Why do people say that?

Who cares what people say. People have told me the same thing, even after losing only 10lbs. I know what my goals are and where I want to be. Do what makes you feel happy.

I get that a lot. Sometimes I know it is people who are threatened by my success because they are struggling themselves, then there are people like my mom who worries I will develop an eating disorder, then there are the people who think that is what they should say because really are they going to say... "yeah I thought you could stand to lose some more" after they just congratulated you on your success.
Take everything with a grain of salt. You and your body know your ideal weight and you don't need to justify yourself to anyone.

I don't get this until I tell people how much more I have to lose. I think its a disconnect between how much you have lost already how they visibly see you now and then some skewed mental picture that they see of you when their brain tries to figure out how much 40 more lbs (for me) is going to look like.

I also think that So many people around us are obese and even overweight that people don't really know what a healthy weight looks like. They have become so accustomed to seeing fat overweight people that when they hear your final goal weight it is a shock because their mental image of what you should look like does not at all match what you just told them.

I just had an argument with mom for the very SAME thing. You have do what is healthiest and satisfying to you. Good Luck and Keep on Keeping ON!

I think it's a combo of being polite, being guilty, and having a skewed image of what a "healthy weight" is. I know when I think of someone who is "thin," they're really just a healthy weight. And when I think of someone as "average," they're overweight, probably bordering on obese.

I've heard the same things lately and I'm your height and weigh 17 pounds more than you (I have the birthin' hips going for me as well). If I tell someone how much more weight I want to lose (at a minimum - 40 pounds), their jaws drop open like I'm nuts. But the reality is I can probably easily lose 40 more -- or even 60 more -- and be healthy.

I have found people really don't have a concept of what 125, 150, 175, 200, etc lbs looks like, because it looks different on each person's body.

^^^in total agreement with this. I don't know if you shared what your goal weight was, giving context of your starting weight or only gave the number of pounds you want to lose. Even at my heaviest, friends and family were amazed at the number because I carried it "well." :ohwell:
Congrats on your loss and GL for continued progress!

It's so reassuring to see that other people have this issue too, and to know that if I come on here people will be encouraging and not tell me that I'm going to be anorexic just because I'm shooting for a BMI of 22, which is still 23 lbs. away.

Before I started to lose weight, people would always say, 'You look great, I'd never know you weighed that much!' or 'It's all in your boobs!' Yes, I am large-chested, but I KNOW that I'm not just carrying 40 extra pounds in my chest! And just because I 'look good' because I distribute fat evenly doesn't mean that I'm healthy.

This is why I love MFP -- people here are great and encouraging, even when we might not get all that we want from the people around us in our lives.

They say it because we can't assess just with a naked eye how much a certain amount of weight looks on any one person. It's like when you gain weight and finally weigh and you think "Wow, I didn't think I was that much!" because everyone's fat is distributed different ways. 10 lbs on my guy looks a lot different than 10 lbs on me. 10 lbs on me is EVERYWHERE. For him, it's a tiny belly. Remove that and he looks instantly slimmer. From me... well, I still have 20 to go anyway... but really, just looking at him, I guessed he'd gained 5 lbs, not 10. It's just how we perceive certain things.

Regardless of why people say that, whether they're being sincere or not, my advice would be to stop losing when YOU want to. You'll know better than anyone else when you feel good about yourself.

I get that too! I don't know what the deal is. I lost about 100 lbs. 5 years ago (310 down to 210), and people were concerned when I told them I wanted to be below 200 lbs. I think people have a certain concept in their mind of the other people they know, and if it changes to much they get unconfortable with it regardless of whether it's a positive or negative change. I'm sure it's subconcious. People knew me as being fat, so when I wasn't fat anymore all of a sudden it was "don't lose TOO much weight!" I'd say "Are you crazy? I still have a belly." Right now I'm still trying to get to 200. It's been a magical number for me for a long, long time. But I could be around 180 and still be quite healthy.

My wife has similiar issues. She is only 5', and weighed under 115 all through high school. Now she's over 120, and people think she's nuts when she says she wants to lose weight. 5-10 lbs. is a LOT to gain or lose for someone that small. Sure, she could stay 120, but next thing you know it would be 125, then 135 and so on. It's all about a healthy lifestyle with good habits that can last a lifetime, and heading off small bad habits before they turn into big ones.

I could understand how it might be guilt or jealousy when it comes from other girls. What I don't get is when guys tell me that I don't need to lose any weight. They go on and on about how perfect stick-thin girls on TV are and they call anyone on TV fat if they weigh more than 120 pounds, and then they go and tell me I don't need to lose weight? The only explanation that I can think of is that they just don't care what I look like. I just have to make my own goals for myself.

I tend to believe it's a bit of a primal evolutionary trait to want to mate with a woman who has a little "meat on her bones" (ie -- has extra weight on her to carry and produce a healthy child even in those possible periods of famine). But the optimal mate also needs to be physically fit and healthy.

There is another part that people don't seem to be talking about. People get used to seeing others at a certain weight, and the change seems jarring when someone gains or loses because they are not used to looking at the person at anything but the size they knew them before at.

Example, my friend, who I agree was overweight, lost a lot of weight in a short period of time, so when I saw him again, he looked completely different. Was he underweight? No, but that didn't stop my mind from thinking that he lost too much at first, until I could get used to the new look. I meant nothing by it, and logically I knew I was wrong, but emotionally I couldn't help what I thought.

It takes a while for people to get used to how another person looks. It is just how the human mind works. The commenters could mean absolutely nothing behind what they say, and they are perfectly correct to say it /from their point of view/. Just give it a little while, and they will be able to see you for what you look like now, not what you look like in their mind's eye.

Honestly I find it more discouraging than annoying. I had two friends say similar things to me just yesterday. I'm 5'8" so a healthy weight range would be between roughly 121 and 165 according to MFP so I set an initial goal weight of 140. When I shared this with them they look shocked and disturbed. They seemed to generally agree that I shouldn't get smaller than 180 or I would have the dreaded "my head's too big for my body" look. Ever since then I've been second guessing the goal weight I set for myself. What's more because I've always been over weight and don't know what I'd look like at 140 I'm wondering if maybe they're right. I hate that they put that bug in my ear.........

I think its due to a few things happening at once. Part of its because change is difficult, and other people don't like it (even if change is necessary) status quo makes people feel secure. Another part is the whole "obesity epidemic" or whatever you want to call it. We're getting used to seeing bigger people, and if you already dress with at least of little style, look presentable, we're getting more and more OK with weight and seeing it less and less as a problem. Another is I think is big butts being popular(?) now. I don't get it, 10 years ago size 8 was way too big, now I'm a size 14-16 and all my perv neighbors tell me they'd like it bigger. (?!?!?!!!!!?) Pear shaped has started to be almost idealized by some people, so you might here from them a lot (I do!) that you shouldn't loose any weight.

I just take it as a compliment, but I don't let myself get deluded about it. When people tell me I look good, I just silently remind myself that I do look good, for 200 lbs. And when they tell me I shouldn't loose any weight, I just assume they don't know what they're talking about!

You know what i just heard this a few weeks ago. I was at 175 and lost 16 lbs My goal is to get as near to 130 as I can. I actually think they say those things because their idea of loosing weight consists of your stomach shrinking and your face. They dont seem to put in perspective that its not only face and stomach but its bust, butt, thights, claves, arms. KWIM It dosent really bother me really cuz to me its like telling me I look goooooood so really I just take it as a compliment and move on and continue to try and reach my goal.