Seriously, how can I look like this

My stomach is SERIOUSLY bigger than the rest of my body. The rest of me is actually alright except my huge belly! I don't drink, I don't eat much sugar (well in the last week I have because I feel so horrible, if I eat healthily and look like this I may as well eat rubbish and enjoy it), normally just a healthy diet with lots of fruit and veg! No allergies, not on my period (when I am it gets worse) and NOT pregnant thank you (I have been told this many times, my mum being one of those people. I'm not) what do I do?

EDIT I don't know how to post pictures otherwise I will! For now if you look in my pictures it is there - no idea why it's upside down but whatever
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Replies

  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    It's likely where your body just likes to keep extra fat. Everyone's is different. Mine is in my love handles.

    Eat at a caloric deficit and start working out with a combination of weight training and cardio. You should end up losing fat and thus, your stomach will get smaller.

    Edit: Sounded like a caveman.
  • cupcakekate28
    cupcakekate28 Posts: 31 Member
    But you haven't seen me yet. I am HUGE! I genuinely look 5 months pregnant no joke. I hate myself so much
  • shell_mc
    shell_mc Posts: 109 Member
    Have you been to your gyno? Sometimes problems in the female reproductive system can cause abdominal bloating. I'd schedule an appointment, just to be on the safe side.
  • I_Will_End_You
    I_Will_End_You Posts: 4,397 Member
    But you haven't seen me yet. I am HUGE! I genuinely look 5 months pregnant no joke. I hate myself so much

    I looked at your picture. I would give you the following advice:

    It's likely where your body just likes to keep extra fat. Everyone's is different. Mine is in my love handles.

    Eat at a caloric deficit and start working out with a combination of weight training and cardio. You should end up losing fat and thus, your stomach will get smaller.
  • cupcakekate28
    cupcakekate28 Posts: 31 Member
    Have you been to your gyno? Sometimes problems in the female reproductive system can cause abdominal bloating. I'd schedule an appointment, just to be on the safe side.

    Hmm, nobody has ever suggested this! Thanks I will!:)
  • Mokey41
    Mokey41 Posts: 5,769 Member
    I've always had a belly. I have pictures of myself at about 6 years old in my ballet class with a belly. Scrawny little kid with stick legs and a belly. I know part of it is my posture because if I really think about it and tuck my butt in my belly goes away sort of.

    The only thing I can recommend if you are at an ideal weight is to do lots of core exercise to make the most of your abdominal muscles.
  • kr1stadee
    kr1stadee Posts: 1,774 Member
    Could be posture, could be a wheat intolerance/lactose intolerance, you could just need to strength train and preserve muscle while eating at a slight deficit... You are 100% sure you aren't pregnant, right? (I'm sorry, I've been asked too and it hurts)... make sure you take a test, to be sure.

    Maybe a trip to see your doctor? Does your belly have "triggers"? Any time you eat something specific, is your belly bigger?
    Log it, and maybe eliminate those triggers?

    Definitely do not hate yourself, you are young and beautiful.
  • Nonya81
    Nonya81 Posts: 145 Member
    I cant give you any advice but I can relate because I have the same problem and cant seem to get rid of my belly fat.
  • maggie16sweetxoxo
    maggie16sweetxoxo Posts: 314 Member
    It's just your body type. I have a huge butt, legs, and arms, but smaller torso. It's just because of who our ancestors are! You're beautiful.
  • narwhalpr
    narwhalpr Posts: 65 Member
    I would go to the doctor, just to rule out any medical issues.
  • I am the same way, my belly was flat and tight even after 3 kids, then all of the sudden once I hit 39, I have been to many Dr.s about it (I'm skinny everywhere else) and they all say it's my age once a woman hits 40, how old are you? Oh and I would go to the Dr. to make sure nothing is wrong.
  • cupcakekate28
    cupcakekate28 Posts: 31 Member
    I am the same way, my belly was flat and tight even after 3 kids, then all of the sudden once I hit 39, I have been to many Dr.s about it (I'm skinny everywhere else) and they all say it's my age once a woman hits 40, how old are you? Oh and I would go to the Dr. to make sure nothing is wrong.

    I'm 19:( and I did go to her and she told me people are fat because they eat too much and kept asking me to do a chlamydia test. I haven't been back
  • cafeaulait7
    cafeaulait7 Posts: 2,459 Member
    I have a friend who is completely slender but can get a big belly when she puts on weight :) The rest of her stays the exact same and just her front grows.

