Dieting vs. Lifestyle Changing...what do I do???

It's the DIET industry that drives us crazy. Buy this book or that shake or the other pill and you will lose weight.

Well, I think that people can be really mean on this site (as well as other sites). I always know that going in before posting!! : )

As for diet, it really can't be a diet that cannot be maintained. If you cannot maintain your life style on your breakfast, lunch, snack, dinner, snack, exercise and water regime, then you have to "tweek" it.

Eat more protein so you are not hungry. Eat 400 calories a meal and leave a little for a nice snack. Eat less processed foods to avoid hunger.

I started with drinking water. I added cutting out bagels, i cut my cream in my coffee by half. i added walking and a weight class. I started cutting out after dinner snacking. (I went to my bed at 8:45 last night and read. otherwise, i'd be in my kitchen looking for food)

It seems like the weight you gained back could be because it was not realistic to keep up?

I don't know the whole story, but start today by taking a look at your food!!

Lifestyle change, to me, means awareness. If you are aware, you know what you are putting into your body and know its effects. Diet just describes the process of cutting calories to a deficit.

But most importantly is accountability. You have to be accountable to yourself. You lost weight, you know how to do it. You know calories and deficit. But with accountability, you have to answer to yourself the 'bad' food decisions you make. Is eating a desert going to help you, hurt you or have no significant effect? Only you can answer that. Mathematically you can figure out the answer and weight the consequences.

As for what people bullied you about... well, some people just feel the need to be right or be mean or break people down or just talk for the sake of someone listening to them.

Be true to yourself and what is right for you. Everyone else can eff off.

Lifestyle change :-) Definitely the way to go. Be realistic. Try to not feel restricted. Look at the positive things you gain from eating better the majority of the time. Allow for treats, not cheats. Set a healthy calorie goal. You'd be surprised at how high you can go and still lose weight. Replace your whites with wheats/browns. Drink more water. Little things add up

All good advice.

I'm sorry to hear that you felt so abused in your previous experience and that you got hurt. Welcome back and hopefully you have a better experience this time. What I love about calorie counting is that it doesn't tell me I can't eat anything, because I know when I've tried to be really good and restrictive on the sweets and soda that I love, I eventually fall off the wagon and binge. So the calorie counting tells me, I can have that Mountain Dew today, but I need to do the extra 15 minutes on the elliptical or whatever to make up for it. I've actually found that cutting back, I've developed less of a taste for the uber sweet stuff. I hope you can find the balance of what works for you. Just remember to set moderate goals and be patient. Loss of a pound a week is great. As you get closer to your goal, half a pound is probably pretty good. Good luck, and feel free to friend me.

For Me, the difference in a Diet vs. a Lifestyle Change is that I know what I am doing is for LIFE...also, I know I do not have to make immediate changes (small ones are the key). The key is TRANSITIONING slowly so that the Changes will "Take". I also know that if I eat outside of My chosen Plan, it is OK, because that is Normal (but NOT often).

The keys for Me: (1) Develop an initial Eating and Exercise Plan that WORKS for Me (don't be afraid to Tweak); (2) Be Patient with Myself and the Plan; (3) Change to a New Plan when I discovered that the Old Plan NO Longer worked (as I lost weight, My Body Changed and so did its Needs); (4) STAY In-tune with Your Body, LISTEN to it, The Body has its OWN Intelligence and will Clearly give you signals as to its needs. (KEEP IT SIMPLE, Eating just ain't as complicated and full of numbers as people make it out to be...if there is a Formula involved RUN!!!)

Example: I was on South Beach, Atkins, Paleo, an On and Off Vegetarian, and some of My own Concoctions before I LISTENED to My Body and just Stopped the Madness. I gave up a FEW Bad habits (drinking alcohol, and then drinking Coffee daily). These alone out of My diet Stopped Cravings...from there My sense of WELLNESS lead Me to putting Green Tea into My life; from there, I was seeing such profound RESULTS, NOT on the scale (wt loss had stalled) but in My WELL-BEING and Life and feeling GOOD, I sought out GREATER avenues of Health. Basically My FOCUS was NOW on WELLNESS/Health, NOT wt loss; this lead Me to wanting to detox, which lead Me to Juicing, which lead Me to Vegetarianism, which lead Me to Veganism. Each step of the way My only focus was about Health and Well-Being, My Body became "sacred" and I was careful what I allowed in it, My Spirit and Emotional Well-Being was utmost (if eating something AFTERWARDS made Me sad, I would NOT eat it).

