Dating Question

simplycorey
simplycorey Posts: 721 Member
in Chit-Chat
The other dating thread got me thinking. Guys - do you like it when women approach you or do you like to be the ones to approach them? Ladies - do you feel comfortable approaching guys or do you think they should pursue you?
«13

Replies

  • Mobilemuscle
    Mobilemuscle Posts: 945 Member
    Im old fashioned
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    I prefer it when a girl lets me know she is interested. I have a perfect rejection record when I am the first to approach.
  • Mobilemuscle
    Mobilemuscle Posts: 945 Member
    I have a perfect rejection record when I am the first to approach.

    Thats actually impressive
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    I have a perfect rejection record when I am the first to approach.

    Thats actually impressive

    It really is. I have done it before just to test it. :laugh:
  • TheSlorax
    TheSlorax Posts: 2,401 Member
    Very interested to see the answers
  • simplycorey
    simplycorey Posts: 721 Member
    I have a perfect rejection record when I am the first to approach.

    Thats actually impressive

    It really is. I have done it before just to test it. :laugh:

    That's kind of funny ...

    I guess I'm a bit old fashioned myself. I will flirt and let the guy know I'm interested but I don't feel comfortable asking a guy out and I'd rather they pursue me. But ... I haven't been single a whole lot the last 19 years and I was wondering what guys expect nowadays. lol
  • Mobilemuscle
    Mobilemuscle Posts: 945 Member
    I have a perfect rejection record when I am the first to approach.

    Thats actually impressive

    It really is. I have done it before just to test it. :laugh:

    Dont worry bro... we all get turned down.... Ive had girls just str8 turn their chair around in my face when Ive approached and said hi

    gotta shake it off
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    I have a perfect rejection record when I am the first to approach.

    Thats actually impressive

    It really is. I have done it before just to test it. :laugh:

    Dont worry bro... we all get turned down.... Ive had girls just str8 turn their chair around in my face when Ive approached and said hi

    gotta shake it off

    Doesn't bother me anymore, just part of life.
  • mister_universe
    mister_universe Posts: 6,664 Member
    Be obvious. Obvious to a guy is different than women believe. We're dumb as posts, so if you like us...best make it known. You don't have to ask him out, but you likely do have to go much further than you think in indicating your interest.
  • anemoneprose
    anemoneprose Posts: 1,805 Member
    i meet people (friends of friends; strangers) when i'm out (private parties, public places) and go from there (like, i am not dating online). it *always* starts organically through conversation, so it's hard to tell how things start -- i am usually gregarious when in a social setting (though am temperamentally introverted) & am attracted to talkative people. if there's a vibe, i see where it goes.

    *wait, i for sure do and have initiated many of these conversations.

    i am horrified when someone just randomly, out of nowhere, just decides he likes the looks of me from afar and makes "an approach". ew ew ew.
  • jamiem1102
    jamiem1102 Posts: 1,196 Member
    I feel like the only guys that have ever asked me out are in the categories of: homeless, drunk, and/or has terrible hygiene. So basically I've come to feel comfortable doing the asking out - if I didn't, I'd end up that crazy dog lady that offers bread crusts to strangers.
  • pawnstarNate
    pawnstarNate Posts: 1,728 Member
    Back when I was in the dating scene, I was the guy who would throw a wink or a nod and send a drink over to get a reaction. Don't know if that's considered making the first move or not.
    I preferred a girl to come to me. Probably the Leo in me wanting their attention
  • Cheechos
    Cheechos Posts: 293
    As a female, I don't mind making the first move. If I'm interested then I will express that interest pretty clearly.
  • Chieflrg
    Chieflrg Posts: 9,097 Member
    I am most comfortable being the pursuer. I've always been very selective on who I date. I know who I am as a person and I know what I want in a relationship. I'm not into wasting my time or others when it comes to dating.

    I get a good amount of women approaching me. Being approached isn't uncomfortable for me. Although at times I get some crazies that have issues and then things get real uncomfortable.
  • BonnieandClyde29
    BonnieandClyde29 Posts: 1,026 Member
    I've always been straight up with guys for the most part I make it VERY CLEAR I am interested and what I wanted relationship or not :wink: :heart: :love:
  • Bucky83
    Bucky83 Posts: 1,194 Member
    When I have dutch courage, I will give it a go to approach a guy.

    Both times, I've been rejected.

    So, yes, I'd rather a guy approach me. Twice being rejected as a female hurts (though I do now understand how it hurts for guys too.)
  • Naomi0504
    Naomi0504 Posts: 964 Member
    I guess I'm a bit old fashioned myself. I will flirt and let the guy know I'm interested but I don't feel comfortable asking a guy out and I'd rather they pursue me. But ...

