Why do people insist on giving (bad) advice?

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  • toscarthearmada
    toscarthearmada Posts: 382 Member
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    It's because they don't know any better. There is an alarming amount of people that have no idea about eating healthy or just being healthy in general. They are repeating what they've heard or read somewhere and just want to add to the conversation. Just smile and say thank you.
  • TheRealParisLove
    TheRealParisLove Posts: 1,907 Member
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    They don't know their advice is bad. I think most people mean well, and don't wish harm on others, but if medical "experts" have such conflicting nutritional advice, those of us who didn't attend medical school are pretty much as good as reading a diet crystal ball for nutrition advice.
  • teamAmelia
    teamAmelia Posts: 1,247 Member
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    Congrats on your loss. :smile: Now, what you need to do is cut soda. Just kidding.
  • tnshncl
    tnshncl Posts: 4 Member
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    I know the feeling....unsolicited advice! Then they want to watch/monitor what you eat. It's like, "No thank you, I've got this! Worry about yourself!!!" lol Keep up the good work and do what works for YOU!:wink:
  • jessamynwest
    jessamynwest Posts: 14 Member
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    Good on you for sticking with it. I usually try to be mannerly and polite to people when they start that (and understand that something that is working for them is fine if it's working) but if they get weird/pushy or start facebook annoying me about it, I'll drop some science on them. This is a good starter article about calories.

    http://ajcn.nutrition.org/content/79/5/899S.long

    and this is a more readable approach to the same topic.

    http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2012/03/why-calories-count-the-cause-of-public-health-nutrition-problems/254887/

    I keep them bookmarked in case I need them.
  • janatarnhem
    janatarnhem Posts: 669 Member
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    different things work for different people......

    It is saying things like this that leads most people down the wrong track. It is at best a half truth.

    Different things work for different people usually only in terms of sustainability. If someone needs to avoid certain foods to avoid binging, then I'm all for it. But telling people that this is the only way to lose weight and calories don't matter is laughable.

    ^^^ couldn't agree more!
  • ejdutton
    ejdutton Posts: 329 Member
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    I think that you have done fantastically well, so don't listen to what others are telling you! You've obviously had great success with counting the calories so stick with it!!
    I've dont the carb cutting, slimming world and weight watchers diets to get little results. I started cutting the calories in August and have lost nearly 40lbs so far so it obviously works.
    Keep it up!
  • DavePFJ
    DavePFJ Posts: 212 Member
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    I'm not really on here to lose weight, but this happens with many things. The reason is because they deep down want to prove something (know more than you, etc.).
  • Tigermum9
    Tigermum9 Posts: 546 Member
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    What I mean is, people may think they are helping but...different things work for different people
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,026 Member
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    What I mean is, people may think they are helping but...different things work for different people

    I do not doubt that they think they are being helpful, but the blind leading the blind usually is not a good idea.
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
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    I don't disagree with anything you wrote except I'll say that many folks still believe that fat causes weight gain and that eating low fat is a requirement for weight loss. Look at "pay diets" like Jenny Craig. My own sibling was told not to eat avocados (this year) by Jenny Craig because they are high fat...

    Prevailing wisdom, such as it is, is ever changing. Stick around here long enough and you'll see it here even.

    Congrats on your success!

    Ugh. I had a friend who was on something, maybe Weight Watchers, and she wasn't allowed to eat watermelon. I was like "Seriously? Watermelon is one of the most nutritious and delicious things you can eat." She kept going on about glycemic index garbage (she's not diabetic).
    For many folks, the glycemic index is what works best for them.It gives them a framework. Some folks want/need that.
    I'm glad you found the approach that works best for you. That said, I've never understood the watermelon thing either.

    But yes, my point was the thing with fat is not an opinion from the 60s. It's still a commonly held and commonly taught.
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,742 Member
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    I think a lot of people have had one bit of success with a certain weigh loss program or tactic and that causes them to believe it is "the only way".

    How many people do you know who say "LOW CARB IS THE ONLY WAY!" and stuff like that...

