Food addicts 12 steps

dwarfer22
dwarfer22 Posts: 358 Member
edited September 22 in Motivation and Support
So I have come (over the last several months) to understand that I am a food addict. Just before New Years I began to eat using the foodaddictsannonomous.org website as my guide. So far, great food plan. However, I wanted to fully invest myself in the program and work the 12 steps to recovery, trouble with that is I am not that religious a person. Raised Catholic, kinda fell off the wagon, but still do holidays and such. My thought at the time of reading it was that it was geared only to those who believed in God, and seemed exclude those who didn't. It also seemed to rely on God to fix our problems through prayer and seemed to dismiss the strength within the person. While I admire those who can fully commit to such a program, I know it is not going to work for me. I want to be the one in charge of my sucess or failure, and should I succeed, I am sure it will feel that much sweeter to know that it was all down to me.

prepare for a bundle:
Below I have copied the original 12 steps direct from their website.
Below that I have copied my modified version that is hopefully neutral. I would love to hear feedback, both positive and negative to improve the text. I realize I may be unleashing a firestorm, but I want to try and better myself through an FAA plan that is accessable to everyone.

Thx again for the time in reading this,
Mel

Food Addicts Anonymous Twelve Steps


1. We admitted we were powerless over our food addiction - that our lives had become unmanageable.

2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood God.

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

7. Humbly asked God to remove our shortcomings.

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.

9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood God, praying only for knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out.

12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to food addicts, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

ok, now mine:

Food Addicts Anonymous Twelve Steps
1. We admitted we were powerless over our food addiction - that our lives had become unmanageable.

2. Came to believe that a food plan and way of life that focused on structure could restore us to sanity.

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of science and modern medicine.

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

5. Admitted to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

6. Were entirely ready to commit our minds to removing all these defects of character.

7. Made a resolve to try to remove our shortcomings.

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.

9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure themselves or others.

10. Continued to take personal inventory, and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.

11. Sought through reflection and meditation to improve our understanding our purpose and direction, searching for knowledge of our destiny and discovering the power within to carry that out.

12. Having had a mental awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to food addicts, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

discuss
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Replies

  • danyelpink
    danyelpink Posts: 26 Member
    Your version is great for those of us that aren't religious. I don't believe that prayer will make me stop eating. I realize that many people find strength through their religion, but not me. Best wishes to you!
  • I'm with you on the second 12 steps. I don't leave anything up to a higher power because that makes it seem like I have no control in life. I am in charge of myself. I make the choice to binge and I make the choice to change.

    Great job!
  • oxFaithxo
    oxFaithxo Posts: 160 Member
    Love it, I like the fact you took something and made it your own (I feel like i am a judge on AMerican Idol LOL)...

    Yes i am not religious at all, my mom is kinda Catholic and my dad is Atheist so i mean we pretty much got to choose what we wanted to do... we still do all holidays but more commercialized and such.

    This is awesome i love it...
  • mrsdiaz
    mrsdiaz Posts: 29 Member
    I am religious, however I am a solid believer that God helps those that help themselves ... so I like a combo of the both. Either way kudos to you and good luck on your journey!

    Happy losing!
  • Healthydiner65
    Healthydiner65 Posts: 1,455 Member
    You do not have to be religious or even believe in God. Make your higher power a door knob. It does not matter. What matters is that you admit you have a problem and are willing to do anything to get rid of it. Good Luck!
  • TheKitsune6
    TheKitsune6 Posts: 5,798 Member
    The first step bothers me

    "We admitted we were powerless over our food addiction"

    We aren't powerless at all. The point of it existing in the original 12 steps is because by admitting you are powerless you put everything in gods hands. I think the first non-christian step should be admitting that we have COMPLETE control over our food addiction. By taking responsibility we seize the right to make our own decisions :)
  • rosebarnalice
    rosebarnalice Posts: 3,488 Member
    Sorry for length, here, but I hope it helps:

    A friend of mine is a social worker and counselor who, among other things, has organized and hosted many 12-step groups in prisons and social service settings. As an athiest herself, she is very sympathetic but here's how she explains it to her clients who have issues with "The God Stuff."

    When people enter a 12-step program, they are usually angry at themselves and overwhelmed with guilt at their inability to "control themselves" in whatever area of their lives they're 12-Stepping (drinking, drugging, lying, craving sex, overeating. . . whatever. . ) But you know what? It's not all about you! Yes, SOME of it is about you, but not all of it.

    Some of what makes you do what you do *IS* about YOU. And so there are steps focused on YOU facing and accepting those parts, and taking responsibility for them.

