I'm over it.
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Screw moderation, calorie counting and restricting. Add more veggies to your diet. I would avoid frozen vegetable (mostly because I think that gross). Stop worrying about how much you're eating and start focusing on what you're eating. Vegetables are good for you and they're low in calories.
What came first? The chicken or the egg? (excuse the non-vegan joke.. haha. just kidding)
Paying attention to calories in/calories out encourages eating more veggies because they are low in calories. Adding more veggies on top of an already unhealthily high calorie diet does nothing for you.
I was super fat for years when I was vegan. I was also super fat at a vegetarian. I was super fat and cutting meat, dairy, eggs out of my diet didn't solve it.
Paying attention to how much of what I was eating solved it. I needed more protein, less complex carbs. I needed less sugar. I needed to move more, eat less, and eat better. Yes, that involved eating more veggies. But it also involved eating less breads, cakes, burritos, bagels, and a bunch of other stuff.
OP:
My advice is listen to ConcreteGirl on this one. Whatever changes you make to lose weight must be changes you can sustain once you have lost weight. Maybe your caloric allowance will go up when you hit goal, but your habits will certainly need to be different than they are now or what they were to get you overweight in the first place. THat's why it's a lifestyle change. Live like a skinny and fit person and you will become a skinny and fit person. Pretty simple. And if what you are doing isn't sustainable, it will not lead to success.
Me myself personally, loggin is sustainable. In intend to log for the rest of my life. I may be less anal about it at times, but I plan on paying attention to how much I eat and how much I work out. Exercising regularly is something I will do for the rest of my life. Running 2-3x's a week is sustainable. Resistance training 3-4x's a week is sustainable. I find these things to be entertaining and they make me happy to do. I intend to eat sweets now and again, in both my weight loss "journey" and when I am skinny (ok, I'm skinny now, but I ate chocolate every day that I was losing weight). I eat carbs. I just eat a lot less of those things than I used to, and I balance it with exercise better (ie. if I wanna pig out, I run like a roadrunner and then I eat like a beast!)0 -
I had to be patient and slow to lose those stubborn ten pounds. Slow can often mean making your brain feel defeated and like the whole thing is impossible. Slow seems like a plateau. I just had faith in the calorie deficit; I believed that as long as I logged, weighed and measured, and stayed at or below TDEE I would not gain. I had to believe that I didn't really gain five pounds when the scale said I did. I lost at a rate of about .3 of a pound a week, the scale isn't going to pick that up in a hurry! Having my calories set higher like just 5 - 10 % below TDEE made it easier. I ate 1500, then 1600 and slowly up to 2000. Now I'm at about 1800 - 1900 to maintain. That's all I did and it worked! If I went over TDEE I split the difference over the next few days and was practicing maintenance. I didn't eat back exercise calories most of the time. It really is that simple. I also didn't start resistance exercises until after I reached goal weight, for medical reasons. It's all good and keep it simple!!!0
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Hi! I've noticed some things you mentioned that could be issues: inconsistency and fad dieting.
I've found that it helps (big time) to think of it as 'changing your lifestyle,' and not dieting. That right there will help with the consistency. I still have work to do on myself, but I have improved greatly.
For example: I drank pop 24/7, mindlessly ate & never exercised. I know, what a great lifestyle, huh? lol
Well, I started kicking one habit at a time. I quit drinking pop. I refused to! And once I felt that I was successful (after a few months), I worked on kicking another habit - I began to exercise. And once that routine was set in pretty good, I quit mindlessly eating.
I know your situation is probably different than mine (you goal weight is MUCH closer), but the bottom line is to change your mentality. Our minds are very powerful, but YOU CAN CONTROL THEM! (At least most of the time.)
Just remember, you want to make one change at a time to better yourself - to attempt to reach total wellness. You'll get there. :-)
Thank you for your comment. I appreciate your sincerity.
I used to drink pop all the time as well, then I quit drinking it -- except for on special occasions or just once in a while. I actually went a whole couple years without touching it at all.
I think it's important for people to realize that everyone's weight-gain stories are not the same. I did not gain those almost 50 pounds because I was stuffing my face constantly. I gained them because i went through major health problems a couple years ago which required surgeries, months of treatments, countless medications and weight-gaining steroids, many hospital stays, and more.
Saying "it's not all my fault" is not a cop-out -- it's just the facts. I've NEVER been an overweight person -- in fact, my doctor thought I was going to be a midget because of how petite and tiny I always was. I beat that odd, as well as beat the odds of his prediction that I was going to be deaf.
Sometimes I think people offer harsh advice without knowing the whole story -- but how could they know if they weren't made aware? Regardless, be kind to everyone, because we all go through hard times at different points in our lives. Share a smile and some encouragement because you never know how much good it will do for that person.
