Obese but still see yourself thin?



  • greenmm25
    greenmm25 Posts: 175 Member
    I've always done the whole I am not that bad, or that big until I see a picture of myself. I still feel like I should only weigh like 180 (over weight but not this big) but the scale says over 200 and that just doesn't match.
  • jezy_jass
    jezy_jass Posts: 328 Member
    I still do from time to time. I'll put on an outfit to go out in and think it looks great, but then when I see pictures from that day/night with that same outfit on it is NOT pretty. Doesn't happen all the time, just every now and again. Not sure if that means I am still in semi-denial?
  • I am completely the same. I started using MFP a long time ago and lost lots of weight then became more sporadic. Not long after I got depressed and gained lots of weight. I didn't notice and continued wearing my 'skinny clothes' until I saw some photos and couldn't believe how big i'd gotten! Today is my first day back on and I'm more determined than ever to lose the extra weight! I need to lose around 40 or 50lbs so I can get back into my skinny clothes (which I have packed into a suitcase and put in the loft)! It's great to see how supportive everyone is though and how well everyone has done with their weight loss it really gives me hope :)
  • Yes! This is what I have been thinking! I was the tall skinny girl who lifted weights until I was 25. Then, I married an obese man who constantly struggles with his weight. Add on kids and a stressful job, then major depression and WHAM! who is that girl? yesterday I went through my pictures and realized that I haven't taken a full body shot in over 4 years! (Or maybe only a few) I can see the pounds add on. Now I am taking pictures to record those pounds coming off.

    My mom always thought she was fat when I was growing up (5'6" and 125)<eye roll>. I wonder if that affects the way I perceive myself?
  • ethompso0105
    ethompso0105 Posts: 418 Member
    I really needed to see this today...I'm glad I'm not alone in this!

    You so often read about people who think they're fat when they're really skinny...I felt so strange (and almost conceited) feeling the opposite way. I can't even begin to describe the shame I feel when I look at myself in a full-length mirror or see a picture of myself.

    Once, for a dance rehearsal for a show I was in, I wore a pair of leggings and a longer shirt with my dance shoes. I felt soooooo good about my outfit and loved how I felt. In my mind, I looked like a curvy dancer. Then the pictures came out and I saw rolls where I didn't realize I had some. So depressing. Hopefully my body will catch up with my mind someday!
  • EyeOTS
    EyeOTS Posts: 362 Member
    This was totally me.
    I was in major denial that I was ever 295 pounds. I always visualized I was more like 250. That made it harder to see early weight loss as a success (because the total was still over what I thought it should be).
  • SrJoben
    SrJoben Posts: 484 Member
    I've never been obese. But I do have a few pounds of fat to lose.

    I still thought of myself as thin somehow even when I had to go up a size or two in pants.
    I still thought of myself as strong even as lack of activity whittled away at my muscles.
    (Health problems and trying to start my own business took all my attention for several years)

    One visit my doctor just said point blank something along the lines of 'You're overweight.'
    I was startled. I said surely around 200 pounds isn't too bad for a six foot tall man.
    She said 'It is for your activity level.'

    That was a wakeup call. I used to really wonder how obese people let themselves get like that. I'm still a little amazed it gets as far as it does for many people. But I guess I understand how it works now. Your attention is elsewhere, your self image isn't updating.
  • ChiefWaha
    ChiefWaha Posts: 2
    I've never had a skinny self, even before I started grade school, so I never really see myself that way. I was always the biggest guy in the room. Now that I've lost some of my extra weight, my hardest part to realize is I'm not the fattest guy in the room anymore. It still startles me every time I realize it.
  • venturaroo
    venturaroo Posts: 84 Member
    I honestly have no concept of what I looked like at my heaviest and I spend a lot of time now confronting the mirror. I make my daughter stand next to me so I can see the difference (not that I will ever be her size 2). I often think I look thinner than I am but want to be real with myself so I don't get complacent and stop working on losing more (habit with me). And yes when I did lose weight before I passed many a mirror and would not know the person looking back at me. This journey is a huge mental process.
  • sevsmom
    sevsmom Posts: 1,173 Member
    My sister is obese. At my worst, I've been mildly overweight. I remember the day when she looked at me with tears in her eyes and said, 'I don't know what you see when you look in the mirror, but when I look in the mirror...I see you.'

    Now, we don't look alike. She's brunette, I have ashe "blonde" hair. She's shorter than I am. We don't look like sisters until you stand by us having a conversation...our mannerisms and way we speak are very similar.

    She was refering to the fact that she does not see an overweight woman when she looked in the mirror.

