People want so desperately to be the exception...

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  • Cp731
    Cp731 Posts: 3,195 Member
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    We all want the *kitten* guy

    Um, speak for yourself. :huh:
  • _Pseudonymous_
    _Pseudonymous_ Posts: 1,671 Member
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    I Blame Twilight.
  • Cp731
    Cp731 Posts: 3,195 Member
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    I Blame Twilight.

    :flowerforyou:
  • ggxx100
    ggxx100 Posts: 520 Member
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    We all want the *kitten* guy

    Um, speak for yourself. :huh:

    Hah the one part that I disagree with too...I believe the better term is many girls want the unattainable guy-not necessarily the douche. It's in human nature to want what you can't have.

    Proud to say I have never intentionally dated a *kitten* or wanted one-happily settled down with a man that is 100% douche free...even when routinely running into his friends while buying tampons for me :laugh:
  • ahviendha
    ahviendha Posts: 1,291 Member
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    I attribute a lot of this to the incredible amount of coddling and fawning children have been getting for a couple generations. Everyone instilling the idea that you're special, unique, everyone's a winner, everyone gets a trophy, insulating kids from anything and everything that remotely is negative or not full of sunshine and lollipops.

    Then when people reach the real world and try to assimilate they don't understand why they're failing. Why aren't things being handed to them no matter what? Why didn't they get that promotion even though the more qualified person did. Why can't they lose the weight that other person did even though they didn't do 1/10th the work? Etc...

    I'm ranting.

    Good luck everyone. :flowerforyou:

    agree! and agree with OP, what a wonderful post. :drinker:
  • ggxx100
    ggxx100 Posts: 520 Member
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    I attribute a lot of this to the incredible amount of coddling and fawning children have been getting for a couple generations. Everyone instilling the idea that you're special, unique, everyone's a winner, everyone gets a trophy, insulating kids from anything and everything that remotely is negative or not full of sunshine and lollipops.

    Then when people reach the real world and try to assimilate they don't understand why they're failing. Why aren't things being handed to them no matter what? Why didn't they get that promotion even though the more qualified person did. Why can't they lose the weight that other person did even though they didn't do 1/10th the work? Etc...

    I'm ranting.

    Good luck everyone. :flowerforyou:


    agree! and agree with OP, what a wonderful post. :drinker:

    I picked up my niece from daycare and I saw a child who could not have been older than 5 waiting for his parents with his expensive cellphone decked out in Ironman stickers.

    I'm sorry, but the sight of a little tyke yapping away on his iphone is just too much for me. You wonder how everyone becomes entitled and then you witness that...
  • b1essed
    b1essed Posts: 18
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    Like the song says: anything worth having at all is worth working for and waiting for!!!!!
  • Nancy_CM
    Nancy_CM Posts: 20 Member
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    Well said!!

    Saving this to my inspiration boards. Even though I am a very special snowflake, :-) I've got a mighty long road ahead, and am already planning for the days when I want to fret over the slowness, or look for an easier road. So, I have made a space of reminders and tools to help me focus on what I know... my reality... everyone's reality.

    Thanks so much for posting.
  • IronPlayground
    IronPlayground Posts: 1,594 Member
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    Why?

    Why is it so hard for us to accept the reality of things that are too good to be true or just not good for us?

    We all want the *kitten* guy, the get rich quick scheme, the two day diet, the 5 minute facelift, etc... What is wrong with patience and common sense?

    If that guy's a jerk to EVERY other girl, what makes you think he'll treat you different?

    If THOUSANDS of people have lost money to this scheme, why would you be the millionaire?

    ...

    If it seems too easy, why bother? There are things in life that are going to require hard work. That's it. Bottom line. There's no shortcut to success, no matter what area of life. You want to make money and be successful? Work hard. You want a great relationship? Work hard. You want a great body? WORK HARD.

    This is diet and weight loss related because this maddening desire to be the exception is taking over the fitness world. We have to work hard. We have to give ourselves the effort.

    When people tell you to eat more, they're not trying to be mean or insensitive. It's because they've tried what you're doing, thought what you're thinking, and learned from their mistakes. They're trying to help you. You're not the exception.

    When people tell you to lift weights, they're not trying to bash cardio. It's because they've tried what you're doing, thought what you're thinking, and learned from their mistakes. You're not the exception.

    When people tell you those diet pills, wraps, shakes, supplements and VLCDs don't work, THEY'RE NOT TRYING TO BE MEAN OR INSENSITIVE. IT'S BECAUSE THEY'VE TRIED WHAT YOU'RE DOING, THOUGHT WHAT YOU'RE THINKING, AND LEARNED FROM THEIR MISTAKES. YOU'RE NOT THE EXCEPTION.

    You're not the exception. Treat your body right. You're the rule.

    Quote today from Sohee Lee:

    "You don't get to complain about the results you didn't get from the work you didn't do."
  • theCarlton
    theCarlton Posts: 1,344 Member
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    This advice is true for everyone...except for me.
  • bonitacash08
    bonitacash08 Posts: 378 Member
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    This advice is true for everyone...except for me.

    :drinker:
  • da_bears10089
    da_bears10089 Posts: 1,791 Member
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    But what about when that *kitten* guy is mostly douchebaggy to you because he discovered you don't like his creepy friend? Why do guys keep creeps as friends? Like, your guy friend is really creepy when he is over complimenting every chick he works with and even making comments on the color of your lipstick (but is not gay, but brings up how he's still a virgin every chance he can). And I liked the guy (the non creepy one). Whatever, dude.

