Getting discouraged..

2

Replies

  • JustDrea113
    JustDrea113 Posts: 15 Member
    Are you being so restrictive that you are sick of dieting? Up your calories and add a little exercise or eat some fun foods that you feel are "forbidden". What helps me: I want to eat a bagel for breakfast with veggie cream cheese, so I eat half of one with as much cream cheese as I want, every morning until my craving is satisfied. It keeps me from over eating the bagels because I know I can have it again tomorrow. Wanted ice cream sandwiches, so I bought a box. I will split an ice cream sandwich with my daughter every day until the box is gone. Skinny people eat burgers, they eat fries, they have ice cream sundaes, but they may eat HALF a burger, eat fries for lunch with a salad, get a small ice cream sundae and not eat the last two bites. If you look at it as a "DIET", you will get discouraged. If you look at it as a behavior change, you can keep it up for a life time. AND if you revert back to old behaviors (as I did the last couple of weeks), that's OK, because you just start back up again with your plan. Have goals and a plan, and you can do it. Also, don't be afraid to tweek your plans and goals. My plan is to run on Mondays and Wednesdays, bike on Tuesdays and Thursdays, walk on Fridays and spin on Saturdays and Sundays. If it rains, I will do the elliptical or weight train. I will pack my lunch for work every day and only eat what is in the bag (hard and fast rule that worked for my brother when he lost 20 pounds last year) and make sure I add a snack I enjoy to the bag every day so that I don't get the urge to "eat outside the bag" LOL and to make sure I have fresh veggies ready to eat so I can snack on them while I make dinner. You need to make your own plans and goals based on what your challenges are. You CAN do this!

    Based on this response I want to give you a big hug! This is so encouraging and i'm not really in a slump!
  • MSGeorgiaPeachy
    MSGeorgiaPeachy Posts: 3 Member
    First of all congratulations on sticking with it long enough to have some success and yes to get discouraged. Every single person who has to watch what they eat and no longer eat with reckless abandon gets discouraged. No pain no weight loss.
    Decide what you will eat in the morning. Enter it in your diary. PLAY with it! Are you setting yourself to go over your calorie goal change your plan. Want to eat more add some exercise. Never be surprised at the end of the day that you went over. Now it's out of the way! You have finished your food struggle for the day. Don't fixate on food, don't eat anything you did not plan on eating. Get in the habit of giving yourself a manicure often. You can't snack with wet nails and a fresh manicure makes every girl look better. When you look good - you feel good about yourself. You control food. Food does not control you. If you don't like the gym just move more, walk, dance, hoola hoop, jump rope, swim, roller blade. Find something you like to do that is harder than eating. Your body is a gift, a priceless gift. Treat it like one. Whatever you do, don't give up.
  • JustDrea113
    JustDrea113 Posts: 15 Member
    As stated, you have to find what works for you. My biggest motivation to work out is eating! The two go hand in hand. Want to eat more then work out more. And working out more without eating more can hinder your weight loss! It's win win. Also I feel like a bad *kitten* skinny ***** when i'm on that elliptical! And like i could kick anyones *kitten* when I'm using the dumbells! It's a mentality that I"ve built. When I started working out in March, I picked ppl in the gym and thought, "If I could look like that!" Now ppl who have been going to the gym regularly pick me out and notice my transformation. I am in a fitness group on facebook that helps me soooo much! So many knowledgable ppl and we all help eachother. Having friends that are on your level with weight loss means so much! The biggest thing I think is that it's ok to give in once in a while, but never ok to give up. I ate 10 oreo cookies last night! lol 10! I woke up feeling like a fatty. Eating unhealthy foods one day isn't going to make you gain weight just like eating healthy for one day won't make you lose weight. You don't have to be extreme to see change, you just have to be consistent! That goes both ways! Good luck!! YOU GOT THIS!!
  • Wish there was a like button. So many here have given such great suggestions!!! I know I'm not the OP, but thank you guys anyway!!! (: xxxx
  • lsorci919
    lsorci919 Posts: 772 Member
    First off congrats on the 19 lbs! Thats awesome! we have lost the same amount so far! :)

