Anybody Else Afraid To Reach Their Goal Weight?

It's the weirdest thing . . . every time I get close to my goal weight, I sabotage myself and gain weight back. It's a mystery to me! I'd love to hear your take on this issue. : )

Replies

  • CurvaciousBeautyToBe
    CurvaciousBeautyToBe Posts: 100 Member
    You definitely arent alone. I recently just did this to myself. :(
  • curly1980
    curly1980 Posts: 117 Member
    I'm no where near my goal yet but was very close before I fell pregnant with my youngest. I wasn't upset about gaining weight as I had an excuse, I was terrified of getting to goal and not being able to maintain. I'm scared of putting it all back on again once I finally get there...sad but true.
  • calpeachmfp
    calpeachmfp Posts: 57 Member
    Hmmm . . . did you ever figure out why you did that CurvaceousBea?

    Still trying to puzzle this one out.

    Thanks for your input!
  • calpeachmfp
    calpeachmfp Posts: 57 Member
    Yup, I think that is part of my issue as well. I was within three pounds of my goal and, slowly but surely, I gained back 10 or so pounds putting me 15 lbs away again. Now I have lost five, so I have 10 to go . . . but I do that whole pesky sabotage thing!
    I may never figure this out, but I will keep trying 'till the end! : ) Yes, I am THAT stubborn!
  • calpeachmfp
    calpeachmfp Posts: 57 Member
    Whoops, that last post was for you Curly1980. You have adorable kids! : )

    Just read your profile and I like how honest you are. To get to where we want to be we have to be completely honest with ourselves. I have lied about how much food I did or didn't eat, too.

    I love this forum . . . so many nice folks . . . nonjudgmental, all wanting to be well. It rocks!

    You said you want to make permanent changes . . . that is great! And you will be showing your children "how to be", too! I still cringe when I think of how I complained about my body and weight around my daughter. Uggh! To be able take that back . . .

    But, anyway, stay on this site as the support will help immeasurably!
    Best of luck!
  • I reached my goal and maintained for 9 months. May-mid August caused a 10 lb gain and now I have to get that weight back off. I did find losing easier than maintaining. I liked to see the drop and I was very disciplined. Maintenance is the steady day by day no change (hopefully) which is not as exciting as a loss. You might be a junkie for the success of weight loss.

    Your plan could work if you don't gain back and not lose it again.
  • My boyfriend told me that he thinks it's because I need structure, and I have to agree. If I am in maitenance there is a lot less structure. The idea of less structure scares me since I am such a regimined person.
  • Shero2013
    Shero2013 Posts: 8 Member
    I have done this before -- sooo guilty! BUT I know my problem. I'm curvy. I like being curvy. When I see those curves start to exit the building, I get scared.... haven't yet found out the best way to tighten without losing them, but I'm working on it!
  • calpeachmfp
    calpeachmfp Posts: 57 Member
    Hmmm . . . lambchoplewis (great name!),
    You might be right . . . let me mull that over . . .
  • calpeachmfp
    calpeachmfp Posts: 57 Member
    Yup . . . structure and routine are vital, aren't they?
    I love the saying:

    Choose . . .
    The Pain of Discipline
    Or
    The Pain of Remorse
  • Wildflower0106
    Wildflower0106 Posts: 247 Member
    Honestly this saddens me. Maintenance isn't the end of anything. If all you focus on is your weight then how are you going to hit fitness goals or work more on body composition. It isn't healthy to have to be in weightloss mode all theI time. When you reach your weightloss goals set a fitness goal, train for a marathon, start a new workout routine. You will still have to have structure and you still have a goal to get to. I have to say I have been maintaining for 2 years and it is by far the best part about losing weight. For me. The best part has been watching my body become stronger and fitter.
  • getitamb
    getitamb Posts: 2,019 Member
    I used to do that with milestones. Now I focus on the health part and motivating myself as we'll as others. When I get scared or complacent i allways say I might not motivate anyone by losing but u definitely won't motivate by gaining. I try to make this journey a learning experience.
  • twistedbutterfly
    twistedbutterfly Posts: 61 Member
    I've done this sooo many times- starting to regain weight just as my weight loss started to become "real" (ie noticeable by others). Looking at my pattern it seems so weird- falling off a diet just when the compliments start. I've been doing a bit of self-examination (I have to as I've just lost a noticeable 42lbs, have so much further to go, and truly need this to be a lifestyle change). Part of this probably has to do with my own natural shyness although I'm sure that's not all of it. What I've started doing is reminding myself that untimely this isn't really about losing weight (at least not for me)- it's about getting and being healthy.
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  • HeyGoRun
    HeyGoRun Posts: 550 Member
    Been there. When i lost a bunch of weight and hit goal it all went downhill, cant even remember why!! I worked so hard, now that i set a new goal weight im beginning to write up what i want to do after I reach that number on scale, the body can always improve...Goals should keep going so we dont fall back. Good luck!
  • calpeachmfp
    calpeachmfp Posts: 57 Member
    @CamoChick,
    First, congrats on that amazing weight loss!
    And, you're right, it's more than just the number on the scale. And I do change up my routines and set new fitness goals all the time. I actually have done one marathon and 7 half marathons. : )
    I do see the changes in my body and LOVE them!
    But there is still some niggling little negative in my brain that I am still trying to figure out . . .
    Thanks for taking the time to comment. : )
  • calpeachmfp
    calpeachmfp Posts: 57 Member
    @getitamb,
    Love the idea about not motivating anyone else if you gain . . . I do want to be a good role model as well. I will keep at it!
    Congrats on your weight loss!
  • calpeachmfp
    calpeachmfp Posts: 57 Member
    @twistedbutter,
    Great job on the 42 lb. weight loss! And great thoughts about want to get and remain healthy. I want to be around for quite a while, so that's motivating for me, too! : )
  • calpeachmfp
    calpeachmfp Posts: 57 Member
    @HeyGoRun,
    I totally agree, new goals all the time so we don't become complacent.
    Good luck to you, too! : )
  • calpeachmfp
    calpeachmfp Posts: 57 Member
    @Shy1975,
    I do believe you have hit the nail on the head:
    "no more excuses, no more blame, no more self pity parties but a rebirth into a life of joy, victory and endless possibilities because I am the Author now".
    So well said!
    We all need to believe we are worthy of whatever we dream we can do!
    Great job on your 50 lb. weight loss, too!