Thanks for being an encouragement.0 -
Okay ... I get it, been there. I've decided I'm going to do it this time. So, I do not cut out any major food group. I allow myself a little of those things that trip you up if you deny yourself. I never try to loose more than half a pound to a pound a week. Sometimes I loose more, sometimes I loose less, and sometimes I gain. As long as my general direction is down, I'm fine with it. I don't give myself permission to fail, but I don't beat myself up when I stumble. The only way to fail at this is to quit, you will have good days and bad days and sometimes the bad days will be overwhelming. Remember it is temporary, and the good days will come again.0
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and I want to add that a huge part of making this whole thing sustainable is letting go of the bad feelings that come when we mess up, and just getting back to it.... or letting go of guilty for unhealthy choices. Sometimes I want to eat that 400 calorie cupcake and I don't have time to run and if I do so, I do so with intent and awareness that it's against my goals. I will allow myself to do this on rare occasions. It's ok now and again.0
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Okay ... I get it, been there. I've decided I'm going to do it this time. So, I do not cut out any major food group. I allow myself a little of those things that trip you up if you deny yourself. I never try to loose more than half a pound to a pound a week. Sometimes I loose more, sometimes I loose less, and sometimes I gain. As long as my general direction is down, I'm fine with it. I don't give myself permission to fail, but I don't beat myself up when I stumble. The only way to fail at this is to quit, you will have good days and bad days and sometimes the bad days will be overwhelming. Remember it is temporary, and the good days will come again.
Sounds perfect! Do this and you will lose.0 -
Just wanted to add a note on the restriction thing... I'd tried just about every diet out there too and always failed because of the deprivation involved. But I didn't even realize it until my best friend asked me why I the last diet didn't work. I'd been on Atkins for a year and lost 45-50 pounds then I went on vacation and was re-introduced to all these wonderful foods I'd been missing out on (bread, pizza, yogurt with fruit and granola for breakfast, etc) and I just couldn't face going back on the plan after that. So I just gave in to everything and gained all the weight back.
But I digress...back to the question...at first I dismissed it with a comment about "oh that's in the past, I'm ready to face the future" but her question just wouldn't get out of my head so I decided to really think about it and I realized the whole restriction thing was the problem. So when I started losing weight again a few years ago, not only was a I determined to finally do it this time, I had a secret weapon - knowing WHY all the other diets didn't work! I've continued to enjoy pizza and chocolate and all that, I just make healthier choices and keep my portions low. Wish I'd figured all this out years ago!!
Best of luck to you!!0 -
Its been really great getting some of the information here from all of these posters and, OP, I hope that you are getting a sense that we are all here with you and support you in fighting the good fight for healthy living!! It is very true that a good deal of education into what you eat, your specific caloric needs and understanding your body are all necessary in changing your lifestyle and effectively losing weight. This journey has been a long one for me as well, and the more that I learn, the healthier and fitter I get. I was at a plateau for a long time, about a year, and doing everything right but feeling awful. I gave up a couple of times, came back, gave up, etc, but when I started sharing my frustrations with my pilates instructor, she directed me to a physical therapist, and a few more referrals later I ended up in a doc's office who, after a series of tests, discovered that I had had intestinal parasites for a very long time and had jacked up my digestive system, my hormone levels, and my metabolism. Its been 9 months since my diagnosis (6 months parasite free!!!!) and I feel so much better and can actually lose weight now. I have to work very very hard at precisely eating only foods that my body can tolerate, otherwise I get completely out of whack, but the pay off of all this work is fantastic. I have my life back!!!
All of this to say, it is a hard journey, but you really, really have to make this about learning about yourself and your body. There is no single answer for everyone. Some people work great a vegetarians. Me, I have to eat mostly meats, though I used to be vegetarian. You have to make studying YOU your central task. WW doesn't work for you. Good, you know that now. The default setting on MFP don't work for you. Great! Keep experimenting until you find what does!!! Don't give up! Health is sooooo fantastic. You deserve to feel great, and you deserve to be properly cared for. Learn how to do that!0 -
Anyone have any motivation or tips on how to make this better? Because, honestly, I'm over it (which I've said 27 times already).