    I just joined a 90 day challenge for woman on here and had to post pictures of my body and my weight, bmi, bf% and measurements. Seeing pictures of myself and the high numbers and then posting it all for all the woman in the group to see was motivating enough!! I can not look like this anymore! There is no excuse for me!

    on another note, a tip for eating would be instead of eating just small portions, which can leave you feeling hungry, tired, moody and fatigued, eat foods with lower calories so you can have larger portions. Almost everyday I have a huge salad and I feel very full after that. sometimes I add grilled chicken or shrimp, either way the calories in it aren't large so I can actually fill up on it.

    Also I try to do my workout first thing in the morning so I don't keep putting it off and end up losing motivation. If I dont do it in the morning I most likely wont do it at all that day.

    Good luck! you can do this!!
  • SLLRunner
    SLLRunner Posts: 12,942 Member
    What keeps me motivated is how great I feel when I eat as healthy as I can and exercise every single day. I am also motivated knowing by how horrible I feel at my highest weight (210 lbs when I was in my early twenties, after my mother died) and how great I feel at my healthiest weight (which I am ten pounds away from!).
  • tennileb
    tennileb Posts: 265 Member
    19 lbs is fantastic. Mini goals are great I think they help keep you going and they reward you along the way.

    Don't over restrict your intake, make sure you are tracking your food and eating enough. It's also good to once a week look over your intake and exercise from the past week and see what you can do better.

    Keep up the good work!!
  • klinger6395
    klinger6395 Posts: 44 Member
    why give up.....?
  • Momjogger
    Momjogger Posts: 750 Member
    Hi, I have no discipline and refuse to exercise (traumatised by school phys. ed. :-) ) Just gradually feeling more energetic as weight comes off. So I suppose I'm doing it all wrong but I have lost about a stone in 3 months on here by keeping my food diary on here every day. I'm plateauing now so I've got a bit fed up with it. My way to get through it is to have a planned day off today and back on the wagon tomorrow. I've looked up the calories for my old favourite treats and I'm thinking that if I weaken again I'll have a treat on Sundays if I want to, when I know if I've got calories in the bank from going slightly under during the week. 50 cals under a day for 6 days is 350 cals. More than enough for a Mars Bar. Although now I realise I can incorporate these things if I want to I probably won't get that "I'm deprived" craving. If it helps - lowest calorie choccy - Milky Way (about 80) or Curly Wurly (about 115). Crisps - Quavers about 80. Personal favourite - take away - half a Special Chow Mein - (about 375) Phwoar!
    Hopefully now I won't feel so much like I'm on a diet as nothing is forbidden - it's all about the cals. More about healthier eating with the occasional treat and feeling good.
    I suppose I'm basically saying of you do break the diet don't feel bad, you're only human, as long as you carry on next day you'll be fine.
    Hope this helps you to feel better if you do weaken and well done for what you've achieved so far? It's hard once the initial burst of enthusiasm wears off but keep soldiering on. :-) :-) :-)
    LOLOL. I was traumatized by gym in school as well, but I found exercises I enjoyed. I HIGHLY recommend you try to add some. I started with walking, then tried zumba and after 5 classes in the back tripping around, I really started to like it and all the other goofs in class that were just like me. I added riding my bike again, and three years later I now do spin classes, run, strength train, etc. Please don't let a bad childhood experience keep you from adding healthy habits into your new lifestyle. Once you start, you will be amazed to find what you can do and it increases your confidence.
  • My first recommendation would be to set a short term goal. Looking at the end goal in ANYTHING can be overwhelming if it is a long journey. I do look at my weight loss as a journey. That journey for me has sometimes lead me back to a higher weight, but the biggest and hardest thing to remember (at least for me) is that I do have control of where I go on my journey. I have overall lost about 60 pounds, most of that I have been able to keep off for more than a year, but sometimes my brain plays a trick on my when looking in the mirror and I feel like I am back to 223 again. The easiest way for me is doing a reality check and trying on an old a piece of older clothing. Guess what....they are too big.