    But, yes, I understand what the OP is saying totally. There is no magic pill to fix everything.

    uhhhh... wut?
  • SteveJWatson
    SteveJWatson Posts: 1,225 Member
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    in for the forthcoming 'special snowflakery'.
  • RhonndaJ
    RhonndaJ Posts: 1,615 Member
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    Well, this is where I say that you're just preaching to the choir because the people who need to really HEAR this are those who still want to be the exception.
  • musycnlyrics
    musycnlyrics Posts: 323 Member
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    Bad Arguers… This is a free template to generate a bad argument message “proving” your pet scheme is not a scam. This is a DO NOT DO list. Don’t complain when you get ridiculed when your argument end up looking like it came out of this generator.

    Sentence 1: Pick one of the following –

    Lots of hilarious opinions here
    I see a lot of speculation and very little fact
    Bunch of amateur wannabe analysts here.
    You guys have no idea what you’re talking about

    Sentence 1.5: (scheme name) is not a scam.

    Sentence 2: Pick one or more of the following

    Sour grapes — you must be jealous of our success
    You’re not in it— you must be a member to understand us, how it REALLY works
    You just don’t understand us / it / whatever. You don’t have the mindset / positive attitude / training.
    It paid me — and that’s all that matters
    appeal to association with authority — (scheme name) is associated with big names, it can’t possibly be a scam!
    “every thing else is a scam” — social security, federal reserve, IMF, are all scams. Why don’t you go after those?
    anecdotal fallacy — i.e. “It’s not a scam (to me)” and my experience must be the universal truth
    “appeal to age” — (Scheme name) / (Scheme parent company) is X years old! They have to know what they’re doing (to have last this long)!
    “it ain’t a scam unless it’s convicted” — it haven’t been declared illegal (yet!)
    “disgruntled” — you must be bitter from a prior failure
    “Conspiracy” — you must work for a competitor / you’re just out to get hits for your blog / you are the 1% out to keep us 99% poor
    “caveat emptor” — we know what we’re getting into and we don’t like being lectured to!
    “appeal to lack of authority” — You have no reputation and therefore your evidence is worthless and your logic worthless.
    “What’s your problem” — you must have a personal grudge against (Scheme leader) to say bad things about his company
    fairness fallacy — you’re not being fair! You are biased! I demand you to present facts FAVORABLE to (scheme)!
    Pick some other fallacy from fallacyfiles.org

    Sentence 3: Pick one of the following:

    So go ahead and bash, I’ll be laughing from the bank
    You’re just negative
    Why don’t you just leave us alone

    ^^THIS!!
    There is nothing else that needs to be said after OP's post and this response
    **puts on sunglasses, exits stage left like a boss** :glasses:
  • ChristinaR720
    ChristinaR720 Posts: 1,186
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    Sing it!
  • jacz83
    jacz83 Posts: 19 Member
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    I really appreciate this post! Just because something is easy doesn't mean it's the best. Keep on keepin' on! :bigsmile: :wink: :flowerforyou:
  • dolphinie13
    dolphinie13 Posts: 50 Member
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    Thank you for articulating this so eloquently.
  • bababangarangrang
    bababangarangrang Posts: 23 Member
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    Wonderful post!
  • Trilby16
    Trilby16 Posts: 707 Member
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    Why?

    Why is it so hard for us to accept the reality of things that are too good to be true or just not good for us?

    We all want the *kitten* guy, the get rich quick scheme, the two day diet, the 5 minute facelift, etc... What is wrong with patience and common sense?

    If that guy's a jerk to EVERY other girl, what makes you think he'll treat you different?

    If THOUSANDS of people have lost money to this scheme, why would you be the millionaire?

    ...

    If it seems too easy, why bother? There are things in life that are going to require hard work. That's it. Bottom line. There's no shortcut to success, no matter what area of life. You want to make money and be successful? Work hard. You want a great relationship? Work hard. You want a great body? WORK HARD.

    This is diet and weight loss related because this maddening desire to be the exception is taking over the fitness world. We have to work hard. We have to give ourselves the effort.

    When people tell you to eat more, they're not trying to be mean or insensitive. It's because they've tried what you're doing, thought what you're thinking, and learned from their mistakes. They're trying to help you. You're not the exception.

    When people tell you to lift weights, they're not trying to bash cardio. It's because they've tried what you're doing, thought what you're thinking, and learned from their mistakes. You're not the exception.

    When people tell you those diet pills, wraps, shakes, supplements and VLCDs don't work, THEY'RE NOT TRYING TO BE MEAN OR INSENSITIVE. IT'S BECAUSE THEY'VE TRIED WHAT YOU'RE DOING, THOUGHT WHAT YOU'RE THINKING, AND LEARNED FROM THEIR MISTAKES. YOU'RE NOT THE EXCEPTION.

    You're not the exception. Treat your body right. You're the rule.

    Yeah, kinda?

    Look, OP, you're 23 years old. Do you know what the metabolism is like of a woman who's 61? I guarantee, you do not! But someday, god willing, you'll get there. Sure, everyone want s to be special and snag that prize, but let's not downplay the real, physical, metabolic differences that come with age, gender, body size, activity level and ability.

    When people tell me to eat more, what should I eat? The same amount of calories that was causing me to slowly gain weight over the past few years? Yeah, that might work! (sarcasm)

    I get where you're coming from, OP, but it's not always about being the exception, sometimes it's about actual differences. One thing the young are good at overlooking is that everyone is NOT like them. It's so irritating when other people don't take your sage advice, isn't it?

    There is a constant drumbeat on MFP of 25 YO men telling EVERYONE how to eat and exercise. Bro-science. THEY DON'T KNOW ME. It's challenging to maintain a healthy weight as a 61 YO woman. The young men have no idea. OP, you are trying to be helpful, and for people similarly situated to yourself, your advice may be fine. Let's leave it at that.

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