going to help you. Drink tea (NOT sugary tea) and water, but you really don't need that much food if you're sat down all day...even if you feel hungry.
If you are binging because you have no will power then you have to make the decision to stop. Give yourself the power. Think of it this way: the food does not crawl into your mouth. YOU have to get up, fill the cup, sit down, and methodically put that food in your mouth. Resist at every stage. Test yourself. DON"T get up, DO NOT fill the cup, DO NOT eat the food.
None of know which camp you fall into, but no one can fix this but you. Honestly, don't fall into the trap of thinking it's bigger than you, it's not, have a little self belief and do it for yourself, no one else can0 -
I am so sorry and I do know how hard this is. I do so well on my eating plan until I walk into a meeting and there are pastries, and croissants, and gooey other things just sitting there. I find my will-power and ignore those and then a huge bowl of candy bars goes onto the table. Okay, they're just "mini" snacks, right? Just one. Then just another one. Then I've eaten 5. I would not go BUY something like that, but there it sits on the table, within arms reach.
If the break room is full of goodies, then the break room may need to be "off limits" to you a few days a week.
Good luck on your journey to health.0
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