Frustrated, even furious

.

Also all the passive-aggressive rude people on here addressing the poster indirectly and calling her 'insane'. STOP.

Play nice.

Excuse me, but I am going to need to see your internet police badge before I take orders. For my safety as well as yours.

I don't have a badge, but I do have a sexy cop uniform. Does that count?

Also all the passive-aggressive rude people on here addressing the poster indirectly and calling her 'insane'. STOP.

Play nice.

Excuse me, but I am going to need to see your internet police badge before I take orders. For my safety as well as yours.

I don't have a badge, but I do have a sexy cop uniform. Does that count?

Close enough for me! :blushing:

HEY GUYZ!

I AM DOING SOMETHING THAT IS NOT REALLY WORKING FOR ME, BUT I DON'T WANT TO LISTEN TO ANY OF YOUR SUGGESTIONS! CAN YOU PLEASE GIVE ME A WAY TO GET THE RESULTS I WANT BY ONLY DOING IT THE WAY I WANT TO DO IT? THANKS!

I think the best course of action is to have somebody come into your home, feed you your EXACT BMR via a nasal drip so you don't have to contend with the pesky notion of eating adequately, and strap you up with some ab belts, a few muscle-toning pads and put you to sleep on a weight-loss vibration plate.

In 3 weeks, and not a day less or more, you will be an absolute adonis, in perfect health, with full control over your hunger pangs and an unimaginable level of physical strength that would make Batman weep and Superman jealous.

OMG TAKE MY MONEY!!

Recipe entry...calorie counting...heck, tying shoelaces...

Much easier to curse the darkness.

It's probably harder for some than for others, and who knows what would happen if you started logging, or raised calories as some have suggested, but if it were me I would just continue doing what has already been working for you, and resign myself to the fact that yes, it's going to be difficult the whole time. Most things in life that are worth having are hard work. Maintaining my weight is hard for me too, I'm in the same boat as you are where I never eat till I'm totally full and pass up many things that would taste good because if I eat them, I'll probably gain weight. If I have a day where I slip up, usually I'm up 2 lbs the next day (which is usually water weight and goes away pretty quick if I get back on track). Sometimes I wish it were easier, but mostly I welcome the challenge.

You probably nailed it here. Thank you for bringing me back to reality.

So the advice you do want to listen to is "keep doing exactly what you've been doing," even though the vast majority of feedback you've gotten suggests that you need to rethink your approach, and you yourself cannot stand what you're doing after experiencing it only a relatively short time?

The best advice I can give you doesn't have to do anything with diet, exercise, or calorie counting.

I believe you would greatly benefit from openly listening to people's feedback and thoughtfully considering it for a while without immediately arguing why it won't work for you.

Cultivating a little patience would go a long way.

If you can't do that, I think you are going to struggle greatly in achieving and maintaining additional progress, because you are setting some very big and unnecessary obstacles in your own way. It doesn't have to be like this.

I think you hit the nail on the head. I think that's exactly what she wants - a whole slew of responses telling her what she's doing is right. I don't know if it's justification to herself or somebody else, but if she got those responses she wouldn't have to put in the work & could just wonder why nothing works for her.....

OMG TAKE MY MONEY!!

I'm setting up a website as we speak. I'll start you off with a low-low monthly payment of 39.99, and decrease it to 19.99 after a year for loyalty, but only if you buy my branded products.

I have pink sparkly nasal drips that do loop-de-loops like a crazy straw. It makes not eating fun!!

I have pink sparkly nasal drips that do loop-de-loops like a crazy straw. It makes not eating fun!!

But... I like *blue* sparklies! When is somebody going to find me a way that works for *ME*?!

I am just want to be a normal person.
Normal people have their bodies regulated, they eat until they are not hungry anymore, they don't gain any weight and they never log.

I read a lot about the CR method - namely, always eating a little below your level of saturation.
This is something that can be done by listening to your stomach and that does not need daily logging - which for me is incredibly taxing, time-wise.

Caveat: my friends would probably say I'm not a "normal" person, but here's my two cents anyway

When I give my body what it *needs* on a regular basis, most days that's enough food and at least I don't feel hungry. It took some getting used to, but you've been at this long enough to know your body isn't getting used to it. When I log, I eat for nutrition. I do spend a lot of time logging, partly because I'm trying to balance my macros, but partly because I'm trying to get as much food as possible out of my calories. If I eat according to my stomach, I gain weight -- after so many years of emotional eating, my stomach just doesn't seem to have my long-term health in mind

I'm also 5'7" but am only now down to 180 lbs, and my nutritionist still has me at 1750 calories per day (plus eating back exercise calories) with 30% from fat, 20% from protein and 50% from carbs (and I love my carbs, so when I'm emotional, that's hard to stick to!). I'm only losing weight at about 1 pound per week, but over 56 weeks later, I'm very pleased with the results.