    I have a lower belly issue myself, but my thighs get bigger, etc, too (not at the same rate, but they do). At one certain weight range, I do look pregnant because of the lower belly pooch, and I've had a clerk congratulate me and ask how far along I was, lol.

    When my pal loses weight, her belly just goes away, btw. That's the only thing that ever changes. It's cute! When she's up in weight a bit, she wears a lot of jeans that show off her butt or short shorts ;) Work what you've got!
  • Joanne_happygramma
    Joanne_happygramma Posts: 207 Member
    Definitely get to a good gyno and get it checked out -- my friend and her sister both have fybroid cysts that make them look pregnant - although slender everywhere else. Always best to rule these things out before working on cores etc.
  • cupcakekate28
    cupcakekate28 Posts: 31 Member
    I was kind of hoping I WAS pregnant because at least that would be an answer!! But I just had my period and this has been a problem for years so no :(
  • maguariento
    maguariento Posts: 72 Member
    Ditto on the gyno. Need to rule that out, AND make sure there are no problems. If you get a clear checkup, time to concentrate on fat loss. Yes, it's possible to store "all" your fat there (at least at first!). It could also be water retention or gas... So possibly a food allergy? At any rate, it may be time to reduce your BMI, if you're in/above the "normal" range. Good luck!!
  • bmqbonnie
    bmqbonnie Posts: 836 Member
    I'm the same as some PPs that have had a big belly literally since toddlerhood. I don't think I'll ever have a tiny waist with washboard abs, but it does shrink some. Just gotta keep plugging away. Spot reducing isn't really possible but the stomach is more prone to bloat than other areas. Keep sodium low and drink a lot of water. Some people find that wheat or dairy makes them bloat more.

    Do be sure your posture is good. Practice sort of sucking it in all the time. It will obviously look better but also helps strengthen some muscles that will help it look good more permanently.

    I am with you though. I know women supposedly don't bulk up, but I still find myself a little frightened of doing really ab heavy work. I focus more on core stabilizing exercises like planks, pilates stuff, etc. I don't really know if I'm on the right track there :frown: But my waist certainly doesn't need anymore thickening. Other than that I'm all about strength training everything else.
  • Holly_Roman_Empire
    Holly_Roman_Empire Posts: 4,440 Member
    I was kind of hoping I WAS pregnant because at least that would be an answer!! But I just had my period and this has been a problem for years so no :(

    Please tell me you're joking.
  • chandanista
    chandanista Posts: 986 Member
    I have a coworker who has a butt and legs I would kill for, but she carries her extra weight in her belly. It's just how some people are built. Only way to cut down on body fat, wherever it is located, is a calorie deficit, preferably with some form of exercise, and wait it out.
  • wibutterflymagic
    wibutterflymagic Posts: 788 Member
    I understand you are you are young but to say you hate yourself is not productive and acutally a very destructive mentality to have. There is nothing to hate about the way you look. No one is perfect and the sooner you realize that the better your journey will be. Everyone has different body types and we all store fat in different ways. I have a belly and always have. Mine however looks like someone took a balloon and tied a string in the middle. I have the fat above and below my belly button. Even when I was 130lbs I thought I was super fat because my belly would pop out above my waistband.

    Try working with weights. I don't mean these little girly pink weights, I mean real weights. As you start to work your abs you will find that you will begin to subconsciencely suck in your gut all the time which helps make you look thinner but also works the muscles too.

    Amazingly women still think as soon as they start lifting they are going to look like a body builder. This is the farthest from reality you can get. The only way to "bulk' up and look like a body builder is to completely change your lifestyle and add suplements. Women just are not made the way men are with regards to muscle development. By working with weights you will lose the fat and will have better muscle tone.....which is what all women say they want.
  • Melissa22G
    Melissa22G Posts: 847 Member
    I was kind of hoping I WAS pregnant because at least that would be an answer!! But I just had my period and this has been a problem for years so no :(

    :noway:
  • Lauren8239
    Lauren8239 Posts: 1,039 Member
    I am the same way, my belly was flat and tight even after 3 kids, then all of the sudden once I hit 39, I have been to many Dr.s about it (I'm skinny everywhere else) and they all say it's my age once a woman hits 40, how old are you? Oh and I would go to the Dr. to make sure nothing is wrong.