    Here's some wonderful things you've done so far:
    1. Decided that you wanted to make a change (hopefully for yourself more than just for the wedding)
    2. You've set an overall goal
    3. You've successfully lost 19 pounds
    4. You've reached out to others to help with your journey (THE BEST THING in my mind)

    Some helpful things may be: setting short term goals; do not deprive yourself (if you want your favorite candy have it; portion it out ahead of time so you do not binge); keep a good support group for the good days and the bad.

    You can add me as a friend if you would like. =)
  • qtgonewild
    qtgonewild Posts: 1,930 Member
    fyi I bought ice cream sandwiches fat boy jr brand they are minis and 110 calories each. they are perfect size.
  • mjf0461
    mjf0461 Posts: 470 Member
    You didn't gain it overnight so your not going to lose it overnight. You need to remember, slower you lose the longer it will stay off. Faster weight loss is usually muscle and you don't want to lose muscle. I was taught that after 3 weeks change your routine up abit to shock your system. Your metabolism gets used to the same thing over and over . Try something new. Good Luck
  • Try to remember what go you motivated in the first place. What had you thinking 'enough is enough"?

    Plus, 19lbs is impressive!
    WE NEED YOU TO KEEP TRYING SO WE ALL KEEP TRYING TOO!
  • kfavulous
    kfavulous Posts: 106 Member
    My favourite motivational phrase:

    "You didn't gain 20lbs in a week so don't expect to lose 20lbs this week"
  • graysmom2005
    graysmom2005 Posts: 1,882 Member
    Are you being so restrictive that you are sick of dieting? Up your calories and add a little exercise or eat some fun foods that you feel are "forbidden". What helps me: I want to eat a bagel for breakfast with veggie cream cheese, so I eat half of one with as much cream cheese as I want, every morning until my craving is satisfied. It keeps me from over eating the bagels because I know I can have it again tomorrow. Wanted ice cream sandwiches, so I bought a box. I will split an ice cream sandwich with my daughter every day until the box is gone. Skinny people eat burgers, they eat fries, they have ice cream sundaes, but they may eat HALF a burger, eat fries for lunch with a salad, get a small ice cream sundae and not eat the last two bites. If you look at it as a "DIET", you will get discouraged. If you look at it as a behavior change, you can keep it up for a life time. AND if you revert back to old behaviors (as I did the last couple of weeks), that's OK, because you just start back up again with your plan. Have goals and a plan, and you can do it. Also, don't be afraid to tweek your plans and goals. My plan is to run on Mondays and Wednesdays, bike on Tuesdays and Thursdays, walk on Fridays and spin on Saturdays and Sundays. If it rains, I will do the elliptical or weight train. I will pack my lunch for work every day and only eat what is in the bag (hard and fast rule that worked for my brother when he lost 20 pounds last year) and make sure I add a snack I enjoy to the bag every day so that I don't get the urge to "eat outside the bag" LOL and to make sure I have fresh veggies ready to eat so I can snack on them while I make dinner. You need to make your own plans and goals based on what your challenges are. You CAN do this!

    +1!!!

    Also, find some activities that you love, and if you can afford it get a Polar. My magic combo was MFP, a Polar, and group ex. I started logging foods at first and fell in love with spinning. I then could see what I burned on my Polar (ie 500 calories for example). I would then maybe go to the movies and actually see how many calories were in that candy. MORE THAN WHAT I BURNED IN CYCLE. I kicked *kitten* in that class...there was no way I was eating it back in 20 minutes by way of Twizzlers. It all kind of came together and motivated me. The group ex classes kept me accountable and not bored. I had fun for the first time ever...and MFP/Polar let me see how many calroies I burned by a whole hour of hard work vs how quickly the wrong food choices added up.

