Things People Say When You've Lost Weight

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  • dunnodunno
    dunnodunno Posts: 2,290 Member
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    It really bugs me when I am at work or with friends and I get comments like "You're wasting away!" and "You don't need to lose anymore weight, you look good". I know they are trying to be supportive, but it really irritates me. I am only half way to my goal, I am still considered obese, and telling me to stop is the opposite of being helpful.

    *rantover*

    Anyone else get stupid comments from people trying to "help"?

    What irritates me the most is when people act shocked that I still want to lose more weight. I always tell them that I am still 183 pounds & at least want to get down to 140-150. I don't know if they think I am starving myself or what? I think some of them think that I weigh way less than I do, but still it can get annoying.
  • ptjbaker
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    mouth filters. I like that!
  • PeteWhoLikesToRunAlot
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    My parents (who are morbidly obese) look at me at a normal weight and say the same stuff. It drives me crazy.
  • ptjbaker
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    So,.....what IS your secret?:tongue:
  • Lol
  • sweetpea6218
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    I don't know if this counts or not... but I moved away for a year and lost a lot of weight.. so when I came back, neither one of my parents recognized me. They thought I was one of my sisters friends and took a good while to figure out that it was me. lol
  • hjpate
    hjpate Posts: 11 Member
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    I'm not one to fret over what other people think of my weight loss. I'm doing it for me and my future (which includes my family, friends and at least some of the people who comment).

    When I reach my goal weight (roughly 50-55%) of my starting weight, I will tell people I am not half the woman I used to be...I am now a double CONCENTRATED package of the woman I always was.

    :bigsmile:
  • dnamouse
    dnamouse Posts: 612 Member
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    I haven't had too many comments. A friend jokingly said the other day that if I turned sideways she wouldn't be able to see me ;) It was meant as a joke and I took it as such - she's seen me demolish half a pizza in a sitting (plus garlic bread and wine lol) and knows how hard I work.

    Other than a shocked and quickly muted gasp from my MIL, that's about it ;) My Mum was concerned, but she's since stayed with us and seen how much I eat and workout, so she's happy that I'm doing it right.
  • AABru
    AABru Posts: 610 Member
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    The last person that made a comment about how I looked was told "I'm sorry, do I know you well enough for you to say that?" She blushed and hasn't talked to me since. Even my doctor told me "You're done. anymore weight you lose is for vanity." Ummmm...I'm still 15 pounds AT LEAST over (I'm 5'7" and 180). I wouldn't necessarily call them vanity pounds, but preventing mid-life health issue pounds.
  • SkinnyWannabeGal
    SkinnyWannabeGal Posts: 143 Member
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    Actual conversation:

    "Whoa, you lost weight. You look SO much better."

    "Thanks, I was really sick for a long time and very scared for my health."

    "Well not sick enough. You still have a long ways to go."

    I had my family AND my boss say this to me when I was once very sick for a few months. Thanks for the support guys! Lol
  • aszwarc
    aszwarc Posts: 200 Member
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    You are 100% of the Ann you use to be.
    Losing weight and getting healthy, does not mean losing yourself.

    ...
    My daughter is 3 months in from have Gastric By pass and has moved quickly, but is afraid of hitting a
    plateau. She needs some light, fun comebacks, so she can enjoy the ride.
    Aw, thanks. :heart:

    And I don't know what actress it was, but someone was being interviewed by Oprah. The conversation turned to the actress' weight loss, and Oprah kept pressing for a concrete number. Her response was, "The number isn't important." I love this, but like my other canned response, I'm usually too taken aback to remember it.

    Though the snarky side of me wants to respond with something like, "More than you have."
  • sbrownallison
    sbrownallison Posts: 314 Member
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    Yes, people do want a magic answer, so they ask "How did you do it?". I tell those who ask, "Sadly, the answer is very boring: A healthy diet and exercise!"
  • qtgonewild
    qtgonewild Posts: 1,930 Member
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    my thing is a lot of people ask me at work, what site I use, because they know I do. so I tell them, they log on and never log on again. I tell them it only works if you work it. it's not going to work itself.
  • jensterfer
    jensterfer Posts: 7 Member
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    A gentleman that I used to work with said that he noticed I'd been losing weight but didn't want to say anything in case I had cancer. :noway:

    When I lost weight the first time I worked in a mall. I'd been running, lifting weights, eating at a deficit, etc. I heard through the mall grapevine that the manager at the GNC was telling people that he'd sold me diet pills and that was the reason that I'd lost weight. :explode: I haven't shopped at a GNC since. :laugh:
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,741 Member
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    Totally agree with the above - it's a strange phenomenon! I think it can come from not only a place of jealousy, but also friends and family worry that if you change so dramatically on the outside, you won't be the same person on the inside.