    And some of it is about OTHER PEOPLE. And so there are steps focused on OTHERS-- taking responsibility for how your behavior has hurt or affected other people, and then making amends for your behavior.

    But then some of what makes you do what you do is. . . well . . . not about you--it's about the nature of the universe. People are obsessive, greedy, compulsive little beasts-- it's part of our success as a species on this planet! Some of us manifest it in untidy-er or uglier ways than others, and we've got to deal with that. . . but beating ourselves up for being. . . well. . . . HUMAN doesn't help the matter. YES, you need to control your ugly little beast . . . but you don't get to take the blame for having a beast to begin with-- that's out of your control, so deal with it!

    Call it evolution or human nature if you like; call it God's Will or the work of the Devil, if that's the way you roll. But whether you take the 12-Step Higher Power to mean "The Universe" or "Nature" or "The Cosmic Muffin" or a deity (or deities) recognized by some organized religion is irrelevant. The point is to reframe your thinking and not make EVERYTHING that you're going through about YOU.

    I hope this helps!
  • curvykent
    curvykent Posts: 140 Member
    The beauty about the 12 step program is that you can choose what your higher power is. You don't have to be religious, however if you are then you have a higher power to turn your care to. For those of us (such as myself) that do not have a religious preference we can turn our will and care over to something greater than ourselves. For you, it's science and modern medicine (forgive me if that is slightly incorrect- I have horrible short term memory). So, without even knowing it you've already practiced the steps as they were designed.

    Recovery from addiction of any sort is not a mind over matter deal. Anyone who believes this is ignorant on the subject. It's a bold statement for some but anyone with experience in addiction studies, psychology and so forth know the science behind this. A person's choice is only one small part of addiction. Chemical imbalance and phenomenon of craving is stronger and outbeats a person's ability to choose.

    12 step programs certainly aren't for everybody. It takes a degree of humility, openmindedness and persaverence that not everybody is willing to put in. And perhaps the word "addiction" is used loosely for some.

    The most successful part of a 12 step program is that it is a group of people who share a common bond, that are willing to admit defeat, and are williing to take and practice suggestions. All things seem easier when you're doing it with people who are in your same boat. Hence the reason we are all MyFitnessPal users.

    So with all that being said, I just want to clarify that while on first glance the 12steps seem religious a non religious person such as myself has stayed clean and sober 4 years through practicing them.

    And, you may or may not be truly addicted to food but either way I wish you the best on your journey!
  • Canonoch
    Canonoch Posts: 120
    Great Job. I really like your version as it makes ourselves accountable for it all and not placing our failures into a high power to be solved.
  • TheKitsune6
    TheKitsune6 Posts: 5,798 Member
    But whether you take the 12-Step Higher Power to mean "The Universe" or "Nature" or "The Cosmic Muffin" or a deity (or deities) recognized by some organized religion is irrelevant.

    Lol, Cosmic Muffin!
  • dwarfer22
    dwarfer22 Posts: 358 Member
    The first step bothers me

    "We admitted we were powerless over our food addiction"

    We aren't powerless at all. The point of it existing in the original 12 steps is because by admitting you are powerless you put everything in gods hands. I think the first non-christian step should be admitting that we have COMPLETE control over our food addiction. By taking responsibility we seize the right to make our own decisions :)

    Yeah that one kinda gets me too. It's a work in progress and I am trying to resolve that one now.

    edited to add:
    1. We admitted we were addicted to food - that our lives had become unmanageable.
  • dwarfer22
    dwarfer22 Posts: 358 Member



    But then some of what makes you do what you do is. . . well . . . not about you--it's about the nature of the universe. People are obsessive, greedy, compulsive little beasts-- it's part of our success as a species on this planet! Some of us manifest it in untidy-er or uglier ways than others, and we've got to deal with that. . . but beating ourselves up for being. . . well. . . . HUMAN doesn't help the matter. YES, you need to control your ugly little beast . . . but you don't get to take the blame for having a beast to begin with-- that's out of your control, so deal with it!

    Call it evolution or human nature if you like; call it God's Will or the work of the Devil, if that's the way you roll. But whether you take the 12-Step Higher Power to mean "The Universe" or "Nature" or "The Cosmic Muffin" or a deity (or deities) recognized by some organized religion is irrelevant. The point is to reframe your thinking and not make EVERYTHING that you're going through about YOU.

    I agree with everything except this, although I do sorta understand it. To my mind it is all about me. The choices I made in terms of food is all down to me. Yes, I am influenced by outside forces, peoples expectations, family upbringing, financial stability, etc but at the end of the day it is still me stuffing a sweet roll into my face. And if you look at their website they state that our food addiction is a physical allergic reaction, if you will, to certain foods, which triggers the intense cravings that makes up our addiction. How is a physical allergic reaction in any way considered a higher power? Are they trying to say God made me allergic to spaghetti? Again, I kind of understand it, but it is a bit of a contradiction.
  • curvykent
    curvykent Posts: 140 Member
    You don't know the steps unless you have done them and if you haven't worked the steps with someone who has worked the steps then you are merely giving your opinion on something you know nothing about.