I know there are some people who really find it hard to eat more, but if you're hungry all the time, then that should tell you something. It's definitely possible to eat clean, eat more and lose weight from where you're at, but as someone already pointed out, the less you have left to lose, the longer it takes to get there.

This is a great clean eating blog http://www.thegraciouspantry.com/ and I can usually build 500+ calorie meals from her recipes, especially once I add a salad or glass of milk to my meal. Eating more to lose weight takes a leap of faith, but a lot of people on here have done it with success. Have you searched the forums for some of their experiences? I seem to remember there being a thread of success stories at some point.

The point is, what do you want more: eating you can stick with for life to ultimately get you to a weight you're happy with, or to be hungry all the time but skinny? It sounds like that's the decision your frustration has brought you to, and I think once you answer that question truthfully, you'll know what to do next.

If you're so busy you don't have time to tie your shoes, you need to step back and take a look at your priorities. You can keep trying to do everything for everyone, but pretty soon you won't be able to do anything for anyone. Delegate, cut some stuff out temporarily, or rearrange your schedule a little bit. I know what it's like to have yourself spread so thin that you barely have time to sleep. In college, between classes, two jobs, and studying, I set aside time for 1 meal a day and 6 hours max to sleep. It was not an ideal situation. Don't wear yourself down so much that you can't do anything at all. Take care of you for a while!

As for counting calories, that has been the best thing for me. I tried for a while to say that I would stay between 1300-1500 calories and just do quick math in my head. But I wasn't adding in everything, nor was I paying attention to portions. Result? Gaining even more weight and becoming sad that I'd never again wear my skinny pants. I started logging and realized I was eating way more than I thought. I don't get on several times throughout the day to log each thing I eat. I do it early in the morning after my workout, but before I leave for work. It takes me about 5-10 minutes to plan out my whole day of meals and snacks. That way you'll have an idea of what is going on as opposed to just guessing and then wondering why you're not getting results. You can always make changes at the end of the day if necessary.

Others have mentioned, and I agree, using the recipe builder. You have to only put a recipe in one time, and then it'll always be there when you want to use it rather than listing each ingredient individually and calculating how much of that ingredient you're ingesting.

Good luck to you.

also - eating ethnic food is as terrible excuse to not log. I am Indian and i eat a lot of obscure foods that aren't in the database. The thing is, the ingredients ARE. So, you use the recipe builder to construct what you're eating.

Thank you for posting this! I am saving this, because I see it with alarming frequency. Like there's something magical about Indian food as compared to the rest of the world's cuisine. I mean, apart from being extra crazy delicious, of course!:laugh:

Yes. Trini gyal here and I just don't get why Indian food is such a mystery to folks when logging or building recipes

Seriously. Someone post some recipes so we can all at least get something out of this thread. I'm pretty sure we can all agree on anything over some good eats.

Ya got a point there

Well congratulations OP. You managed to get everyone that consistently/constantly argues with each other to actually agree on something and pretty much in the same way. wow!

I DO eat a lot of things that aren't in the database. I did track very briefly on this forum in the beginning and it was not something that I wanted to continue doing. Very time consuming for me.
I am not American born and raised and I cook many recipes learned from my mother and grandmother - many adapted to be low in calories (less fat, salt, never sugar). There will be no such dishes in the database - only approximations - which I can do with my own eye balling.
I also sometimes graze just a little bit throughout the day given that I am restraining myself so much with the portions at meal times. Could be a few almonds, flax crackers or a fruit, or a little taste when I cook, etc;
so trying to track all these little bitty things would drive me up the wall.

I DO eat a lot of things that aren't in the database. I did track very briefly on this forum in the beginning and it was not something that I wanted to continue doing. Very time consuming for me.
I am not American born and raised and I cook many recipes learned from my mother and grandmother - many adapted to be low in calories (less fat, salt, never sugar). There will be no such dishes in the database - only approximations - which I can do with my own eye balling.
I also sometimes graze just a little bit throughout the day given that I am restraining myself so much with the portions at meal times. Could be a few almonds, flax crackers or a fruit, or a little taste when I cook, etc;
so trying to track all these little bitty things would drive me up the wall.

I see where you're coming from with the way your recipes don't appear as 'Ready Meals' in the food database. Like you I am not American and cook almost everything from scratch. I eat a very healthy range of foods in fact but have been overweight for too long. However I would guess that like me you also have a number of meals you eat fairly frequently - and Snacks too. I understand that you don't have a lot of time to enter your meals each day but bear with me just now for a bit because the suggestion a bit further down makes our situation a breeze.... I'm over-worked too so I like to make my time work better for me!