    I remember when I was a kid my mum lost a tonne of weight. Everyone was complimenting her and congratulating her...but I hated it, I felt like she wasn't the same mum I had known my whole life! She looked different, dressed differently and had a new air of confidence which meant she acted a little differently too. I was only 9 or so, so didn't really "get it", but it makes me see where that kind of behaviour comes from.

    I understand this too! For me it was in the form of friends who felt ugly/fat/gross and then got thin and started dressing provocatively and chasing unattainable boys and making horrible decisions. This happened a lot during college. Most of those girls got there through unhealthy methods, but I missed my "old" friends!!
  • sweetpea129
    sweetpea129 Posts: 755 Member
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    Oh goodness, I hate when people tell me that i'm "wasting away" or that i "need to stop now". Its so rude. I know a lot of it stems from their own insecurities but I do think some of it is just because they aren't use to seeing me at a normal weight.

    Worst comment was from a friends boyfriend who told her "Don't believe her, Casey, she definitely did some drugs no matter what she tells you." Uhhh, okay then.
  • amandatapar
    amandatapar Posts: 246 Member
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    I get that too. I have 23 pounds to go and people say I am going to blow away if I don't stop losing weight. I am 5' 8'' and only weigh 163 right now. I'm pretty sure I won't blow away at that weight. I just don't let it get to me. They have only known me heavy. They have never met the small me. But my husband even said he didn't think I needed to lose much more as well. I don't think people mean too much by it, it is just a opinion.
  • iquiltoo
    iquiltoo Posts: 246 Member
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    I haven't got to that point yet, but I have had two friends tell me that to get to what would be a normal weight for someone my height (depending on the chart, it's 100 to 150 lbs! so 125 isn't unreasonable!) I would be far too thin! One of them even told me that when she was younger, she was about 120 and she was in really good shape... uh, she's two or three inches taller than me, go figure. I pointed that out to her and she did allow as how maybe that wouldn't be so bad then. The other person was formerly a nurse, and she's four or five inches taller than me, so I really don't get how she thinks that's too low. She must really not be taking into account the fact that I am that much shorter. People just have NO concept of what a healthy weight looks like any more. They also don't really know just how much people really do weigh according to what they look like. I have gotten a couple of friends to tell me what they thought I weighed, and they were way low, bless 'em!

    On the side of people saying or not saying anything about my weight loss, a male friend who knows I am going to the gym and working hard, mentioned to a mutual male friend (one of my best-friends-that's-like-a-sister's husband) that he thought I was losing and didn't know if he should say anything! The husband (who is like a brother to me too!) encouraged him to but he still didn't feel comfortable about it until I told him I had lost 40 lbs (he had been away for a month and asked what was new.)

    As far as people asking for numbers, I have said to one person "I'll let you know when I get there!" Not to be rude, but I didn't really want to tell her, and certainly not in a room with others present. And when asked what weight I want to get to, partly because of my two above noted friends, I usually say I am not sure yet, I will have to decide when I get a lot closer. Luckily, I haven't had any people who have pressed me because I am storing up some of your replies in case they do! LOL! Not really... I am like most of you, usually too astonished when people are that pushy and can't think of my perfect replies.
  • lithezebra
    lithezebra Posts: 3,670 Member
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    It really bugs me when I am at work or with friends and I get comments like "You're wasting away!" and "You don't need to lose anymore weight, you look good". I know they are trying to be supportive, but it really irritates me. I am only half way to my goal, I am still considered obese, and telling me to stop is the opposite of being helpful.

    *rantover*

    Anyone else get stupid comments from people trying to "help"?

    Would you like it better if they said you look like you're about halfway to your goal? I'd just take the compliment and not worry about it.
  • mike_ny
    mike_ny Posts: 351 Member
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    The "What's your secret?" really bugs me too. When I tell them that it was cutting back on calories, eating healthier, and exercising, they're totally disappointed and change the subject or move on. Everybody wants a magic pill that works overnight with no changes in their eating habits or activity level.

    If I played along and told them the secret is Greek yogurt, along with cutting back on calories, eating healthier, and exercising,
    then they'd just hear the yogurt part and add it to their sucky diet and sedentary lifestyle and wonder why that alone wasn't working miracles for them. They'd be eating a quart a day figuring the more they ate, the faster they'd lose the weight. People hear what they want and the commitment and effort required to get fit clearly isn't what they want to hear.
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