    I am finding this thread quite entertaining.

    I'm an opinionated person too. Don't get me wrong. But it worries me when something as delicate as a recovery program which so many people need, is slandered by people who know nothing about it. Your inaccurate views may change the opinion of someone who's life depends on it.

    Just food for thought. No pun intended :wink:
  • rosebarnalice
    rosebarnalice Posts: 3,488 Member



    But then some of what makes you do what you do is. . . well . . . not about you--it's about the nature of the universe. People are obsessive, greedy, compulsive little beasts-- it's part of our success as a species on this planet! Some of us manifest it in untidy-er or uglier ways than others, and we've got to deal with that. . . but beating ourselves up for being. . . well. . . . HUMAN doesn't help the matter. YES, you need to control your ugly little beast . . . but you don't get to take the blame for having a beast to begin with-- that's out of your control, so deal with it!

    Call it evolution or human nature if you like; call it God's Will or the work of the Devil, if that's the way you roll. But whether you take the 12-Step Higher Power to mean "The Universe" or "Nature" or "The Cosmic Muffin" or a deity (or deities) recognized by some organized religion is irrelevant. The point is to reframe your thinking and not make EVERYTHING that you're going through about YOU.

    I agree with everything except this, although I do sorta understand it. To my mind it is all about me. The choices I made in terms of food is all down to me. Yes, I am influenced by outside forces, peoples expectations, family upbringing, financial stability, etc but at the end of the day it is still me stuffing a sweet roll into my face. And if you look at their website they state that our food addiction is a physical allergic reaction, if you will, to certain foods, which triggers the intense cravings that makes up our addiction. How is a physical allergic reaction in any way considered a higher power? Are they trying to say God made me allergic to spaghetti? Again, I kind of understand it, but it is a bit of a contradiction.

    It's sometimes difficult to draw the distinction between what is about you and what isn't. When you given into y\the ugly beast and feed it a sweet roll--and then blame yourself for giving in to the beast again, that IS about you. But it's ALSO about you when you buck up, take responsibility and say, "nope! I'm not feeding you, beast, even if you kick and scream and holler and stamp your little beastie feet!" .

    But if you say to yourself, "I'm a bad person because I have a beast that still bugs me even after all these years of fighting and learning strategies to deal with it"--then that is blaming yourself for something that is NOT about you.
  • dwarfer22
    dwarfer22 Posts: 358 Member
    I'm an opinionated person too. Don't get me wrong. But it worries me when something as delicate as a recovery program which so many people need, is slandered by people who know nothing about it. Your inaccurate views may change the opinion of someone who's life depends on it.

    I don't feel I am "slandering" anything. If you go back and read the original post it is quite the opposite. I am not trying to tell anyone that they should follow my 12 steps or that they are better than the original. I was just looking for input as to how to modify them for a non-religeous person. I really want to do the steps, but I am not going to turn myself into a hypocrite, praying to something I don't truly believe in and waiting for a miracle from a higher power. I also stated that I was very happy for people who were able to use the steps as written and be successful. Good for them. I think faith is a very strong force for good, and they should be proud of their beliefs. It seems like you have taken my post as a personal attack and a proclamation that the original program is unworkable, neither is the case.

    I was afraid this was going to happen. All I wanted was some personal input from people familiar w/ 12 step programs on how to tailor a program to suit an individuals needs. Again, I am NOT saying that my way is right or that the original is wrong, I am merely trying to find a way to use the steps in a way that is applicable to my life and my situation. Sorry to anyone if I have caused offense.
  • janesmith1
    janesmith1 Posts: 1,511 Member
    Sorry I posted in the wrong thread...
  • pelican16
    pelican16 Posts: 3 Member
    There is a great front page article in Washington Post today about an atheist who did this program imagining 'God' who doesnt exist to help him through it. Its more about the prayer than religion itself. I thought that was amazing.
    I am more spiritual than religious.. so it bothers me to keep saying 'Grant me the wisdom or willpower'.. I'd rather say 'I ought to..'

    http://www.washingtonpost.com/local/non-believers-say-their-prayers-to-no-one/2013/06/24/b7c8cf50-d915-11e2-a9f2-42ee3912ae0e_story.html
  • 62texan
    62texan Posts: 13
    Twelve step programs are spiritual, not religious. Your higher power is whatever you want it to be. I believe that anyone who is an addict is powerless over their addiction. I have been involved in a 12-step program for almost seven years, and it saved my life.
  • Where is this on my i phone app? How do i get to it?
  • As I understand it, your higher power could be a telephone pole, as long as you recognized your own powerlessness and turned your issues over to it. You don't need to believe in God to assign power to something other than food. That's the important part..
  • abtsdiet
    abtsdiet Posts: 39 Member
    It seems like you are still relying on your personal strength and ability. And that you still want to be in control.