    I'm 19:( and I did go to her and she told me people are fat because they eat too much and kept asking me to do a chlamydia test. I haven't been back


    .... and why would your doctor feel the need to do that test?
  • laylaness
    laylaness Posts: 262 Member
    I am the same way, my belly was flat and tight even after 3 kids, then all of the sudden once I hit 39, I have been to many Dr.s about it (I'm skinny everywhere else) and they all say it's my age once a woman hits 40, how old are you? Oh and I would go to the Dr. to make sure nothing is wrong.

    I'm 19:( and I did go to her and she told me people are fat because they eat too much and kept asking me to do a chlamydia test. I haven't been back

    This is not meant in a mean way, I promise, but she's right.

    I carry most of my extra weight in my belly and thighs. You just gotta keep going. Eat at a deficit, maybe lift weights for some body recomposition. Measure and track what you eat honestly.

    Also, maybe get the STD tests she recommends, just in case -- make sure you're healthy.
  • jaimrlx
    jaimrlx Posts: 426 Member
    I have PCOS and this is d*mn near the only place I really carry weight. Have been asked if I'm pregnant more than 3x in the last 5 years, and am the butt of jokes when I am and am not around. It's annoying, but I know how you feel. Something to get checked out.
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
    But you haven't seen me yet. I am HUGE! I genuinely look 5 months pregnant no joke. I hate myself so much

    I do agree with you. You look more distended than fat. Have you seen a doctor?
  • twinketta
    twinketta Posts: 2,130 Member
    Something to consider is `no added sugar` drinks.

    I bloat beyond belief if I drink anything that has the additives that are in these types of drinks.

    So I just stick to water.
  • Symonep
    Symonep Posts: 181 Member
    definitely look into some kind of wheat/gluten intolerance
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
    I remember I worked with a guy like this. He used to joke about maybe it was a beer belly but it turned out it was a tumor. It was really sad because it was terminal and he had a 5 year old daughter.

    Maybe check with a doctor in case it is something medically serious.
  • iamanadult
    iamanadult Posts: 709 Member
    Click your heels three times and say the magic words!
  • naiauhane
    naiauhane Posts: 15 Member
    I know it's hard not to get upset about not looking the way you think you should. Many of us struggle with trying to feel beautiful and comfortable as is. I have weight I'd like to lose, but I've shifted my focus from losing pounds to gaining strength and feeling good about myself. I know when I take my dogs for regular walks, go to the dance classes I love, even lift free weights (which I recently learned I love), that my body starts to feel great, even if I still look the same outside. I feel more confident, sexier, happier, and my body AND MIND start craving that exercise activity. I don't spend hours in a gym, in fact I hate going to gyms and know it's a waste of money if I join one. I walk my dogs at a brisk pace, but still let them stop and smell things because it's their walk as much as mine. When I lift weights, it's only a 30-minute routine 3x per week that I enjoy. My dance classes are the longest/most involved workout I like to do, but even those I don't go to often because it's expensive (and in reality, I haven't been to a class in months because I can't afford it right now).

    Giving all those details isn't to say, "look how great I'm doing," because the truth is I fell off the wagon a couple months ago and need to start exercising again. In the time when I'm not active, I start to get down on myself, I don't feel as confident, and I get too fixated on my flaws. So I guess what I'm really saying is, find something that you enjoy and makes you confident, whether it's exercise or another hobby (although I think exercise comes with the added bonus of endorphins that help you feel good). When you find something you love to do, it makes you feel good about yourself. If you find the right type of exercise, it's possible to have that as something you love to do. Honestly, it's taken me a decade to really figure out what motivates me to be active, and I was really surprised by how much I like to lift weights when I previously found the free weight area in the gym to be intimidating. Granted I'm lucky to have a free weight set at home now because as previously stated, I really don't like the gym. I think it's boring and if I pay for a membership, I just waste my money. I don't think exercise should be a grind or boring, otherwise you're just wasting time feeling miserable.