Go slow and steady. Calculate what your maintenance calories would be for your goal weight (calculating your tdee at the activity level you can honestly see yourself staying with long term), and eat that. Eventually, the weight will come off, no dieting or deprivation or exercising your *kitten* off required.0 -
Commit to logging every day even bad days, build a network of supportive friends, do not consider a diet, learn how to live healthy. Good luck.0
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Moderation is the key. I just had a piece of birthday cake here at work. We have one big party every month. So, I am gonna go over today.........I don't care, I don't do it very often, but when I do its not a worry. I look at my calories each day of course, but I also look at the weekly and monthly averages. If I am over 5 days out of the month, but I hit my monthly number the loss will be exactly the same as if I was dead on each day. So, relax and develop a healthy relationship with food.0
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Bumping to read later, because I get this way also! Especially on days when I feel really sorry for myself and just want to throw in the towel and be frustrated!!! Thank you for asking the question!0
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On top of some already great advice, I would like to add, do some goal setting! Write out where you want to be in a week (i.e. consistently logging), a month (exercising 3 days a week), a year, etc. Setting small attainable goals for myself has been a huge part of my success so far. Sharing these goals with someone (for me, it's here & facebook) keeps you accountable, and therefore motivated. I want to emphasize too, that these goals should not for the most part have to do with the number on the scale. My goals through this summer include being able to run up to 9 miles. I'm to 6 at this point, where a couple months ago I could not even run 10 yards. I'm also doing a 6 week pushup challenge, and going to a squat challenge, and ballet boot camp.
I hope you are able to make things work this time. I understand the frustration, because I've been there before. At least twice I've lost a significant amount of weight (30 lbs both times), then jumped right off the wagon at the first sign of stress or other issues. This time is different. It's a life change, not a diet. I don't see myself ever being inactive again. So I just want to encourage you not to give up.0 -
I really enjoyed reading this thread. It was a nice fresh escape from the threads that can get mean and nasty. It was very informative and encouraging. I applaud to the people who have responded. You have not only helped OP, but me as well. When I was on MFP a few years ago, it was simply eat 1200 calories and then eat back your exercise cals. Never did I read anything about TDEE, so that is new to me, too. I do have a question though. There are many TDEE calculators out there, and they all give different responses. Which one is reliable?0
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This is FANTASTIC advice. I'm such an "all or nothing" type person that when i slip up, I tend to give up. I'm learning that it's okay to fall off the wagon occasionally. What's NOT acceptable is staying off the wagon. I'm learning to give myself permission to not do this perfectly. What's important is consistency, not perfection. Thanks so much for posting this. I needed to hear it today.and I want to add that a huge part of making this whole thing sustainable is letting go of the bad feelings that come when we mess up, and just getting back to it.... or letting go of guilty for unhealthy choices. Sometimes I want to eat that 400 calorie cupcake and I don't have time to run and if I do so, I do so with intent and awareness that it's against my goals. I will allow myself to do this on rare occasions. It's ok now and again.0 -
Do you like who you see in the mirror? If not it is up to you and you alone to fix it. And please don't look at this as a quick fix thing because that is how people gain all the weight back. This is something you are doing for you for the rest of your life.0
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A previous poster linked to this one: http://scoobysworkshop.com/calorie-calculator/
The calories seem high, but they said this is normal so.... here's for hoping!I really enjoyed reading this thread. It was a nice fresh escape from the threads that can get mean and nasty. It was very informative and encouraging. I applaud to the people who have responded. You have not only helped OP, but me as well. When I was on MFP a few years ago, it was simply eat 1200 calories and then eat back your exercise cals. Never did I read anything about TDEE, so that is new to me, too. I do have a question though. There are many TDEE calculators out there, and they all give different responses. Which one is reliable?0 -
i am happy for you, OP, because you haven't actually gotten to a point of giving up--hence, your asking for help. and i'm proud of all the fantastic advice MFP members have so freely given, especially 1concretegirl. i needed to see this, too
it really boils down to building a sustainable lifestyle; you've been given all the tools, so it's time to put them into action! i've been eating better (TDEE-20%) and exercising....progress is still very slow for me but it's better than when i started you can do this! 0 -
I promise you. You should try insanity.0
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You can calculate here, http://scoobysworkshop.com/calorie-calculator/. It will look like a lot of calories, and it is, because you can eat that much and lose.
Ok, when I did the calculator, this is what I got:
BMR: 1436
TDEE: 1975
So you should be eating approximately 1750 calories per day to lose weight
It sounds like a lot, I know. But you already know that over-restricting didn't work for you, so it's time to try something better.
Slowly increase your calories by about 100 per week until you get to 1750, then sit there for a month. The weight will start dropping.
Be super accurate with your logging. Respect your macros. This truly works.
THANK YOU! I really appreciate all of your help! I will do this!
Remember, they said slowly up to 1750 and sit there a MONTH. Don't put on a few lbs between here and there, freak out, and suddenly drop your intake again. Give it the the suggested amount of time.0 -
Bounce0
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I really enjoyed reading this thread. It was a nice fresh escape from the threads that can get mean and nasty. It was very informative and encouraging. I applaud to the people who have responded. You have not only helped OP, but me as well. When I was on MFP a few years ago, it was simply eat 1200 calories and then eat back your exercise cals. Never did I read anything about TDEE, so that is new to me, too. I do have a question though. There are many TDEE calculators out there, and they all give different responses. Which one is reliable?