Long story short, when I looked up, a year had gone by and I was 70 lbs. lighter, a Vegetarian enjoying mono-meals, raw foods (60-70%), juicing, High energy, active, healing and Healthy. I am NOW a Transitioning Muculess Vegan (emphasis on Transitioning...could take years but OHHH what a Journey!). YouTube is a GREAT Resource and place to Research!


ETA: Most everything out here is to make money...The Human Being is un-important, so YOU MUST be Important to YOU. Don't buy equipment or supplements...until YOU see what you can and WILL do, and see what your Body needs at that time. Remember: Keep your MONEY, Supplements can not be absorbed by the Body (synthetics going into a Natural Body won't ever work!) Let FOOD (Fruits/Veggies/Herbs/Spices) be your Medicine...The BODY is Tough and Resilient, it only need a little good stuff and it is equipped to MAKE what it needs! Also, MUCH of these "Theories" like Supplement/Vitamin/Proteins are just Theories!

What's "not dieting"?

For me, it's about building habits. Not going crazy with something you can't sustain.

Habits like not drinking your calories, working out consistently (but also doing things you enjoy, some at a moderate pace, that you know you can continue with). For instance, my cousin and I several years ago started walking one day a week. And baring vacations, illness, etc,,we do this every week. Walk 3-4 miles at a moderate pace. It's habit, it's stress relieving (we go outside) and it alone will not make you lose weight but lots of habits like that add up.

Try to tackle things that make you go haywire and change your habits. Go for one or two things at a time and do things that you can do forever. Good luck!

The key is TRANSITIONING slowly so that the Changes will "Take".

Yes! I think it takes what 6 weeks to create a habit? Pick one thing and make it a habit.

This doesn't work with long term strict calorie restriction necessarily, because of the hunger urge, but it works very well with behaviors. If you're running by the donut shop every other morning, and you stop doing that for 6 weeks (or you drive a different route so you don't pass it) you will be out of that habit. You can pick your biggest challenges and work on them.

Diet (capital D) = means of losing weight, at whatever cost, no matter how painful, that you do not intend to stick with once you reach your goal.

diet (little d) = a system of eating, the food you eat every day, whatever they are. I.e. way of eating

Lifestyle change = making sustainable changes to your way of eating you can live with forever, that don't leave you craving "any and all junk food". Typically this does not include persistently low calories or complete bans on any food group (I consider "junk" a food group). If you love a food, don't ban it unless you have a legitimate medical reason.

These nothing wrong with you that means you cannot "Diet". You tried it and saw how crap it is. Now try it a different way, a way you can live with.

One, diet the way most people use it is a misunderstanding. Diet is a lifestyle eating method. Like a routine, or a commute, or anything that describes a trend in your life. Bears are omnivores, that's their diet. They eat everything all year until winter when they don't eat at all because they're sleeping. Silly cute bears.

A lof of marketing uses it as if it's a short term "bust your balls" race to the finish line. I've known many people who went through this kind of behavior off and on for decades. It's all a diet, their diet is just feast or famine, fast or binge. Both sides are part of the diet.

The most important part of adjusting your diet is to be aware of your behavior. Before you even decide what works the best for you, I think the key step anyone can take is to record your habits. If that means recording calories and weight that's fine, if that means just writing down when and where you have meals and exercise, that's also fine.

The writing things down helps because you might feel anxious or cranky one day, and you can look at your record and go "hey, I did something different here and it's directly affecting my mood" or maybe it affects your weight. If you have a record of it you can have a greater awareness of your good and bad habits and adjust them accordingly. It's hard to change something you aren't aware you are doing.

I wasn't aware, for example, that moving to a more congested city cut my exercise by about 90% because the lack of quiet scenic places made me feel trapped. I've compensated by getting some cheap indoor exercise devices so I can listen to music I like or watch shows I like without feeling nervous or trapped while I'm walking around. So far I've only gained back about 10% of my old activeness but I'm slowly trending towards the positive.

I've been keeping to a calorie amount that's about -1000 deficit of my daily energy consumption to lose weight. That's because I know I don't exercise enough to lose weight just by eating normal. I expect this to slow down when my fat% does, and I will slowly increase the amount of food I'm eating (and consequently the speed at which I lose weight) as I get closer to my goal. Theoretically I will have more energy when I'm a more healthy bodyfat percentage. I anticipate that not everything will go as I expect.

