Why does everyone seem to be doing better then me?

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  • shepd1999
    shepd1999 Posts: 40 Member
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    This is not a spirnt but a marathon. Losing 24 in two months is a 3lb per week average. I personally think that is awesome progress. I think we all go through that feeling of wanting people to notice. The only thing is are you doing this for people to notice or are you doing for your personal health. I have myself thinking long as I see a loss on the scale at the end of the week it is a win. And like any War it takes many small victories to win the end fight.
  • ladymiseryali
    ladymiseryali Posts: 2,555 Member
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    because you keep *****ing and keep making excuses

    In the words of Wil Wheaton....

    Don't be a d!ck.
  • Fragilebird24
    Fragilebird24 Posts: 202 Member
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    I know it can really be frustrating but honestly the only person you should compare yourself to is the person you were yesterday. Just keep you head down and keep working, there will plenty of time to compare results after you have reached your goal. Until then, you are still in the fight so stay focused.

    GREAT advice!
  • goalss4nika
    goalss4nika Posts: 529 Member
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    I'm very unmotivated at the moment. I've lost 24 pounds in two months and not only am I feeling unaccomplished, especially considering that on this websites' home page they have people boasting (rightfully so) that they have lost twice as much as me in the same amout of time, but also in the fact that no one has noticed. I understand that it's only important for me to notice the difference, but it's disheartening to think that I could gain 24 pounds right now and no one would notice that either. I just wonder if people will only see me as "fat".

    I know this is a bit of a pity party, I guess I'm just reminding myself to keep at it, "It's not a sprint, it's a marathon." Anyway, any stories of how you seem to stay with it would be greatly appreciated.


    WOW! 24lbs in 2 months is alot. Congrats on your success. I can totally understand your frustration. But stick with it! It will be worth it in the end
  • goalss4nika
    goalss4nika Posts: 529 Member
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    I know it can really be frustrating but honestly the only person you should compare yourself to is the person you were yesterday. Just keep you head down and keep working, there will plenty of time to compare results after you have reached your goal. Until then, you are still in the fight so stay focused.

    GREAT advice!


    I love this! I have to tell myself this
  • maryhannold
    maryhannold Posts: 37 Member
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    What I wouldn't give to lose 24 lbs. in just 2 months! You must have a GREAT metabolism!

    I couldn't see your food diary, but I hope you are at a good calorie count on a daily basis, as well as adding in a bit of cardio AND some strength training. Spark People has a great "do at your desk 15 min. workout".

    If you are seeing a slow down, that is normal. You may want to check out the JJ Virgin book "The Virgin Diet". It talks about eliminating and identifying "inflammatory foods", helping you find which ones are inflammortory to you!

    Good Luck on your journey to health!
  • Fragilebird24
    Fragilebird24 Posts: 202 Member
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    24 pounds in 2 months is INCREDIBLE. I've lost 23 pounds so far and I started halfway through June! Keep your head up because you ARE doing excellent.
  • ElizabethObviously
    ElizabethObviously Posts: 380 Member
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    Different things work for different people. My brother has lost about 100 pounds in 3 months. I am proud of him. But I also know what effort he has put into it.

    The thing is....stop focusing on other people and what they are doing. You have lost 4 gallons of milk from your body. Go to the store and hold 4 gallons and milk....It is ALOT of weight. You are doing great!

    Try to focus on the non scale things also. Are your clothes any looser? Do you sleep better? Can you walk or run further? What you need to do is STOP looking at the scale. Do not get on it for 1 month but in that month eat clean....nothing processed.....and work out until your shirt changes color from sweat. I can guarantee at the end of that month you will have lost weight.
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,742 Member
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    Honestly that attitude is one of the reasons I never even tried, in the past. I felt like, "20 lb is nothing when you're at my weight so why bother?" when my 140 lb coworkers lost 20 lb and everyone was commending them on wearing a tiny frock...that's disheartening when you're larger.

    Also, you may have a naturally competitive spirit...I do. I'm not that ambitious and I am an introvert, but I also have a very competitive and perfectionist side to me. That makes it difficult to not be the best, fastest, etc, at whatever it is I set my mind to. In fact, one of the MAIN things that got me interested in starting MFP was finding out my fiancé's best friend (a guy) lost 60 lb when he went pescetarian, and I only lost 9 lb when I did. I felt like I was an underachiever or something, and it made me want to lose more weight.

    It's taken me 6 months to lose 44 lb. I am totally fine with that. 1.6 lb per week is a good loss. If you lose weight too quickly, there's always that chance that you will put it right back on...and some on here have claimed that your appearance can change in ways you don't like if the weight comes off super fast. So take that for what it is worth...

    Just TRY to focus on your own goals and don't worry about others. I know it's hard!!!
  • niricava
    niricava Posts: 89 Member
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    Way to go on losing 24 lbs in 2 months. That's incredible! I wish I could have lost mine that fast... but everyone is different.

    The only one you should compare yourself to is yourself. You know what you've gone through to get there and how far you want to go. You should be proud of that.

    Start taking photos of yourself. I did not take one when I was at my heaviest but now I wish I did since I am not seeing the difference in myself but I do see it in what clothes I can now wear and NOT wear (since they are falling off :happy: ).

