Have you tried GLP1 medications and found it didn't work for you? We'd like to hear about your experiences, what you tried, why it didn't work and how you're doing now. Click here to tell us your story
Haters - a rant
Replies
-
Time to "just break up" with these "good friends".0
-
Funny, I'm 5'8" and when I got down to 65 kilos (or your 145 pounds) I got told I looked too thin in the face! I now tend to havea goal weight about 5 kilos higher then that, because 65 was the bottom of my range, but only because I thought it would be easier to maintain... Now I gotta get back there again! haha
I don't think they are doing it on purpose - I don't imagine they realise how hurtful it is to be given a "throw-away" comment that isn't very positive when you've tried so hard - and subconciously I think they are jealous so you can definitely feel sorry for them!
It might be easier to let it slide, and I wouldn't dish it back (that makes you no better then them, maybe even worse because it would be deliberate on your part), but if you can I think you should say something that gives them a gentle nudge and reminds them to be more careful about what they are saying... something like "Ouch - that's a bit harsh after all the hard work I've put in' and said with a smile. I think they need to be reminded that thoughtless and careless words still have consequences.
I also like the idea some have mentioned, now you're nearly at maintenance (awesome work by the way!), to look into weight training. Good for keeping weight down (the more muscle you have, the more you burn at resting heart rate) and maintaining, bone density, and just generally looking good and feeling great. Might have to take that one on board myself.
Glad to know the vent helped you - hopefully once they get used to the new you, they'll stop noticing and/or commenting :-)0 -
Don't let it bother you. People are usually a little shocked when they see people lose weight as it is uncommon for a lot of folks, especially if you hang around a larger, inactive crowd. It can be especially hard for women with naturally slim body types because people assume that they are sick, bulimic, or anorexic when in reality they just have a small bone structure and low LBM.
Just come back with a sassy retort and roll with it.
One time when I was younger I went out to lunch with a new friend, and ate tons of food (as was usual for me). Then she seriously accused me of being bulimic. She said I must have thrown my food up in the bathroom because she didn't believe that someone could eat as much as I do and be as slim as I was. I was an active dancer, with low body fat and a small frame.
Yeah, lot's of people are ignorant of the calories in vs calories out concept. Or the IIFYM concept. Really, just a lot of ignorance regarding nutrition and weight loss overall.0 -
Don't let it bother you. People are usually a little shocked when they see people lose weight as it is uncommon for a lot of folks, especially if you hang around a larger, inactive crowd. It can be especially hard for women with naturally slim body types because people assume that they are sick, bulimic, or anorexic when in reality they just have a small bone structure and low LBM.
Just come back with a sassy retort and roll with it.
One time when I was younger I went out to lunch with a new friend, and ate tons of food (as was usual for me). Then she seriously accused me of being bulimic. She said I must have thrown my food up in the bathroom because she didn't believe that someone could eat as much as I do and be as slim as I was. I was an active dancer, with low body fat and a small frame.
Yeah, lot's of people are ignorant of the calories in vs calories out concept. Or the IIFYM concept. Really, just a lot of ignorance regarding nutrition and weight loss overall.
Mmmhmm0 -
0
-
Some people have no class. Plain and simple. No matter what size you are, or what what size they are, it is never OK to call names or try to belittle someone's efforts to be healthier and happier.
I can't stand that. Especially when they think their comments are cute or funny.
Great job on you success!!!
Don't let their negative comments stop you from feeling good about what you have worked so hard for :-D
~ Coming from a 250+lb lady with class.0 -
Honestly, I think the issue is that we've become very accustomed to seeing overweight people as the "norm" and someone who is a healthy weight like you seems "odd" to some.0
-
People who make comments like that are not 'good friends'
I would let the snark fly and let the chips fall where they may.0 -
These people sound like 'frienemies'
They get on with you when you are just like them (tired, depressed, overweight, smoking, using drugs etc)
But start improving your life and feeling optimistic and they feel threatened and will try and pull you down
But this will be subtle or wrapped up as caring advice
If your new life is just for you, then don't let them get to you
As suggested above, think up some good comebacks (a verbal slap in the face)
Deflect their little hooks and barbs and they'll keep their tongues between their teeth next time
Or just smile and ignore them and proceed as usual0 -
1. Jealousy
2. Honestly, they probably genuinely do not understand that what they saying is hurtful.0 -
Aw.... let them eat cake..... I know that nonsense is sometimes difficult to ignore, but you have to.
