I am "what a woman should look like"

Maybe he was trying to compliment her but for your husband to say "i didn't like your *kitten* before" I would think is pretty hurtful. It's nice that he likes you now but there is a nicer way to go about it. Shame on me for being sensitive to the OP's feelings. o_0

I guess I was more focussed on what he actually said rather than "what he might have meant".


When it comes down to it, you lose the weight for yourself, sounds like he will learn to love you nomatter what.

Just wanted to see what people say about the comment my husband gave me. He said "You dont need to lose weight or do anything, you are "what a woman should look like now. Before you were too skinny and I didn't like ur *kitten*" LOL

Anyways, prepreg i was 140lbs and now im 155lbs and working on strength training the the last few months. I have just started in June to really pay close attention to food intake and hitting macros. I think it's so weird that he said its "what a woman should look like" What does that mean? Whatever, I don't care. I just want to be fit and lean and I don't care what he says or thinks EXCEPT I do want him to support me and to not get mad that I can't handle junk food in the house. If junk food is in the house, then i will never reach my fitness/lean goal...

Comments please?

You're making it his burden. Because you don't want junk food, he can't have any? You're going to have to deal with whatever you call "junk food" at some point. It's your burden, I don't see why you're making it his. He can support you while eating what he wants. Set your priorities.

Also this. You can't get upset because he eats what he wants. And you can still be lean and fit and eat some junk food occasionally. But, it's on YOU to control it and learn to deal with it. You can't expect the world to cater to your preferences.

Just wanted to see what people say about the comment my husband gave me. He said "You dont need to lose weight or do anything, you are "what a woman should look like now. Before you were too skinny and I didn't like ur *kitten*" LOL

Anyways, prepreg i was 140lbs and now im 155lbs and working on strength training the the last few months. I have just started in June to really pay close attention to food intake and hitting macros. I think it's so weird that he said its "what a woman should look like" What does that mean? Whatever, I don't care. I just want to be fit and lean and I don't care what he says or thinks EXCEPT I do want him to support me and to not get mad that I can't handle junk food in the house. If junk food is in the house, then i will never reach my fitness/lean goal...

Comments please?

You're making it his burden. Because you don't want junk food, he can't have any? You're going to have to deal with whatever you call "junk food" at some point. It's your burden, I don't see why you're making it his. He can support you while eating what he wants. Set your priorities.

Agreed.

he won't be the first or last guy to put his foot in his mouth while trying to give a compliment. sounds like he likes your recent curves, and if you are struggling to lose weight, he is probably trying to encourage you to stop struggling and like yourself where you are.

however, you have to be happy in your own skin. so thank him for loving you with more curves, and ask him to mentally prepare for the fact that you are going to take off the pregnancy weight. maybe you can do some exercises that will give you a nice, healthy, fit, round bum so at least he can still have that.

Men can be very stupid and try to give compliments which kind of come off as insults. A few years ago I had lost a lot of weight and looked pretty good; we were in a crowded room and when I walked up to my hubby he said "You looked so good, I didn't think it was you." WTF????? Aim to please yourself.

Women can be very stupid and turn anything into an insult. A few seconds ago I read a post where a woman was complimented for looking great in a crowd, and she totally twisted it into some kind of insult. Just because you hear it one way doesn't mean it was meant that way. Don't impose your self confidence issues on other people.

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so they stamp "the ideal woman" out on an assembly line now?

only 1 way a woman should look? SMH

Well honestly it sounds like your husband is an *kitten*- not because he likes how you are now but how he talks like a jerk about how you were. If he were mine I'd tell him to f off!

I totally didn't get a "your husband is an *kitten*" vibe from anything she said. He has an opinion, we all do.

I didn't either. I was reading this, and taking account her stats, and I agree. Of course beauty is personal. I think a woman should have a little "umph" to her.

You guys are right! I should not be trying to make him not eat the chips and junk just because I shouldn't and just because i can't handle having them in the house. I need to control this myselft. Enjoy ur chips hunny!!! I will be in the bedroom freaking out until ur done eating them. I serisouly can't be around chips or junk in my house or i eat them. It's just the way it is.

Why can't you find a way to work them into a healthy and balanced diet with reasonable macros? Do you have to eat the whole bag of chips?

I really think what he was trying to say was don't beat yourself up trying to get down to a magic number or a certain weight. He loves you. If you are 155lbs and he thought you were too skinny at 140lbs but you aren't willing to share pictures, I think he is trying to tell you that maybe you are a little too caught up in an ideal instead of enjoying the body (which he likes very much) that you have already achieved. I do not think he was being an *kitten* at all - quite the opposite.

You guys are right! I should not be trying to make him not eat the chips and junk just because I shouldn't and just because i can't handle having them in the house. I need to control this myselft. Enjoy ur chips hunny!!! I will be in the bedroom freaking out until ur done eating them. I serisouly can't be around chips or junk in my house or i eat them. It's just the way it is.

Whoa there. With all kindness and respect, that is your issue that YOU must deal with, not him. You can't just go "Hey, no more of XYZ Evar because I can't deal" because then you're the a-hole.

so they stamp "the ideal woman" out on an assembly line now?

only 1 way a woman should look? SMH

:flowerforyou: THIS

Just wanted to see what people say about the comment my husband gave me. He said "You dont need to lose weight or do anything, you are "what a woman should look like now. Before you were too skinny and I didn't like ur *kitten*" LOL

Anyways, prepreg i was 140lbs and now im 155lbs and working on strength training the the last few months. I have just started in June to really pay close attention to food intake and hitting macros. I think it's so weird that he said its "what a woman should look like" What does that mean? Whatever, I don't care. I just want to be fit and lean and I don't care what he says or thinks EXCEPT I do want him to support me and to not get mad that I can't handle junk food in the house. If junk food is in the house, then i will never reach my fitness/lean goal...

Comments please?

If my hubby said that I would be ECSTATIC, you hear me? Normally he is extremely vague with his compliments. Keep doing what you're doing. It is obviously working. I kept junk food out of the house for a long time, but it was kind of unfair to my family lol. So I just make sure I have my healthy snacks. I make healthy meals for everyone. We eat a lot of fruit and veggies. I just don't keep large containers of ice cream...

My husband has seen me incredibly obese, incredibly thin, and everywhere in between. I've put on some weight this year. Most of it went to my butt and my chest, much to my husband's delight lol. I started to complain about my weight fluctuations, and he told me "Being with you is like being with a variety of women. I never get bored."

You guys are right! I should not be trying to make him not eat the chips and junk just because I shouldn't and just because i can't handle having them in the house. I need to control this myselft. Enjoy ur chips hunny!!! I will be in the bedroom freaking out until ur done eating them. I serisouly can't be around chips or junk in my house or i eat them. It's just the way it is.

Why can't you find a way to work them into a healthy and balanced diet with reasonable macros? Do you have to eat the whole bag of chips?

YES! All or nothing!

Me too! *high five* lol

You guys are right! I should not be trying to make him not eat the chips and junk just because I shouldn't and just because i can't handle having them in the house. I need to control this myselft. Enjoy ur chips hunny!!! I will be in the bedroom freaking out until ur done eating them. I serisouly can't be around chips or junk in my house or i eat them. It's just the way it is.

Why can't you find a way to work them into a healthy and balanced diet with reasonable macros? Do you have to eat the whole bag of chips?

YES! All or nothing!

Then that's your problem. Not your husband or some compliment you turned into an insult... it's ultimately your self control. Self control is probably the single greatest determining factor in dietary success.