parents: college savings OR other enrichment activities?

My current job (the one i got after paying for my own college education, which i make $32000 before taxes) has commented numerous times how my travels when i was younger have helped. You learn how to deal with people from all cultures, you learn customs and tolerance for others. you learn things that a history or geography book will never teach you. It gives you something you can talk about with people. I can talk to more people about my travels than about my education.

Its pretty much the same here, but we also have the oil rigs.... not sure how much people are paid tho. I think here in Alberta the minimum wage is $9.95....

You edited this, so I wanted to respond to this as well. You got your job and that acceptable paycheck because you completed school and got a degree. Did your employer have any idea when you got hired about your childhood travels? Even if they did, are you saying that going to the Martin Luther King Jr. museum when you were five years old is the reason you got your job and that paycheck?

And, again, people don't need to travel to learn to treat people with respect. They should be taught that very early by their parents or guardian, and that adult should lead by example. Traveling doesn't teach respect for other customs; a couple of days in another country only exposes you to new people and a new language, and that's hardly enough time to build tolerance or understanding for a new people or culture. White Americans and Black and brown Americans have lived together for a couple hundred years. Hundreds of years together, and still not nearly enough tolerance, respect, or understanding. I don't think it makes a difference whether you take a plane or spend a lot of money; tolerance is learned, not bought or acquired on a road trip or flight.

We talked more about my travels than my actual credentials. So yes, I do think they played a part in my job. Did the museum help? maybe, but i know that when i went to Malaysia at 15 and went to the Petronas Towers helped. I work for an international company, I saw where our offices were without knowing at that age.

Youre right, you dont. But i think it helps.

Had you gone to public or private school instead of home schooling for the majority of your grade school years, you may have a different view. Like if i was was home schooled. (I dont mean for that to sound rude!) The reason why I think you learn tolerance more when traveling is because you are being forced into their culture and to follow their customs.

why is there no option for "hookers and blow"?

That's precisely what I was thinking...

Heehee ok on a serious note, I've got some thoughts from the perspective of a current collegiate. Honestly I think you need to strike a balance. Sure I wish my folks had blown bucketloads of money on expensive trips and camps, but being able to choose almost any college in the country thanks to their savings and all the merit scholarships I'd earned was far more important to me. I would've been heartbroken had I gotten into Cornell and wasn't able to go for financial reasons.

So a few thoughts:
1) a lot of enrichment activities are not guaranteed wallet-drainers. In high school I volunteered at two hospitals, was in 3 community service clubs, did 2 sports and many other activities that lent to a killer resume and invaluable learning experiences.
2) day trips are great! My folks really drilled into our heads the value of travel and appreciation of culture. Shocker: there's a lot to be learned from our own history right here in the States. I've lived overseas so I'll admit, yes that is about as enriching as it gets, but there is a ton to be learned at nearby historical sites, national parks, and city museums.
3) no reason your kids can't chip in. I worked 2 jobs all through high school. By the time I'd finished applying to various colleges and merit scholarships, I'd written over 35 different essays. Hard work pays off. You can have your cake and eat it too! But only one slice because this is mfp:)

Moral of the story: college savings and enrichment activities are not mutually exclusive unless you make them. Which is just silly.

According to OP:

"DS flips between wanting to own a restaurant (he loves food) to wanting to be the fry guy (loves French fries) to wanting to cure cancer to being the best skier to being a ninja.
DD wants to be Taylor Swift or an engineer "like Mommy" or a Mommy or a doctor or a vet or entomologist (she freaks me out with her comfort with bugs and worms/snails, she holds them like you would hold a ladybug)"

I get the feeling we're not quite at high school level...in fact, if the one wants to be a ninja, it might still be another 7-10 years before s/he gets there, and another four years after that until college. This is why I object to sacrificing the college savings for "enrichment activities"; if the kid is that young, what is s/he actually going to learn from this that will help her/him in any way when it comes time to get a job?

You do make excellent points though. These activities don't have to be quite so expensive. Frankly, if I had that money, I'd be able to finish school and put some down on a house. I'm so broke right now that I couldn't afford to have children, let alone save for their college education. I think if the OP wants to spend that much money, she should donate to families in need of food and shelter. There are other kids on this planet who'd be glad if they could go to bed or class with a full stomach.

My current job (the one i got after paying for my own college education, which i make $32000 before taxes) has commented numerous times how my travels when i was younger have helped. You learn how to deal with people from all cultures, you learn customs and tolerance for others. you learn things that a history or geography book will never teach you. It gives you something you can talk about with people. I can talk to more people about my travels than about my education.

Its pretty much the same here, but we also have the oil rigs.... not sure how much people are paid tho. I think here in Alberta the minimum wage is $9.95....

You edited this, so I wanted to respond to this as well. You got your job and that acceptable paycheck because you completed school and got a degree. Did your employer have any idea when you got hired about your childhood travels? Even if they did, are you saying that going to the Martin Luther King Jr. museum when you were five years old is the reason you got your job and that paycheck?

