Negative Husband

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13

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  • gogoyubarino
    gogoyubarino Posts: 104 Member
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    You should mention how baldness makes him look older than his x-number of years.
  • happysherri
    happysherri Posts: 1,360 Member
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    My boyfriend told me "you'll never buy a house". (meaning I'm too picky to pick one -kinda true). I bought a house and we are now living happily in it since June!

    Discourage me... I will laugh and do it anyway! Bwahahaha
  • escloflowneCHANGED
    escloflowneCHANGED Posts: 3,038 Member
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    Maybe he's just cheating on you. Or jealous. Or trying to sabotauge you.

    You should be negative back! Like in math, two negatives make a positive!!!!
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
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    wow, insecurity?
  • dwg1010
    dwg1010 Posts: 4 Member
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    Ive lost 50lbs since having a baby in April and my husband has yet to tell me I'm looking better but he will comment on girls FB pics and tell them they are hot =/. I think i'm losing the battle =(
  • Fozzi43
    Fozzi43 Posts: 2,984 Member
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    Take no notice of him.
  • dwg1010
    dwg1010 Posts: 4 Member
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    Sorry guys I'm messing this up. I think i got it now forgive me
  • postrockandcats
    postrockandcats Posts: 1,145 Member
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    Mine can be, but only when he feels he's not making progress. So, perhaps your man is just projecting?
  • aboe3371
    aboe3371 Posts: 2
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    Hi young lady! The question is not about what your husband says, or does. It is the meaning you give them. If you want to truly get to your goal weight and stay there, you must look at the patterns that have gotten you to the place you are right now.
    1- Are the actions of your husband an emotional trigger for food?
    2- When does he make these comments?
    3- How do we interrupt the patterns above?
    Everything we do as humans has patterns. We can control these patterns by learning to recognize them, and then finding strategies to interrupt them.
  • lsorci919
    lsorci919 Posts: 772 Member
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    Ive lost 50lbs since having a baby in April and my husband has yet to tell me I'm looking better but he will comment on girls FB pics and tell them they are hot =/. I think i'm losing the battle =(

    Talk about disrespectful! I would slap the crap out of my husband if he was complementing other women but not me!
  • dchrise
    dchrise Posts: 3 Member
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    I learned a long time ago that if I wanted to lose weight, I was doing it for my OWN well being. If you're not getting the support at home, find people who do support you. Just look at all the great support you receive here!!! Keep going and SHOW him how much this means to you - maybe he'll take the hint.
  • KelGen02
    KelGen02 Posts: 668 Member
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    Ive lost 50lbs since having a baby in April and my husband has yet to tell me I'm looking better but he will comment on girls FB pics and tell them they are hot =/. I think i'm losing the battle =(

    Nice job on your part for loosing the weight, 50lbs is AWESOME! Sound like the weight isn't the only thing you should loose. No offense but that is truly very disrespectful... WOW!!
  • alisonlynn1976
    alisonlynn1976 Posts: 929 Member
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    Quit seeking his approval and just do it. If he continues making negative comments once you stop asking for his opinion, then it's going to be time to reexamine why you're in this relationship.
  • dj0jazzy
    dj0jazzy Posts: 56 Member
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    Maybe he's just jealous. Maybe he wants to do what your doing but feels like he can't. I know it's hard but try not to listen to him because you are doing an amazing job!
  • maybeazure
    maybeazure Posts: 301 Member
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    I looked at your profile to see if you were in your 60's or something. You are 36. You don't have any age related limits. Sheesh. Tell him to go jump in a lake.
  • Escape_Artist
    Escape_Artist Posts: 1,155 Member
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    You don't need him to tell you you can or can't - just do it, then rub your slim and toned tushie in his face like you're Miley Cyrus at the VMAs.

    ^^ This :flowerforyou:
  • l911jnt
    l911jnt Posts: 164 Member
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    My husband is extremeley supportive and is losing a few pounds himself. He loves me big or small and goes out of the way to show it.... but we've been together 18 yrs too.... I found that earlier in our marriage he didn't really like me doing things to make myself look better. I think it intimidated him and he thought I would find someone else to move on to. The way you said he says that to you kind of sounds like that may be his line of thinking. Sometimes they are insecure and take it out on us without really meaning too. This might not be true for you but just a thought. Now he loves me no matter what I do and I am proud of him for striving to do better. Hope it gets better for you.
  • Hexahedra
    Hexahedra Posts: 894 Member
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    The key here is insecurity. If you're insecure everything he says can be viewed in a negative light.

    If he seems enthusiastic and supportive of your new fitness endeavor, you can turn around and say "so you think I'm fat now?"
    If he seems resigned and indifferent because he thinks you're fine today, you can turn around and say "you're so negative".

    It's nice to have cheerleaders, but at the end of the day you alone carry the ball.
  • RunningSwede
    RunningSwede Posts: 42 Member
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    As his comments are impacting how you feel, I might recommend you get it out in the open. Ask him what's his motivation in telling you these demotivating comments. You may want to ask him to explain his concerns/fears regarding your quest for a healthier future. Open the dialogue. See what he as to say and then go from there. Good luck.
  • Tyree985
    Tyree985 Posts: 22 Member
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    Not mine! My husband encourages me to the point where I want to say geez you really act like I'm big as a house! Like most husband's it takes him forever to complete a task that I ask like wash the dishes. Yet when we have to move the exercise equipment from our exercise room to the family room (I like to watch TV while on the treadmill) he does that with no hesitation. He even bought me workout close, that I didn't ask for let me point out, and after 10 years together I can count on one hand the articles of clothing he has bought me. Although I appreciate the encouragement I would prefer if he simply complimented me every so often instead of making me feel like if I stop losing weight he would be disappointed.

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