I really know the frustration of being overweight when you're trying to do everything right. I've researched diet and nutrition exhaustively as a result of the same issues - and research is my profession. All the diet research you'll read or schemes you hear about have one major link: the people who succeed at losing weight long-term are the ones that set specific targets and then keep a daily record of what they do. That is the real secret ingredient in every single successful diet plan you encounter, no matter what mix of foods or exercise they tell you to try. Record your habits and be guided by them. But like I said I'm rushed (and a bit lazy!) and just can't be fussed to keep a pen and paper on me or count calories, so please don't judge me too harshly for my 'lazygirl tips' :

When I've cooked a meal and I'm just taking a minute or two after dinner - to digest the food and remind my stomach that YES I am full now like it or not - I go to the 'Recipes' tab and add a new meal (or choose one of my regulars that I've added before). I can find and click on pretty much all the basic ingredients I've used such as Celery, Mince packs (from all the major food stores in the UK too) herbs etc and anything else you might commonly use.

This makes life so easy because you can tell the Recipe wizard how many people at your dinner table ate all these ingredients between them, and it just works out the 'Per Portion' calories etc for you. No maths - just quantities like 3 lots of 1 carrot and half a cup of mushrooms or 9 x 1 thick slice of tomato - it's all on there ready for you in all kinds of measurement options that don't require a weighing scale at all - I never use 'em. So after five minutes' setup time I can just choose 1 Portion from X recipe every single time I need to from then on. 5 minutes while I let my food go down, and I'm done forever.

Similarly, if I often have a handful of raisins, or a Jaffa Cake, with my mid-morning cup of tea, I just 'Remember' the combination from the Add Meals menu and from then on it's literally two clicks to add that forever after. I do that with all kinds of things like sandwiches and salads etc that I'm eating alone., often while I'm actually eating them because it helps me slow down while I'm eating my lunch and helps me decide whether to go with a lighter or heavier option for dinner based on my day so far. Double-bonus.

In terms of managing your hunger: Cinnamon with Chromium Picolinate work wonders and are also fab for preventing Diabetes anyway. But you probably have a bigger health problem brewing if you've been restricting your food intake so drastically for so long and if you carry on that way you will permanently feel hungry all the time **regardless of how much you eat**..... And you'll likely get ill more and more often. And tired and cranky with your family :-)

Use the Food Log to check that the reason you're hungry isn't because the *balance* of food types you're eating aren't leaving you with these cravings - too high Carbs vs Protein or vice-versa, not enough essential Fats etc. - you may be eating absolutely tons of food that still leave you malnourished because you're too low in one specific area and your body is desperately trying to fix that by eating anything in reach even if it won't help. It might actually turn out your restricted intake is missing a fat-soluble vitamin or a micro-nutrient and you're feeling madly starved just for the lack of that little thing - which is why the 'See all Nutrients' list across a week is really revealing, if you actually *log your foods*.

The other trick in a hurry is - when you are hungry, actually sniff different foods rather than just trying your normal comfort option to shut up your stomach. Women commonly do that by instinct when pregnant... It's handy! But there are all kinds of cravings that are weirdly connected to specific nutrients - eating ice is often iron deficiency; craving vinegar might mean you're low on magnesium. Our stomachs just aren't that clever but a bit of olfactory guidance might help if you don't have your nutrient list with you. Low calorie diets like yours tend to create all kinds of deficiencies and therefore food cravings, much like a growing baby does :-) So using your food log and your nose together can help you eat *smarter* to prevent that happening.

On days when I want to save a bit of my calorie balance for a treat, I find high fibre vegetables or pulses will make meals much more filling. Today 3 hours on from dinner I'm still totally stuffed, because I've smuggled a TON of vegetables into my bolognese sauce, my food balance for the day is very close to the guides on the Food Log and I keep tabs on my nutrient list - if I've gone most of a week low on something, I just tailor a meal to fill in the gaps.

I've kept track of my meals so it turns out the veggies worked and I've actually got 500 calories left in my allowance for today so far: No hunger, no cravings at all. I know it's important not to go into starvation mode too often, but at this rate, that cupcake I've promised myself is going to end up a midnight treat! I've earned it though and I'll be eating it for sure :-)

Dieting without recording regularly like this just never really works. I'm serious - eat a pound of this or ten pounds of that every day for x number of days, or only eat this colour food or those types of points, restrict calories today and reward yourself with a binge tomorrow - whatever set of restrictions you find appealing. **It will never make a genuine difference unless you record it every day** ... Though you could create serious health issues along the way. Because we're human and we increasingly guess and get fluffy on details, or lose motivation, or forget to track our successes and learn from them. Or forget to eat a balanced and complete diet and put our whole metabolism into freefall.

That's why I've resorted to MyFitness Pal, because I can complete a daily diary without writing anything down, in a matter of moments, it does all the maths stuff for me and shows me my progress, just like Weight Watchers et al, but without the stupid, pointless, rules and time and intrusion.

Well congratulations OP. You managed to get everyone that consistently/constantly argues with each other to actually agree on something and pretty much in the same way. wow!

Yea. We'll all be thrashing each other again in no time, but for now, group hug! :bigsmile: