Quit feeling sorry for yourself

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Ademar111
Ademar111 Posts: 66 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
I try to be as supportive to individuals as I can because I have struggled in the past, but when people post things like "OMG I went over my cal goal again"; well of course you did you had 3 ice cream bars. We all have gotten ourselves where we are today by eating unhealthy, so quit feeling sorry for yourself and get your butt to work. You are brining down other people with your negativitly due to a lack of commitment (in most cases, not all). No one said everything is going to taste like chocolate covered strawberrys; suck it up and in 6 months to a year you can eat what you want in moderation.

The individuals I am speaking of are the ones that continue to post how dispointed they are and they just want to quit everday because it is too hard. No one said it would be easy, only that it would be worth it!
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Replies

  • Lyerin
    Lyerin Posts: 818 Member
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    But my water glass is empty and the kitchen is REALLY FAR.
  • ami5000psu
    ami5000psu Posts: 391 Member
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    suck it up and in 6 months to a year you can eat what you want in moderation.

    Or you can just do that now.
  • quirkytizzy
    quirkytizzy Posts: 4,052 Member
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    Rar.

    This style of support works well for a lot of people. It doesn't work well for me. This is why it's important to cultivate a friend's list that supports you in the way you find most inspiring.

    I do have a few friends who tell me "Not bad, could be better" and that works for me. Gets my mind into the game of "What small changes could I make TODAY that will be better for TOMORROW?" Overall, though, being told to suck it up does nothing but make go "Well, fine - **** you then, I'll do what **I** want."

    That said, lots of people do well with the whole tough-love thing. DIfferent strokes for different folks.
  • firstsip
    firstsip Posts: 8,399 Member
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    YOU CAN'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO.
  • tworthen79
    tworthen79 Posts: 1,173 Member
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    In some cases it isn't that easy. Many of us here struggle with our emotions, and so we eat. And fixing our mental issues are far harder then changing the number on the scale.
  • plantgrrl
    plantgrrl Posts: 436 Member
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    "brining" down, eh? Are you giving a class on pickling? Let me get my pencil...
  • Ademar111
    Ademar111 Posts: 66 Member
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    suck it up and in 6 months to a year you can eat what you want in moderation.

    Or you can just do that now.

    Very True! The individuals I am speaking of are the ones that continue to post how dispointed they are and they just want to quit everday because it is too hard.
  • Ademar111
    Ademar111 Posts: 66 Member
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    In some cases it isn't that easy. Many of us here struggle with our emotions, and so we eat. And fixing our mental issues are far harder then changing the number on the scale.

    I also struggle, but I would not bring others down with me.
  • crazybookworm
    crazybookworm Posts: 779 Member
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    I get what your saying, but everyone is dealing with their own issue with weight loss. Like someone else said above, there are some people that are struggling with issues that result in them turning to food for comfort. That needs to get corrected first before they can be successful.

    Also, when it comes to food, you don't have to give up something until a person reaches their goal. You can moderate what you eat now.

    It's all about a person finding a program that works best for THEM. Everyone is different. One way of weight loss may not be right or work for another person.
  • Terryj20
    Terryj20 Posts: 33
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    Well said Tworthen79!!!!
  • plantgrrl
    plantgrrl Posts: 436 Member
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    In some cases it isn't that easy. Many of us here struggle with our emotions, and so we eat. And fixing our mental issues are far harder then changing the number on the scale.

    Truth. Some of us might have issued because we were being told to "suck it up" all the time--literally or figuratively. A lot of us self medicate with food, without realizing it. Sometimes we don't want to feel alone in our journey. Sorry to "brine" your curve. You and your pissy friends can go off in a self-congratulatory corner and talk about how you're all so much more committed then the rest of us--with your Yoda quotes. "Do or do not. There is no try."
  • Doone33
    Doone33 Posts: 171 Member
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    In some cases it isn't that easy. Many of us here struggle with our emotions, and so we eat. And fixing our mental issues are far harder then changing the number on the scale.

    I believe when people have a emotional eating disorder.. of any kind.... I do not believe others really understand... sometimes its hard to understand... Cancer eats us, Aids eats, Tumors change more than just some pounds..... But emotional issues are hidden often and cant be seen or are not discussed with the public (if they are noticing them.. time to seek some outside assistance!) So often it is so very hard for those who don't have that struggle in their life to understand the journey to just overcome that... let alone the eating habits and then loosing the weight! But he is right.... It may not be as easy as some others.. but everyone can do despite your personal battles! JS
  • gogojodee
    gogojodee Posts: 1,261 Member
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    Rar.

    This style of support works well for a lot of people. It doesn't work well for me. This is why it's important to cultivate a friend's list that supports you in the way you find most inspiring.

    I do have a few friends who tell me "Not bad, could be better" and that works for me. Gets my mind into the game of "What small changes could I make TODAY that will be better for TOMORROW?" Overall, though, being told to suck it up does nothing but make go "Well, fine - **** you then, I'll do what **I** want."

    That said, lots of people do well with the whole tough-love thing. DIfferent strokes for different folks.

    Well said! :flowerforyou: wanna be friendsies? :)
  • FrankiesSaysRelax
    FrankiesSaysRelax Posts: 403 Member
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    I don't think I understand.. how is anyone bringing others down by their failure to eat well? You do realize that many people here have an unhealthy relationship with food, correct? It isn't that easy to just "suck it up."

    There is a very unhealthy mentality around dieting, however. People try to restrict so much that they end up bingeing and consuming the 3 ice cream bars you're talking about. Moderation is key here. I think everyone needs support and to realize that one or two bad days isn't going to derail all your efforts. There are definitely people who aren't trying very hard, but the majority are working and need guidance, motivation and advice. You won't help anyone by telling them to suck it up.
  • MoreBean13
    MoreBean13 Posts: 8,701 Member
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    Did you consider just saying this to the people who you want the message to go to rather than putting your friends on blast in a public forum?


    ETA: ohhh wait.. Nvm...its not your friends that you're trying to help, its all of MFP you're trying to boss around. Got it.
  • nomeejerome
    nomeejerome Posts: 2,616 Member
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    Oh goodness. This might not end well.
  • Crochetluvr
    Crochetluvr Posts: 3,143 Member
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    You have the option to unfriend them.... they probably won't notice.
  • Makajo2013
    Makajo2013 Posts: 8 Member
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    Thank you - I needed that..... I don't feel sorry for myself but am not dedicated yet.
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
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    suck it up and in 6 months to a year you can eat what you want in moderation.

    Or you can just do that now.

    ^^^ this

    you don't need to wait until you're at maintenance to do that, just set your calorie goal to where you're eating the most calories you can while still losing weight steadily. You'll take a little longer to get there, but maintenance will be a lot easier because you'll have already learned how to enjoy all the foods you love in moderation and you never felt deprived so continuing with your new lifestyle will be easy.

    Short term thinking like "six months of torture then I can go back to eating normally" is the main reason why 95% of diets fail in the long term and why people get stuck in cycles of yo-yo dieting.

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