    That might work for you.

    Also...you don't have to believe in God in order for him to work in your life.

    Good luck.
  • UrbanLotus
    UrbanLotus Posts: 1,163 Member
    Your version is great for those of us that aren't religious. I don't believe that prayer will make me stop eating. I realize that many people find strength through their religion, but not me. Best wishes to you!

    Agreed, this is great!
  • GymPoet
    GymPoet Posts: 107 Member
    No need to officially re-write the steps, as I believe many nonbeliever folks who use them successfully and gratefully DO call the Food Plan their Higher Power. You might meet some of them at a 12-step meeting.
  • abtsdiet
    abtsdiet Posts: 39 Member
    I just read some of the other posts. I am not surprised that some people are offended. Recovery and 12 steps can be a very sensitive issue.

    Whatever you do...I hope it works for you!
  • BillVL
    BillVL Posts: 1
    Not sure if you are still a member or not, but I could not help responding to this.
    You should read "Beyond My Wildest Dreams" which is the story of the lady who founded Overeaters Anonymous. Her first translations of the Alcoholic Anonymous 12 Steps are very much like yours. She too was as a "rational thinker" who wanted nothing to do with God in the Steps. Her journey to what you see today is a very interesting one.

    More power to you (pun intended) if you do not need a connection to a Higher Power through a Spiritual Awaken that is promised in the 12th Step. For me my journey required that Power. Before than my life was one continuous search for that "Perfect" diet or exercise program that would let ME be perfect.
  • jellybeanhed313
    jellybeanhed313 Posts: 344 Member
    bump for later reading. I like this.
  • nancy10272004
    nancy10272004 Posts: 277 Member
    Food Addicts Anonymous Twelve Steps
    1. We admitted we were powerless over our food addiction - that our lives had become unmanageable.

    This is exactly why I left OA. I figured that if I couldn't even buy into Step 1, it wasn't the program for me. It just seems so weak to say you are powerless over your own actions. Of course you are!

    Where is the personal responsibility? Accountability?

    Obviously, this is a sore spot for me. I am not passive. I am not powerless.
  • tj1376
    tj1376 Posts: 1,402 Member
    I like your version, its much more realistic. However, in both versions I don't see how 8 and 9 are applicable. We hurt ourselves with our addiction. Not others. Whoever made up the 12 step program figured it would work for all addictions, but it doesnt. There aren't 12 steps for everything.
  • Healthydiner65
    Healthydiner65 Posts: 1,455 Member
    Not sure if you are still a member or not, but I could not help responding to this.
    You should read "Beyond My Wildest Dreams" which is the story of the lady who founded Overeaters Anonymous. Her first translations of the Alcoholic Anonymous 12 Steps are very much like yours. She too was as a "rational thinker" who wanted nothing to do with God in the Steps. Her journey to what you see today is a very interesting one.

    More power to you (pun intended) if you do not need a connection to a Higher Power through a Spiritual Awaken that is promised in the 12th Step. For me my journey required that Power. Before than my life was one continuous search for that "Perfect" diet or exercise program that would let ME be perfect.

    I want to read this book! Thank you! Anyone who has not worked the steps can't understand and anyone who has won't usually comment.
  • Last2bfirst
    Last2bfirst Posts: 49 Member
    As a recovered addict and alcoholic (26 years now by Gods Grace) I must point out that in the very origins of the 12 steps, being AA, God specificly a faith in Christ Jesus was at the foundation. Latter it was determined to soften tha God aspect of the program to reach more and be more inclusive and appeal to the agnostic or athiest. Having said that, if you read the chapter We Agnostics in the book Alcoholics Anonymous, you will find that although your "God option" is yours to make, it does not exclude the option that you have one. In 26 years I have seen no one fail to stay sober who has relied on God for their sobriety, a few have stayed sober for periods with out God but their sobriety was not joy filled.

    Prayer, may or may not help with your addiction. But I have yet to hear anyone say I prayed so much that I got drunk or ate a wedding cake myself. So give it a try. I once heard a man say "I am not sure there is a God but I pray in case there is" .

    As for me I rely on and give all the glory for anything good in my life to Christ Jesus.
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