    3 years later I teach group ex "full time" and I'm the same weight I was when I first reached my goal. You got it!
  • Woot Woot 19 pounds is a huge accomplishment.... that's a 66,500 calorie deficit!!! That means along the way you made healthy choices so that your body would release the weight. Continue to nourish your body. Don't starve it because of desperation for an event because high probability you will only gain it back. Keep going never give up. You are achieving what you want. Your body is throwing a fit because it would rather have all the addictive foods it has been use to, but you will get over this and remember healthy is way sexier than simply being skinny. You got this girl!
  • SLLRunner
    SLLRunner Posts: 12,942 Member
    Every time you get discouraged and want to give up, instead of saying how far you have to go to reach your goal say how far you have come.

    My aunt just finished chemo for breast cancer and what kept her motivated was walking every day and constantly looking at how many treatments she had done rather than how many she had to go. She is truly my inspiration in everything I do.
  • Momjogger
    Momjogger Posts: 750 Member
    Sounds like you doing a real good job! When I get discouraged I poke myself with a pushpin. I would not suggest this for you though, because trust me it smarts. Try to focus on the goals you have met since you started. You have a lot to be proud of and even if you make some mistakes on the way you are still making progress.
    :laugh:
  • Momjogger
    Momjogger Posts: 750 Member
    You got some fabulous advice on this thread. I am impressed and it makes me want to friend all the responders! I suggest you do the same. Can't get any better than all this positive support!
  • JuliaSBoyd
    JuliaSBoyd Posts: 9 Member
    Congratulations on the 19lbs, what an amazing start.

    As a lot of people have said on this thread. Look at what you have done not how far you have to go. When it comes to your total goal, try doing it in little segments. Give yourself a treat when you reach your goal. Maybe 'I aim to lose 10 lbs and when I get to target I will treat myself to a mani'.

    Also always make sure you always have healthy snacks at the ready to avoid heading for the nearest unhealthy snack.

    If you have something off plan, don't beat yourself up over it, we are all human, but make sure you log it as it still counts and you can look back and see what is going on with your routine to see if there are any triggers. I know I have many.

    KEEP LOGGING ... the worst thing you can do is stop. Its a slippery slope, I know I have just re-started after regaining 10 kgs of the 26 kgs I lost last year.

    Have lots of positive friends on there who not only have your back with encouraging comments and advise but will share new recipe ideas with you so that you don't get stuck in the rut of eating the same things over and getting bored with them.

    From the amount of comments you have got you know that there are people out there willing to give you a helping hand and a virtual ((HUG)) if needed.

    KEEP GOING.... YOU"VE GOT THIS!
  • robot_potato
    robot_potato Posts: 1,535 Member
    Set yourself mini goals, and reward yourself for them. For me, if I stick to my calorie goal for the week (slightly over/under is ok, overeating/starving is not) I go to Starbucks and treat myself. When I hit a milestone, like 30-40-50 pounds lost, I get myself something to help with my new lifestyle and keep me motivated. I've earned a new shorts& tank top, new brake pads for my bike, a barbell and some plates. Next I will be getting 25lb plates for my barbell, and then maybe a new bike helmet, then new running shoes... And this is what keeps me going.

