DID YOUR MOTHER MAKE YOU OVERWEIGHT?

I became overweight as a child, and while I can't blame my parents entirely for my weight gain, I do think they were one of many factors. They grew up outside of the US in a poor area where portions were small and everything was cooked at home. They didn't gain weight until they immigrated here. The cheapest and quickest foods here are also the least healthy, so that's what we usually ate, and whenever I asked for larger portions I wasn't denied them. In school, and at home, I wasn't taught about proper nutrition and how to recognize when I was full.

My parents were responsible for my childhood fatness, yes. It was just all born out of complete ignorance.

I grew up during the 80's, the height of the "low fat" craze and the mega boom of processed food stuff. So much processed food, and it was all "normal". My mother was always on some low fat diet, complete with tons of processed foods. We were fed all the usual, typical SAD foods; white bread, snack pack chips for kids, processed luncheon meats, low quality "cheese", sugary "juice" and soda, canned veggies, margarine, insta-meals like Hamburger Helper, quasi-meat, etc. Those were our typical staples. My mother did not allow us to have a lot of sugary sweets, but didn't realize things like the typical, kids oriented breakfast cereal, huggie "juice", and over processed white bread is basically nothing but candy. Sweets were "treats", and usually given to us by our dad. We did eat fruit, but the "normal kinds" ; apples, oranges, peaches, and plums. We weren't the most active kids, but we also did play a lot, and still all three of us ended up fat. It was the food; poor quality and it turns out just horrendous for every person in my immediate family.

Even after my mother went to a nutritionist for help, she was prescribed the typical "low fat/high carb" weight loss plan for her family. Eat less fat, give them more starch. Did nothing to help her, or us, shed weight. I imagine that was frustrating for her as she followed the recommendations given by doctors.

I killed my own obesity in my late teens and early 20's by eating less and then eventually realizing that processed foods, sugars, and high carbohydrate intake is detrimental for me. I took my own responsibility and made my own choices, choices that often flew in the face of how I was raised. Every point I lost, and gained, as an adult was my own doing. My parents were not to blame at that point whatsoever because I did educate my own self about what did, and did not, work for me.

I can track many of my bad habits to childhood, and more to teenage hood. However, I have only recently started looking into proper nutrition and healthy lifestyles; that's on me. I've had the internet at my fingers all my adult life; why I didn't use it to research before is entirely on me.

Yes, I grew up on hamburger helper and yes I snuck food into my room whenever possible as my family increased in numbers but the food on the dinner table didn't increase so much. I had a hidey hole under the bottom drawer of my desk in my room. One of my most shameful food memories is of borrowing the toaster and a stick of margarine from the kitchen and eating half a loaf of Wonderbread in my room.

When I got a job I would buy and consume as much cheap food as I could because I was always hungry. I never joined teams at school, though I look at myself now and then and I had a ton of potential; working after school and getting/spending money was too important to me. That was on me, too; I could have rearranged my schedule, my boss worked with the other teens.

I encourage my kids to eat when they are hungry, even between meals. I try to buy healthier options and help guide them into choosing a healthier option between meals. If they've eaten a reasonable amount, but not cleaned their plates, that's OK with me. I had two aunts who were quite peeved if we didn't clean our plates; that one never affected me, but I can see how it would. I can definitely see how both nature and nurture can affect obesity and health in a person's life.

She may have made me overweight as a child, and laid the groundwork for my adult size, but at my age there's no one to blame but myself. I should know better by now.

My mom followed a typical 70's "diet" of Diet Pepsi and cigarettes before my brother and I were born. After that, she put on quite a bit of weight. My mom's a smart lady. I know she knows how to be healthy. But, she has an emotional relationship with food that she definitely passed on to me.

When we were younger, and even to this day, the way my mom shows that she loves us is through food. She generally made very healthy meals for us - we always ate 3 squares, always had fruits and vegetables, etc - but the way she "treated" us was through fast food and restaurant meals and other unhealthy snacks. The more the better. If my dad went out of town, the way she bonded with us was by taking us to Taco Bell (which my dad refused to eat). Baking cookies, whatever you can think of. It was like that was the only way she knew how to communicate that she loved us was by treating us to foods we loved. It taught me to turn to those same foods when I was otherwise feeling unloved, even into my adult life.

