I need some advice about my mum

I would say : absolutely nothing you can do. She's an adult , she makes her choices, if she can get type II diabetes and that doesn't serve as a wake up call you certainly aren't going to get her to change.
My father (now 83) has Type II also, likewise I tried to advise him on diet etc it just didn't work, pretty much food was his only entertainment. He just took the pill and left it at that. If its any consolation he is now 83 and hasn't suffered any serious consequences of diabetes, (although he has other obesity related issues causing him grief).
Try not to worry and as I say my father turned 83 today and is showing no signs of leaving this world so it may not mean a short life span for her if its being managed by the doctors well.

The best advice my mom has ever given me is "You can't help change someone if they dont wan't to help themselves", and that's because my dad is schizophrenic, and he doesn't want to take his meds, so I've learned to accept that. It is hard my mother is very out of shape, and is always getting down on herself she tried working out for over a year and didn't see much results so I told her I will stop putting myself down if she does, and she's been doing a little bit better. I think in a way sometimes if you trick her or challenge her that might help, my mother and I are very stubborn and like a challenge so that's how i was able to help her.

Probably not what you want to hear, but back off the nagging for a while. Some people can change on a dime, and some people just don't (even when faced with death/serious illness). It's damned hard to watch someone you care about hurt themselves, but sometimes you've gotta do just that. Nagging doesn't help. It can drive people into a corner and flat-out refuse, even if it means dying. How would you feel if for the last 10 years, your mum/BFF/SO nagged you on a daily bases about something?

My mom got diabetes when she was 60. She spent a lot more time with me because I was her only child that didn't nag her about eating dessert once in a while.

Nothing. Sadly people have to come to their own decisions about things and do them for their own reasons.
My father has just been diagnosed with stage 4 cancer in his liver & stomach... do you think he quit smoking? No. I am disgusted with him but I have said my piece and now I will let it be. Why? I dont want the time I spend with him to be angsty, unhappy and stressed about something he has no desire to change.
That being said if you mother is giving you a hard time about the great things you doing I WOULD tell her to shut her mouth. I would tell her she is in no position to give any sort of negative feedback and to stick her unhelpful bullying.
Maybe a bit blunt but there you go.

your mother is fortunate to have a daughter who cares so much. I have a mother and father who are diabetic - at 58 my dad had an amputation as a result of poor circulation and diabetes. Yet both of my parents, especially my mom are junk food junkies who drive to the mailbox which is a two minute walk from their front door.

My mother never stops complaining about how bad she feels and when I remind her that she is control of her wellness I am seen as cold and critical. I have tried everything from soothing coaching to tough love, nothing works. You should know that I am a nurse .Both of my parents progressed from pills to insulin injections, they both take 2 a day, sometimes more.

I was raised in a sedentary household and have been overweight all of my life. As I got older I started blaming stress and overwork on poor eating habits and chronic fatigue. I would take control at intervals and would soon see positive benefits, but I would always slip back into my old ways. Recently I was diagnosed with diabetes (all the kids in my family are diabetic ). My doctor has given me a few months to get my health in order as I promised him I could do it without medication. The repeat lab tests will determine if I will be on medication probably for the rest of my life or not. This was a real eye opener for me and I made the decision before I left the doctors office that only I could control my destiny.

I advised my family and asked for their support; my mother however has actually worsened her eating habits and is continually offering this junk to me. each time I tell her "mom you know I am diabetic now and I can't have that" her reply is " well I'm diabetic too, its not going to kill me". I get so frustrated.... Its been hard but I am not getting back into that. It has taken me a long time but I have discovered that only I can be responsible for myself and as a result I am learning that means the same for my mother. I am trying to be there when she needs me, not judge her when I disagree with how she is managing her health and learn from what I think are her mistakes.

I also have children, so your story hits very close to my heart and will help me more than you know. The best advice I can give you, if you want it is: look after yourself, do what you know is right for YOUR health, try not to be too hard on your mother ( I know it will be really challenging) and share your written post and the comments you get with your mother. Then let her make her decisions knowing you did the best you could.