    This is how I feel too, I wouldn't be comfortable asking a guy out, making the first move, whatever.
  • sinistras
    sinistras Posts: 244 Member
    I met my husband on Match.com almost 7 years ago. Technically, I "weeded" him out with my search criteria. I'm glad he liked what he saw and had the guts to ask me out (even though he was 1 inch shorter than my height "requirement" and 1 year younger than me! I was SOooo Silly...)

    "Old fashioned" but also firm believer that it really is nature's way that women attract; men pursue.
  • AlongCame_Molly
    AlongCame_Molly Posts: 2,835 Member
    I asked for my first kiss with my now-husband, then openly admitted I was in love with him and wanted to be serious...it worked with him! :laugh:
  • padams2359
    padams2359 Posts: 1,093 Member
    When I have dutch courage, I will give it a go to approach a guy.

    Both times, I've been rejected.

    So, yes, I'd rather a guy approach me. Twice being rejected as a female hurts (though I do now understand how it hurts for guys too.)

    Two whole times? Lol. If guys gave up after two times, the human race would have ceased to exist millinia ago.
  • ChancyW
    ChancyW Posts: 437 Member
    I'm not the type to approach a guy and be direct.
  • silencioesoro
    silencioesoro Posts: 318 Member
    It's a mixed bag with me, it all depends on who I liked at the time. With the current boyfriend, I made the first move - wasn't the right time, he made the move, wasn't the right time... back and forth over the years until finally, he made the final move and claimed me. Then he literally moved all the way over here.

    Sometimes being obvious is a great thing, but be careful about how obvious. Also, don't just put the ball solely in his court. Like I said, it's a mixed bag.
  • SwitzEngine
    SwitzEngine Posts: 3,418 Member
    I would like if a women would approach me. But sadly it never happens. Not even here...and it would be only a request. Maybe it's me... :-(
  • JcMey3r
    JcMey3r Posts: 431 Member
    Most guys would like to approach but a lot of guys who aren't too confident and don't want to make a fool of themselves will probably hesitate to initialize contact. The women should give a clear sign that they're interested so that the guy can make the move.

    But to answer the question I would say either party should be comfortable to make a move. If women like to chased just dont make the guy chase you so long that he just gives up.
  • jackiecamarena
    jackiecamarena Posts: 290 Member
    The other dating thread got me thinking. Guys - do you like it when women approach you or do you like to be the ones to approach them? Ladies - do you feel comfortable approaching guys or do you think they should pursue you?

    I have no problem approaching men I am interested in. I asked out my boyfriend almost four years ago now. I go after what I want. :wink:
  • Madame_Goldbricker
    Madame_Goldbricker Posts: 1,625 Member
    I've approached a bloke in a bar before & we were together for 7yrs. However, I'm crap at picking up signals. Last time a bloke came up to me at a bar I moved out the way. I assumed he'd come across to order a drink not chat me up - Did think sheesh how much room do you want like? :grumble:
  • melb_alex
    melb_alex Posts: 1,154 Member
    Be obvious. Obvious to a guy is different than women believe. We're dumb as posts, so if you like us...best make it known. You don't have to ask him out, but you likely do have to go much further than you think in indicating your interest.

    Works both ways ;) sometimes girls just don't get it either muhahaha

    I prefer the male to approach me; chivalry ;)
  • FredSetToGetFit
    FredSetToGetFit Posts: 286 Member
    I think, everybody tends to over complicate almost everything. If you want something, ask for it. I liked being approached by women, but also had no problem being the one who approaches when I were still dating. If rejected, so what? It really is not important. What is important is that you had the courage to put yourself out there.
  • Inkratlet
    Inkratlet Posts: 613 Member
    I don't like meeting people in bars.

    Maybe it's different in the US but in the UK, they are usually in various states of drunkenness and I haven't got a lot of interest in talking to someones alcohol-fuelled ego. All you have to go on when you see someone you 'like' in a bar is physical attraction. Besides, they are all too young nowadays. Where do the early-mid thirties hang out?? I actually like the internet as you can weed out the time wasters and little boys with an older woman fetish and get down to the stuff that really matters. It still takes forever to find the right one though...

    Then again, I'll probably be single forever. Too picky!
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,307 Member
    When I have dutch courage, I will give it a go to approach a guy.

    Both times, I've been rejected.

    So, yes, I'd rather a guy approach me. Twice being rejected as a female hurts (though I do now understand how it hurts for guys too.)

    Just curious...at some point you really thought it didn't?

Categories