Now, I have a twofold struggle. First, to repair my own relationship with food - to learn to treat it as nourishment, as a way to celebrate life and relationships with friends and family, but NOT as a way to cope of feel better - and second to make sure I don't pass down these same habits to my kids. While I also generally feed them quite healthily, I've caught myself considering, for example, taking them to McDonald's for fries or something just because I'm alone with them and I want to bond and I want them to be happy, and I see myself doing the SAME things that my mom did that lead me to this place. I do it occasionally but more often than not I have to stop myself and think of something better to do.

For me, the answer is no. Yes she took me out to eat at fast food about once a week. Yes there was always junk food in the house and a lot of it. Yet at the same time, I still found myself reaching for fruits, lean meats, and veggies more often then junk food. I'm not saying I didn't eat junk food, I did, just not as often as my mom and brother. I was also very active and even signed up for a weight training class during high school. I grew up thin.

My mom decided to move to Australia shortly after I graduated, so I moved in with my boyfriend at the time (now my husband). All he would drink was Mountain Dew and eventually I started doing the same. We spent more money on Mountain Dew than we did on food. There were days I'd eat maybe 1 or 2 meals, but I was drinking almost a full 24 case of Mountain Dew. 12 cans of Mountain Dew is about 2040 calories. So I was drinking at least 2040 calories, sitting on my ***, and eating very little. I could blame my husband, but it isn't his fault that I picked up on his bad habit. I have no one to blame but myself. I still drink Mountain Dew (regular not diet) on occasion when we go out, but over all I have opted for water, tea's, and diet sodas. My husband just recently started counting calories with me and has decided to my surprise to cut back on his Mountain Dew intake as well.

I look a few bad habits from my family life (I don't blame my parents, just the situation). Like eating treats for fear of getting spoiled or taken (the open lolly bags in the cupboard, the ice cream, the doughnuts, etc all had to be eaten right away). Now that all the children have grown up it's not so bad, but I have often ate large amounts of food just because I had this fear of wasting it.

I wouldn't completely put the blame on my mom. She cooked well and made enough for two families. She grew up in a family of 9, so I guess she was used to seeing a big pot of food. My mom did bring in junk food but I would say that it was because she never had it and wanted to give her kids some sweets. I do remember in middle school she would tell me to lose weight, but it was only til my dad's parents were diagnosed with diabetes.

My husband jokingly blames my mom for making him gain weight when we used to live close to them..but I have to remind him that she didn't pin him down and shove food down his throat.

Genetics-wise, I get my dad's blood work and my mom's size. On my mom's side of the family, slim is how you describe in-laws and people who got surgery. You can diet some of it down, but mostly it's a decision of what you want your size to be made of.

Lifestyle-wise, it was pretty much a free for all growing up. I learned to cook at an age that would probably make a few of the moms on here shudder. The only class I could've taken that went over nutrition in depth was child care, but that wasn't until high school and I likely would've been the token male of the classroom. So with nothing but one example of what doesn't work from my mom, I became able to make a Thanksgiving turkey and yet nearly helpless when it came to portioning.

Nope, she didn't make me overweight. She didn't do much of anything.

As a child, you are not capable of making your own food decisions. So, if you are overweight as a child it is your parent's fault. They overfed you, plain and simple.

However, once you are allowed your own food choices, genetics aside, everyone's capable of being at a healthy weight. I don't care if your whole family exercises and weighs 400 pounds.. if that's your healthy set point, and your bloodwork looks good, then YES that is your healthy and natural weight.

Coming from a Native Hawaiian family, where our set point is usually 180 pounds for females and 230 pounds for males, I'm struggling to keep a 150 pound frame on. I put on weight like insanity.
Once you make your own choices, you have to be conscious of what the healthy one is, and WANT to make that healthy choice.

my dad usually made my meals and honestly, they were probably suitable for a baby cow. the amount of food he'd buy and make is ridiculous, and i'd feel bad if i didn't eat all of what was in front of me. so naturally, i had a huge appetite and stomach and honestly it didn't hit me until high school, where i stopped growing horizontally (5'11 now lol) and it impacted my body vertically. the amount of sweets and junk my family used to buy also stemmed my weight gain tremendously and gave me that super sweet tooth.