And, again, people don't need to travel to learn to treat people with respect. They should be taught that very early by their parents or guardian, and that adult should lead by example. Traveling doesn't teach respect for other customs; a couple of days in another country only exposes you to new people and a new language, and that's hardly enough time to build tolerance or understanding for a new people or culture. White Americans and Black and brown Americans have lived together for a couple hundred years. Hundreds of years together, and still not nearly enough tolerance, respect, or understanding. I don't think it makes a difference whether you take a plane or spend a lot of money; tolerance is learned, not bought or acquired on a road trip or flight.

We talked more about my travels than my actual credentials. So yes, I do think they played a part in my job. Did the museum help? maybe, but i know that when i went to Malaysia at 15 and went to the Petronas Towers helped. I work for an international company, I saw where our offices were without knowing at that age.

Youre right, you dont. But i think it helps.

Had you gone to public or private school instead of home schooling for the majority of your grade school years, you may have a different view. Like if i was was home schooled. (I dont mean for that to sound rude!) The reason why I think you learn tolerance more when traveling is because you are being forced into their culture and to follow their customs.

If you work for an international company, then maybe traveling did help YOU - but how is looking at the ice caps going to help a small child become an engineer, or cure cancer, or even be a ninja? You said you went to Malaysia at 15, but we're not talking about 15-year-olds. According to OP:

"DS flips between wanting to own a restaurant (he loves food) to wanting to be the fry guy (loves French fries) to wanting to cure cancer to being the best skier to being a ninja.
DD wants to be Taylor Swift or an engineer "like Mommy" or a Mommy or a doctor or a vet or entomologist (she freaks me out with her comfort with bugs and worms/snails, she holds them like you would hold a ladybug)."

I live near Chicago, and have quite a bit of diversity in my life. I have friends who are Jamaican, Italian, Assyrian, German, Indian, Armenian, Native American, Hispanic, Polish, Russian, Ukranian, African, Australian, Canadian, Irish, and Persian. I'm Jewish, and my three best friends are Christian, Buddhist, and Muslim, and we have exchanged stories about our traditions on several occasions. Where I come from, all you need is an open mind and willingness to ask questions, and you can learn whatever you want about culture and customs. However, one can still learn about these things in classes or out of books. Is it the same as talking to people? No - but are you planning on practicing any of these things? If not, then a basic knowledge is probably good enough, and that can be learned without travel. Then again, as I mentioned, I live in a pretty diverse place; maybe that isn't the case where you live, and perhaps that contributes to why you feel travel is a necessity.

As for home school vs. public school, it again depends on the person. I have public school friends who travel, and they think it's a chore. I also have public school friends who decided to study abroad, or travel between college semesters to places that have some interest or importance to them. (And since they're older, they can appreciate these travels much better than OP's very young children.) These friends actually enjoy traveling. However, I never met a home educated child who disliked traveling, because when you're home schooled, all of these things are adventures. Still, how anyone feel about traveling is pretty much irrelevant to the overall important issue here: getting a degree is supposed to help people get jobs. You are much more likely to get a good job with a degree than a scrapbook or the vague memory of seeing the ice caps while they were still ice. Maybe travel was of importance in your career choice, but for MOST, this is not the case. I have never heard an interviewer ask, "how many places have you been to?" In the long run, getting a college education is FAR more important than paying for a young child to travel. With a good education and a good career, the children can (as adults) travel to places that actually have meaning to them.

College first!!

Thankfully we started a college savings plan on our kids first birthday. Its just like any other bill I pay each and every month.

Extra money goes towards adventures. My daughter has quite a few frequent flyer miles, unfortunately her brother has a bit of catching up to do. We also try to find things locally that many people over look. So while we may never see the Great Wall of China, my kids have island hopped the Caribbean. We have plans for more and one day it might happen. But I can assure you my kids are not deprived of the world around them. Its all about presentation.

But college was an option for me and I regret that now...I didn't finish until my late 20's. I want my kids to know that after high school is college - its the next step.

Personally, I'd say a little of both. That's what we're doing. We stash a little away for the boys in a trust fund every month...sometimes it's more, sometimes it's less...sometimes it's nothing depending on what's going on that month. The money will grow overtime with the market; if they're lucky it will substantially offset the cost of their higher education...if they're really lucky it'll pay for the whole thing.

We do that, but we also do any number of enrichment activities...many of which are in our own back yard. Everyone thinks they have to go hither and yonder for this kind of stuff...a lot can be had right at home and then embark on a big adventure every couple years or so.

We travel every 2-3 years to the UK to see my wife's family and I'm sure that will be very enriching for the boys when they become older. We also take annual trips to various National Parks in the old pop up camper...we go somewhere different every year. In New Mexico there are also numerous historic pueblos, state parks, national monuments, and other historic points of interest like White Sands Missile Range, etc...these are enrichment opportunities right here in our own back yard.

I supply my children with food and shelter. Can't really afford much else.

This.

Just in the last year, we've been able to set up savings accounts, both for the family and for the kids.