    The other thing to think about is that you're still young and anything you can do now to make yourself feel good and be confident is only going to help you going forward. You have so much yet to come, including hormone and body changes. Getting hung up on something now to the point of getting down on yourself is only going to make it harder to overcome any future changes that you might also view as a negative. But if you can learn to be comfortable with who you are now, you'll find that any future version of yourself is just as awesome. I think this starts with being realistic about yourself. Not everyone is built like a super model, and we can't compare ourselves to others as a measure of how well we're doing. We're our own worst critics unfortunately. When I think of my best friend, I think of how fun she is to hang out with, how well we get along, how much she cracks me up, how I can be myself around her... I don't think about how big her boobs are, if she's skinny enough, what size her jeans are, or wonder if she ate too much sugar or carbs today. For some reason it's easier for us to see the good in our loved ones, and not all the good in ourselves. Being realistic means that you accept who you are. If you know you are a person who isn't going to workout or find a lifestyle diet that you stick with, then accept the body type that comes out of that lifestyle - celebrate the free time you have instead since you aren't a gym rat and don't need to count calories everyday, go do something else that is what you love instead and feel great about that. If you're working out regularly and eating a healthy diet everyday and you love doing it, then you'll see positive results on the inside regardless of how you look on the outside, although in my experience, usually the outside will follow suit eventually. But be realistic here too, you say you already eat healthy normally, but only you know if that's really true day-to-day or if it's a blanket statement that just sounds good. If eating healthy means (and I'm just making stuff up here for example) most days you're good but on a decent number of days you eat a ton of sugar and/or processed foods, then that's your reality. If that's how you like it, then be happy with it and accept that there might be some body changes or health ramifications from living that way. We make choices and those choices give us results. Most things don't just happen to us.

    I would suggest:
    1) evaluating yourself and being realistic - are you happy with the way you live and can you accept what comes out of it? are you wanting to make any changes and if you do is it truly because it's what you want or because it's what you think you're supposed to want (society pressure and all that)? what are your awesome positives that make you a great person? why do you think anything is negative and what do you want to do it about it if anything? what are you good at? what do you love to do? what makes you happy?
    2) use your evaluation to set up goals for yourself - example, you've realized you actually love a particular hobby, set goals to get going on that hobby like learning more about it (research at the library or online, or ask someone you know who participates in that hobby), finding social groups that participate in the same hobby, going to the group the first time, if it's a hobby where you create something set a goal to create a specific item or tackle something you haven't tried before
    Setting up short and long-term goals give you something to work toward and accomplish. I think the more we accomplish in life, the more addicted we get to finishing projects and that path leads to greater drive and passion toward the things we love to do.
    3) celebrate you and your accomplishments - go out for dinner, have a girls' night in, make a blog/forum/Facebook post, or give yourself a special treat
    4) keep setting goals as you progress so you have more things to work toward
    5) find a mentor who can help you on your way

    Okay, I've written way too much and maybe have gotten off topic in some areas, but mainly my idea was to impart some love for yourself. Of course, go to the doctor or gyne to get any health concerns ruled out. Talk to them about your health goals too if that's important to you. If you have a doctor that doesn't get you or is insensitive, find another one. I know you're young, but you can do it. I had to find my own gynecologist when I was 18 because my mom refused to deal with it. I had to find one in the insurance plan and that I liked and I had to drive myself to the appointment. I did it though, because it was important to me. Ask friends or other people you know and trust if they have a doctor they like. You could absolutely have an underlying health issue that no one has thought to check for, but you could also be perfectly healthy and just have a particular genetic disposition to collect fat cells in a particular area. I also second the idea that wheat/gluten and/or dairy can also contribute to bloat in your midsection. If you are eating anything that makes you feel painfully gassy or bloated regularly, or makes going to the bathroom unpleasant, then you probably do have a food allergy or sensitivity that you could work on and would help you feel better inside and out. Most doctors will suggest an elimination diet to try and figure out sensitive foods. Elimination diets sound like a huge pain initially, but are a great tool to help you with your health. Ask your doctor about it if it's something you're interested in or you think might help. If you do have fat cells that just like to collect there, in general, regular workouts and a good diet will help. I tend to get thicker in my middle, thighs and upper arms when I'm not working out. After several weeks (>4 weeks at least) I have noticed my stomach slowly getting smaller, and muscle definition showing up in my triceps. If I stop working out, then I go back to where I was. You have to decide what work you want to do and if you have to do it always in order to maintain your body in a certain way, then will it be worth the time and effort. Anyway, good luck with your health inside and out!