Wishing you all the best!

Warning: a very long rant time!

I posted this on my MFP page the other day, and received some kind words and support, but thought I'd post it on the boards just to get some more feedback and advice. Really not sure if this the right place to be honest, but here goes nothing!

It's about my mum. She was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes 10 years ago and ever since then she hasn't made any improvements within herself to put it in remission. She just depends on the tablets (she takes about 6 a day), would not see a dietician or nutrionist, doesn't follow a healthy diet and never, ever works out, even though she's just joined the gym about a month ago. Getting her to join the gym took a lot of energy out of me persuading her, and it was only when her colleague suggested it afterwards that she joined. For the past three weeks, her sugar levels have been spiking up to a really dangerous number - close to coma levels - and her energy's just gone. She's so weak and all she does is take the tablets and sleep. Her doctor's given her this week off sick and she's on holiday next week, but she's done absolutely nothing at home. She can't eat and when she does, it's only junk food (and after that she puts even more tablets in her body).

I try so hard to tell her to eat more fruit and vegetables and healthier stuff, move a lot more - even if it's walking to the town centre and back (which is about a 5min walk, at most) - and to stop believing that the tablets are the only things that will help her without her effort, but she doesn't listen to me. She makes fun of me for working out and trying to make myself better, but I don't wanna be diabetic! My grandma (her mum) is diabetic too and she's in a wheelchair, and no amount of physical therapy will get her to move (she's in a home in Mauritius, so yeah, can't see her often).

I'm so fed up of seeing my mum like this - it's really irritating. The other day she was on the phone to my auntie and said that if God's given her this illness, then she has to accept to live with it. Roar! I'm at my wits end about this!

What do I do about my mum??

Any advice would be greatly appreciated

Perhaps she's so discouraged and depressed that she's lost hope and doesn't see any point in trying...Or doesn't know where to start.

It is difficult for you from the outside looking in, but she may be choosing to interprete your concern as nagging (and therefore easy to ignore). I'd probably perhaps have one last conversation saying why you are 'bothering' her so much - you love her and want her to be well and healthy and you don't want to lose her. And it is possible for her to fight to get better and not accept this. Many type 2 diabetics will be cured simply by losing weight.

Another thought is that, from what you're describing over the last three weeks, she might be unwell. I assume she's seen the GP for an appointment and check-up? Sadly diabetic patients are at high risk of all kinds of things that may not manifest overtly - from urinary tract infections to silent heart attacks. I'm sorry if I'm scaremongering but it might not just all be due to her lack of motivation.

I think it is all about how weak she feels. Going to the gym can be too much to handle. When I started my new way of living I started with little steps one by one.
Walking is an optimal thing, because you can rest and helps to "step out" a little. I did fitness workouts that were shorter - about 20 minutes. Even thinking of a 40 minutes workout seemed too much to me. 20 minutes or less was something I thought maybe I can handle. I felt "safer" at home.
Befit has plenty of workout videos with different goals and intensities, worth checking: http://www.youtube.com/channel/UCD0nBMLdq_KbIK9u-mzpNkA

I think, the most challenging is starting. Starting small worked for me, and helped me to became stronger and more confident.:) I hope this helps.

Is your mother very devout? Is there someone in your Mosque who could help her to see that God would want her to take care of her body? Might that be a way to help her out of this?

I would say : absolutely nothing you can do. She's an adult , she makes her choices, if she can get type II diabetes and that doesn't serve as a wake up call you certainly aren't going to get her to change.
My father (now 83) has Type II also, likewise I tried to advise him on diet etc it just didn't work, pretty much food was his only entertainment. He just took the pill and left it at that. If its any consolation he is now 83 and hasn't suffered any serious consequences of diabetes, (although he has other obesity related issues causing him grief).
Try not to worry and as I say my father turned 83 today and is showing no signs of leaving this world so it may not mean a short life span for her if its being managed by the doctors well.

How old is your dad?

I'm being a brat, sorry!