The kids each have $25 in theirs, as a starter. Any gift money they get from relatives will be split in half; half in savings, half spent on them until they each turn 5. Then they get to help decide how the money gets split/spent. At some point between 12 & 16 (i.e. when ready) they'll get their debit card and can choose without parental help.

The family has two savings accounts. One short term/emergency, in a local bank. One long term, in an e-bank, that takes a few days to get the money out of. Both of these recently got wiped out by emergency car repairs, not that there was much in them yet.

To answer the original question: Family savings, when not needed for emergencies, will be spent on travel/enrichment. The kids get to decide how they're saving for college, if they choose to go.

This content has been removed.

For other parents, if you only have some side money for either college savings OR something else (such as sleep-away-camps, travel, enrichment activities), which would you choose?

I often second-guess our decision on this matter. We're choosing the latter choice.
- Instead of reading about the Great Wall of China, we're taking the kids there.
- Going to Iceland or Alaska to see icebergs before they all melt.
- Going camping in the Grand Canyon.

But:
- A 3-week trip to Asia is like buying a small car.
- A week of summer camp at a marine biology lab is easily one month of mortgage payment.
- Don't get me started on sleep-away camp.

So instead of saving the full amount every month, we put away a pitiful amount toward college (probably won't even be enough to buy college books), and save the remainder toward an enrichment/experience.

This article made me think

---

http://www.cafemom.com/group/107447/forums/read/18824269/Influencer_Post_2?prism_id=160895&utm_medium=sem2&utm_campaign=prism&utm_source=internal&utm

Appreciate your thoughts/feedback/what did you do for your kids?
Amanda

I haven't read the whole thread, and I'm not a parent. But here's my two cents.

My parents did not start a college savings account for me. What that means for me, is that at 22 years old, I only have about 20 credits under my belt towards my degree. I have to pay my own way through school, with no help from anyone. I've been working full time since I was 17.

Am I upset about it? Nope. I used to resent the fact that they did not save up for me, but I realize now that I'm glad they didn't. Because they chose to spend money on enrichment activities, I had a very fullfilling dance and softball "careers", I've been to Mexico several times, Australia, New Zealand, Jamaica, Italy, Spain, France and I've traveled a lot within the US itself. Those experiences were amazing, and something not everyone will ever have the chance to do. Plus, having to pay my way through school instills a sense of financial responsibility for me. I wouldn't trade in my cultural experiences for a college fund.

This content has been removed.

both

I've only read some of the responses, but one that strikes me the most is from a 22 year old who is wishing that her parents had paid for college insted of giving her experiences that she's since forgotten. I was you 19 years ago and I can honestly say that I am so glad now that I have the memories (even if they are vague) of everything I did with my family as a child. Those memories will last so much longer than your student loan debt and are worth so much more. That's what we're giving to our kids and I fully expect that they won't always appreciate it at the time, but at some point in their future they'll look back and remember and smile at the memory. Remember, the future is not guaranteed.

That being said, we will help our kids with restrictions. We will counsel them that spending hundreds of thousands of dollars on a fancy private school will earn you the same degree as the state school down the road. We will put a limit on the amount given to them and we will stick to it. The balance will be their responsibility. They must graduate from whatever program they choose to earn any of our help, if they don't the full amount due will be their responsibility. I truly believe that you must have skin in the game to appreciate the value of a good education.

I didn't get a dime for college, nor did I experience "enrichment" activities. Never went to summer camp, never travelled to cool places (with the exception of visiting family). I have a huge amount of student loan debt that I'm terrified of, but I turned out okay, I think.

"but here in the states, people who can't afford to finish school have two options: construction work, or food service - and even then, I think many construction jobs require an AA."

I'm a food service professional...a classically trained chef with an AA in Culinary Arts and a BA in Hospitality Management. I realize that most people feel as though food service is an industry dominated by high school dropouts and those that can't cut it in the real world, but I assure you, by and large, that isn't the case.

There are many, many more jobs that are available to people who don't go to college. Warehouse, factory, military, janitorial, etc.

Unfortunately it seems as though kids think they have to have a fancy degree and a six figure income to be a productive member of society. What's happened to having pride in your work (whatever you do), working hard, and living within your means? Being happy isn't a direct result of having a high powered white collar job and tons of money (or debt). I tell my kids often that I'd dig ditches if I had to and that there's no shame in any job as long as you do it well.

It is ironic that people use Jobs and Gates as examples against college education. Both of them, as well as others in the same boat, are few and far between. They also knew the value of college education and most strictly hired college educated workers from the highest rated institutions.

For most individuals, college *is* a huge compliment to a good skill set, making them more marketable in industry. Most corporations will send top execs to finish Masters degrees before promoting them to higher positions. Engineers, including most of those who work on Internet related services (network, chip makers, cell phones, and pretty much most technology advances), are college degree professionals. Doctors....lawyers...you name it.

Now, many trades and such can go through career and technical education in high school or a two year college and do just fine. They can own businesses themselves and do even better. So a degree is NOT the be-all/end-all as far as "success" is concerned.

This content has been removed.