As to the "scawny" comment.... I'd take that as a "compliment" even if it was not intended as such.0 -
haters gonna hate.
if you're overweight, haters will hate.
if you're at a normal weight, haters will hate.
if you're underweight, haters will hate,
if you're really fit, haters will hate.
i have noticed the haters hate particularly hard on people who made a decision to really change their lives for the better. it's all fueled by self-hatred, jealously, envy, and lack of respect.
just ignore it.
you didn't change for them. you did it for YOU.
because the universal constant is
haters gonna hate.0 -
So... you're 50 years old and use terms like "haters"
I think I see the problem.0 -
Just tell them it sounds like it's time to start cutting the fat from other parts of life, like people you interact with.
Regarding the issues at work, I'd very sweetly go ask HR what they suggest you do, and tell them the comments you receive. It'll be done.0 -
So... you're 50 years old and use terms like "haters"
I think I see the problem.
Aw, you got your grumble pants on.0 -
5'8" at 147 is not "scrawy"
you might need some muscle on you- which would lend to a more solid physic rather than just "weight lost" essentially. (totally up to you and it's a personal preference if you prefer to be more muscular. I prefer it- I'm 5'8" and 160 and no one gives me grief about anything wink wink nudge nudge- partly because I'm a loud mouth and partly because I'm in pretty good shape)
I'd say something rude about their weight.
Seriously.
And when they look shocked and appalled at you- just say "oops- I didn't realize- from what you just said about me I was under the impression it was "give my friend unsolicited advice day"... wrong day? did I mis- read the memo??. or was it just be rude to your friends day because I can insult something else about you if you like instead."
My other favorite is "if I wanted to look like you- I'd eat like you"
seriously- say something- that type of behavior is unacceptable. it's one thing to joke about size and stuff (my rooommate/bestie had a super flat *kitten*- mine- not so much- so we joked about her bony butt and my underwear that were big enough to parachute out of an airplane with)... that or we would have a serious conversation about our goals and what our plan was.
We NEVER actually gave someone **** about it in a mean or snarky way.
That type of behavior from "friends" is unacceptable. seriously. find new friends and don't be shy about saying something to combat this behavior. it is NOT appropriate.
Awesome! Would you please be a little devil on my shoulder the next time I have to attend one of my sister's get-togethers? I can never think of these things when the time is right.0 -
So... you're 50 years old and use terms like "haters"
I think I see the problem.
So, there's a specific age for the use of that word? Huh.0 -
So... you're 50 years old and use terms like "haters"
I think I see the problem.
Aw, you got your grumble pants on.
As always! :drinker:0 -
I think this is good news for you. Now you know which other types of fat you need to cut out of your life. Not many people get a chance to have their Debbie Downers presented to them on a silver platter.
Great job on your success!0 -
So... you're 50 years old and use terms like "haters"
I think I see the problem.
So, there's a specific age for the use of that word? Huh.
Yeah, <150
Categories
- All Categories
- 1.4M Health, Wellness and Goals
- 392.9K Introduce Yourself
- 43.7K Getting Started
- 260.1K Health and Weight Loss
- 175.8K Food and Nutrition
- 47.4K Recipes
- 232.5K Fitness and Exercise
- 413 Sleep, Mindfulness and Overall Wellness
- 6.5K Goal: Maintaining Weight
- 8.5K Goal: Gaining Weight and Body Building
- 152.9K Motivation and Support
- 7.9K Challenges
- 1.3K Debate Club
- 96.3K Chit-Chat
- 2.5K Fun and Games
- 3.6K MyFitnessPal Information
- 23 News and Announcements
- 1.1K Feature Suggestions and Ideas
- 2.5K MyFitnessPal Tech Support Questions