    We are about 20 years older now, but I remember that clear as day. She's even heavier now, and I always hope that she'll make lifestyle changes before her weight catches up with her. I know it's an emotional drain on her already.
  • lynnerack
    lynnerack Posts: 158 Member
    My daughter had anorexia in her twenties and now thankfully has recovered although still very slim. She looks in the mirror and sees a fat person - body dysmorphia I think is what they call it. Me, on the other hand, has reverse body dysmorphia. I really didn't see the fatter person that I'd become, not until I saw photos of myself.

    I am now enjoying seeing the return of my collar bones when I look in the mirror and also fitting into UK size 14 jeans for the first time in at least 16 years!
  • nwg74
    nwg74 Posts: 360 Member
    I was 373 pounds and I didn't look like it. It was a massive shock when I went on the scales for the first time in years. I basically put weight on slowly over 27 years from my early teens or so so I didn't notice. There was big signs all the time but I didn't see them.

    Even after losing 200 pounds, I still see myself big purely because I still have a stomach. It is slowly getting smaller but is taking a long time. It doesn't help that I have lost no weight in 4 months. I don't think I will be totally happy unless that goes. Excess skin doesn't help.
  • chelseascounter
    chelseascounter Posts: 1,283 Member
    I've always been skinny all my life then gained 20+ lbs. I still saw my skinny self in the mirror. When I took pictures I saw my heavier self but even then I was still a little in denial. That's how I kept on gaining weight: denial. Then one day I tried on a pair of shorts that were once too big/loose on me and now I couldn't even zip them up and was spilling out them! That was a wakeup call.
  • Sooze_1975
    Sooze_1975 Posts: 89 Member
    I have a very similar issue. I see myself as much more physically fit then my reflection shows. I've been going to the gym for about a year now. When I started, I literally couldn't do 5 minutes on the elliptical. Now, I can do 60 min no problem on level 19. Plus, I'm now deadlifting 165 lbs! Super proud of myself for the improvements in physical fitness, however, when I see myself in a picture or in the mirror, what I'm seeing doesn't match the level of physical fitness I feel like I have achieved. I feel like my body doesn't match how good I feel on the inside. I'm working on that tho and know that I'll get there there :-)
  • angash1966
    angash1966 Posts: 19 Member
    well i have been using fitnesspal since the end of may. i have lost 17lbs. so far. my exercise plan that i do everyday is the wii fit for thirty minutes and then a brisk thirty minute walk.i also drink 48 ounces of a detox water that consist of half a cucumber and a whole lemon sliced with mint leaves and put in the refrigerature in the morning before i begin my exercise then i drink it during the day.
  • Cheeky_0102
    Cheeky_0102 Posts: 408 Member
    the last time i was 160 lbs, i was brimming with confidence, this time i don't see myself as at my goal at all! I'm thinking of a tummy tuck and when i look at what wouldn't be fixed i think i need to get rid of more fat first!
    I don't have any naked pictures of myself from back then, so i have no idea whether my body image back then was distorted, or if it's distorted now.
  • Patriots96
    Patriots96 Posts: 96 Member
    I have lost about 25 so far (15 prior to joining mfp) and I have trouble seeing myself as smaller. I still look at plus size clothes and then remember that is not my size anymore. I have fought the weight battle my whole life, even became an anorexic in high school and even then did not see myself as thin. I was teased as a kid for being fat and I have not forgotten that. It is hard to see yourself as thin when most of your life you have not been thin. It is a mental challenge. As it took time to learn that behavior, it will take time to change it. But it all starts with a step in the right direction. I forgot who said it, but it is true that a journey of 1000 miles begins with a single step. Hang in there! And feel free to add me as a friend! :flowerforyou:
  • VincitQuiSeVincit
    VincitQuiSeVincit Posts: 285 Member
    Me! When I first started I didn't see myself as big as I was, until I saw a certain picture and didn't even recognize myself. Now that I have lost a lot of weight, I look at myself and see myself as a lot bigger than I am. Current pictures of me, don't match what I see in the mirror. It's a constant struggle. I guess my mind will catch up eventually.

    When I was HUGE (250 lb at 5'3") I didnt see it... I knew I was in plus sizes, but I didnt "get it"... When I got down to regular sizes, I thought I was a skinny minnie. Now that Ive maintained a size 12-14 for a few years (hovering around 200 lbs), I am starting to see the truth of the matter, and that's that it's still far too much for my frame. I NEED to see awful candid pics in order for it to click, otherwise I think I'm "fine"
  • mkcongrove1
    mkcongrove1 Posts: 81 Member
    Wow, I never realized there would be so many others like me! And I honestly think the best part is that there are so many of you who commented saying you've lost 50+lbs. It's inspiring! My old MFP picture use to be my before (when I was thin) and my after (now) and it wasn't until I put those pictures side by side that I realized I am NOT that skinny girl.
  • C12254
    C12254 Posts: 198
    I dont see myself as "skinny" but surely not as fat as i actually am. guess thats why i always avoid mirrors or any such thing that will show my reflection.