    When I am asked how I'm losing weight and mention MFP most people irl have the reaction of "OH that won't work for me..."
  • TX_Rhon
    TX_Rhon Posts: 1,549 Member
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    Congrats on the loss!! Just keep going and let the unsolicited advice go in one ear and out the other. I get the same reactions when people see me with a Starbucks. :drinker: Which is quite often, ha!

    Keep up the good work :flowerforyou:
  • lucystacy71
    lucystacy71 Posts: 290 Member
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    Like others have said, I think those people honestly think they are being helpful. What makes it so frustrating is that what you are doing is obviously working, so why do they think you need to do anything differently?

    My dad is the worse. He should know better because he was a nurse, but he's always giving me unsolicited, unwanted, and unsafe advice. My favorite was when he told me the best way to lose some weight was to get some laxatives and then take twice the recommended dose each day. He seriously told me that, but thankfully I knew better.

    Another part of this really boils down to personal responsibility. When you tell someone that all you've done is to watch your calories and made sure to exercise more, they don't want to think it could be that simple. If it were that simple, then they no longer have their excuses to hide behind that something other than what they ate and their activity level led to their current weight. I know I was like that for a long, long time. It wasn't until I accepted that my decisions had led me to this place that I was able to start making changes.
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
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    I think a lot of people have had one bit of success with a certain weigh loss program or tactic and that causes them to believe it is "the only way".

    How many people do you know who say "LOW CARB IS THE ONLY WAY!" and stuff like that...

    When I am asked how I'm losing weight and mention MFP most people irl have the reaction of "OH that won't work for me..."
    Great point. I see this daily on here, in fact.
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
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    Good work Posh! :smile: :flowerforyou:
  • lynn1982
    lynn1982 Posts: 1,439 Member
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    It is just indicative of just how widespread misinformation about weight and fitness management really is.

    This. And Dr. Oz. ;)

    I'll never understand unsolicited advice, especially when you're doing something that works for you! That being said, for some people, counting calories is just way too overwhelming. Yes, it's easy once you get into it, but at the beginning it can be an all-consuming experience. (That was my experience, anyway. But, I kept at it...I have a friend who couldn't deal with it and went on a super restrictive diet instead. She quickly gained it all back.) For others, "trick" diets such as not eating carbs after 3pm or a cabbage soup diet WORK to lose weight...it's not that one NEEDS to do those things to lose weight (obviously), but that they're actually cutting calories. Of course, it's unsustainable... and that's why it doesn't work in the long run. Anyway, congratulations on the weight loss!
  • Chevy_Quest
    Chevy_Quest Posts: 2,012 Member
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    different things work for different people......

    It is saying things like this that leads most people down the wrong track. It is at best a half truth.

    Different things work for different people usually only in terms of sustainability. If someone needs to avoid certain foods to avoid binging, then I'm all for it. But telling people that this is the only way to lose weight and calories don't matter is laughable.

    ^^ This +1
  • sunsetzen
    sunsetzen Posts: 268 Member
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    Its just advice. Why do you insist on trying to control what others say? If you dont want to follow the advice, dont. Dont get so upset over something so trivial.
  • SLLRunner
    SLLRunner Posts: 12,943 Member
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    People are misinformed, that's all.

    For a long time my aunt believed if you don't eat after seven o'clock at night you will lose weight. Turns out her daughter told her she doesn't eat after seven seven at night and she'd lost weight. The logic behind that was the my cousin ate healthy during the day but if she ate after dinner she went for the brownies and other sweets in the house, therefore either eating to maintenance or overeating and gaining weight. :smile:

    Being fat my entire life, I grew up being told I could not eat "fattening" foods, or that certain "diets" would help me lose weight. I tried them all and they worked just fine until I went off of them and started eating normally again.

    Egg diet, cabbage soup diet, slim fast, just everything under the sun.

    Yep, what I've been doing the last several months works just fine--eating at a calorie deficit and adding in that wonderful exercise each day/ It works just fine for me. :smile:

    When people try to tell me about diets that work, I just tell them I don't diet and I don't believe in them at all. They just look at me like they've got the answer and I don't. Oh well.

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