is anyone else sort of embarrassed at losing weight?

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JaredFat2Fit
JaredFat2Fit Posts: 9
in Health and Weight Loss
I've almost reached my goal weight, but i want to lose more. But, when people start to comment like "have you lost weight?" or something along those lines, i feel embarrassed. So i usually say no but, in actuality i have. like does anyone feel the same way?? I don't know if its shame or anything but, i feel sort of angry at someone for bringing it up. I don't see any weight loss in the mirror but, other people can and i just wish people didn't say anything to me about it lol
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Replies

  • jjay23
    jjay23 Posts: 160 Member
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    I dont feel like this but I was having this exact conversation with my sister. she hates when people notice and would rather they didnt. it has in the past made her give up her goals. for her she said it felt like they were saying you looked rubbish and fat before now you dont and that was something she didnt like.Of course that isnt what they meant but when you are insecure the last thing you want is people looking at the change you have made in case they are making a judgemnet you dont like.

    Be happy that people notice it means your doing a great job! I am sure they just think wow you look great :)
  • mcibty
    mcibty Posts: 1,252 Member
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    I don't get embarrassed about people commenting about the weight loss, I live for it! It's when they ask me about working out that I go all shy. People at work ask me, "Do you go to the gym a lot?" and I just mumble something, when, in actual fact, I should be like, YES, YES I BLOODY DO!

    I agree with the above, you NEED to hear it, otherwise your brain won't catch up with your body and you could end up going under a healthy weight. Enjoy that they've noticed. A lot of people don't get the comments they rightly deserve!
  • Carmella9
    Carmella9 Posts: 171 Member
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    I think this demonstrates your low self esteem, obviously you have quite little confidence and struggle with taking compliments.
    Next time someone ask's, just say...yes thanks for asking, its as easy as that, and you'll feel great about it :)
  • SJVZEE
    SJVZEE Posts: 451 Member
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    I've almost reached my goal weight, but i want to lose more. But, when people start to comment like "have you lost weight?" or something along those lines, i feel embarrassed. So i usually say no but, in actuality i have. like does anyone feel the same way?? I don't know if its shame or anything but, i feel sort of angry at someone for bringing it up. I don't see any weight loss in the mirror but, other people can and i just wish people didn't say anything to me about it lol

    I was very self conscious when people started noticing-I'd literally have 3-5 people every Sunday at church pull me aside and ask what I was doing/compliment me, and since I'm very shy in real life, it was very overwhelming (I didn't even know half of these people!). I still get compliments and a bit of shocked responses from friends/family I haven't seen in a while, but I've been in maintenance for several months now and I'm more used to my body, so it's not such a big deal anymore.
  • Busymomof003
    Busymomof003 Posts: 44 Member
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    yes, and I think I'm not used to compliments as well. I usually respond with 'I'm working on it!' and move on. I guess I don't like most people to know how much I struggle and obsess about all of this... and how long I wasn't making progress! Although there's a few people I talk 'diet' to regularly- so I would hope they would notice!
  • girlinagirdle
    girlinagirdle Posts: 37 Member
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    People at work ask me, "Do you go to the gym a lot?" and I just mumble something, when, in actual fact, I should be like, YES, YES I BLOODY DO!

    This.

    But maybe that is because I'm English and it goes against my DNA!
  • chandanista
    chandanista Posts: 986 Member
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    Usually I'm quite pleased when people notice; only once recently was I embarrassed. I have some larger sized aunts on my dad's side--not just wide but tall. Throughout the years they've all had some bad health problems that make it difficult to lose weight, and put on meds that make it easy to gain weight. When I attended my cousin's wedding and the aunts started remarking about how great I look, and how hard I must be working, I felt very, very awkward, and yes somewhat embarrassed, because I love those women and know what tough rows they've had to hoe and it didn't seem fair at that moment that I should be able to lose weight so simply and they struggle to maintain.

    I hope to avoid some of that side of the family's health problems, in part through my lifestyle change. My mom's side is naturally thin built and gravitates towards being healthy so I have a chance...
  • MickeyBoo
    MickeyBoo Posts: 196 Member
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    I have experienced that and I think some of it is actually accepting that yes you were that fat to begin with, I always had a large part of me in denial about my actual size so although I couldn't see a big change, when others noticed it made me realise just how big I really must have looked before.

    I also hate the follow up questions, how are you losing it, how much have you lost, what's your secret, how much do you weigh, sometimes rude and it gets annoying being on repeat, "eating well and exercising!"
  • Colorfan
    Colorfan Posts: 230 Member
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    Yeah, I feel a bit embarrassed when people point it out or ask what Ive been doing, etc.