I really understand the desire to put full throttle on to lose weight. That's why recording things is important. A little voice in the back of my head is always telling me things like "If you just eat even less, you'll lose weight faster." But I have my record and data to argue with it. "Now see here, I'm losing it consistently. And these medical studies say that blablabla so not eating at all is a really bad idea"

It's normal to think like this, we get excited and impatient and irrational, thoughts arent actions, however. We just have to install personal breaks that relate to ourselves and how much we need to slow down. Some people are perfectly happy losing half a pound a week or less towards their goal, and can keep on target without feeling down. As for me I trust myself to push faster without burning out, and if I am going too slow I'll get depressed.

If other people's words can discourage you, you need to make an effort to build stronger train tracks and constantly check the rail for weaknesses, or just don't talk to people online, whichever you have to do.

I hope that the helpful people will outweigh the harmful (intentionally harmful or otherwise). Please feel free to seek encouragement and advice all you like here.

Dieting is a temporary thing. Hence your weight loss will inevitably be just that - temporary. Maybe a few years at best. Lifestyle change is just that, it's for a lifetime of health and fitness. Which do you choose?

My suggestion is to eat at a deficit (10-20% of your tdee) based on your exercise and activity level until you reach your goal.

Log and weigh with a digital scale everything you eat.

This right here is good advice.

I set a reasonable calorie range for weightloss and I like to follow the 80/20 rule : 80% of my calories I eat super healthy and clean ( unprocessed Whole grains, lean proteins, Fruits and Veggies, Low Fat Dairy) and 20% of them are treats. Sometimes it's divided by week, but most time it's divided by day ( ex - If I'm at a 1300 calorie allowance i would allow for 260 calories of splurge - like a measured out portion of ice cream or cookies or salty snack) You don't feel deprived or guilty ( because it's within your calorie count!) A lot of the time I end up just having an extra portion of something healthy because I just don't want a treat - sometimes when you give yourself permission the cravings go away.

Another thing that has helped me thus far is journalling. It can be in your food notes, a private virtual journal, or even a pretty little spiralbound one you keep with you. Write down when you are struggling and wanting to turn to food to comfort you, include what you are feeling and the circumstances that are occuring. It can help you get to the root of why you are struggling with your food issues. It takes a lot of self-reflection and it's really difficult, but it is so worth it.

Another HUUUGGGEE help for me has been finding a physical activity that I truly enjoy. I happened to fall in love with running. For you it could be Zumba, Yoga, Walking, Circuits with a Trainer, Hiking, Swimming, Kayaking or whatever. Find an activity that you enjoy and feel free to explore and switch it up. It helps with stress levels, confidence, etc.

And lastly, be patient with yourself. Learn to love yourself wherever you are in the process. This is huge - because you can lose 10, 20, 50, even 100 lbs, reach your goals and still not be satisfied with where you are.


Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Nutrition Facts For Foods

I also read a book by Josie Spinardi that talked about what I went through. The "slap back" from dieting as I call it. Turns out it's completely common to basically lose your mind with food after a good bout of dieting. But how come I can't diet anymore and other people can? Is it the impatient perfectionist personality type that counts calories and turns into a restriction monster? Why does society push people to diet so much if it's actually counterproductive? Where the heck do I go from here?

If you restrict calories you are dieting. Whether you do it for 6 weeks, 6 months, 6 years or 6 decades, it is still dieting. Call it whatever makes you happy and keeps you on track, but it is what it is.

The problem wasn't that you were dieting, it was that your diet was unsustainable. If you develop a way of eating that you can live with forever, then all you need to do when you are done is eat a little more of what you've already been eating.

Or perhaps make no changes at all. If you eat maintenance calories for your goal weight/size, then theoretically you should be able to make no changes at all for maintenance. You should simply stop losing when you get there.

To me to "diet" is to change the way I eat for a short term to meet a goal- lose weight or fit into a smaller size. But then when the goal is reached to go back to "normal" eating.
A "lifestyle change" is when you try to change the way you eat permanently. Often this MUST be less drastic than a "diet change" because you want to keep it up long term. And if not less drastic than certainly more gradual.
Quick fix diets like reducing your caloric intake drastically, or exercising every day multiple times a day (when you really don't have the drive or the time or both), diet drinks, diets where you eat only foods that are green, etc. Those types of diets rarely work because you can't keep them up long term. And when you return to your original eating habits you will end back at the original weight because nothing changed.
If you want to be healthier and weigh less and keep it up long term you must make changes you can handle long term. If you love chocolate then giving up chocolate completely forever most likely will not work. But limiting your chocolate, or balancing it with exercise will work. If you deprive yourself of things you like you are more likely to "cheat" on your diet or binge when you do allow yourself to eat those foods. But if you find a way to keep things in moderation you are more likely to succeed.
I have found that losing weight slowly means I am more likely to keep it off long term. Losing weight quickly means I usually gain it back fairly easily.