Fitbits take the guesswork out. I should've got one from the get go. I was using the one with the biggest calorie allowance. Lol my real tdee was significantly less.0 -
I know a lot of us here totally understand your frustration. We've all been there. The thing that separates us people that keep going and the people that give up is the fact that the people that keep going have come to terms with the facts.....weight loss will not happen fast (if it's done in a healthy way)......it's not about dieting it's about changing the way you live.....it's not about the way you look it's about the way you feel....and most important think about all the years that have gone by and you've sat there saying damn time flies. Just think this time next year you could be sitting there saying to yourself that you are so proud and happy that you stuck with it.0
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You have to give a D***, if no one else cares, you should. It's your body and if you want it to be a certain way, you have to work for it. As a woman that has been there you just have to continue on, get your head in it. Live strong and don't give in to self doubt. Diet? No Ma'am, eat, but eat healthy... Fruits, vegetables, lean meats... Eating less will only slow you metabolism... Also, find something that grasps your attention like an aerobics class (i.e. Zumba, Bokwa). Some place where you are not alone and there are other people in your situation, wanting to look good and have fun doing. At the least, find a workout buddy, someone who willl and can motivate you and vice versa. Whatever you do, don't give up or give into the phrase, "I can't," because you can... Just think positively...0
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Okay ... I get it, been there. I've decided I'm going to do it this time. So, I do not cut out any major food group. I allow myself a little of those things that trip you up if you deny yourself. I never try to loose more than half a pound to a pound a week. Sometimes I loose more, sometimes I loose less, and sometimes I gain. As long as my general direction is down, I'm fine with it. I don't give myself permission to fail, but I don't beat myself up when I stumble. The only way to fail at this is to quit, you will have good days and bad days and sometimes the bad days will be overwhelming. Remember it is temporary, and the good days will come again.
LOVE THIS!! Thank you!0 -
Okay ... I get it, been there. I've decided I'm going to do it this time. So, I do not cut out any major food group. I allow myself a little of those things that trip you up if you deny yourself. I never try to loose more than half a pound to a pound a week. Sometimes I loose more, sometimes I loose less, and sometimes I gain. As long as my general direction is down, I'm fine with it. I don't give myself permission to fail, but I don't beat myself up when I stumble. The only way to fail at this is to quit, you will have good days and bad days and sometimes the bad days will be overwhelming. Remember it is temporary, and the good days will come again.
LOVE THIS!! Thank you!
Forgiveness.
You have to be able to forgive your own mistakes or the regret will defeat you.0 -
This is FANTASTIC advice. I'm such an "all or nothing" type person that when i slip up, I tend to give up. I'm learning that it's okay to fall off the wagon occasionally. What's NOT acceptable is staying off the wagon. I'm learning to give myself permission to not do this perfectly. What's important is consistency, not perfection. Thanks so much for posting this. I needed to hear it today.and I want to add that a huge part of making this whole thing sustainable is letting go of the bad feelings that come when we mess up, and just getting back to it.... or letting go of guilty for unhealthy choices. Sometimes I want to eat that 400 calorie cupcake and I don't have time to run and if I do so, I do so with intent and awareness that it's against my goals. I will allow myself to do this on rare occasions. It's ok now and again.
I, too, tend to be an "all or nothing at all" type of person. I found her comment very helpful as well. 0 -
I promise you. You should try insanity.
What is Insanity?0 -
I have not lost alot of weight yet but I have put it in my head that I am not on a diet but I am going to change the way I look at food. I have been seriously watching my intake for only about 2 weeks so I am not a pro at this but I found that if you beat yourself up and make yourself unhappy if you eat a cookie this lifestyle change will never work. I think its truly just about moderation and trying to do at least some form of excersize at least every other day. I have started eating my meals on a salad plate and I can honestly say I am not hungry with the smaller portions. I think we all just are used to filing our plates because the food is there. So lets all continue to motivate eachother and share our success stories and tricks on overcoming the obstacles.0
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I have not lost alot of weight yet but I have put it in my head that I am not on a diet but I am going to change the way I look at food. I have been seriously watching my intake for only about 2 weeks so I am not a pro at this but I found that if you beat yourself up and make yourself unhappy if you eat a cookie this lifestyle change will never work. I think its truly just about moderation and trying to do at least some form of excersize at least every other day. I have started eating my meals on a salad plate and I can honestly say I am not hungry with the smaller portions. I think we all just are used to filing our plates because the food is there. So lets all continue to motivate eachother and share our success stories and tricks on overcoming the obstacles.
I love your idea of a salad plate. Thanks for the ideas!0
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