    Its not that I dont want to share, because I do. Its more that Im kind of shy in person and Im also not used to attention. So used to being ignored and left to my own devices.
  • bob_day
    bob_day Posts: 87
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    Once you've reached your goal weight, work on maintaining
    that weight. Then after a year or two, that will be the normal
    you, and people won't comment about it any more.

    I worked very hard for about 10 years to go from overweight
    to a few pounds above underweight. But my weight loss was
    so slow that no one ever noticed my weight loss, and I was
    actually a little disappointed that no one ever commented on it.
  • jimethanowen
    jimethanowen Posts: 50
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    I agree, it's a compliment and may motivate others...embrace it and say, "yes, thank you"!!!
  • RunningSwede
    RunningSwede Posts: 42 Member
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    I just tell ‘em: I’ve been exercising more.
  • beachgod
    beachgod Posts: 567 Member
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    Hell no. It took a lot of effort on my part and I'm proud of my accomplishments and am looking forward to continual improvement because I am far from finished.
  • HerBravado
    HerBravado Posts: 392 Member
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    lmao, I kinda feel good about it. I have people who haven't seen me since high school who're like-- "OMG YOU LOST WEIGHT." & I don't really know what to say, so I just...say yeahh. I like when people notice because it gives me a sense that I'm doing things right & even if I don't see much of a change-- others do.
  • tanyadolan1
    tanyadolan1 Posts: 55 Member
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    You should think of it as a compliment. Some people don't even notice when you have lost weight. Hold your head up high and go...Yes I have lost weight and I am very proud of myself for achieving it.
  • sevsmom
    sevsmom Posts: 1,172 Member
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    It was a bit much when people would refer to me as the shrinking woman. A) I didn't think I looked THAT bad before losing weight and B) I was easily embarassed.

    I've been at this weight for over a year now, and not too many people say much about losing weight. I do still get complimented on how trim I am or if they know about my running, they'll compliment that. I just learned to say, "Thanks! Been working hard at it." And then move along.
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
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    Nope why would I be embarrassed? It takes a lot for me to feel embarrassed.
  • Rozieq84
    Rozieq84 Posts: 38
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    I have this same problem. The things I hate are, "Did you lose weight?" No I just woke up one morning 3 sizes smaller!? OF COURSE I LOST WEIGHT! Another one is, "How much have you lost?" Sorry, my dear, I don't care how much I like you unless I choose to share that information with you, it is none of your damn business. I just can't take that people need to quantify your achievements with a number, as we all know, it's SOO much more than that.

    The other one that I hate is, "How did you do it?"... um, the way anyone who hasn't had medical intervention does, by working REALLY hard, and by watching what I eat & trying to be more active. They never seem to like that answer.

    Hearing that you look great, healthy, or fit is fantastic; those I'll take. I just wish people would realize how stupid they sound when they pose these questions and how obnoxious it is to the people they ask.
  • Doone33
    Doone33 Posts: 171 Member
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    yes, and I think I'm not used to compliments as well. I usually respond with 'I'm working on it!' and move on. I guess I don't like most people to know how much I struggle and obsess about all of this... and how long I wasn't making progress! Although there's a few people I talk 'diet' to regularly- so I would hope they would notice!

    This is a good comment and appropriate! You don't want to say no if it is obvious you have... Just acknowledge them and move on.... I too hate comments.... I have a booty... always have, My cousin came up to me and loudly announced... you lost weight... and your butt is finally getting smaller.... I thought it was rude... and so did my father who was there at the time.... I could not believe she said that and personally... I was upset that she felt like she had the right to think just because she liked being a rectangle box, That I would take her statement as a compliment, because I love having hips and a booty..... makes me feel like a woman!
  • smaihlee
    smaihlee Posts: 171 Member
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    I completely understand this, and for me it all depends on the context of the situation.

    If I'm at work and trying to just do my job and someone I don't really know goes out of their way to stop me and make a comment, I get freaked out and I'm thinking, "CREEPER! HOW DARE YOU LOOK AT ME!!!", and can't get away fast enough.

    On the other hand, if I am going to be in a situation where I want to show off, it goes the complete opposite. Last night I went to a picnic at my son's school and made sure I was put together and wearing newer clothes that fit me properly. Ran into a friend I haven't seen in a while and we talked for probably 30 minutes. Toward the end of the conversation we got on the topic of exercise. She made an off-hand comment to the effect of, "yeah I can tell you've been doing something". To which I just wanted to shake her and say, "I HAVE LOST THIRTY-SEVEN POUNDS AND I AM WORKING MY AZZ OFF!!!!"

    All of this to say, I recognize I have seriously distorted thinking and need to focus on being more humble and appreciative. I'm working on it :)

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