    You are doing a wonderful job! Keep up the good work.
  • First of all, huge congrats on your 19 pounds lost! I have lost 14, but I'm getting there! One thing I wanted to share, is something that the person who told me about myfitnesspal.com said, and it really made an impact on me. She said that we have to keep in mind that our bodies don't actually belong to us, and we have to accept the fact that they are on loan from our creator. Just like you would respect the car that you borrowed from your friend, you have to respect the body that you borrowed from your creator. I'm sure some of you are not spiritual, and no offense is intended, but regardless of your spiritual beliefs, the idea is the same. We are only here for a short time, so we need to take care of what we have been given. The better we take care of our bodies, the happier we will be, and for a longer period of time. You are young, and have your whole life ahead of you. I am almost 43 years old, and have been dealing with heart disease, diabetes and arthritis for several years. I want to lessen the burden on my poor body, so that I can spend more time with my beautiful grandchildren. Make the wedding one goal, but make the ultimate goal be your longevity and your long-term happiness. If you are a spiritual person, let all of your goals be to please God, and show appreciation for the life you have been given. God bless, and good luck!
  • It helps to find a means of exercise that you actually enjoy. For me, running is fun when I have good music to listen to. Also, DDR is a great workout, and I always enjoyed it. Some people really like yoga. You just have to find the work-out that you like, so it keeps you WANTING to do it often enough :P Also, finding healthy foods that you actually enjoy.
  • harleygroomer
    harleygroomer Posts: 373 Member
    You need to rethink this journey. This is a LIFESTYLE change and NOT a diet. This is the rest of your life so you need to think about how you want to live it. I too am making the journey and am suffering under a really mean trainer--BUT she is correct--this is not a diet. A diet didn't MAKE you this way and a diet won't DROP it. So this is what you need to do--be religious in your blog recordings--I go over in the cals and go under in the exercise counting. This site isn't really correct on a lot of their choises--CLOSE but still leave your self some room. I still record my days and I am to the point I can look at something and SEE the calories. I really hated walking at first now--NOW I can walk forever without getting winded and am starting to run (WHICH I HATE) Have faith--we have all had to cross that barrier into liking exercise AND ourselves again. Small large or in between--you have to like your self.
  • HeinekenMan
    HeinekenMan Posts: 80 Member
    You know why you want to look good at that wedding? Because nobody will believe it! Aside from the people on here, I doubt anybody believes you can do it. So prove them wrong. The greatest benefit you will get will not be how you look in a dress. And I doubt it'll add a lot of years to your life. The greatest benefit will be the satisfaction of knowing that you can do something that is hard. You're young. You have your whole life ahead of you. If you can achieve this, it will pave your way. It will show you that you can't be stopped, that you are a fighter and a winner. Ask anyone on here who has succeeded. This is going to change your life.
  • AleciaG724
    AleciaG724 Posts: 705 Member
    I can't see your diary, so I don't know how many calories you're eating. But I can tell you this - I started in April with a goal of 1670 to lose 2#/week. After a few weeks, I felt like I could keep doing that for a really long time. I was not hungry unless I waited too long between meals. Once I added exercise I could even eat a couple hundred more calories on those days, but I try to only eat about half back. Some people have cheat days where they don't log, or don't care if they go over once a week, or once a month... I find that I don't even go over my calories if I have a cheat day, because I'm too full. I think it's a good idea to take it slowly if you have a lot to lose (like I do!) so you don't feel deprived or that you are always on a "diet". I've since lowered my cals to 1480 on the days I don't work out & that is a manageable amount for me. I log and measure pretty carefully. On days that I have a huge burn from hiking for 2 hours, you can bet I'm going to have a huge slice of deep dish pizza and dessert, too - but I'll still be under my calories!

    60-70# in a year is doable for sure, just don't quit! You will look so great at the wedding & think of how happy you will be that you lost the weight when you look back at the wedding photos!
  • Papillon22
    Papillon22 Posts: 1,160 Member
    What about setting mini-goals for yourself. Rather than a long term goal many months away, try setting something a month (or even a week) away. It could be a weight goal, or it could be an exercise goal like "burn 1,000 calories this week" or "work out 4 times for at least 45 minutes." I find that worked for me when I was feeling like giving up.
    I belong to a mini goals group here on mfp and I love setting weekly goals and accomplishing them. Join us! :flowerforyou:
  • sa11yjane
    sa11yjane Posts: 491 Member
    Discipline has to kick in when motivation leaves off. Discipline is doing what needs to be done even when you don't want to do it.
  • royalty819
    royalty819 Posts: 145 Member
    I started at 212 pounds, I've only lost 12 pounds since early August. What I do to stay motivated is I hang all of my clothes that are too small in my closet, that way every day I get dressed, I have to look at those small clothes. I'm the type of person that has to be hard on myself or I will give up, or take it as a joke. I have a fit woman as my computer desktop background with a caption that says "Do you really want to eat that junk food?" I have a photoshopped picture of me that makes me look 125 pounds as my phone wallpaper, seeing that keeps me going. When I grocery shop, I only go on the outskirts of the grocery section (where the meats, fruit, veggies, dairy, and other cold foods are) the reason for this is because all of the foods and nutrients we need, are on the out skirts.
  • I like that too!
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