GTFIH for TheRealOrson's original limericks

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TheRealOrson
TheRealOrson Posts: 1,415 Member
in Chit-Chat
Got bored so started coming up with a few limericks which I posted on my profile.

Decided they were worth sharing here:

Enjoy!


There was a young man from LA
Who liked to swim naked each day
But when in the pool, it was often too cool
So his bits would shrivel away


There once was a beautiful gal
who frequented MyFitnessPal
she'd chat to the guys and tell them all lies
then sail on down the canal.


There was an old man from Kuwait
who wanted to find a new mate
so he took his sweet time, found a girl who was fine
because good things come to those who wait


There was an old broad from New York
who'd never seen the likes of a spork
Although, she'd seen hoards, of various swords
Especially the ones made of pork


There was a young chick from San Fran
who looked a lot like a man
so she would never go, to The Castro
without a good escape plan.




Feel free to comment or add your own (originals only)
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Replies

  • sunglasses_and_ocean_waves
    sunglasses_and_ocean_waves Posts: 2,757 Member
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    :heart: :heart: :heart: Love these! Still too early for me to be clever, so maybe later. Great job sir! :drinker:
  • Stump_Likker
    Stump_Likker Posts: 2,059 Member
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    Very nice. Mine are all dirty :)
  • mag131
    mag131 Posts: 542 Member
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    Very nice. Mine are all dirty :)

    All the best limericks are. Do share. :drinker:
  • TheRealOrson
    TheRealOrson Posts: 1,415 Member
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    Yeah....dirty limericks are not only welcomed but encouraged :D
  • Stump_Likker
    Stump_Likker Posts: 2,059 Member
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    I get in trouble on here...don't wanna push my luck :)
  • TheRealOrson
    TheRealOrson Posts: 1,415 Member
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    There was a hot babe called nutter
    Who's mind was always in the gutter
    She wouldn't post rhymes
    Cos too many times
    The mods had threatened to cut her.
  • karl39x
    karl39x Posts: 586 Member
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    Here I stand, trying to piss,
    thinking of the b*tch who gave me this.
    But, if she were here, and I was well,
    I'd catch it again, sure as hell!
  • Stump_Likker
    Stump_Likker Posts: 2,059 Member
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    There was a hot babe called nutter
    Who's mind was always in the gutter
    She wouldn't post rhymes
    Cos too many times
    The mods had threatened to cut her.


    And I have found my new MFP crush! Lol

    I'm working on one for you.
  • TheRealOrson
    TheRealOrson Posts: 1,415 Member
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    I shall eagerly await ;)
  • Stump_Likker
    Stump_Likker Posts: 2,059 Member
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    To that cute young fellow from Perth
    Who gives me my fantasies worth
    Think Australia is hot?
    You'd like what I've got
    Just head over here to my turf.

    BTW, you're my crush-in-waiting. Can't replace my main one.
  • TheRealOrson
    TheRealOrson Posts: 1,415 Member
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    To that cute young fellow from Perth
    Who gives me my fantasies worth
    Think Australia is hot?
    You'd like what I've got
    Just head over here to my turf.

    BTW, you're my crush-in-waiting. Can't replace my main one.


    That is spectacular!!!!

    Happy to wait in the wings LOL
  • TheRealOrson
    TheRealOrson Posts: 1,415 Member
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    So come on in young and old
    Don't be afraid to be bold
    This isn't a trap
    If your limerick's crap
    You sure as hell will be told ;)
  • 43932452
    43932452 Posts: 7,246 Member
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    You are awesome Orson!! Nutter, loved yours too!! :))))
  • londonboyben
    londonboyben Posts: 314 Member
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    there was a guy named paul
    he always acted a fool
    when he got drunk, he acted a punk
    and always fell off his stool

    there was a lady named flo
    who was a virgin you know
    and then one day, she gave it away
    for 9 months her belly did grow

    was going for 3 but took me ages to come up with 2 so gave up
  • TheRealOrson
    TheRealOrson Posts: 1,415 Member
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    Haha good job mate ;)
  • Gr8ChangesAhead
    Gr8ChangesAhead Posts: 836 Member
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    Hey, hey
    It's the1st of May
    Outdoor screwing starts today
  • TheRealOrson
    TheRealOrson Posts: 1,415 Member
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    Sometimes a girl needs a wax
    When the fiersome jungle attacks
    They spread it on hot
    For the feint-hearted it's not
    But it makes for more edible snacks
  • TheRealOrson
    TheRealOrson Posts: 1,415 Member
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    I really didn't think this thread
    Would end up so very dead
    It seemed a blast
    But it's failing fast
    Gonna post junk pics instead
  • 43932452
    43932452 Posts: 7,246 Member
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    Bump!! I ♥ this thread .. I haven't written rhyme in so very
    long but once I wake more I'll try and give it a shot. Please
    don't stop, Orson. :)
  • TheRealOrson
    TheRealOrson Posts: 1,415 Member
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    Oh thank-you miss N2couture
    Your heart is so very pure
    Thanks for the bump
    It made my heart jump
    For my boredom, I find this a cure.

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