    I bet we all wish the weight would come off our middles first or whatever part bothers us the most, but it doesn't. Our bodies drop the weight from wherever they wanted. Mine hid my weight well...but that means it hid the weight loss too :tongue:
  • c14hrissy
    c14hrissy Posts: 5 Member
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    WOW congrats on your loss!... I sometimes feel that I work so hard.. and get nowhere.. and if we could only remember JUST KEEP GOING!..... I think we always focus too much on the scale... when really we are making a difference in our everyday health!... keep going! :happy:
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,874 Member
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    ?? that is almost 3lbs/week, most people just aim for 1-2 lbs/week, so not sure why you are thinking this

    ^^^this...your expectations are jacked OP. I lost 40 Lbs over about a 6-7 month period. Get your expectations in line with reality.
  • highervibes
    highervibes Posts: 2,219 Member
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    ?? that is almost 3lbs/week, most people just aim for 1-2 lbs/week, so not sure why you are thinking this

    ^^^this...your expectations are jacked OP. I lost 40 Lbs over about a 6-7 month period. Get your expectations in line with reality.

    +1000
  • WhitneyW78
    WhitneyW78 Posts: 186 Member
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    Reality check... 24 pounds in TWO MONTHS is 3 pounds a week. That is freaking amazing! The recommended is 1 pound a week, so I'd say you are kicking butt. Slow and steady wins the race.
  • soupandcookies
    soupandcookies Posts: 212 Member
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    Wait - there are people on the homepage that say they've lost 48 pounds in 2 months? Like, 6 pounds a week? Are you sure about that?
  • Naener
    Naener Posts: 167 Member
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    are you eating ENOUGH and working out?? if youre just starving yourself you could have lost 24 pounds an an unhealthy way... and it wont look very good on you... skin kinda hangs, and the body eats at muscle tissue rather than the fat when you arent eating enough!

    i lost 20 pounds in 2.5 months once... and it was because i was severely depressed and not eating.. and in consiquence, my immune system tanked and i got VERY ill. of course i gained that weight back over time, and finally got it off again just this year...

    you are not comparible to anyone else... noone else is YOU. your journey and your marathon is your own... you shouldnt look at how fast others seem to lose... their numbers dont mean a thing to yours! 24 pounds is a GREAT success!! keep it up!!

    in two months from june to august, working out 5 days a week and eating between 1330-1700 calories, i lost 10 pounds....
    everyone is different... dont give up!
  • Koldnomore
    Koldnomore Posts: 1,613 Member
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    The rate at which you lose is going to depend very heavily on how much weight you have to lose in the first place. If you have a lot to lose you will lose much faster than someone who does not. Losing 12 lbs a month is something that I could NEVER do at my current weight, but when I was starting on MFP at 228 lbs I lost close to 25 lbs in 2 months. My friend hit 60 lbs lost almost in the blink of an eye because he started at over 300. You absolutely can not compare your rate to anyone else unless they have exactly the same weight, height, age, medical background, activity profile etc etc etc...

    If you think you are losing slow now just wait until you only have 30 lbs to get to your goal and you will be ecstatic if you lose 2 lbs a MONTH. You need a reality check. You did not gain weight over night and you will not lose 100 lbs in 4 months in any kind of healthy sustainable way UNLESS you start out weighing 500 lbs because for someone with that much to lose the goal IS very realistic. If you are needing to lose a total of 100 or so lbs you need to be prepared for it to take close to 2 YEARS if you intend to keep it off for the rest of your life. If you expect quick fat loss you are in the wrong place.
  • happysherri
    happysherri Posts: 1,360 Member
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    Sounds normal, everyone gets discouraged at times. We always hear about the good stories but rarely hear or see the bad times or gains. But it happens to just about everyone.

    I've joined groups and challenges on here and am very competitive (mostly with myself), I hate the thought of others seeing me fail or me failing myself. So I try and meet the weekly goals I set.


    Sounds like you are sticking with it and that's great. Hang in there!

    Ps - I hate the scale/weight loss challenges (I only have about 8 lbs to lose so wouldn't do me any good.) I love the non-scale challenges!
  • sarahrbraun
    sarahrbraun Posts: 2,261 Member
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    I'm very unmotivated at the moment. I've lost 24 pounds in two months and not only am I feeling unaccomplished, especially considering that on this websites' home page they have people boasting (rightfully so) that they have lost twice as much as me in the same amout of time, but also in the fact that no one has noticed. I understand that it's only important for me to notice the difference, but it's disheartening to think that I could gain 24 pounds right now and no one would notice that either. I just wonder if people will only see me as "fat".

    I know this is a bit of a pity party, I guess I'm just reminding myself to keep at it, "It's not a sprint, it's a marathon." Anyway, any stories of how you seem to stay with it would be greatly appreciated.

    Do NOT let the scale be what validates you. I have been trying to lose weight and get into shape for almost 2 YEARS and have only lost 37 of the 83 lbs I have to lose. I have only lost 3lbs this year. I have been wearing the same size for 18 months...they just fit better.

    NSVs are what validates me. I have amazing legs. I have added 50lbs to my squat weight ( I can squat 150#). I can do things that some GUYS in the gym cannot do. I used to be able to run 4mph for 2 minutes...now I can run 5mph for 5 minutes. I used to chest press 15 lbs...now I can bicep curl 15 lbs.
  • Daerina8
    Daerina8 Posts: 35 Member
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    Different diets give different results for different people :) we are all unique, we all have different metabolisms and weight loss "styles". Those with more to lose and/or make the most drastic lifestyle changes are more likely to lose it quicker.

    BUT keep in mind that losing weight too quickly can leave you with a couple of nasty side effects, one being that it's much easier to put it back on, the other is that your skin won't necessarily "shrink" to fit your new bodyshape so easily or quickly, and you may end up with loose, saggy skin and even "folds". 24lbs in 2 months is amazing! Ideally you should lose at most 2-3 lbs per week to lose weight healthily and to give your skin adequate time to adjust to your body changes. :)

    ALSO keep in mind (mainly if you're incorporating exercise into your weight loss plan) that muscle weighs more than fat, and the scale is not the only way to tell if you're getting more healthy or not! You can lose inches around your waist and still gain weight if you're building enough muscle.