    I love being able to correspond with so many positive people . . . and folks who have been where I have. So empowering!
    Best to you all!
  • KisaraKaiba
    KisaraKaiba Posts: 59 Member
    I am a bit afraid in the sense that I am fearful I won't be able to maintain the weight loss. :/ I have never been able to maintain in the past, but last year I was diagnosed with some health problems and being at a healthy weight is no longer an option for me.

    I'm afraid I will fail at maintenance when I get there. But hey, you've gotta keep trying and get back on the saddle when you fall I suppose...
  • joselo2
    joselo2 Posts: 461
    I know that feeling... as much as I dislike being obese, I have always been, I knowit about myself, people know it aboutme, I guess it almost becomes part of your persona... I almost feel like 'who will I be' if not the big fat guy. It's scary.I can't imagine or recognise myself as a slim person. I know it shouldn't be a big part of who I am, but funny how it goes I guess.
  • 1longroad
    1longroad Posts: 642 Member
    Right now, today, I am at the spot where I get lax, scared, lazy and start eating what I want, when I want. I am determined NOT to do that this time around!! I would love to stay motivated as I would love to encourage and motivate others!! I am trying to focus on health benefits vs the number on the scale, even though I know the number is always haunting me!!

    If anyone desires, send me a friend request and we can work through this day by day together!!!
  • Deipneus
    Deipneus Posts: 1,854 Member
    It's the weirdest thing . . . every time I get close to my goal weight, I sabotage myself and gain weight back. It's a mystery to me! I'd love to hear your take on this issue. : )
    I was not afraid to get to goal weight and did not sabotage it. In fact, I kept going another 17 pounds. I've put 10 back on purposely.

    I've been on maintenance since May of last year and I have to admit that I find maintenance harder in some ways than losing. When I was losing, there was a positive feedback loop. Loss. Reward. More loss. Maintaining carries no such psychological benefit. Since then, I've established some goals having to do with muscle size and I'm lifting weights more and eating accordingly.
  • calpeachmfp
    calpeachmfp Posts: 57 Member
    @Kisara,
    You're right, of course, as they say, there is no finish line!
  • calpeachmfp
    calpeachmfp Posts: 57 Member
    @joselo2,
    You can be anybody you want! : )
    You just don't know it yet . . .

    Start with some small changes:
    Plan your food the night before, maybe take a walk.
    Give yourself an incentive . . . if you do this, then you get that . . . just not food, I guess!
    Set a deadline, like do the food planning for one week.
    Keep accountable by telling people on this forum . . . And keep coming back here daily! The people are great!

    You sound like a nice person, and you are worthy of being as healthy as you can become!

    Best,
    Lynne : )
  • calpeachmfp
    calpeachmfp Posts: 57 Member
    @SunnieRN3,
    I hear you:

    "I am at the spot where I get lax, scared, lazy and start eating what I want, when I want."

    Yup, we are emotional eaters. I eat when I'm happy, I eat when I'm sad, I eat when I'm depressed, and blah-blah-blah! I am SO over myself! It is a cycle I have been challenged by forever. I finally feel like I am making some headway, though. I am meditating daily and it really seems to be making a difference. And, I have gotten on this site just a short time ago, and the support is terrific!

    You are doing great . . . I saw the weight loss! Keep it up. Come on here when you want to eat. Encourage somebody else and it encourages you, too! That is what I am finding anyway. : )

    I'd be happy to be MFP friends!

    Best,
    Lynne : )
  • thutch40
    thutch40 Posts: 26 Member
    Hi,
    So glad I found this board because I really do not know how I feel about reaching goal. When I first started my journey u hear wished you only had 20 more pounds to go and when it becomes reality it's does a number on you. I have 19lbs to go to reach goal and I have to admit I do not know how to take all of this in. It seems like my mind has not caught up with everything.
  • I reached my goal weight and now I'm obsessed with body fat percentage. My goal weight was not as flattering as I had hoped.